A Guilty Pleasure

It had been nearly two years since I had seen my youngest niece, Lisa. I had been working oversees on and off and owing to commitments there couldn't get to her eighteenth. I tried to rearrange matters at work, but I never quite managed it. So, it was with an amazed look on my face that I laid eyes on her again a couple of weeks ago, just after her nineteenth birthday. It was just meant to be a warm, family reunion. However, something happened, which if I merely think about leaves my spine tingling. I've also been left with pangs of guilt, but expect I will come to terms with these in time. Writing about it has also afforded me a degree of catharsis.

I had been in Cyprus for fourteen months on my latest contract and was now back in blighty for a year at least. My sister had invited me to her house a couple of weeks earlier by text and I was looking forward to seeing her and Lisa. I had kept in touch with Katrina my sister and Lisa on the internet, but I was full of excitement. I arrived at her house on a Friday with my overnight bag - a small rucksack for my two nights stay. Lisa opened the door. I knew it was her, but I seriously barely recognised her. Gone was the slightly sweet, startled expression she used to have. She was such a shy girl when she was growing up. I saw quite a lot of Lisa in her younger years and would often look after her when my sister wanted the odd night out. Katrina was always a doting mother, but needed a break now and again. My so-called brother-in-law had disappeared off the scene years ago, when Lisa was a toddler, so it was left for me to help out whenever I could.

I put my arms out and gave her a great big hug on the doorstep. She had certainly filled out. I could tell that straight away. She was never skinny, but now...

I guess even as my niece I sort of checked her out innocently. I mean she had gone from not a lot up top, from what I remember, to a 36DD. She was wearing a woollen top and cut-off faded denim shorts. She was stunning and really curvy. At the time I just thought 'phew!' and then went to find my sister. I had brought loads of goodies. Chocolates in the main, because I knew they were both chocoholics. I can hardly say how great it was to be back in my home town and be reunited with the two members of my family that have always given me undying love and affection and wanted nothing in return.

'You hungry Alex.' Asked Katrina when I'd been there for a few minutes.

'Not especially, but I could murder a beer.'

'I've got some Stella in specially, I know how you love it!'

'Ah, I want a Stella!' Said Lisa suddenly appearing in the kitchen and poking me in the back.

I turned round and she suddenly gave me a very serious look, which I found hard to explain. I mean you get certain looks from certain people and you know what they're thinking. Something in her look puzzled me.

'Does it still taste good now it's legal?' I asked

'Oh yeah, but it's been legal for over a year!'

'I'm so sorry I missed your eighteenth Lisa.'

'I know don't worry about it.'

She turned to me and kissed me on the cheek. Then she just gave me the biggest hug in the world. It took me by surprise. It was like she was holding on to me for dear life. When she let go I had to ask her what it was in aid of.

'Oh I just missed you so much.'

She dropped the uncle prefix years earlier at my request, as I insisted it made me sound old. I'm not a naturally avuncular person, just very loving towards my family - when I'm there.

I chatted to my niece like we had never been apart. She had got good A level grades at college and was looking forward to Uni. I wondered if she had considered a gap year, but it seemed she was in an academic frame of mind and had got a place at Durham to do mathematics of all things. I knew she was bright, but she had grown into quite a boffin it seems. As we caught up with things in the kitchen I couldn't help but notice again how gorgeous she was and what a wonderful young woman she had grown into. She has a lovely infectious laugh and is just so effervescent. Her transition to adulthood had given her a certain vibrancy and enchanting quality, bordering on intoxication. I found myself looking into her eyes and lowering my gaze to her amazing boobs far too often. Niece or no niece, I am a man, but my Lisa!? I felt uneasy and this was made a million times worse as I gradually started to get an erection as we stood there in conversation. If I had gone a little red, then Lisa had been too polite to mention it. It was just the start of one and I managed to suppress it.

When our conversation had reached a natural break, I made some excuse to go to my room to gather my thoughts. She was just so beautiful. Her sandy brown hair, half way down her back, swished this way and that when she walked. Her bottom, pert and full and of course those amazing breasts. I had this almost overwhelming desire to touch them and that's what had made me start to get hard. I couldn't understand why I had these feelings for my niece. Was it because I hadn't been there to watch her grow up in her late teens? Whatever it was I had to block it out. Maybe when I had been there a few hours I would settle down and these feelings would subside.

I went back downstairs. It was nearly five o'clock and whatever Katrina had on the go in the kitchen, it smelt delicious. She's a good cook and always manages to pack tons of flavour in her food.

