Alexaverse One-Shots 01

"All I am saying is that with dedication and an understanding of application, anyone has the capacity to do what I do," Karen pointed out, holding her coffee cup elegantly before taking a sip. "Whether you are being hosted by a gent, or if you are hosting-"

"Can't host right now," Janet said. "My room smells like chicken."

"Mine too," Mona snickered.

"Do I even want to know why your rooms reek of poultry?" Karen asked. "Wait... never mind, I actually don't want to know."

The two girls shrugged before returning to their beverages.

"But as I was saying," Karen continued. "Once a lady has learned certain things, it behooves her to make sure there is a gestalt effect involved. One aspect easily and greatly enhances another, or many others."

Shelly listened intently.

"Janet, what you would call a 'handy' or a 'beej', both of those actions are much better when used in tandem, yes?"

The brunette considered. "If y'mean do guys like it when you jerk them off and blow them at the same time, then yeah. The two of 'em together is better than each part by itself, defo."

"Greater than the sum of its parts," Mona said, nodding. "Yeah, I've heard the term. So when Li called you the 'total package' earlier, it means even more than that. If you got, say, twenty aspects of training, then the way you use it all, it's a lot more than twenty. It's twenty times twenty."

"That is a decent analogy for it," Karen replied. "You can get a lot more out of what was put in, so to speak. You just need the pieces."

Do I have them? Shelly wondered. I've heard her talk about so much. And none of it by itself was difficult. Does finding a way to put it all together make that much of a difference?

She had to know. She was going to bite the bullet and introduce herself. Finishing off her coffee and working up her nerve, she continued listening.

"Y'goin' to that party at the frat house just off-campus this Friday?" Mona asked her friends. "Coupla girls from my art classes want me to go."

"I'm plannin' on goin', that frat throws really good parties," Janet mentioned. "I was at one last year, got it in at least twice."

"Well, there's the measure of how good a party is," Karen said dryly while the other girls giggled. "Just how many times a girl gets defiled is the litmus test, no doubt. However, I was also invited, and it might be fun to cut loose before we have to knuckle down for exams."

"I got invited too," Lisa added. "The frat is apparently tied with a sorority that is pretty accepting of gay girls, so I won't get any grief for my lifestyle choices."

"Heyman, those horny frat boys are just hopin' to catch a little lezzie action, you doorknob," Janet laughed.

"Well, I'm still going, even if I'm not giving them any lezzie action," the redhead sniffed. "A girl has standards, y'know."

"Yeah, and for whatever crazy reason, you dumped Princess here," Mona teased, making Lisa sigh in resignation. So much for sensible standards. "So we're all going?"

"T'would appear so," Karen observed. "It will be fun to have my best friends there, admittedly, see what trouble we can get up to."

"Just go easy on the frat boys, Kar," Lisa seemed to plead. "They can't all be bad people."

"Who knows, I might even leave one or two for Mona and Janet," the bronze-haired goddess lilted, making them all laugh as she stood up. "Alas, I must depart, I want to borrow DeBourne's oversized cranium for some calculations that fall outside my algebraic variety. I'll see you all soon, ladies. Ta!"

"She is the only woman within a fifty-kilometer radius whose principal interest in DeBourne is his brain," Janet muttered as they watched their friend saunter gracefully back toward campus, perhaps with a tiny wiggle in her walk. You couldn't help but stare.

"Please, it's just an excuse," Mona laughed. "Maybe she can't admit it to herself yet."

"Um, s'cuse me?" Lisa chimed in, trying to sound annoyed. "Her roomie and girlfriend sitting right here."

"You dumped her, you silly box," Janet snorted. "Remember? We just discussed that point."

"That doesn't mean I like sounding like I've been tossed over," Lisa mumbled.

"Last thing you got tossed over was DeBourne's shoulder and fed pickle brine, as I recall," Janet quipped, making Mona bust out laughing again. "It's like you never learn."

The three women continued cheerfully faux-squabbling as they cleaned up their table and headed off, discussing meeting up for the party. Apparently even DeBourne was going to be there. Shelly sat in stunned silence, thinking about what she'd heard.

Were they really all going to that party? Holy shit, I've been invited to that party too!

Shelly had been seriously thinking about not going, based on how crappy things had been for her recently, but now...

