A Cuckold's Diary Ch. 29

As if on cue, she swallowed him again. He bucked and fell back from the intense pleasure and I looked into my wife's eyes. There I saw love... and disappointment. I was watching her get her lover ready to fuck her, and all I could do was get hard and admit I was excited.

She turned to Ted and said, "Please take me to bed now."

Without a word he stood up, pulled his pant up just enough to be able to walk without tripping, and with his erection pointing the way, walked to the bedroom.

Sally stood up, walked over to me and bent over to kiss me as I sat on the floor. Just before our lips met she said, "Remember where my mouth has been," and kissed me hard and deep. Before I could even catch a breath she was gone, the bedroom door clicking shut behind her.

No worries, my love. I'll remember where your mouth has been. You're pretty unforgettable, no matter what you're doing.

When the door closed, I found myself alone, hard, sitting on the living room floor. My mind was reeling from the past 20 minutes, and I was unable to stand up for a while. I sat there thinking about what I had just seen and heard, and looking down the hallway at the closed door, behind which my wife was going to bed with her lover. It wasn't until I heard her moan -- through the door and down the length of the hallway -- that I was able to pull myself together enough to get to my feet.

I pulled off my pants and underwear, dragged a chair to the door, laid down a towel, spread Vaseline on my cock and sat down outside THEIR door to jerk off while they made love. As soon as I approached the door I heard the sound of Sally's pocket rocket, and when I sat down I heard Ted talking to my wife. I can never hear what he is saying, but I hear him talking to her, encouraging her, as she holds her vibrator on her clit. Her gasps and moans increased, then she went silent... then she came.

I heard my wife -- my partner for over 30 years, the mother of my children, the woman I love more than life itself -- orgasm in her lover's arms. There is no way to transcribe the sounds of her orgasm; all I can say is that she left no question in my mind that she had given herself to Ted and allowed him to guide her to the ultimate pleasure. I thought of all the times we were at home together, her using her vibrator and me sitting on the floor talking to her about sex with her lover, when she would say, "I wish Ted was here to get me over." Now he was here, and she was here, and I could only listen and play with myself as he "got her over."

I kept myself from cumming as I listened, and I thought about how pathetic I was to sit there and jerk off while another man made my wife cum. Even more powerful, I told myself that HE and SHE both felt that way, too. They knew I was right outside the door; they knew I could hear; they knew I was rubbing my penis while I listened; and yet, at that moment there was nothing in the world but her, and him, and... sex.

Her question echoed in my head: "Why don't you stop me? Why didn't you ever stop me?"

I rubbed my incredibly hard cock and knew I had answered correctly the second time: "Because I'm not enough of a man." I nearly came as I thought about her response: "No, you're not. I love you, but you're not."

Her aftershocks seemed to go on forever. Only the sound of Ted sucking in his breath made me realize that the focus had changed from her pleasure to his. I didn't know what they were doing -- what SHE was doing to him -- but I knew she was making him feel very, very good.

I sat outside the bedroom door as Ted's gasps turned into moans and his moans turned into cries of passion. I couldn't tell you whether they went on for five minutes or fifteen; all I know was that my wife turned him on and excited him until he couldn't hold back anymore. I sat there and rubbed while my wife made Ted cum, and there was no part of his orgasm which could have been mistaken for anything but intense, ultimate pleasure. I SAT THERE AND JERKED OFF WHILE MY WIFE MADE ANOTHER MAN CUM, and all I could think, as I strained to keep from cumming myself, was that this was... RIGHT. Sex was for him, and for her... and not for me. I felt it, and even behind the closed door I knew they felt it, too. We all knew that I'm not man enough for sex.

I thought they were done, but I was wrong. They weren't done... at least they weren't done with me.

Ted's cries had barely died down when I heard Sally call my name. I waited to see if she was going to say anything else -- that she wanted me to bring them a drink, for example -- but I didn't hear another word. Tentatively, I opened the bedroom door and asked what she wanted.

She didn't say anything, but what she wanted was clear: she wanted to show me what she was doing and what she had just done. As I opened the door I saw my wife -- my naked wife -- lying on top of Ted. Her legs were spread around his hips, his cock was in her pussy, and she was rocking back and forth, driving him deeper and deeper into her body.

The last time I had seen them, they were walking toward the bedroom together. The last time I saw Ted's cock, it was hard and pointing toward my wife's pussy as they walked. Now I saw them again: naked, in bed, with that same cock sliding in and out of her pussy as she fucked him.

I couldn't breathe. The scene said it all. Sally -- my wife, my loving wife -- called me in to show me that she was fucking Ted; to show me what she did to him that made him cry out as he came. She had showed me how she got him ready to fuck her, now she wanted to show me what fucking looked like.

I moved to the bottom of the bed to see... it. To see fucking. To see Ted's sex in my wife's sex. Then I moved back to the side of the bed to watch them kissing and caressing and sharing tender words as his cock gradually softened and slipped out of her. I saw it flop onto his leg and thought to myself that that was one of the most obscene things I've ever seen. And Sally wanted me to see it.

My wife wanted me to see her continuing to fuck him after he came, and she wanted me to see his spent cock -- the cock she made so incredibly hard just a little while ago -- flop out of her pussy, it's mission (emission?) accomplished. MY WIFE WANTED ME TO SEE THAT.

When he slipped out of her she kissed him and rolled off him, lying on her back beside him. She looked at me standing there, jerking my cock like I was trying to pull it off, and she spread her legs, draping her left leg over him. She laid there for a minute, giving me a view of her whole body - naked, open... for HIM. Then she said, "Put your finger in me -- ONE finger. I want you to feel how wet I am for him."

