3: Scars Remain Ch. 01

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Book Three: The Diary of a Hero - Scars Remain.
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Spartan22
Spartan22
607 Followers

Book Three: The Diary of a Hero -- Scars Remain

She blew it, and she knew it. It was the worst mistake in the world, and she couldn't take it back.

Her on-again/off-again boyfriend Luke, who was really more off-again this time, had finally come back home from war. But his return wasn't like that of the average soldier; everyone had previously thought that Luke was killed in action.

Which made the reunion all the more spectacular. It was indescribable... or at least it started off that way. The way that Luke scooped her up into his arms, holding her tightly, making her feel like she was the only one in the world in his eyes; Kaylee absolutely melted.

She kissed him passionately and begged God to freeze time itself so they could stay that way forever; she never wanted to forget that moment. It was perfect.

Well, almost perfect.

Somehow, right in the middle of his loving embrace, her emotions overwhelmed her, inexplicably turning from passion to terror. Kaylee ran away, crying uncontrollably.

He needed her desperately. And because of her own fears and insecurities, she ran. What kind of girlfriend material was she, anyway? It's no wonder they were more 'off' than 'on'.

Kaylee cried and cried, vowing to stay in her apartment for as long as she could. She didn't want to see her best friend Audrey, she didn't want to see Luke's sister Faith, and she especially didn't want to see Luke. She loved him terribly, but there was no way she could face him again. Her embarrassment and shame was too great.

And after that horrible letdown, there was no way she could compete with Luke's desert girlfriend... whomever she was.

Phone calls went unreturned, texts were deleted, and she could outwait anyone who dared to ring her doorbell, no matter how many times. Kaylee felt incredibly guilty for leaving Luke on the most important day of his life, but she just couldn't take it. Luke had somehow managed to cheat death twice. The first time alone almost destroyed her. Kaylee knew she was overreacting, but she couldn't escape a nagging feeling that a third time was coming, and this time he wouldn't make it.

She didn't know if she could exist in a world where Luke died. That feeling was already too well known to her. When the Air Force bereavement notification officials came to the door, mistakenly telling her that Luke did in fact die, her very soul was crushed. She knew it sounded insane, but now that he was alive, she couldn't endure something like that again. It would be unbearable.

Most of her friends unsuccessfully tried to reach out to Kaylee, time and time again, eventually giving up. Luke remained persistent, doing everything short of kicking in Kaylee's door. He finally gave up.

But Faith texted her at least twice a day, and never gave up on her. Her latest text came at just the right time.

Kaylee was already having an awful morning; as if the entire "Luke Situation" wasn't bad enough, her laptop crashed and the computer nerds on the phone said her motherboard was probably fried. To make things worse, she accidentally spilled hot soup all over the carpet. She was almost done cleaning up the mess when her phone chimed.

Kaylee sighed; she had no doubt it was another text from Faith. Kaylee really could've used a friend, as much as she hated to admit it. Reluctantly turning over her phone, she looked at the message:

Faith Patton: Wanted you to know I'm still praying for you! Phil 4:13: "I can do anything through Jesus Christ who strengthens me". Love you, call me anytime! :) -Faith"

Kaylee shook her head but also gave up a weak smile, knowing Faith never gave up on her. That was Faith, Luke's bubbly sister. Always looking on the bright side of life.

Kaylee thought for a moment, debating whether to ignore her as usual, or whether she should risk putting her feelings on the line and dare to consult with the sister of the man that tormented the fiber of her very being. Through no fault of his own, of course. Luke owned her heart, whether he wanted to or not.

Biting her lower lip, she mumbled, "I'm going to regret this," as she typed back:

Kaylee Reed: ty Faith, i lke tht vrse

Within seconds, her phone chimed again. Kaylee knew her simple response essentially cracked opened the door to what she called "loving harassment", a definition that could only apply to Faith Patton. She winced, knowing Faith was ready to kick the door in.

Faith Patton: Let's do dinner tonight, my treat; they opened a new Mexican place, but I know how much you love Thai. Which one?

Kaylee grinned, admiring Faith's forwardness. She didn't ask if Kaylee wanted to eat, she asked where she wanted to eat. Faith had the potential to be such a devious monster if she wasn't such a caring, sweet girl. That part of Faith vividly reminded Kaylee of someone else she knew very well back in high school -- herself.

