A Clean Start

As Toby and I talked over dinner, I realized how much I liked him. I had a huge crush on Toby. He was a really nice guy, handsome, big and sexy. I wanted to kiss him and run my hands over his bald head.

I pulled into the apartment parking lot outside our building just before him and waited outside our doors for him. I took a deep breath and decided to make a move. I grabbed his hand.

"Toby... it's still early. Do you want to come in? We can continue our talk... I really like you... and I'd really like to get to know you better."

He looked confused, like he wasn't sure if he was going to accept or not. I dropped his hand when he shook his head.

"Sorry, Pete, but I got an early shift tomorrow, so I'm gonna do a little reading and then hit the hay."

"Sure, Toby. I understand. See ya later."

I quickly unlocked my door and hurried inside so that he didn't see the tears threatening to fall from my eyes. I was embarrassed and rejected and I wasn't sure how I was going to be able to face him again without feeling humiliated.

***

Things got slightly better the rest of the week. Mike and I got along fine at work. He was as friendly as before, but without any sexual undertones. I caught him checking out my butt once in the break room, but he didn't make any advances.

When I worked out with Toby on Wednesday, I was a little bit embarrassed having been rejected by him two days ago. He appeared to be uncomfortable as well and that made it worse. But by the end of the workout, things were mostly back to normal. After our workout, I followed Toby into the shower trying not to look at him, and took the shower furthest from him on the other side of the room. I quickly showered and said 'See ya later, Tank' as I hurried out of the shower and got dressed and left before he was finished.

Max joined us at the gym again on Friday. They helped me with my strength workout and while I did the treadmill, they continued their workout. Afterward, I stopped and got a drink from the water fountain. By the time I got undressed, they were already showering, and I picked the shower furthest from them.

"What're you doin' way over there?" Max shouted to me as he soaped himself up. "You gone shy all of the sudden?"

"Leave him alone, Max," Toby growled.

I caught Toby's eye and turned around and finished washing myself. As I was getting dressed, Max and Toby came out of the shower with towels wrapped around their waists. I willed myself not to look, and hurried and put my pants on.

"We're going out to dinner," Max said to me. "You comin'?"

"Um, I got some leftovers I should eat before they go bad. But next time, okay?" I said.

"Come on, Petey," Toby quietly prodded and I relented and agreed to join them.

The three of us drove to the restaurant and Max ran in to put our names on the list while Toby and I waited outside.

"Petey... I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable."

"It's okay, Tank. I'm just embarrassed. I thought you liked me..."

"Petey..."

"You don't need to explain."

"It's just that... I don't really date."

"It's okay. Let's just pretend it never happened," I said as my voice quivered. I turned away from him and closed my eyes.

Luckily Max walked up to end our awkward conversation. "Five to ten minutes," he said.

After we placed our order, Toby got up to use the bathroom.

"So, what's up with you and Tank?" Max asked me.

"Nothing."

Max raised his eyebrow. "Bullshit."

I sighed. "I humiliated myself by telling him that I liked him."

"And?"

"'And' what? He turned me down. He's not interested."

"Oh, he's interested."

"Yeah, I can tell. All that uncomfortable silence and tension."

"Give him time, Pete. Get to know him."

"I think he made it pretty clear that he doesn't like me in that way."

I shook my head as Toby returned to the table. I ate my dinner quietly. I listened and laughed when appropriate, but didn't really offer much to the conversation.

***

I went to the movies on Saturday night with Toby, Max and Kristy and we saw the latest new release. We headed to the sports bar afterward and I drank too much. I was finishing my third beer and giggling at something stupid that Max said when I realized that I was drunk.

"Am I drunk?" I said with a giggle.

Max laughed, "Uh, yeah."

I put my hands on Max's shoulder and arm to hold myself steady and I giggled.

Toby was not amused. He frowned at me disapprovingly and I shrank in my seat. They made me stop after that and gave me water to drink. When we were driving home, my dick hardened in my pants. Man, was I horny. I giggled and then yawned.

"I'm tired," I said.

"We're almost home," Toby grumbled.

I leaned my head on Max's shoulder and closed my eyes and Max put his arm around me. I jumped when I heard a door slam. I opened my eyes to see that were were home and Toby was storming off into his apartment. When I tried to get out of the truck, I fell onto my hands and knees on the ground.

