A Father's Son

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Remembering husband.
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FinJones
FinJones
25 Followers

As I am writing this now, my mixed emotions are starting to rise back up again. Those emotions I had never even dreamed. At least not until last Friday. The day I had both feared, and also waited. Waited with a fire of need burning inside me. Waited with an inexplicable desire towards the unspeakable act. The act of forbidden love. The act between two bodies, craving to be close to each other. The act of passion and lust. The act of in...well I guess at this point there is no shame of saying it, the act of incest. His hands all over my body. His gentle caress on my thighs. His warm breath...Ahhh. Oops, sorry about that. Got carried away for bit. As I was saying, last Friday was, I think at least I'd like it to be, a turning point in my life. But first, let me take you back in time for a second, ok?

My name is Julie, by the way. Forty two years of age. A mother of a son, Jason. And a widow of my late husband George. Oh, George. Even now my eyes start to wet, just thinking of him, and the memories I have. His death, after a long and painful period of cancer treatments, was the end of the world, to say at least, for both me and Jason. And last Friday came the fifth whole year without him. When I met George, he was 20 years old, tall and good looking young man with muscular body and short blonde hair. And without knowledge of better, he was a husband of any girls dreams. Passionate lover and a loving father. A hard working man who wanted to provide his family a decent living. He worked as a repairman for a sawmill, and loved what he did.

I accidentally bumped him in supermarket near my home. Contents of my purse flew all around the floor, and the gentleman he always was, he started to collect my things, after saying how sorry HE was for not looking ahead of HIMself. And when his brown eyes looked straight to mine, I was sold. I wanted to throw myself in his arms and tell him to carry me home with him. I know this sounds like what you can see in those stupid tv-shows, but sometimes life just surprises you totally. Like it have been doing to me, twice now. But no, I was too stunned to say anything like that to him, just mumbled my thank yous, maybe with a little...maybe with a blush on my face. I had already turned to continue my way when I heard his voice calling my first name. His voice... It alone made me feel I was melting, and the memory of it still gives me shivers. When I turned to look, he was holding my wallet, which in all the fuss had flown behind the shopping baskets and I didn't even had the brains to check if it was in my purse. He told me he had peeked my name from my drivers licence, and gave me my wallet back. And when he asked me if I would like to join him for a cup of coffee, there was no real choice to be made. One thing lead to another, and after fourteen months, we got married. And about four months after our wedding, I gave birth to our son, Jason.

Oh Jason, my darling baby boy Jason... He is his fathers son, no doubt about it. Since he learnt how to walk, he followed his father where ever he went. And when time passed by, and Jason grew older, nothing changed. When in his school was a theme day, when students were to spend a day with their parent, at their work, it was no surprise to find Jason sitting in his fathers car in the morning, heading for work. And even now, he still continues his fathers work at the mill. I am so proud of the man he have become. A hard working man, a caring son and... well, also something more than that. He lives on his own, about 20 minutes drive from me now. And though I said he was his fathers son, our relationship have been full of love and joy none the less. And lately, even more. Jason celebrated his twentieth birthday just a month ago, and now looking at him, he is almost a copy of his late father. His tall and muscular body is just like Georges, his hair being slightly darker than his fathers. And when I look at his fathers browns eyes he has, I just can't stop thinking him as a younger picture of his father. His expressions. His manners. His voice. Oh, God... His voice... Everything in him reminds me of my dear George.

After my husbands funeral, my relationship with my son has grown even closer. Since I couldn't even bear the thought of sharing my life, or even my bed, with anyone else than George, I have not been in a single actual date after he passed away. So most of my free time I spend at home. I said I haven't been in actual date, not because I haven't been out with a man, but because the lack of a romantic purpose. Since my husbands funeral, Jason had taken pretty much his fathers place, taking me out to dinner or to a movie. Sometimes he brings me flowers, and when I ask for a reason, he usually says that just because he knows I like flowers, and he wants to see me happy. Every once in a while he calls me to his place, where he has cooked dinner for us. We do basically everything that a loving couple does. We just don't have sex. Or at least we didn't, until last Friday evening.