She didn't have to awkwardly walk up to them and meet them! She could meet and mingle with them at this gathering! And imagine how cool it'd be if they saw her as the life of the party, charming, elegant, knowing what to say, and how to charm the pants off men with little more than a smile!

To Hell with chicken, she was gonna do this for great rep! Karen Gordon would be impressed with her! Maybe see the worth in taking Shelly under her wing, help her polish up all these skills!

Yes! Shelly thought excitedly, squeezing her eyes shut and tippling her toes against the concrete beneath the table. It's finally all gonna pay off! All the bad starts, all the mistakes, all the twigs in my ass, dogs humping my legs and unwanted anal sex...

It was all just the path to her success here and now! She was being given her chance and wouldn't blow it!

She cleaned up and then rushed to her dorm room to find a dress for the party.

***

Kappa Eta Gamma fraternity house, a block from campus, Friday night...

She'd arrived perhaps a little more early than was necessary, but she knew the girls were going to arrive fashionably late. They could afford to, since they were a force to be reckoned with on campus. Apparently Janet and Mona had instructed DeBourne to not show up early and try to be helpful, although he was known to have a dislike for fraternities, so maybe he wouldn't have anyway.

She was already enjoying the vibe and groove of the place, dancing with a few people in a room that was painted with blacklight paint, and everyone was glowing under it to some degree. There were still mostly guys at the party as yet, no doubt members of the fraternity, but a few women had shown by now, so she didn't feel out of place. She laughed and danced, scoping out the scenery, making her plan for how the evening would go.

Was she just there to dazzle everyone? Did she want to get laid? What impression did she want to leave people with upon her exit?

Oh, God, would she leave with Karen and the others once she'd made her impression on them?

'How Will I Know' by Whitney Houston was playing on the boombox at the back of the room she was in, and she laughed while she wiggled around with some girls and guys. She had a plastic cup in one hand, having winked at the young man who was mixing drinks to 'surprise her', but make it tasty. It wasn't a bad drink, although she didn't have that much experience with alcohol either. Her parents frowned on her or Ethan drinking; only her older sister Sal didn't get the stink-eye about it.

"You look like you're havin' a good time," a young man said as he walked up to her. She continued dancing, not breaking her wiggling rhythm, but she also turned her head and spoke to him, making him her focus.

"I am, thank you so much for asking," she said in what she hoped was a measured but pleasant tone, accentuating the words she thought mattered in her response. "It is a great party so far, and the evening is young!"

"Oh, are you from another country?" he asked, seemingly interested. "I love how you speak."

"N-no, sorry," she faltered for a split second, recalibrating and thinking this through. "Just that the music's a little loud and I wanted to be sure you heard me. No, I'm as Toronto as they come!"

"Ah, okay," he said, grinning. "I figured you were either a foreigner or having a stroke, good to know you're just makin' sure you can be heard."

Her countenance must have darkened for a moment, because he nodded to her and then hurried off to go talk to someone else.

Bit of a false start, but the night's young, she told herself, making sure she didn't lose her confidence. One idiot frat boy who doesn't know what sophistication is won't ruin this night for me!

She danced with the music blaring around her.

"Oh, wake me, I'm shaking

Wish I had you near me now, uh-huh

Said there's no mistaking

What I feel is really love

Ooh, tell me how will I know? (Don't trust your feelings)

How will I know?

How will I know? (Love can be deceiving)

How will I know?"

Damn, I don't really know many good dance moves, she realized while she watched the people around her. One black guy was doing some pop and lock stuff that lead into pretty fantastic breakdancing moves, at least, moves that didn't involve spinning on his head, and didn't take up too much room. Some girls wearing lots of neon and plastic bangles on their extremities were looking on and cheering. Shelly got closer and tried to join in with the onlookers, be part of the crowd.

"Wow, he's really good, isn't he?" she remarked, standing next to a frizzy blonde wearing a rainbow of colours. Shelly thought she'd made a good choice for her party outfit, but she felt drab next to this girl. She was wearing a short, frilly black skirt that almost looked like it was made of velvet. She was wearing a black tank-top that exposed her midriff, and over it was some sort of dayglo mesh or fishnet shirt that teased everything below. She had dayglo arm and leg warmers on as well. The big, chunky plastic jewelry in garish colours matched the lacy bow in her hair. She looked like a dancer from a Madonna video.