Max came around and helped me up. Kristy took my other arm and Max fished my keys out of my pants pocket and gave them to Kristy, who unlocked and opened the door. They helped me inside and set me down on the couch.

"I'm gonna go talk to Tank," Kristy said. "Get him some aspirin and water and get him to bed."

"I don't feel good, Max," I moaned. He helped me to the bathroom and everything went black.

***

When I woke up the next morning, my head was killing me. I looked at the clock and it was just before 6 AM. A little bit of daylight was spilling into the room from the window and I groaned and rolled over. I jumped when I saw Max in bed with me. I panicked when I realized that I was completely naked and he was wearing only a pair of boxer shorts.

I sat up and groaned as my head throbbed. "Oh, god..."

Max sat up on his elbows. "Drink that water and swallow the pills on your nightstand. Drink the whole thing."

I did as he asked and then fell back onto my pillow and pulled the blankets up to my neck and moaned.

"Jesus, you're a lightweight," he said. "You had, what? Two beers?"

"I guess. I've never been that drunk before," I said. "Wait, why are you in my bed?"

"By the time I got you cleaned up and into bed, it was late. I was exhausted."

"Cleaned up?"

"You don't remember? You fucking puked all over the bathroom. I had to shower you, put you to bed, and then clean up your mess."

"Oh, God, I am so sorry."

"Don't worry about it, Pete. We just have to keep an eye on you next time."

"Thanks, Max. I'm glad you're my friend."

"Me, too, Pete."

Max rolled over and I hugged him. When I touched his body, I started to get hard and I know he felt it.

Max looked into my eyes and my breathing quickened. He leaned down and gently kissed me and ran his hand down to my briefs and rubbed my dick on top of my underwear. I reached down to his boxers. He was rock hard and it was sticking out of the fly opening. We began kissing as I wrapped my hand around his bone. It felt big and wide. It was thick, but flat instead of cylindrical. I could feel the hard tube on the underside as I slid my hand up and down. Max slipped his hand inside my briefs and grasped my dick. We French kissed passionately as we stroked each other. Our hands moved in rhythm with each other, gripping hard and stroking fast.

"Max, I'm gonna come," I whispered. I closed my eyes and grunted as I shot weeks worth of come onto our bodies and the sheets.

Max rolled onto his back and pushed the covers down and I got my first glimpse of it hard. Max pushed his boxers down under his balls and put his hand on the back of my neck and pushed down. I grabbed a hold of the base and wrapped my lips around the head of his cock. I tasted the sweet and salty sticky fluid as I swirled my tongue around it. I gripped the shaft tightly and began sucking and sliding my mouth up and down. Max's breathing rapidly quickened and his hand gripped the back of my head.

"Oh, fuck, Pete, here it comes," he whispered. Max grunted and thrust up into my mouth as he filled it with his hot come. I eagerly swallowed every drop, then licked his shaft clean. I let it fall from my mouth as it softened and Max pulled his boxers up.

I laid back on the bed and instantly felt a wave of guilt flush over me. Max was my friend and I didn't really like him sexually, but I was really horny. I didn't want our friendship to be ruined.

"Max--"

"Pete--"

We looked at each other and smiled.

"Pete, we shouldn't have done that," Max said.

"I know."

"Fuck," Max muttered as he got up and started to get dressed. "Tank can never know about this, you got me?"

"I won't tell... but is what we did really that bad?"

"Are you fucking kidding me? He will fucking kill me if he finds out," he said as he pulled his socks and shoes on.

"I don't want this to mess up our friendship... but it's not really any of Tank's business what we did, Max."

Max sighed and sat down on the bed. "Look, Pete. Tank likes you. And I mean he really likes you. He's just messed up a little bit. He lets you call him Toby for Christ's sake. I've only known two people to call him Toby. One is his mom. And Alex was the other."

"Who's Alex?"

"Tank needs to tell you about Alex. Just give him some time and get to know him. If he finds out what we did, I don't think it'll matter for you, but Tank won't ever forgive me. Just promise me you'll never tell him. If it comes up, I left when we woke up."

"Okay, Max."

I got up and pulled on a clean t-shirt and underwear and walked Max to the front door. I bolted the door behind him and he quickly left. I heard his Mustang pull out of the parking lot and I went back to bed and laid down, thinking about what Max had said about Toby as I fell asleep.

