A Grammar-School Boy Looks Back

My reminiscences to date have all been of my first year at Bishop's. In later years as I progressed through the school I was, alas, a regular fixture on Basher's list of flagellants. For one reason or another I did not seem to be able to keep myself out of trouble and so I was a regular visitor to the Headmaster's study. From the third year onwards, we were at least spared the indignity of kneeling on that footstool and had to bend across the back of the chair to give him access to our arses. And as time passed, I suppose I just came to accept that being caned was part and parcel of my school life. But now let me fast forward now fast forward a few years to the time I was fifteen years old.

I really cannot now remember exactly why on this occasion I found myself bent over a chair in Basher's study waiting for him to apply a little of his TLC to my backside yet again. Suddenly, before Basher had given me the first stroke, a loud knock came at the door; from my supine position over the chair, I saw the door flung violently open and the hated sports master, Mr. Reeves, entered with two lower sixth-formers in tow. "Headmaster, please excuse this unannounced interruption, but I felt that you would wish to deal with these two delinquents immediately." Basher told me to get up from over the chair and stand to attention against the wall. Mr Reeves then went on: "Headmaster, the situation is that I came across this pair, Thompson and Ibbotson, during the afternoon break, hidden in the lavatories and smoking; and knowing your strict views on smoking and your wish to stamp out his pernicious habit, I felt that you would wish to deal with them immediately."

Basher looked beadily at the two lads, who realised that they were now in for the high jump and said: "You are both aware, are you not, that smoking is strictly forbidden in this school and that to break this rule as you two have just done, leads to the most severe of punishments. Both of you take of your trousers and under pants for I intend to give you both a beating which you will long remember. I will not tolerate senior boys breaking this no-smoking rule which must remain inviolate. As for you, Robertson, well you can stay there and observe what happens to boys who break the no-smoking rule; let it be an example to you of what you can expect from me if you yourself are ever caught smoking; and you can pass on your experiences of this afternoon to your classmates. As you can all see, my motto is to strike whilst the iron is hot: and believe me, you two smokers, by the time I have finished with you, your backsides will be red-hot."

The two lads, ashen faced, slowly obeyed the Headmaster and divested themselves of their lower garments. Completely embarrassed to be standing there with their nether anatomy naked, they instinctively cupped their hands over their genitals in a vain attempt to retain a little modest dignity. "Thompson: you will be first: approach the chair, boy, and bend across the back; stick your bottom well into the air boy, for that is the part of your anatomy which is scheduled to play and leading role in the proceedings. You will each receive twelve strokes of the cane, but I shall administer them in two doses of six each; after the first six strokes you, Thompson, will make way for your partner in crime, who will then receive his first six cuts. Then we shall repeat the process, by which time I hope that both of you will realise that breaking the rules does not pay. And make no mistake; if either of you is ever again caught smoking in the school, I shall have no hesitation in birching you. Now Thompson, if you please, get on with it and bend across the chair and keep perfectly still. If I have any resistance from you at all, then Mr. Reeves will have the doubtful pleasure of holding you down."

So there it was; now I knew for sure; Basher did sometimes thrash lads on the bare and he did also, apparently use the dreaded birch. As Basher applied the cane to Thompson's naked arse, I felt my cock rising slowly until I was suddenly aware that I had a complete erection; I then saw that Ibbotson, awaiting his turn to be beaten, had the same and judging from the bulge in Mr. Reeves's crotch, he too was erotically aroused by the proceedings. I gazed closely as I dared at the Headmaster's crotch, but he showed no signs of any degree of sexual arousal provoked by what he was doing; and what he was doing was truly horrific. The cane came down at great speed and with great force and landed with a sharp crack on the awaiting buttocks. Basher was a consummate expert at his job, and laid on stroke after vicious stroke, all parallel to each other and each of them raising a painful looking, reddish-blue welt across Thompson's arse. Both Thompson and Ibbotson in turn screamed out in pain as stroke followed stroke; and who could blame them as the Headmaster did not spare the rod that afternoon.

