Absolute Power

A Tale of the Genie Wars

*

I frowned as I looked at the Nile crate that had been dropped before my front door -- the peeling postage on the side proclaiming that it came from my Aunt. The corners of the box looked like they had been pretty badly beaten up, but that was why the Nile was the second most popular online shipping and delivery service in the world.

"Goddamn it, Janice," I said, kneeling slowly down and picking up the box.

Once I was inside my house, I spent a few moments cursing the fact that I hadn't grabbed my picker-upper. I knew there was an actual name for the thing I used to pick up moderately light weight objects without needing to bend over...but I had never really bothered to learn it, out of bloody stubborn mindedness. I'd accept the crippling. I'd even accept the massive debt from getting my body pieced back together inch by bloody goddamn inch by overpaid doctors. But I'd rot in hell before I remembered the cutesy name my health provider gave to my grabby thing.

Spiteful? Maybe.

But you'd be spiteful too if you were hit by a goddamn car while buying ice cream. Vanilla ice cream, just to add insult to injury. They hadn't even had french vanilla, the kind of vanilla I preferred. I shook my head as I hobbled inch by inch to the kitchen counter top. As I hobbled, my kitten Sparks ran around my ankles, meowing excitedly. She lay on her belly, then rolled onto her back, then sprang up onto the counter as I slowly, slowly, sloooowly set the box down. Sparks started to bat at my fingers, her meowing going from 'hi hi hi hi!' to 'pet pet pet pet!'

I swear, I had a dog sometimes.

Once I had put the box down, I fumbled around in my pockets until I found my swiss army knife. I flicked it open, took vicious pleasure in stabbing the box and sliding the tape apart. I imagined it was the driver who had hit me with the car...and then opened the box to find that my Aunt Janice had mailed me, at no small expense, an old style scientific calculator. The kind that you could actually play games on, back before every phone had become self aware and capable of projecting holograms (or whatever it was that phones could do these days.)

I scowled at the calculator.

"Thanks, Janice," I said, sighing.

My phone started to ring -- as if it recognized the dinosaur that I was looking at and wanted to remind me that it was still the top of the electronics food chain. I set my knife down, leaning on the counter as I slowly reached down to tug my phone from my other pocket. I saw it was a call from my friend Matt. I tapped it on, putting it to my ear, and saying: "Yeah, what do you want?"

"Whoa, Leon," Matt said, sounding amused. "What about, hey Matt, hows it going?"

"Die in a fire," I said, my voice dry.

"That's the Leon I know!" He sighed. "I was just thinking, we should get back to the hanging out scene. There's this new bar downtown called the Health Bar. You can play games there while getting buzzed, you know?"

"Huh," I said. "Two problems: I can't drink."

"Well..."

"And, even worse, I don't drink. I hate drinking," I said, frowning slightly -- that...was kind of weird. Matt was a goof, but he didn't normally forget things like that.

"Well, yeah, but..." he said, his voice fumbling a bit. I glanced down at the calculator -- my brow furrowing as I noticed that the tiny solar panel that was seated on the top of the calculator was glowing a pale blue. Which was weird as shit, but not quite as weird as the screen display. It was showing, in curved lines (which was impossible) a series of cursive letters. Which was also impossible, this was a calculator, as I felt like I needed to remind the damn thing.

Of course, I could barely read hand writing, let alone cursive.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh, I was just saying, we don't hang out much anymore," Matt said, sounding a bit abashed. "And I was figuring, I mean, bars can be fun!"

"Uh, can I call you back, Matt?" I asked, tapping my phone off before he could respond. I set my phone down as I leaned forward and looked at the calculator as the cursive continued to scroll across. I started to figure out what it was saying after a few moments of squinting and cocking my head.

HANG UP THE PHONE AND OH GOOD GREETINGS MASTER

"...Janice, are you trying to prank me from Siberia?" I asked the calculator. "Is this a custom built thing?" I picked up the calculator, frowning as I did so.

I AM NOT JANICE -- THOUGH I DO KNOW JANICE. IF YOU WANT Y

The cursive ran out of room. I rubbed my thumb along the keys, trying to find which one would...do anything. My thumb pressed against the arrow key to the left that I was fairly sure was normally used for graphing programs. The calculator shuddered and quivered and the cursive started to flash.

THAT WORKS THAT WORKS THAT WORKS

"Wha-" I started.