'Smells good Sis.'

'Oh it's just a little something I concocted. Hope you like it.'

'I'm sure. Where's Lisa?'

'Just gone to see Beth, one of her friends from college.'

'Oh right. How have you been then, it's been difficult being away for so long this time, I've missed you.'

'I know, but you're here now.'

'Lisa been OK?'

'As good as gold Alex. She helps me round the house and everything. Jenny was always out partying at her age.'

'Yeah I remember, she's made up for it though. I'll go down and see her, when she's back from France.'

My elder niece Jennifer is 26 and has opened her own hairdressers in London. I would catch up with her at some point, but on this occasion she was on holiday with her husband.

'I've told Lisa to change out of those raggy old shorts for dinner.'

'Oh she's OK.'

'I know, but you're here and she should make an effort.'

'OK, well you're the boss.'

I heard Lisa come back and after slamming the front door went straight up stairs. I got myself another beer and amused myself with a book in the living room. Any intentions I had of putting inappropriate thoughts about Lisa to the back of my mind were cut short when she appeared a few minutes later dressed as I can only describe as hot and provocative. Not intentionally provocative I'm certain, but to a 40 year old man, possibly in mid-life crisis who has been in Cyprus for two years with one brief liaison - she looked hot. She had a white top and a rather tight lilac cardigan, which was absolutely moulded around her incredible bust. Below she wore what had to be the tightest black leggings I have ever seen. The effect of the whole thing was overwhelming. I think I just stood their open-mouthed for several seconds.

'You look nice.' I said rather nervously I think.

'Thank you. Are you OK Alex?'

'Yes, sorry, just that...'

'Just what?'

'You're so beautiful Lisa.'

'Awww thank you.'

I think she caught me looking down at the bulge of her mons pubis, which was almost distastefully obvious and yet delightfully sexual. I felt sort of prickly all over. I could feel my pulse was a little too fast. I had to accept it. I fancied my niece like crazy. She gave me a lovely warm smile and showed me a few of her drawings that she had done of her horse. Lisa had ridden ponies and then her horse since she was about seven and was also a talented artist, particularly with pencil. I was beginning to shiver nervously just standing next to her.

'Are you sure you're OK?' She asked, clearly aware that I wasn't.

'Yes,' I lied.

Before anything else could be said, we were called through by Katrina to get to the table in the conservatory. Lisa looked at me imploringly. I couldn't talk about it. It was easier at dinner with Katrina there and I was able to regale them with my various tales from Europe and my time on Cyprus, which had had its moments, including a shark fishing adventure and running out of the way of a low-flying helicopter that almost crashed. It was great to see the look on their faces and though I say it again, so good to be home. All the time though I felt myself looking at Lisa. Because I was sat next to my sister she wouldn't have noticed. Katrina went to fetch the pudding, which was her homemade cheesecake.

Lisa looked at me earnestly when we were alone and put her hand on mine.

'You're shocked to see me grown up aren't you?'

'Yes.' I said, suddenly feeling a little choked at her empathy.

'It's OK.'

'It isn't OK though. I'm terrible.'

She looked taken aback.

'Why?'

I didn't know what to say. Before I could answer my sister came back with the dessert. We finished the meal with coffee and no more was said of our issue between me and Lisa. We watched a bit of television and Katrina went for a bath and then declared she was having an early night, leaving me and Lisa alone. We sat quietly for a minute as I perused the TV magazine and Lisa got up saying she wouldn't be long and shot upstairs. She returned about three minutes later in a plush purple dressing gown. Even though it was quite big and baggy I could see her boobs jiggle as she sat down beside me. She sat up with a cushion between her arms as girls do and asked me outright what the problem was.

'Come on Alex what's the matter, you've not been yourself now and again today. It's like you're mostly OK, but I can tell there's a problem and I think it's me.'

'Oh Lisa, how can it be you?'

'I can sense it. I know.'

'What do you know babe?'

'Ah you've not called me that since I was fifteen.'

'I love you Lisa.'

'I love you Alex! Don't worry.'

'I can't not worry, you're my niece.'

'So?!'

'Let's change the subject.'

'This isn't going to go away is it?'

'Maybe. Shall we put the television on.'

'I don't want to watch the television.'

'OK.'

'I have a better idea. I think it will cure your problems.'

'Oh?'