***

Max and I pretended like nothing ever happened between us, but the next time we showered in the gym, he got hard when he saw me naked. I blushed and turned away as Toby laughed at him and said he needed to get laid.

Max laughed and said, "Maybe Pete can come over here and take care of it."

Toby stopped laughing and his body stiffened and he growled at Max, "Petey's not one of your boy sluts, Max. Leave him the fuck alone."

Toby cut his eyes to me looking slightly embarrassed and shut off his shower and grabbed his towel. Max looked at me as if to say "I told you so" and I shook my head and followed Toby out of the shower. Toby and I quietly got dressed.

"I think he was kidding, Toby."

"I know... I... I don't know what got into me."

"It's okay. I'm glad to have you looking out for me," I said and flashed him a big smile and he smiled back and ruffled my hair.

Max walked out of the shower to his locker with his towel around his neck. His face was flushed red and his dick was semi-erect and he was panting a little bit.

Toby looked him over and frowned. "Dude, you're fucking nasty."

Max chuckled. "Hey, if no one's gonna take care of it for me, I gotta take matters into my own hand."

I blushed when I finally realized what Max did in the shower after we left. I turned to finish getting dressed. The three of us headed out to dinner afterward and then home.

The next time we went out to the sports bar, I only drank half a glass of beer, then switched to Coke.

***

A couple of weeks later, Max wanted to go to a gay sports bar in Atlanta. Toby didn't really want to go, but Max and Kristy practically forced him. I had never been, but I was up for it.

It was like any other sports bar, except all of the guys were gay. There were some ladies there as well, but it was definitely not our regular sports bar. Max ditched us pretty quick to stalk a hot young guy by the bar. Kristy went to play pool, leaving me and Toby sitting together. I slowly sipped my beer and he downed his pretty quick and when no one came to get him another, he went up to the bar. His bubble butt looked really hot in his camouflage shorts and I couldn't help but stare.

"Hey," a deep voice said to me, breaking my concentration on Toby's butt.

I looked up and a handsome young bear was standing next to the table holding a bottle of Bud.

"Hi," I said back.

"I haven't seen you around here before," he said. "I'm Ben."

"Nice to meet you, Ben. I'm Pete."

"Can I buy you another drink?"

"Um, well... I'm kind of here with someone."

"Who? That guy at the bar?"

I looked over at Toby and he was talking with a muscular stud. The guy was leaning close to talk to Toby over the noise and they were smiling at each other. The guy had his hand on Toby's arm. I was so jealous I couldn't stand it. I felt like I was going to start crying and I looked away. I looked down at my bottle and starting playing with the label.

Ben sat down next to me. "You really like him, huh?"

I nodded.

"But he's not into you."

It wasn't a question, but a statement. I shrugged and took a sip of my beer.

"Come with me. I'll help you get over him," Ben said. He chuckled and pushed my shoulder with his.

I laughed. "I'm sure. You seem like a really nice guy and you're really cute, but..."

"Okay, Pete, I understand. Here's my number in case you change your mind."

Ben pulled out a business card and gave it to me. We shook hands and I watched him get up and walk off to join his friends.

"Who was that?"

I looked up to see Toby sit down across the table from me.

"Ben."

"You get his number?" he asked. He had no expression on his face that I could read.

"Yeah... he seemed like a nice guy... but I'm not really looking to meet anyone new right now."

I looked down and took a sip of my beer.

"Me neither," he replied.

Toby and I watched the game on the big TV and drank our beer. We occasionally made small talk during the commercials or he commented on the game, but mostly it was quiet. In the space of about half an hour, Toby got hit on twice and turned them down nicely, but I could tell by the way he checked them out that he thought they were attractive. And it hurt my feelings.

"This is why I hate coming to places like this," he grumbled after the second guy left.

"Yeah, it must be awful to have hot guys falling all over you," I mumbled.

Toby shot me a dirty look. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"These guys obviously think you're hot, Tank. If you'd rather be with them, I don't care. You don't have to stick around with me out of obligation. I can take care of myself. Excuse me."

I got up and went into the bathroom and locked myself into a stall and cried like a fucking baby. I kicked myself for being stupid and wiped my face. I went to the sink and splashed water on my face and dried off with a paper towel and headed back to the table. A hot guy was sitting in my seat across from Toby. I sighed. I looked around for Kristy or Max. Kristy was still playing pool with a guy and a couple of girls. Max was still sitting with his new friend.