The day itself was nothing out of ordinary, we were both at work and we had agreed to meet at my place for dinner at seven. My work is pretty boring, nothing much to talk about. I work as a cashier in a small restaurant, but a job is a job and it gives the salary I need for my life. I'm not too happy about it, but too lazy to do anything for it. So it is what it is. But anyway, I got home from work about four-thirty and took a long and enjoyable shower. You know what I mean. I had plenty of time to prepare our dinner and by the time my son got here, I had everything ready. The food was on the dining room table, a bottle of red wine opened and a candle flickering in otherwise dim evening light. Now there is nothing unusual for us to spend Friday evening together and have a dinner, but normally there is no more wine than there are candles. These were for the days special meaning for us, remembering George. We had made it to a custom habit and it basically every time ended me falling asleep, my head resting on Jason's shoulder or chest and with tears running down my cheeks. But not this year.

Now I may have to tell you something at this point. Like I said earlier, before last Friday nothing sexual happened between me and Jason. I hate to say, but not because I wouldn't have wanted, but because he is my son and that is what he is supposed to be. Nothing more. But I had dreamed. And I had fantasized. That´s right. I admit it, I had fantasized of having sex with my handsome son. Many times, many nights after our dinners, his fingers were inside me, rocking me into a mind blowing orgasm and cradling me to a restful sleep. At least in my imagination. I know, that's not something a mother should do. A mother should not have sexual fantasies about her son. That is just wrong, immoral, and not to mention, illegal. But what can I say? It wasn't like I didn't try to control those feelings. Oh believe me, I did. I tried my everything to push those dirty thoughts out from my head, but they just kept coming back. And spending so much time with him didn't help much either. Or that sometimes, mostly at his place, when I saw him after his shower, wearing just a towel around his waist. His almost naked body was just like Georges was at his age.

Now I know I have said earlier, that nothing sexual happened before last Friday. I had however, noticed a slight change in Jason's behavior. It started about six months ago, with a little things. I kept noticing his eyes wandering around my body, focusing to certain areas for a bit too long, for example. Sometimes his hand touched my bare thigh, sometimes my tit, by accident of course. But the blushing after told me something else. Like I said, Jason is a loving and caring son so it wasn't that unusual either for him to give me a foot massage. My work kills my feet and every now and then Jason gives them much wanted attention. But some time ago, I noticed he had a hard on in his pants and I poked it with my heel while Jason was massaging my feet. And it gave him an instant change of color on his face and an urgent need to excuse himself for a leak. Or when he kisses my cheek goodbye, it takes a bit longer than it used to before. Little things. And I enjoyed them. Oh God... It gave my fantasies a new rush and how I wished I had the courage to do something else than fantasizing about it.

I had, oh how I had tried to ask Jason why he has so much time for his mother. Now he moved out from home early, he was only seventeen. And he was deeply in love with his girlfriend and wanted to live with her. And after couple of long conversations, I decided to let him go. But the happiness didn't last long, and after one year Jason was looking for a place of his own. I offered him his old room, but he said he wanted to be independent and live on his own. He had a job already and he could easily provide everything he needed for himself. Maybe not everything he wanted, but needed. He was like a normal young man is, dating and partying every now and then, having fun life all and all. His love life didn't thrive though, and the reason for that he told me last Friday as well. He had been diagnosed infertility at the age of eighteen, which means he can't have babies. And when he was starting a relationship with a girl and his condition came of subject, it was always too big of a let down for young girls. And he understood it well. But was too ashamed to tell me before. So when he had very little of interest towards dating, because of in some way understandable self-hatred, he was more than happy to spend his free time with me. And to be honest, I did not mind. I enjoy his company, I always have and I have to say he is pretty good cook too, so it's always a pleasure to visit him for a meal.

But anyway, like I said I had noticed the change in his behavior and, I'm not sure if it was intentional at first, but since then I started to act a bit more provocatively in his presence. Slightly more revealing clothing, some effort on make up, little gestures here and there, little stuff. I guess some might call it flirting or something, but at some point it went far enough for some people to call it a mating call. Though, every time the atmosphere went from casual to not casual, and he realized what I was doing, the game was over. Now we have used to telling dirty jokes to each other, and that's nothing special. But we were still mother and son. And by now, I guess you might want to know how it all happened, right? So, he came to my place, kissed my cheek a bit too long for a normal son-mother kiss, and softly caressed my arm. Nothing he hadn't done before. We ate, we drank the wine and we talked. And at some point I felt him taking my hands in his, without any gestures, while I was telling him something. He just looked me in the eyes, listened what I had to say, and took a hold on my hands. Just like a loving partner would do. And those eyes made me melt again. After that moment, everything changed. I try to recall in every little detail, because I know that's what you like...