She never asked me to do that before. NEVER. Even when she was in bed with him, she had always drawn a physical line, a boundary, between me and them. In fact, the one time she reached out to hold my hand while she was cuddling with him stands out as one of the most erotic moments of my life... and that was just holding her HAND. But here she was, lying naked in front of me, with her naked lover pressed up against her side and her leg thrown across his body, asking me -- no, TELLING me -- to put my finger in her to see how wet she was for him.

If you've read the other chapters of my Diary, you know that this has been a central element of my cuckolding: long before Sally could verbalize any of her feelings for Ted or describe how he turns her on, we all knew that she has never needed any artificial lubrication for him to fuck her. And we all also knew that she was never able to fuck me without a generous application of Vaseline to my penis. Amazingly, and humiliatingly, even after she came with me her pussy would still be too dry for me to enter her -- or even slip my finger into her.

And now she wanted to show me how wet she was for HIM.

Back to the harsh reality of Ted's prostate problem: he doesn't actually ejaculate much these days. He says his orgasms still feel as good as they ever did (and it sure sounds like they do), but he longs for the "good old days" when he could hit the wall with his cum. I mention this only because what I felt when I touched my finger to Sally's pussy lips was mostly her... and she was WET. Based on my own experience I assumed I'd need to lick my finger to get it in, but I was wrong. My finger slid right in; she was wet on the outside and wet on the inside, and as I felt it I groaned and nearly came.

"Does it turn you on to see how wet I get for a real man?" my wife asked me with a combination of love and dominance. I started to answer, but Ted answered for me.

"I think it turns him on more to have his finger in your pussy after I came in you, than it would if he was trying to fuck you. Look at your husband's face -- the face of a cuckold."

Sally smiled and kissed him, then said, "Am I wet? Can you feel how wet he makes me?"

"Yes," I croaked. "You're wet. You're really wet."

"That's for HIM," she said, and kissed him again.

"Th- thank you for letting me feel you," I said, barely able to get the words out.

"I wanted you to see, to feel... to KNOW -- how a MAN makes me feel," she said. I had never heard her talk to me like this, and I looked to see if it was making her uncomfortable. All I saw was pleasure: pleasure in being in Ted's arms, pleasure kissing him as he continued to jerk and shake from the way she made him cum, and yes, pleasure in letting go and showing me how she felt about me as a man.

I looked in her eyes and saw love -- and disappointment. I am so many things to her, but now she made it clear that I'm not a man.

HE is.

She told me to take my finger out of her, and I obeyed. I stood there masturbating as they kissed and hugged and cuddled for I don't know how long. She caressed his arm and said, "I don't think I'm up for another round today; I hope you don't mind."

His answer came with a kiss. "Not all passion involves penetration. I'd just like to lie here with you and enjoy the feeling of your body next to mine."

She LOVED his response. Without a moment's hesitation she turned her head to look at me and said, "GO AWAY. NOW."

I mumbled something about being grateful to them for showing me sex, and I quickly backed out of their bedroom.

I closed the door and returned to my seat, beating off furiously as I thought about everything I had experienced. They stayed in bed for another half hour, then I heard Ted dressing to leave. I left the chair by the door and went back into the living room, where I continued to masturbate.

Ted emerged dressed, and sat down on the couch facing me. "Well?" he said.

I've long since gotten over my hesitation about jerking off in front of him after he's fucked my wife; what am I worried about, my self-esteem? So I sat there, naked, and stroked myself while my wife's lover sat and looked at me.

"I'm so ashamed," I groaned.

"Oh, I'm sure of that. So what was the most shameful part for you?" he asked, as calmly as if we were discussing the day's news.

"She hurt me, and she liked it. You laughed at me, and you liked it. You made each other feel good, and you both made me feel really, really bad... and you LIKED IT."

"You know, it's true," he said. "She's always sexual and sensual, but today she was playful, too. I have you to thank for that."

"Me?" I asked, with genuine surprise.

"Oh yes! You've shown her that she can enjoy hurting you while she enjoys pleasuring me, and today I think she did that. She had FUN hurting you today, and I KNOW she had fun fucking me!"

I kept myself from falling over the edge and cumming when he said that, but it was close. When I regained enough of my composure to speak again I grunted, "You laughed at me while she sucked your cock. Even when you were shaking from the feeling of her mouth on you, you talked to me and laughed at me. Is that how YOU feel about me, too?"

Ted thought for a minute. I could see him evaluating the so-called man sitting in front of him, playing with the cock my wife has rejected for his.

"I think we're all on the same page about you. You think you're a sexual loser, and so does your wife. And so do I.

"Thank you for bringing her to me. That's something you're good at. See you next time I fuck her."

And with that, he left.

I let Sally sleep for a while, then gently woke her when it was time to leave.

"Are you okay?" she asked as soon as she woke up.

"Yes, my love. I'm great."

"I hurt you today," she said tentatively.

"Yes, you did. And I'm so grateful to you for that. I know it wasn't easy, but it meant more to me than I can say."

"What did you like best?"

"I liked when you looked at me and hurt me," I confessed. "Ted just said that you were 'playful' today, and you had fun hurting me. I saw that, and I think it's true."

"It is true. I really had fun today -- all of it," she said more assertively.

"I told Ted that I was ashamed of myself, and he said he thought we were all on the same page about that," I said as I gently caressed her arm.

"I think he's right," she said.

Our anniversary is coming up soon, and with it comes my once-a-year mercy fuck. A few days after their date I asked Sally how she felt about it. "I'm dreading it," she said, "but I want to give that to you. I'll also be relieved when it's over for another year."

Then she said, "I love you and I'm so grateful to be married to you. I love so many things about you... just not sex." And with that, she hugged me and kissed me good-night.

We ARE on the same page.

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Comments welcome; flames cheerfully ignored.

Cuckold Paul