To make matters worse, of course, the fact that Basher had decided to give each lad two sets of six cuts, rather than getting the whole thing over with at one go, increased their agony. Thompson stood there with his hands on his head whilst Ibbotson took his first six, in the knowledge that in a few minutes time he would again be stretched across that same chair, taking another six, swingeing cuts of the cane across his arse. By the time Basher had finished with the two lads, both of them were crying profusely; and little wonder, for each lad was now sporting a truly well-roasted arse. "Well boys, let that be a lesson to you. Now, get your clothes back on and get out of here."

And then turning to me, he said: "Well Robertson; don't think I have forgotten you. Let what you have just seen act as an example to you of what happens to boys who break the no-smoking rule. Now, get yourself across that chair again lad and let's get on with it; and thank your lucky stars that I am allowing you to keep your trousers on this time."

Let me tell you, having watched what had just happened to Thompson and Ibbotson, I was truly grateful for this small mercy, for a bare arse whacking from Basher was really something to be feared. But don't think that Basher was tired by his strenuous efforts on the other two lads, for he managed to leave me with a six stroke arse which was still which was still excruciatingly painful even with my pants to protect me.

You will have noticed that on this occasion I first mentioned the sexual arousal conditioned by watching other lads get beaten, As boys approach puberty, this phenomenon becomes more and more evident and most lads take considerable, malicious pleasure or Schadenfreude in hearing about, or observing as I had just done, their classmates get whacked. What is it inside us that awakens this feeling? I do not know; but it and more pronounced as boys approach puberty and as Mr. Reeves's bulging crotch had shown me, it still continues into adulthood. So it is not uncommon to see a whole class of lads, watching one of their number take a beating, all sporting rock-hard erections, which can, at times, be very embarrassing.

Sex was a subject about which we, as school boys, in the latter half of the 1940s, knew very little. It was not a matter which was much discussed either among ourselves let alone at home with parents; sex was a subject which was studiously avoided; it seemed still to be regarded as a sin by many people even though it was vital to the propagation the race; but it was ignored; swept under the carpet and never ever discussed in public. To all intents and purposes, as far as we boys were concerned, sex did not exist. But it did! As we got older, our curiosity our desire to know more grew and as with most things, where there's a will there's a way; so little by little we sort of cobbled together a picture of what sex was all about. And it was sex which got me the biggest thrashing of my life from Basher. It was in my final year in the upper sixth when it happened.

Ronald Arnold Sullivan, Ras as he was called by all his schoolmates in the sixth, had not been one of my close friends until we were thrown together in the sixth form. He and I were from the same year, but until now, I had been in the A stream and he in the B; so although we knew one another casually, we were not close friends. But all that changed when we entered the sixth form. Typically what happened was that aged sixteen all the boys of the fifth form sat the School Certificate Examination: the precursor of what became the GCSE. At the end of the school year, roughly half the boys would then leave aged 16 to seek some form of employment in the town. The remainder, now reduced to a total of some thirty boys in all, combined from both A and B streams, were then divided between the arts and the science/mathematics sixths. The idea was then that we should take the Higher School Certificate exam, the passport to university entrance and the brighter lads among us, which included both Ras and me, would also try for a place at Oxford or Cambridge via their then additional and more difficult exams; and that was how Ras and I came together in the lower sixth science.

In spite of his Irish name, there was really nothing Celtic about Ras at all; he was an amazingly handsome dark-blond young man about the same height as me and from the moment we were in the science sixth together, we got on like a house on fire. One the things I had realised as I came up through the fifth form and talk among my classmates often centred around girls, was that I was not particularly interested in the female sex myself. This did not bother me unduly as the concept of homosexuality had never crossed mind; in fact, looking back on it now, I don't think I knew then what a homosexual was. And the idea that men could have a sexual relationship with another man was totally unknown to me. All I knew was that I liked Ras tremendously: a liking which was clearly reciprocated.