Then the calculator exploded.

The force of it sent me sprawling backwards, my cane skittering away as I felt several of my stitches burst and some of the metal chunks that the doctors had put in while taking other metal chunks out started to jar around. I felt something wet cough into my mouth and I finished skidding, Sparks hopping onto my chest and licking at my face -- clearly worried and terrified. But considering Sparks was in the room and not bolting towards the back yard was a testament to how much like a dog she was.

I craned my head up -- looking at the curling smoke that bloomed above the kitchen counter. It drifted aside and sitting there was...a boy.

He looked to be about twenty years old -- young and slender, with skin so pale that he looked to be made of pure alabaster. His hair was dark black with a single purple streak through it, while a pair of thick glasses sat on his cute button nose. His eyes were folded -- giving him a slightly Asian cast to his features -- but the rest of his body was clad in slender leather straps and pouches that were arranged in a way that managed to cover both nipples, his junk, and almost nothing else. His left arm had a large calculator strapped to a wrist-band, giving him a retro-sci-fi look mixed in with the punk-goth attire. His lips were painted black, and his eyes were bright red.

"Greetings, oh...shit," he said, his eyes widening as he sprang off the counter, landing on the hardwood floor beside me. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah..." I said, my voice acid. "I just decided to snap a rib and dislocate my shoulder for fun because that's just how we have fun in America these days."

The boy frowned at me. "No need to get snippy, master."

He snapped his fingers...

And I was standing up. I blinked and put my hands on my chest, then looked down at my feet -- I was wearing the same clothes, though...I lifted one leg experimentally. My knee bent perfectly normally, and I was able to balance on my other foot. I started to hop, and with growing joy, I realized...I was able to move! I was able to move and spin and dance like I was before the car had run me down! I spread my arms, spinning around in a circle. "HAH!" I laughed. "HOLY CRAP!" I said, then grabbed the boy, hugging him tightly. "I forgive you for blowing up, Jesus Christ, that's amazing!"

He laughed. "Hey, hey, hey," he said. "Don't go bragging to people -- I technically broke the rules..."

I drew back, still beaming as my hands rested on his shoulders. "Rules?" I asked.

"Genie rules!" he beamed as he put his hand on his chest. "I am Calculator -- a genie of the technological realm."

"...okay..." I said, slowly.

"Um, super basics...ever seen Aladdin?" He asked, cocking his head.

"Yeah," I said.

"Well, then, at least I know you got the basics -- thought the specifics are surely FUBAR," the genie -- Calculator. Lator? Calc? I didn't know what to call him, really. Still, it was shocking to hear a mythological creature, ripped straight from the tales of mythical Arabia, standing before me...with the name Calculator and using phrases like "FUBAR" and referencing my third most favorite Disney movie.

I brushed my hands along my face. "How many wishes?"

"As many as you want, so long as you keep this," he said, picking up the calculator -- I had thought it had exploded, but it was still perfectly intact. "If another gets this and uses it, even if they don't know it's my phylactery, then you are fucked."

"Right," I said, nodding. "W-What are the limits on my wishes?"

As I thought this, my head started to spin.

"Theoretically? None!" He said. "Want to be lord god of the entire world? Sure! Want to have sex with yourself as a girl? Totally doable! Want to pilot the EAS Agamemnon? I got you covered."

"You..." I blinked. "You just won five points for dropping the classy, obscure reference." I tapped the side of my nose -- feeling a giddy excitement adding itself to the spinning feeling in my head. It felt like I was already shooting through the stratosphere.

"Thanks, master," he said, bowing to me. "Now, there are practical concerns. My wishes can do anything, but I'm not the only genie, and my powers are due to the spread of my aspect -- I draw energy from technology. Its ubiquity is why I have such cosmic powers..." He grinned. "I hopped onto the bandwagon in the 18^th century and a lot of other djinn have been jealous ever since -- before you ask, the less powerful an aspect, the easier it is to transfer to it. It's like climbing a mountain -- easier to climb up it when it's small than when it has become tall."

I nodded, slowly, and sat down in a seat -- loving the way that I could just sit without worrying. "So, how does that..." I blinked. "If I wish to be the dragon-king god of a world of magic, then your power gets drained away cause technology is gone."

"Yes!" He beamed. "You're a sharp cookie -- Janice said you were clever. And snarky." He giggled.