Kaylee Reed: very subtle. Lucky for u i have cabin fever. Mex -- come get me at 7?

Faith Patton: It's a date! See you at 7

Kaylee Reed: NO LUKE! Not 1 word. Im not ready. I mean it

Faith Patton: Lol would I do that to you? Ok, no Luke. This time.

"Brat," Kaylee smiled. "Yep, she's definitely too much like me. Now I know what my parents had to deal with." Kaylee stared at her phone for an entire minute before typing up another reply.

Instead of hitting the send button, she erased it. Hesitating a few moments, Kaylee sighed and typed it again, only to erase it a second time.

Finally, wincing the entire time, she typed it in a third time and hit the send button quickly so she couldn't change her mind:

Kaylee Reed: Tell Luke Im sorry, and I miss him.

The ten-second wait for Faith's reply was the slowest ten seconds of her life. For a moment, the excitement she felt sent her right back to high school as she both anticipated and received Faith's reply. She felt immature, but she didn't care.

Faith Patton: Oh please; you and Luke are going to get married some day once you both quit being so freaking stubborn. You can tell him yourself!

Kaylee was shocked, her eyes opened wide while rereading the text. That was so unlike Faith. She couldn't take her eyes off of the word "married". Another message popped in:

Faith Patton: Oops! Stupid autocorrect! What it should have said was "Please know that Luke feels the same way and misses you too, even if he won't admit it. But I will tell him!" :)

Her eyes narrowed intensely as she said, "Faith, you little liar! Autocorrect, my ass." Still, she smiled thinking about Faith's cruel little trick.

It was only a small and insignificant conversation through nothing more than electronic words on a tiny screen, but somehow her horrible day didn't seem to be so horrible anymore.

---

Faith did a good job of kicking the door in. Somehow she managed to persuade Kaylee to have dinner with her regularly, and it wasn't long afterwards that Audrey joined them. It was just the three girls once again and it almost felt like everything was back to normal, even though Kaylee knew better.

With great patience and determination, Faith and Audrey dragged Kaylee back to the real world; it wasn't the first time Audrey had to pull Kaylee out of her shell, and it wasn't likely to be the last.

Faith knew Kaylee didn't want to talk about Luke, but she did try her hardest to subtly inject him into their conversations. She updated Kaylee with Luke's day-to-day life, about the progression of physical therapy for his shoulder and how the Air Force continued to visit him for a myriad of reasons. Faith suspected Luke would have to be discharged because of his medical injuries but couldn't be sure.

Faith even told Kaylee that she, Luke, and their parents originally began talking to a counselor the Air Force referred them to. Using that platform as a segue, Faith took a major leap, choosing her words carefully, "You know, the counselor mentioned you; she said that after all you've been through, you are certainly welcome to see her. In fact, she encourages it."

Kaylee hesitated before answering, picking apart her garden salad. She wanted to pretend she didn't hear the question, but she quietly murmured across the restaurant table, "That might be a little strange, seeing Luke at a counselor's office before we get a chance to talk to each other. I don't know..."

A rare moment of irritation crossed Faith's face, something Kaylee wasn't used to seeing. In fact, it almost looked like Faith was angry. Putting her fork down, Faith huffed, "Well, let me explain a little more. All four of us started going; we really like the counselor. She seems to know her stuff. Luke only went the first few times. He isn't going anymore. Mom, dad, and I still are."

Kaylee was shocked. She had deliberately avoided talking about Luke every chance she had, but she couldn't help blurt out, "Why the frick is he not going? After everything he went through... I mean, if half of the things are true about what they say he went though..." Kaylee caught herself before her voice escalated any further; she had to stop talking just to catch her breath.

"Kaylee," Audrey said softly, trying not to rile her up any further, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. And everyone is doing everything they can to lead him down the right path."

"Yeah?" Kaylee retorted, "Well, then we hold the stupid horses head under water until he drinks, don't we?"

Faith was just as upset. She had to take a drink of water, hoping to calm her nerves. Recomposing herself, she said, "I know. All of us have been trying to talk him into going back there but he keeps brushing us off. He's actually getting ready to move out tomorrow. He's been staying at home, trying to regain a sense of normalcy after everything that happened, but he says he's ready to move on. I don't think he is, but he's been pretty insistent."