When he took a hold from my hands, my heart almost jumped. I assumed he would let it go after a while but instead he started a gentle, soft caress on the to of my hand with his thumb. My pulse was definitely rising when I heard Jason's breathing having a bit heavier tone. I was nervous as hell and wasn't really expecting this from him. He started to talk and I listened without hearing a word he said. My stomach was full of butterflies when I saw a little glimpse in Jason's eyes. Or at least I thought so. He kept speaking and I kept drooling. Or so it felt at least. My mind got encouraged and I slowly started to move my feet towards him. I reached, and I reached until my toes touched his calve. And though he still kept speaking and never breaking the eye contact, I saw he definitely got shivers. I raised my feet and slightly swept his inner thigh and that made him flinch. His eyes got wider and he took his hands away. I thought it was game over again and was preparing myself for his excuse but it never came. Instead, maybe Jason just needed couple seconds to process it, and after a bit awkward silence, he asked if I wanted a foot massage. And the tone in his voice. Oh, how it made me want him. I was sopping wet and afraid how he might react when he sees it. Because he was definitely going to see it. Jason hasn't lately been so subtle with his checking up on me, and when he gives me foot massage, his eyes take trips to places, where a sons shouldn't.

I told him to sit on the couch while I put the movie on. It was custom after dinner that we watch a movie. Jason told me to take comfortable position and started his work with my feet. It felt heavenly, like always, but I couldn't stop thinking, if there was a bit more sensuous touch than normal. At least his hands seemed to wander a bit more than usual. Jason was working me left calve when I thought to continue our little game. I started to bend my right knee slowly to feel his cock, but remembered how it last time made him run. It wasn't the case this time, he continued his work but the audible sigh told me that tonight the game could go on. So I started to slowly rub my heel against his hard member and saw how his eyes closed. I kept my slow teasing on and at some point I felt his hands stop moving and when I looked I saw Jason taking a deep breath, holding it in for a while, and slowly, but audibly exhaling. I thought he was enjoying the situation and when switched to massage my right foot, my left continued the work on his lap what was interrupted.

I put some more pressure to my heel and started moving it back and forth on his cock.

"Mom," Jason said with a tremble in his voice, "are we really going to do this?"

I moved my right index finger to my lips like I was biting it nervously. "Aren't you?"

"We shouldn't" he said with low voice after a while. "You're my mom and...and we are not supposed to."

"Jason," I said. "We are both adults, aren't we?"

"You know it's not that mom. It's just..."

I cut him before he could continue.

"And do you love me?"

"You know I do mom. And I've..."

Again I cut his talk.

"And we are both free but alone if I am correct?"

Jason stopped the massage, and the escape reaction was again rising to surface.

"Yes, we are. What´s your point?"

"My point is..."

I slowly climbed to straddle him and tangled my hands around his neck and looked him in his slightly scared eyes.

"Jason, could you ever think of me as something more than just your mother?"

I could almost hear his heart beating faster. I wasn't done yet.

"Think about this honey," I said "we both are in a bit odd situation here. You know my thoughts after your father died. And your condition is what it is and I know how you feel about it. We basically act like married couple without the physical closeness. And lets face it, we both are quite horny if I'm not mistaken."

"Mom," Jason started. "I've been thinking this lately. Actually I have been thinking this a lot the last couple of months. Its just..."

"I know honey", I purred, "but hear me out."

Jason's face went serious and he pulled my hands from his neck. "No mom. I don't think you do," he started, without a drop of hesitation.

"You think, that I think that this is all wrong and how there is a line what mother and son should never cross. But it's not that. In my mind I have kind of already crossed that line and the battle with my conscience is already in the past. It's just..."

"What are you saying honey?" I asked with genuine curiosity.