Ras was from as low a working-class background as me; he lived alone with his widowed mother in a small house not all that for from us. His father had been killed in the D-Day landings during the war and his mother now worked six days a week, from eight to six each day on a stall in the local covered market to support their very modest level of living. Gradually over that first year in the lower sixth he and I became ever closer; we were both very keen members of the cross-country running team, an activity which we both enjoyed tremendously and what with showering after gym twice a week and after the runs we regularly saw each other naked. So we both knew that the other was well equipped in the nether regions, a fact that we never ever so far discussed or even mentioned. But I confess that the more I saw of Ras, the more I found myself lusting after him. Our knowledge of sex was limited and our knowledge of homosexual sex was nil; yet somehow or other, quite unspoken as yet, I think that we both knew that we wanted to get ever closer together.

But matters did not go any further until we were both in our final year at school and now aged eighteen, when the sexual urge which every young man man feels at that age, led Ras and me to our first tentative attempt at male-male sex. I think we were the only pair in the combined upper sixth forms of some thirty boys in all, to have had any sort of physical relationship with one another at all; but as such matters were not openly discussed in those days, I could not swear to it. Our first coupling was at Ras's house, where he had invited me to spend the Saturday with him; we had the place to ourselves as his mother was working in the market until five. Ostensibly we were supposed to look over some of our weekend homework together, but this was rapidly abandoned as for the first time we found ourselves truly alone and were able to allow our mutual attraction for each other to take over with no inhibitions.

We rapidly gravitated to Ras's bedroom, where without speaking a single word we both stripped off our clothes as it was clear that we each wanted the other's body. How we both knew what to do, I have no idea, as until this moment our feelings for one another had never been voiced; but we immediately fell into each other's arms on Ras's bed. I started to kiss him, first on the mouth and face and then I descended down his body giving one kiss after the other to his naked skin until I finally took the head of his cock into my mouth and started to suck him off. By this time I had realised that I wanted to unite our two bodies sexually and my own cock, which I had already realised had a mind of its own, was telling me what it wanted as I was already exuding what I suppose today would be called pre-cum; in a word I really did have the hots for Ras

Ras clearly wanted me to have sex with him as he rolled over and spread his legs to give me access to his anus. Lord only knows how we both knew what we were supposed to do; or I suppose to be more correct, how we knew what we were supposed not to do; but somehow we did and I very quickly pushed the tip of my own stiff cock against what I now know to be called his anal sphincter: the only place of access a male has allowing another male to penetrate him. Ras moaned with pleasure as I gently thrust my stick against his anal opening and urged me to force myself into him; when his muscle finally yielded and allowed me to enter him I gently thrust my full length erection of some even inches (no exaggerating!) into his rectum. Ras let out a sharp cry of pain as I touched what I suppose must have been his prostate, but after that all went smoothly and for me it was an utterly heavenly experience to unite myself physically with the man I had come to adore.

Then quite naturally, I began to pump my cock in and out of Ras; it seemed the most natural thing in the world to do; and I suppose it was. No one had told either of us what to do and we had not even discussed together the act we were now engaged in; it just happened most naturally through the deep, hitherto unspoken, mutual attraction that we clearly each felt. I suppose it is very simply that the act of copulation, even homosexual copulation, is the most natural thing in the world and needs no formal instruction.

I would like to think that this first time we had sexual intercourse together was perfect for both of us. Certainly it was for me as I very rapidly reached orgasm and shot a huge load of creamy sperm into Ras's rectum. Ras meanwhile furiously jerked himself off and achieved same effect for himself. It was only much later in life as confirmed practising homosexual which I became, that I learned the finer points of sex with my partner: that ability to hold myself back until I was sure that I could bring my partner to his climax at the same time as my own.