To my severe astonishment she just sat up and undid the belt on her dressing gown. The garment simply fell open. Suddenly I was looking at her stupendous breasts. I started to shiver like before and with my hand shaking I reached out and touched them. I just stroked them with the back of my hand at first. I moved a bit closer and fondled them with both hands. Her breasts were so soft. They were perfectly shaped. Just like big ripe pears. Her nipples were wondrously pink and juicy-looking.

'Would you like to do me Alex?'

My heart almost stopped as I had a huge missed beat on hearing her suggestion.

'I'm going to wake up in a minute, this is a dream.'

'It's not a dream. I'm real, these are real and my wet pussy is definitely real.'

'Don't say that Lisa.'

'Well it is. Wet I mean. Look.'

She leant back on the cushions and opened her legs. She had a beautiful neat rosy slit. She slid two finger in and up and I could see how it glistened. I put my hand on her knee and slowly slid my hand down her thigh until it was almost 'there.'

'Go on.' She urged.

I closed my eyes and gently slipped two fingers into her vagina. She was not only wet but hot. I had by now developed a sizeable erection. I think my nerves prevented me from becoming fully aroused, but it was enough for me to need to rearrange myself inside my pants.

'Why don't you take them off?'

'Why are we doing this Lisa?'

'I don't know, but I want to do it. Make love to me Alex.'

She said it so sweetly. So innocently, if that makes sense. Although I was her uncle, she also saw me I guess as a fit older man, whom she happened to care about. I could have - should have stopped there and then and gone to bed. I didn't even to stop to deliberate it. I soon had my trousers and pants off and was holding my by now throbbing dick in my hand. Lisa looked agog. I'm quite big, it has to be said.

'Wow Alex! Can I suck it?'

'If you must!'

I smiled sardonically. She leant over and covered my cock with her mouth. Oh how soft her mouth was. This was no rushed, rough blow job from a bored girlfriend. Lisa blew me with care. Her lips and tongue slipped around my member with a gentle finesse and it wasn't long before it was twitching with arousal. She slipped off her dressing gown completely and sat up on the sofa.

'Now?' She asked.

'OK.' I replied. 'But what about...?'

'It's OK, I'm on the pill'

'Oh OK!'

She moved closer and closer and then straddled my dick and lowered herself onto me. Her pussy felt so so good, I can't tell you. I've never known a feeling like it. She wrapped her arms around me and pushed her breasts into my face as she rode me. She had obviously had some experience in the last few months. I just moaned with pleasure as I sucked her nipples and she responded with a little whimper. We just fucked ever so gently like this for ages. I could feel my orgasm build up for such a long time, it was beyond amazing. I started to come eventually and it was just a long, slow orgasm. Lisa moved a little more quickly and her mews got louder. Until with my face pressed into her breasts, partly to muffle my screams of ecstasy, I ejaculated. My groin was convulsive and jerking like crazy as I pumped load after load into her. I think she came at the same time, but I'm not sure because I'd slipped into another world and wouldn't have known if a meteorite had hit the house.

We sat on the sofa together cuddling for a while. I stroked her hair as she had laid her head on my chest. Neither of us spoke because there was nothing to say. At this time it just felt so natural, so beautiful and wonderful. At last she got up and put her dressing gown on. I was concerned she might make a mess on the sofa from my stuff, but it was obviously still safely inside her. We never kissed. It's funny that, looking back. I don't know why. I always kiss during sex, but we didn't. I gave her a long hug and we went to our beds. I was wondering how we would feel in the morning and this is what I thought about as I drifted off to sleep.

It was Saturday morning and I woke at 6.30am. My first thought of course was of my niece, closely followed by my sister. What if Katrina had come down when I was having sex with my niece? The thought made me feel sick to the pit of my stomach. I put on my jeans and a T-shirt and went downstairs. I found Lisa already having breakfast in the conservatory. She was in her pyjamas and sat with one leg under her bottom on the studio couch in there.

'Good morning Lisa.'

'Hi Alex, morning.'

'How are you?'

'Fine - never felt better.'

'Lisa.'

'It's OK, I'm fine with everything.'

'I wish I was.'

'Oh. You regret it?'

Lisa look downcast.

'No, no, I don't regret it. It was wonderful.'

'Well then.'

'Lisa?'

'How come you're on the pill?'

'Aah. Yes.'

'You're in a relationship?'

'Not exactly. I've been seeing this guy from college. It's been a bit on and off.'

'Lucky guy.'

'Haa! Tell him that.'

'So you're not seeing him now, so why the pill?'

'I just had this feeling. This will sound ridiculous, but I sort of knew.'