Shelly's yellow dress seemed rather drab and dowdy in comparison. She'd been so certain of her choice too!

"Yeah, he's a big hit around here," the frizzy blonde agreed, nodding but still watching. "Apparently Desmond has some new moves he's planning to show off for some girls who're gonna be here tonight. He's hopin' to impress one of them."

Gee, wonder who that could be... Shelly wondered darkly. They're always crowding in on me, dammit.

She nodded and bopped along with the music while everyone watched the small clearing the kid named Desmond was dancing in. Shelly admitted that she was in awe, because she probably couldn't even do that new 'cabbage patch' dance properly. Wiggling her hips and moving her arms was about as good as it got with her. God, she'd love to be able to dance like those girls in music videos.

The girl lit a cigarette and took a pull on it before offering it to Shelly. She paused, her mind racing as to what to do. It's only one cigarette, and just a drag from it. Nothing like the dyke bar the other night. And she does make it look casual and cool.

"Thank you," Shelly said in what she hoped was an elegant timbre, taking the cigarette from the girl and bringing it to her lips, hoping she looked sophisticated in the way she was holding it. She screwed her eyes up as the smoke burned her lungs and throat and she choke-coughed, restraining it as best she could.

"Goodness, darling," she said, trying not to wheeze as she handed it back to the girl, smiling as her eyes watered. "Is that an unblended brand from another country?"

"Nnnno, just your standard du Maurier that I picked up at the corner," the frizzy blonde replied, her eyebrow raised. "Y'not a smoker? You could've just said so."

"Clearly more practice is in order," Shelly managed to say, still trying to smile. The girl shrugged and went back to watching the dancing. Shelly drained her drink, hoping to calm the fire in her trachea, but it seemed to just make it worse. Whimpering, she slinked off and went to another room to try and find water.

"Jeeeeeeeee-zus..." she gasped, darting around a corner and leaning over, clutching her throat, her eyes wide. She supported herself with her free hand on the wall as she attempted to get her breath back. "Fucking Hell, who thinks that's a way to stay popular?!"

She stood up straight, taking several deep breaths, her eyes closed while she wiped any tears from her cheeks. That had hurt, but she would recover. She realized she'd made an error. Karen would not accept a cigarette if offered, and she would do so graciously. She imagined the other girls would do the same. It was one thing to be popular, but another thing to be a people-pleaser. She needed to just make the right choices.

She found some water while she watched things happen from a corner. Once her lungs felt normal, she nodded to herself and decided it was time to try again. She looked down at her watch, noticing that she still had time before the girls were likely to show. What would she do to get back into the swing of things and wow everyone?

Drinking? Dancing?

You're not doing this to be popular, dammit. You want to know how to fuck like a goddess. So you need to fuck!

She was in a frat house full of horny frat boys. How hard could it possibly be to get laid? At least some of them had to be virgins, right? And that was where she'd wow them, because she could teach them things now.

Stick to the mission. Karen'll get here and everyone'll already be whispering your name in awe.

She strode back out into the party, giving a dazzling smile. The place was filling up, and she could hear Madonna's 'Papa Don't Preach' playing. She bit her lip and gave herself a nod, knowing that she had to get in there and dance it up, she couldn't be a wallflower the whole night and succeed. The problem was, she wasn't much of a dancer.

She thought about dance moves she could do, even if they weren't current. Could she still make them look fun?

The last time she'd been home, she'd watched the movie 'Five Miles To Midnight' with her dad, and she thought about that Sophia Loren chick and how she'd danced. That didn't seem to hard, and she was pretty sure her dress would complement the action.

She grabbed a plastic cup from a tray and knocked it back without thinking about the contents before plunging into the midst of a growing group of dancers on the floor. She began her Sophia Loren wiggle moves, smiling brightly at everyone around her. She thrust her arms out...

... and knocked a girl's plastic cup out of her hands and spilling the drink all over the front of her dress.

"Ah!" the girl yelped in shock before glaring at Shelly. "What the Hell?! Watch what you're doing!"