"Look, mom. I think we would both agree, that the tension between us has been quite obvious. And I can't...shit. I can't really deny it, I have been thinking you a lot. But not as my mother. And..."

"And what honey?" His gaze felt down like he was ashamed of what he was saying and with sound of being almost a whisper, he continued.

"I have been thinking of what dad would say to all this..."

When I heard him saying that, my eyes started to water and I tangled my hands again around his neck and leaned over to take him in to a hug. We both sobbed there for a moment and when I finally got myself back together, still holding his neck I started to tell him how I thought George might think.

"With over fifteen years of experience, I might have an idea how your father would feel about this. After thinking this through, he would approve. And just because seeing us happy would make him happy. I'd like to think that if he is watching us now somewhere, he would be smiling. I know it's not going to be easy and we need to be careful with this, but we'll figure it out eventually. I love you Jason and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I know this sounds weird, and I'm scared you might think differently of me after this, but somehow I now feel that George never really left me. I see so much him in you and in everything you do, that I sometimes think that you are George. Now don't get me wrong. I love you, you Jason. Not the image of your father. Please don't think me as some kind of a sick and twisted pervert, please honey."

By the time I had finished, tears ran wild down my cheeks. But when I felt his palms against my cheeks, and his thumbs wiping my messy make-up off, I felt the rush of passion and lust go straight through my body. And maybe it went through Jason as well, because before I could even realize, his lips were pressed against mine and his tongue was making its way to my mouth, to look for mine. Mmmhh. It was a mix of passion, love, carnal lust, fear of the concequences what might follow, and it all blended to a long moment of passionate kissing.

When I felt his hands lifting my shirt up, I instinctively raised my arms and let my shirt go off. It took only couple of seconds for him to unclasp my bra and soon my tits were the target of his passion. I basically ripped his shirt off to see that handsome young body of his and started to feel his chest and arms. I felt his mouth on my erect nipple, his tongue making circles around it. His teeth gently biting it. Oh God, how it made me wet and horny. I squirmed and moaned under his touch and the feeling was unbelievable. The feeling from the touch of a man, a man I deeply loved. My son Jason.

With trebling hands I unbuckled his jeans and he begun to open my button as well. We stood and and with a haste we removed the rest of our clothing, standing naked in front of each other. His beautiful cock pointed directly to me and when I laid my hand on it, it twitched. The pre cum, oozing from its tip looked delicious and I couldn't wait to taste it. I dropped to my knees and licked the drop from his cock and the taste with the feeling almost made me cum already. I was so excited when I heard Jason's sexy voice, moaning for me to suck his cock. Mmmm, God, how I wanted his big, lovely cock in my mouth. I tried to push my head to take all of its length inside, but couldn't do it at first. Little by little I relaxed my throat, and when I felt my nose pressing his crotch, I felt proud, deep-throating my own son. Soon I heard him saying, that he was going to cum, and it only made me to go faster, sucking and licking his beautiful penis. Jason started to groan and then I felt his cum, spurting inside my mouth. I felt his hand on the back of my head, but he didn't need to push me deeper. I wanted every drop of his sweet cum and sucked and swallowed it all with pleasure. He told me how he loved me and how that had been amazing, the best blowjob he ever had.

I was still on my knees in front of my son, embracing the taste of his cum in my mouth, when I felt his hands helping urging up and guiding me to sit. He placed his hands on my knees, pushing them apart to open the way to my sopping wet pussy. Then I felt his lips, softly kissing my inner thigh, making their way towards my mound, I could only whimper and moan in excitement. I wanted him to eat my pussy so bad, but he kept teasing me for a long time, gently caressing and kissing his way to my waiting sex. And when I finally felt his tongue, licking all the way to my clit, I was shaking and trashing with my soon to come orgasm. He pushed his finger inside my warm hole and started to work my clit with his tongue. I begged him not to stop and when he started to fuck my pussy with his finger, faster and harder, my body gave up and my climax came with me screaming from pleasure. I thought my climax would never end when his finger kept pumping in and out, but finally I was so worn out that I almost collapsed and I had to just lie down for a moment to catch my breath.

FinJones
FinJones
25 Followers
12