I frowned. "How do you know my Aunt?" I asked.

"Oh, I've been fucking her silly for three centuries, roughly," he said, casually.

My cheeks flushed as, for a moment, my mind was filled with the mental image of my parent's sister. She had aged gracefully, and her body had played through some of my hormone driven teenage fantasies, to the deep confusion of my younger self. Then the second half of Calculator's sentence jammed into my brain, dislodging my Aunt's perky breasts. I shook my head and looked at him again.

"Cent...that...is a stupid question I was about to say, of course she can live longer, she has a goddamn djinn, Leon," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Smart cookie," Calculator said, grinning. "So, I get infinite cosmic power, immortality -- something most djinn don't get -- and all I have to give up is some of my free will. Pretty good deal. So, your wishes can damage my aspect, but I'd suggest against it. And other djinn can undo my wishes if their masters will it -- it's easier to undo reality warping. Reality is lazy -- it likes being where it is. So, it's easier to get an alcoholic to fall back on the bandwagon than to get him off it." He nodded. "Does that make sense?"

"Totally," I said, rubbing my chin. "So...there are djinn out there with different aspects -- like...fire, nature, magic. A lot of them have gotten weaker, but they might still have the ability to undo wishes." I frowned. "Does..." I blinked -- and all the excitement and giddiness faded away as I sat up. "Wait, does that mean there's a secretive shadow war being waged, focused on trying to spread and promote aspects to empower the djinn linked to them -- with good and evil men and women fighting to gain domination of not just the world but all possible worlds!?"

Calculator blinked at me.

"Wow," he said. "Janice said you were smart, she didn't say you were freaking genre aware..."

I leaned back in my seat. "This is a trip..."

Calculator smiled. "So," he said. "What is your first wish?"

I rubbed my chin. I opened my mouth -- about to wish for something. But then I stopped. "I'll need to make a call."

I stood up, then took a few moments to simply enjoy standing without needing a cane. I stretched my legs, bounced from foot to foot, then hurried up the stairs. Once I was at my room, Calculator appeared on my bed, stretching himself out like a cat. Which definitely irritated Sparks, who hissed and snarled at him, her back arching slightly. I threw myself into my seat, letting myself enjoy the fact that it had taken me fifteen seconds rather than fifteen minutes to get here. I spun the chair in a circle, kicking my computer's power button on. As it started to whir and rattle to life, Calculator reached down and started to rub Sparks' nose with his finger.

"So, do you want me to become a pretty girl?" he asked. "I'm totally fine with that, before you ask."

"Hmm?" I looked over. "Oh, no, I'm bi."

"I love the 21^st century," Calculator said in a quiet sing song.

The computer had finished booting. "Come onnnn Galaxy, be online," I said, my fingers crossing as my instant messenger program came online. I whooped and started to type as quickly as I could.

ALeonSandwich: Hey! Laxy! Call your work and tell them that you can't come in today.

Galaxy22: *giggles* You are a goofster, Leon. But, um, I actually DO have to work.

ALeonSandwich: We've known each other for years and years, Laxy. I am 100% serious -- just do this for me. Please?

Galaxy22: ...okay. Brb.

"I see what you're about," Calculator said. "So, who is Galaxy?"

"She...well, er, he..." I trailed off, drumming my fingers as I watched the screen. The letters didn't change and there was no sign that Laxy was typing up more. I had never been quite this excited while talking to Laxy before -- but I had also never had a genie before. I realized I hadn't actually finished the sentence. "Basically, he was...born female. But he always wanted to be...I mean-"

"Oh, he's trans," Calculator said. Then, slightly, he smiled. "Your first wish was to turn your trans friend into their preferred gender? Or...sex? Which is it again?"

"If I remember right," I said -- then stopped.

Galaxy22: Okay. I'm calling in the one of the three sick days I get this month because my job suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks. What's up?

I smiled. "Calculator. I wish that Laxy -- the biologically female individual whose online screen na-"

Calculator snapped his fingers. A white flash consumed the left corner of the room and when it faded, Laxy stood before me: She was larger than she tended to roleplay herself as -- even as a man, her online personas and characters tended to be svelte and slender. Her shoulders were broad and underneath her pudgy body was hardened lumps of muscle -- the signs of someone who worked at a physical job. A lot. She looked around, her eyes wide. "W-what the..." she whispered.