"Sorry! So sorry!" Shelly said hastily, red with embarrassment and panic as she pulled the girl from the churning mob and over to a corner where they tried to ascertain the damage. "Total accident, I swear to God!"

"My dress is fucking ruined," the girl hissed glaring at her. "I just bought this last week!"

"P-please, let me try to help you get the stain out before it sets!" Shelly faltered, looking around for water and perhaps paper towels. "I could-"

"You've done enough, bitch, thanks!" the girl almost snarled as she yanked the hem of her dress out of Shelly's hands and stomped away. Shelly watched helplessly, her mouth moving, but no sound coming out. Apparently her part in this little gaffe was over.

Keep dancing. Maybe nobody noticed, or thought anything about it. Bumps and accidents happen at parties, right?

Another deep intake of breath to compose herself, and she went back in, starting to dance again. She was thankful to see that many people were as inept at dancing as she was, so it didn't seem to matter. At least her dress was proving accommodating to the way she was moving. She seemed to have blended back in with little effort, nobody looking at her with disdain over the earlier accident.

But blending wasn't the objective here, was it? She wasn't going to get fucked if she wasn't standing out, was she?

She thought about what the girls would be wearing. After the afternoon at the café, she'd heard Janet mention to someone that she was wearing some new red jumpsuit she had bought, with white belt and white pumps.

Wow, she's gonna be a fucking hit, Shelly thought, still dancing. I'm gonna have to really work it hard tonight to be noticed once they get here.

"Hey!" she said to a guy as she danced up next to him. "Great party, eh?"

"Yeah, we throw the best!" he replied breathily while he danced. He kind of looked like Anthony Michael Hall, but with some pimples. "Haven't seen you before, this your first time at one of our parties?"

"Yes!" she said eagerly, remembering her diction. "I'm really enjoying myself. I'm Shelly, by the way."

"I'm Chris," he replied, moving closer so that they were dancing together. They weren't pressed up on one another, but they bumped occasionally because of all the bodies around them. "I'm a new pledge from earlier this year, so they make me do most of the scut work for these things, but I still have a lot of fun."

"Gottny plans for tonight?" she asked, wondering if this guy was where her fun began.

"Kinda off-duty until tomorrow for the big cleanup, so at least my time's my own until then," he said, unashamed of his dorky white-bread moves while 'The Reflex' by Duran Duran played. "Just kinda seein' how my evening plays out, right?"

"Well, you could start by getting me another drink," she said, giving her new associate a smirk and a wink. "That's a good start to the rest of your evening, I think."

He paused as he thought about what she was saying and then nodded. "S-sure. What do you want?"

"Surprise me, big boy," she purred.

"What?" he said loudly, leaning in with his ear cocked toward her. "What did you say?"

Well, there's that sexy moment gone, she sighed as she leaned in to speak in his ear. "I don't mind, you decide for me."

"Oh, uh, sure..." he said as he hurried off. She wondered if she was supposed to follow him, but thought about what the girls would do. No, Karen'd keep dancing while the boy she'd just enslaved went to get a drink for her. She would be polite and thank him generously, but she wouldn't interrupt what she was doing.

"Not a bad li'l dancer, are you?" said a deep voice next to her.

She looked over and saw a guy dancing, grinning at her. He was certainly bigger than the boy she'd just sent for a drink, even if he was nowhere near as big as DeBourne. He was wearing a red tee that showed off an athletic build, and his jeans were tight. His hair was dark and worn short.

"Thank you," she replied, nodding and smiling brightly, remembering to be charming and eloquent. "I love to dance. This is a good party. Are you a member here?"

"Yep, this is my final year," he said, making sure she knew he was a big deal. "I help organize these parties. This is one of our big year-end blowouts, y'know?"

"I'm just sorry I've never been to one before," she said a little breathlessly, still dancing, working up a bit of a sweat in these close quarters. "Great way for a lady to have some fun."

"If you're lookin' for a good time, you're in the right place," he assured her. "All the best people show up at Kappa parties."

"Does everyone here know how to show a lady a good time?" Shelly asked in a rather forward tone. She didn't see Karen being sheepish or oblique with her intentions.

"I won't speak for everyone in our frat, but I sure do," he said, grinning almost wolfishly. "If you're lookin' for a good evening, I'm sure I can-"