"Where's he going," Kaylee asked, trying to sound nonchalant, as if she wasn't all that interested.

"Eagle Bluff apartments. He's just so... so..." Faith's face turned red, her hands raised and her fingers spread wide as if ready to strangle her brother; the more she talked the more exasperated she became.

Audrey spoke up on her behalf, "He's not really the same Luke, Kaylee. He just seems... I don't know. Really angry. About everything; the little things. He still has some healing to do."

"I knew it was bad, but..." Kaylee said, separating her food with her fork although she no longer had her appetite. She wanted to cry, but as exhausted as she was it felt like she was out of tears.

Audrey looked over at Faith and then back to Kaylee. "He's good at hiding it, though. Most people outside his family don't see it. Even Aaron doesn't believe us."

Faith added, "I know he's been through a lot, and seen the most awful, horrible things anyone can see. I mean, my worst nightmares can't even begin to compare to what he actually experienced. He's strong, but he can't do it alone, and right now he doesn't want anyone to help him."

Taking a deep breath, Audrey said, "Kaylee, you might want to think about talking to Luke. He's angry at you for the way you left him, but we all know he loves you. Maybe you can get through to him."

A stunned silence overcame Kaylee. She stuttered, "I... I don't know. He probably hates my guts after... after..."

Faith stepped in and said, "Kaylee, you don't have to right away. Just think about it. We know you love him the same way he loves you, but you are both clearly hurting. Maybe you can both go talk to our counselor? He'll follow you if you go. I'm worried about him. I know you are, too." Kaylee looked down at her plate, digesting every word.

With barely a whisper, Kaylee said, "What's wrong with the two of us? I know we weren't exactly the all-American couple." She continued, choking out, "But he was my hero. He still is, but he found somebody else. And then, to make things worse, I didn't even welcome him back home."

A few sniffs came from Audrey and Faith; both girls were misting up. Faith said, "Kaylee, I haven't heard anything about that other girl; I really don't think she's in the picture anymore."

"You don't know that," Kaylee sniffed.

"True; Luke hasn't really talked about anything from over there, but he's not sending texts or emails or calling anyone, or doing the things he did when you two were together. You could tell just by looking at him that he was head over heels in love with you. Heck, I'll bet you anything he's still madly in love with you despite everything that has happened. All of that aside, I just don't want to see you hurting. You're practically family. Every minute Luke was in the desert, you were with us. When we thought he died, you were with us. Please... at least do it for us? If you can't do it for Luke, will you do it for me?"

After a few moments, Kaylee reluctantly nodded, "I... I'll think about it."

I -- Scars Remain

Faith continuously reminded Kaylee that time would heal her, even if the scars remained. Those words resonated in the back of Kaylee's mind, sticking with her as she made every effort to get through the wounds of her past.

If it wasn't for Faith and Audrey, Kaylee didn't know where she would be right now. Aimlessly wandering half-naked and filthy in the back of some alley, maybe. Both girls were instrumental in getting Kaylee back on track, convincing her to go with the Patton family to see their counselor. She was terrified at first, but it became easier when she realized she could get everything off of her chest, talking to someone about her chaotic feelings and out of balance emotions. Even if Luke wasn't there. Kaylee even saw the counselor by herself. It took quite a few sessions, but gradually she felt her upside-down world beginning to turn right-side up.

Eventually she worked up the courage to try and talk to Luke. The only problem was, despite trying several times, Luke made it clear he didn't want anything to do with her. On two separate occasions, she motivated herself enough to drive down to his apartment. She knew he was home -- his Challenger was parked outside in his designated spot -- but despite ringing the doorbell repeatedly for ten minutes, he wouldn't answer the door. She left and sat in her Beamer, waiting several hours in case he left the apartment for a grocery run or a jog, or whatever. He never came out.

The second time, before she knocked on the door she could have sworn she heard someone inside. Still, after knocking he still didn't answer so she went back to her car to wait. Forty-five minutes later, Kaylee caught Luke coming outside just long enough to take the trash out. That confirmed it for sure... Luke was deliberately avoiding her.

Kaylee was crushed. Luke didn't want to see her, and short of knocking his door down and slapping some common sense into him there wasn't anything she could do anything about it. Besides, Faith hadn't convinced her that he wasn't still seeing that other girl.