I walked up to the bar to order another beer. I finally got the bartender's attention, but when I opened my mouth to order--

"He'll have a Coke, and I'll have another Bud."

I looked up as Toby finished his beer then put his empty bottle on the bar in front of me. Toby paid for our drinks and left a tip. He put his hand in the middle of my back and pushed me back towards our table.

I sat down in my seat and Toby sat down next to me instead of across from me.

"I don't need you to feel sorry for me, Tank," I said quietly. "I get that you're not interested in me, but I can deal with it."

"It's not that I don't like you, Petey. It's... complicated."

Toby sighed then put his arm around my shoulders and squeezed me in for a quick hug. He left his arm lightly resting on the back of my chair, his hand touching my shoulder. It felt so nice. I slumped down in my chair slightly and moved in a little closer to him. He didn't object, and I smiled to myself when his arm moved from the chair to my shoulder and he pulled me closer to him. We sat like this quietly watching the game on the big TV, Toby sipping his beer. When I leaned against him getting closer, he didn't object. In fact, he looked down at me and smiled.

It was getting late when Kristy and Max walked up and sat down across from us. They were both looking at us with big grins on their faces.

"What's going on here?" Kristy asked Toby as she wiggled her eyebrows. "Anything new I should know about?"

"What?" Toby asked. "Oh, I just figured the assholes would stop hitting on us if we were sitting together."

Toby jerked his arm off my shoulder and moved away from me. I sat up straight in my chair and looked away.

"Dude, that's just cold," Max said under his breath to Toby.

Toby stood up. "Are y'all ready to go?" he asked, the annoyance clearly showing in his voice.

We walked quietly to the truck.

"You okay?" Max mouthed to me and I nodded.

When we pulled into the parking lot, I jumped out of the truck and shut the door and ran straight to my door. I unlocked it and went inside with out a word. I bolted it behind me and leaned against it and started to cry.

I could hear the three of them arguing in the hallway and then Toby's door slam shut. I jumped when someone knocked on my door. I looked through the peephole and let Max in.

"You okay, Pete?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

"If you're fine, then why have you been crying?"

I wiped my face. "God, I'm so stupid, Max. I really thought..."

I sighed and sat down on the couch. Max sat down with me.

"Kristy is talking to him. Give him time, Pete."

"I'm not giving him anything. I've been humiliated enough! I'm tired of chasing him. Look. This guy wants me," I said as I pulled out Ben's business card. "I bet I wouldn't have to give him time."

"Is that what you really want, though?"

I sighed again. I leaned my head against the back of the couch and looked at Max. I reached my hand up and ran my fingers over his shaved head and then through his short mohawk. I put my hand on his thigh and lightly rubbed it. I could see Max was partially hard in his jeans. His dick made a lump down towards his right leg.

"Maybe we could help each other out again, Max," I whispered.

"Pete. Don't," Max said as he moved my hand off his leg. Max stood up. "I'd better go."

I stood up and walked him to the front door.

"Thanks, Max," I whispered. He smiled at me and went and knocked on Toby's door. I bolted the door behind him and got ready for bed.

***

Toby pretended like nothing happened when I saw him on Monday to work out. Various excuses kept us from going out on the weekends for a couple of weeks. When we finally did, we went back to our regular sports bar.

Saturday in the middle of May, Trevor and Annie threw a birthday get together for me at their house in Snellville. It was so good to see them. I hadn't seen them in a couple of months. Annie was getting so big. They were having a boy and the former spare room was decorated so cute in baby blue and teddy bears.

I was pleasantly surprised when Toby, Kristy and Max showed up. Toby was wearing green basketball shorts and a black tank top, which showed off all of his big muscles, his tattoos, and his hairy chest. At least I'd have another vision to fantasize about when I went to bed alone again.

I usually want to fade away into the background, but today I loved all of the attention. We had grilled brats and burgers. After they sang and I blew out the candles on the cake, I opened presents. I got some nice presents, mostly gift cards. Toby got me new workout clothes. I was way embarrassed to open a black jockstrap in front of everyone. There were also two pairs of skimpy running shorts and a tank top and a sleeveless t-shirt.

"You gotta show off your hot little body, Petey," he said.

I blushed bright red. "Ugh. I am not hot."

"When was the last time you looked in the mirror?" Max said.