Calculator looked at me. "You don't need to be that exact. I won't screw you via wording. I have standards, you know?"

I nodded. "Hi Laxy,' I said, smiling.

"Am I dreaming?" Laxy asked, her voice high for such a large body. She reached up -- pinching her cheek between her thumb and forefinger. "Ow!" She shook her head. "Holy shit, I am not dreaming, holy shit holy-"

I stood up, then grandly said: "Calculator -- I wish that Laxy was transformed into the body that he prefers, and that no one in their life finds this odd -- furthermore, I wish that all of their paperwork supports their new appearance -- essentially, I want them to have always been this proper gender in the views of those around them and the bureaucracy that surrounds us...without changing his memory, of course."

"You...like covering your bases, don't you?" Calculator asked, snapping his fingers.

When the light faded, Laxy was...

Gorgeous. His face was slender and feminine, with long white hair that had black highlights along the tips. It coiled and spread across his narrow shoulders, while the blouse and pants that he had been wearing before hung, tentlike, on his body. Tugging it off, Laxy stripped naked with the eagerness of a cicada climbing out of their skin: Revealing that his belly was flat and muscular, his arms long and ropy. He was completely hairless below his neck, his balls firm and large, his cock hardening as new hormones rushed through his body. He sighed, eyes closed -- tears streaming along his cheeks as he spread his arms.

I smiled, slightly, then walked forward. I took him in my arms, hugging him, our bodies pressed together. I felt my cock growing hard against my jeans, surging to life in reaction to his hardness. I had just planned this for a friendship hug -- but then Laxy was kissing me. His mouth and mine met, his tongue darting into my mouth as my hands reached down, cupping and squeezing his firm ass. My hand slid of its own accord between his legs, squeezing his balls as his tongue darted forward against mine, then drew back. He panted.

"I'm really fucking horny," he whispered, his nose sniffling -- I could taste tears when I kissed his cheek.

"I noticed," I said.

"But..." he paused. "W-We need to make more wishes."

I grinned, slowly, then kissed his neck. "We have time..."

"No, I mean," Laxy said, putting his hands on my chest and shoving me back, his cock bobbing faintly now that it wasn't caught between us. My hand trailed off his balls, stroking them for a moment before dropping. "There are people dying every day -- every second, who we can help."

"Sorry," Calculator said, cutting into the conversation. "Before you even go on that route -- I have a great deal of power...but even I can't save everyone. The easy fixes have been done. There's a reason why humans live to be almost a hundred years old, technology advances rapidly, and there are far fewer famines and plagues. All the other things that bump people off tend to be tricky and linked to things like...well..." he shrugged. "Free will. We could abolish all heart disease by stamping out every decision that promotes it -- but after a certain point, you're just straight jacketing people. There were periods of time where free will was supressed, to suit a specific utopia...but whose utopia?"

He shrugged. "Some people want worlds without violence -- but then what do people do when they're ruled by wicked or cruel people? You can be surprised how much evil you can do without throwing a punch..."

I rubbed my chin, frowning.

"Oh!" I snapped my fingers. "I wish that I and Laxy, no matter what happens, remembers how the world was before any reality shifting. That is, we remember how we started. That way," I said, turning my head to Laxy, grinning at him. "If some evil jerkward wishes for their own world, we can wish it back to where it was before."

"That's thinking with your noodle," Calculator said, tapping his temple. "So...back to the fun stuff?"

I blushed, coughing. Laxy and I had been friends for years -- over the internet, yes. And with the internet, you could do and be anything...so long as you were fine with writing it out and jerking yourself off while reading the smut. Now, Laxy looked like how he wanted to -- and I could wish for anything in the world. We could do any of the scenes we had discussed or roleplayed over the years...and now, with all those choices, I had no idea what to do first. I sat down on the bed next to Calculator, then looked at Laxy.

"Got any ideas?" I asked.

Laxy looked down at his body -- looking as if he was still marveling at the change. "Well," he said. "You could try being a furry?"

I nodded. "I wish," I said. "That...I..." I paused, thinking. A light bulb sprang on over my head. I smiled and turned to face Calculator square on. "I wish that my body's cells are replaced with highly advanced nanotechnological replicas that are able to shift my form -- as well as provide all the standard transhuman augmentation perks: Better muscles, no need to breathe or eat, head computer, all that fun stuff. All without loss of tactile senses."