---

"Kaylee, ohmygoshohmygosh, did you hear Steve and Mick are having another party?" Audrey's excitement was too much for Kaylee this early in the morning. Her coffee hadn't kicked in yet. Kaylee switched the phone to her other ear.

"It's over the Fourth of July!" That was just like Audrey, skipping all customary social greetings over the phone because of her unbridled excitement, like "Hello Kaylee!" or "Good morning, Kaylee!" Nope, just a bunch of "Oh my gosh's" sandwiched together with a shrieking voice.

"Um, so we're skipping the 'Hi'. I'm ok with that, but when's the last time you were this excited over a party, even if it is the Fourth? Is this about Steve? I thought you two were over," Kaylee asked. Covering the phone, she whispered across the table to Faith, "It's Audrey."

Faith smiled, holding her iced mocha with both of her hands and told Kaylee, "Tell her I said hi."

Audrey continued, "No... we are. Me and Steve are done, I mean. That's not why I called."

With one quick breath, Audrey rattled off, "Steve said Mick invited Cindy and that Cindy told Mick she ran into Luke at the grocery store and invited him to the party, which means Cindy is taking Luke to the party, and Cindy asked Luke if he had a girlfriend and he said no which means his Air Force girlfriend isn't his girlfriend anymore..." Coming up for air, she reiterated, "So of course we haaave to go."

Anyone other than Kaylee might have had a hard time understanding what she had just said, but fortunately, even without the kick of caffeine, Kaylee fluently spoke 'Audrese'.

The silence on the other end of the phone prompted Audrey to say, "Kaylee, hello?"

Faith didn't hear what Audrey told her, but judging by the half angry/half horrified look on her face, she knew Kaylee was ready to explode like a volcano.

After a few seconds of processing Audrey's words, Kaylee asked, "Cindy is taking Luke to the party? Did I hear you right?" Kaylee's shock was evident to both girls.

Faith almost choked on her drink, understanding the ramifications Kaylee was faced with.

Audrey replied, "Yes, but..."

As Kaylee slowly started to rise in her chair, she cut off Audrey and shouted, "That little slutbag is taking Luke to the party? Great... so he dumps the desert whore... for Cindy? Cindy treated him worse in high school than everyone else combined! He finally chooses to leave his apartment... to... to... Look, I was awful to him, I know, but Cindy took it to a whole new level. Why would she... and why would Luke..."

Turning to Faith, she blurted, "What the hell is wrong with your brother?"

Faith sat there motionless, but Audrey quickly interjected over the line, "Kaylee, throttle back, hon. As far as I can tell, it's not like they are dating -- yet, anyway. Luke's finally decided to go out in public, and the last thing you want is for Cindy to put the moves on him, right? That's why it's important we go to the party."

Slowly settling down, sinking back into her chair -- much to Faith's relief -- Kaylee took a deep breath and said, "Ok, maybe you're right. But Audrey, I'm warning you, I'll be there watching. If she even thinks of doing something to hurt Luke, I'll literally rip her head off."

Audrey snickered, "Literally? There you go again. Just go easy, killer."

Kaylee wasn't amused. "No, you don't get it, Audrey. Luke might be some military badass now, but he's still sweet and loving and trusting, and she has the potential to rip his heart out. I might have lost my chance to be with him, but even if he won't talk to me, I'm not going to stand by and watch him get hurt."

"I know, hon; no one is a better protector than you. Maybe you should just focus on what you'll wear to the party."

Spartan22
Spartan22
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AnonymousAnonymous3 months ago

They're still behaving like children. Back-and-forth, round-and-round, until the author decides to put us out of our misery. Come on already.

sennodensennodenalmost 2 years ago

I like this story overall, but it's really just starting to seem like when Kaylee doesn't run from Luke, it's the other way around, over and over again in an endless circle.

dgfergiedgfergieabout 3 years ago

bunch of mixed kids, love, hate, love who knows?

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 5 years ago
Fabulous story teller

I wish he would write some more.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 5 years ago
First Timer

This is my first time reading anything by this author. I probably should have started at the beginning, with book 1, but hey, I can always go back and pick it up later. It seems like a pretty good story is taking place. It’ll be interesting to see where it goes.

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