That first coupling between Ras and me paved the way to a regular sex life together which lasted for the entire final year at school. Every Saturday, we would spend several hours in mutual sexual gratification. As it turned out, Ras did not wish to fuck me but was content just to let me fuck him. I learned later that I was what was known as a top and he a bottom. I did not mind at all at first but I to say to say that I became curious and wondered how it would feel to let another man penetrate me; but that pleasure was not to be until I had left school and was at university in Cambridge. Many people would have called what Ras and I did together an act of buggery between a pair of queers, as we were then called by the general public; the word "gay" then still had its original meaning and was not used in a sexual context at all. But to my mind our coupling was an act of true love. For Ras and me, our coming together was exactly as I imagine the first love a boy has for a girl. It starts off with an intense mutual feeling of affection and then gently fades away with time as each party realises that this is not for them. And so it was with Ras and me; our passion for each other lasted through the final, year at school but when we finally left, we each went our separate ways.

But now I must come to the utterly horrible event which overtook Ras and me, thanks to our sexual activity and, I might add essentially due to our own stupidity; so at the end of the day, we had no one to thank but ourselves for what happened to us: that fact did not, however, make it less painful. What happened was this. It was towards the end of the final summer term at the end of which we would be leaving the school for ever. I had obtained a place at Cambridge to read chemistry, whilst Ras was going to the "other place" to read physics; and so the two of us were well set to continue with our careers at England's two best universities. Over the year our sexual; activity had become ever more intense; it was as if we both realised, which, though unspoken, I suppose we did, that on leaving Bishop's there would be an inevitable break in our relationship. And so in this "make hay whilst the sunshine" mood, we snatched every opportunity - let me put it at its crudest - to fuck.

It was late one Friday afternoon, when we in the science sixth had two free periods, that Ras and I decided to go for quick run together. Well when we got back we went straight to the showers and it was there looking at Ras naked under the running water that I simply could not resist him. So I grabbed him, shafted him with my ever ready erection and proceeded to give him a truly hard fuck with the pair of us standing there under the stream of hot water. I might add that Ras put up no resistance to my action and we were deeply engaged in gratifying one another when a loud voice said: "What on earth are you two boys doing there; stop what you are doing immediately; dry yourselves off and get dressed for you two are going straight to the Headmaster."

As you have probably guessed, it was none other than the hated Mr Reeves, the PT instructor, who had chanced by the showers and caught us in the act. I cursed myself for my stupidity in not exercising greater control over my feelings; had I had the sense I was born with then I would have realised that even though Ras and I were alone, the showers were open to anyone passing by, which is exactly what had happened; and of all people who might have found us "at it" Mr Reeves was easily the worst, for with the bit now between his teeth he clearly intended to make the pair of us jump through the hoop; we had played with fire and had got seriously burned; but just how seriously, neither of us could ever have imagined.

Basher Barton was in his study; it was approaching four thirty, the time when the school-day ended. Resplendent in his gown and with that ridiculous monocle in his eye, Basher listened to what Mr. Reeves had to say, before turning his attention to us: "As you both know, there are two cardinal sins which boys can commit in this establishment, both of which attract very severe punishments. The first of these is, of course, smoking, which is strictly forbidden; regularly each term I find have to correct several boys who have, nevertheless, decided to break this rule and have been caught smoking on the school premises; Needless to say such boys leave this study with very, very sore bottoms; very sore indeed. In fact, I seem to remember, Robertson, that on one occasion you watched me correct two boys whom Mr. Reeves, with his customary vigilance had just caught smoking in the lavatories."

"But the second sin, which is infinitely more serious, is what Mr, Reeves found you two boys engaged in this afternoon in the showers. Are you aware that sexual acts between men are strictly forbidden, not only in this school, but also by the laws of this country? I can hardly bring myself to say the word which is used to described what you two were doing but I feel I must; you two boys were caught indulging in an act of the most unnatural behaviour: an act which is legally referred to as "buggery". Are you aware that if the police were to learn of your liaison, then you could both be gaoled for several years? However, the police will not learn about what has happened today, as I intend to deal with the matter myself; I shall nip this affair in the bud before it goes any further."