'You anticipated this? How?'

'I hoped.'

'Oh Lisa, honey. Why.'

'You know I cherish your love Alex. You were always there for me.'

'But how could you know I would feel how I do?'

'I just did. I can't explain it. Am I bad?'

'No, no Lisa, you're not bad. You have to see what we're doing is wrong though.'

'Who says it's wrong?'

'You're my niece.'

'Yes. It's unethical maybe, but it's just how society sees it.'

'Hmmm, it's incest.'

'Urgh, that's a horrible word Alex! I'm not your daughter!!!!'

'I know, I know, it's not the same, but technically...'

'Alex, say you'll never say that word again!'

'I'm sorry Lisa, I didn't mean to upset you.'

Lisa stood up and put her cereal bowl on the table and began to weep. I sat next to her and held her in my arms. Tears were rolling down her cheeks as I began to fill up myself.

'Lisa, Lisa, last night was truly, truly beautiful.'

'Really?'

'Really, oh babe don't cry, you'll start me off.'

She looked at me, she could tell I was choked. Then there was a sound on the stairs. I jumped up and Lisa wiped her eyes. Katrina came through as I entered the kitchen. I rumbled through a cupboard gathering my thoughts. Katrina could see something was untoward, but Lisa managed to blag her way out of it.

'Are you OK darling? You look like you've been crying.'

'Ha ha, no, I had a choking fit on a cornflake, Alex had to hit me hard between the shoulder blades.'

'Oh my goodness! Are you OK?'

'Yes, it was a bit of a panic, but she's fine.' I said.

'Oh Alex, it's a good job you were here!'

'Yes I know, if I look a bit flustered!'

'Yeah, well I'm not surprised.'

Katrina hugged me. I felt bad with all the lies, but what could I do?

I settled down to have breakfast with my sister and Lisa went to get dressed. Katrina had decided a picnic would be a good idea, as it was a nice day and the forecast saying it was set fair. We were only 20 miles from the Peak District, with its pretty villages and it's hills and dales. Katrina asked me if I wanted to do anything else, but a picnic was fine. As long as Lisa would be there. I wanted to see as much of her as possible.

'Will Lisa be coming with us?'

'Of course, as if you need to ask.'

'Well, just making sure. I love her so much Katrina.'

'I know, and you know it's reciprocated.'

'Yes, she's lovely. So bright! Mathematics though, she was always into art.'

'I know. When she turned 16, something just clicked and she got decent grades at school and then got an A at A level. Her tutors said she is a natural mathematician.'

'Wow, well good for her. I'm so proud of her.'

'So am I. Jenny has done well for herself too. I'm proud of both of them.'

Lisa had come down and was dressed in tight faded jeans and a pink crop top. Her breasts were almost fighting to get out of the top and I think Katrina must have caught my gaze and noticed me gulp at her appearance.

'Blossomed hasn't she Alex.'

'Well yes.'

'She's got this boyfriend called Adam from college. She says he doesn't appreciate her.'

'Hmmmm, she deserves the best.'

Katrina went to the bathroom or something and I joined Lisa in the kitchen.

'Do you like my top?'

'What do you think?'

'Do you think we'll find some more time alone Alex?'

'Lisa, are you sure.'

'Oh yes, please. After this weekend, I've only got a month till Uni. Let's make the most of it and then it will be over.'

'Over?'

'This thing, our special relationship.'

'You've got it worked out haven't you?' I said pleasantly.

'Yes, I realise it's not practical for us to have a sustained relationship. I just want us to grasp the moment.'

'Where can we go? We can't rely on your Mum not being around.'

'You could sneak into my bedroom.'

'Ooh that's risky - but then last night was risky.'

Lisa began to laugh

'If she had have come down - fuck! She would have gone bananas!'

'It's not funny Lisa.'

'I suppose not.' She said, still chuckling.

'Your mother would be devastated if she knew about this.'

'I know, sorry, we have to be careful. I love Mum, I'd hate to hurt her.'

'OK, yes we have to be careful.'

I felt like a bit of a shit, even discussing the cunning assignations we would have to make. At the time, my feelings for Lisa were so overwhelming, it seemed justified. I knew that for my sister to find out meant the irreconcilable break up of our family. I can't even begin to imagine the consequences. She wouldn't possibly understand. I know Lisa knew this despite her frivolity. It was a necessary deception. Katrina came back and put a few cakes in a hamper along with some sandwiches and a couple of bottles of wine. By 10am we were ready.