Alisha: A dark Romance Ch. 03

She returned to her mother and holding on to her leg; she peered up at Ali and Julia. "Who are you; I saw you on Uncle Ben's boat.

I don't think either of them knew what to say, so I said. "This is Alisha, and she's my wife." Ali drew her breath in at that.

"This," I said as I took Julia's hand, "is my daughter, Julia."

"And this young lady," I said to Ali and Julia, "is Emily, my goddaughter, and I guess her baby brother is upstairs fast asleep."

"You've seen Uncle Ben, and now it's time for you to go to bed, Nana is waiting for you," Simone said. Emily went with a lot less fuss than usual, and Simone showed us to our table.

The table was laid for six, and Ali and Julia insisted I sit between them. Once we were seated, Simone said, "Welcome to the 'Auberge des Ecluse.' Does anyone have any allergies or special dietary needs, as the chef will be selecting your tasting menu tonight."

"Oh God, Ben, we're going to be uncle Jaap's guinea pigs again," Alwyn muttered. The others reassured Simone that they'd be fine with Jaap's choices. She placed several of bottles of water on the table next to a couple of opened bottles of wine from Pete's vineyards.

"One of Pete's best vintages," I said, having checked the label as I poured the wine. Raf put his hand over his glass, and I put a splash into Julia's glass, topping it up with water. Ali gave me a quizzical look.

"We're in France; most of the children here drink watered down wine when they go out with their parents for dinner."

"Only one glass then," Ali said, and Julia gave me a pleased smile.

Simone served the first course, and the table grew quiet as we all appreciated Jaap's skill. Further courses followed, interspersed with polite conversation, all of us staying clear of the elephant in the room.

Finally, Ali pushed her empty dessert plate away from her and sighed contentedly. "I don't think I've enjoyed a meal as nice as this for ages," she said.

Then looking at me she said, "It's time, you were going to tell me what you've been up to all these years?"

"The long or the short version?"

"How about the Cliff Notes version, for the moment."

"Well, there's no epic drama, I'm afraid. My life is what you see. Other than the first few months, I've been living around here. In the beginning, I was staying with Pete, then I rented a boat. I wrote a book that did reasonably well, which gave me the funds to buy Never, and sailed her around southern Europe and the Mediterranean for a couple of years before returning here. I bought the land, and the cottage from Pete, and he and I went into business together. We're partners in a holiday home letting agency, and we have been making wine from the grapes we grow in our vineyards."

"So you made the wine we were drinking?" Sandy asked.

"No, that vintage was before I was involved in the business."

"What was the book?" Ali asked, her voice laced with suspicion. "I've been looking for you all this time, and the investigators I used would have spotted a book you'd written. They were looking for any mention of you."

I smiled at her, "Only if I'd published it using my name, Ali."

Sandy whispered, "Al, it must be 'Of Love Lost!'. I think he's Xander Morton; I know we suspected that there were too many similarities between the wife and you. There were just too many for it to be a coincidence. I guess we were right.

"That was a brutal, beautiful and powerful book," Ali said. "I was in tears when I read it. It hit home so much, I saw so much of what I'd done to you in the pages, but there were enough differences that I was never sure. Did I hurt you so much that you had to write it?"

"Not really, I was hurting, but it was more a way to excise you from my life. Turning it into a novel set in America and fictionalizing the couple into bigger than life characters meant I was able to look on you as a fictional person. The person I saw on the posters and billboards wasn't my ex-wife but a character in a book. It worked until now."

There was a silence around the table as I finished talking. Ali looked desperately upset as my words struck deep into her soul.

"You know I played one of the model friends of the wife, in the film," Ali said as she tried to shrug off the awkward silence. "Damn, the actress playing me was rubbish."

"I never saw it," I admitted "I was upset with what the director did to the ending. There was never supposed to be a happy ending, so I boycotted the thing."

Sandy commented, "There was a lot of suspicion in the press that the book was based on a real story. You did an amazing job of keeping your real identity a secret. There's been speculation about almost everyone in the fashion world being the basis of the characters."

"You did one interview didn't you?" Ali asked. "I'm sure I recall one."

I smiled, recalling all the restrictions I'd placed on the journalist. "Yeah, he's someone I know, and I convinced him to hint in the piece that I was from the States."

"My Daddy is Xander Morton, the author," Julia said in amazement. "That's so cool."

"And you," I asked Ali, "What's your story?"

She glances at her watch and then at Julia, "It's late, and Julia should be in bed. How about we keep my story until we get back to the boat."

I nodded, called Simone over and gave her my credit card. She smiled and gave it back to me. "Since when have we ever charged you?"

"I know, but there more people than usual and I'm paying for that couple over there as well." I indicated Steve and Janice who were sitting at a table on the other side of the terrace.

"Sandy will sort it out, Ben," Ali said dismissively.

"I asked you to join me," I said. "So don't insult me by offering to pay." Ali looked at me, shocked. I got the impression that she was used to getting her way.

I sorted out the bill and said goodbye to Jaap and Simone, and as a group we walked back to the boats. Jamal was waiting for us, and I told him that the lock opened at nine the next morning and I wanted to be first through it.

"We'll be ready," he assured me. Then asked, "How can we guarantee that it's our boat that that goes through with yours?"

"I'll have a word with Simone in the morning. She should be able to call through to the locks and talk to the keepers. They'll do it for her."

Jamal looked relieved and wished me good night.

Only Ali was waiting for me in the salon, "Alwyn's turned in, and I sent Julia to bed," she said. "I thought we could have that talk."

I gestured towards the sofa, "Want a drink?"

She nodded her head, and I poured two glasses of wine. I sat down beside her, and she swung her legs up and curled up beside me with her head resting on my shoulder. I slid an arm around her, and she sighed in contentment.

"So, your story," I prompted.

She turned her head so she could see my face. "After Julia was born I became very depressed. I'd lost you because of my stupidity, and I couldn't tell you about our daughter. Then Ludmila came to see me; do you remember her? She was that model I did the assignment in Mauritius with?"

I vaguely remembered the assignment, but there several models and I couldn't remember which one Ludmila was. "The trip yes, but not Ludmila, I'm afraid," I said.

"Well, it doesn't matter if you don't. She contacted me a couple of months after Julia was born, to see if I was interested in working with her. She wanted to open her own agency, and she was looking for a partner who'd also be willing to do some modeling. I discussed it with our mothers, and they offered to look after Julia if I had to go away on an assignment, so I decided to try it."

"I do remember that suddenly you were everywhere on posters for that Italian lingerie company," I said.

"That was one of the first big contracts we got. It put the agency and me on the global map." She gave me a coy smile, "I thought you said you weren't checking up on me."

"I wasn't, but it's pretty hard to miss a twenty-foot tall photo of a woman wearing only lacy lingerie after they put them up all over the place!"

"There was a fifty-foot version on one of the department stores." She said with a smile.

She shifted slightly to get more comfortable, and I realized I had been unconsciously running my fingers through her long hair. My hand froze, but she whispered, "Don't stop; I love it when you play with my hair."

I forced my fingers to start moving again, and Ali gave my cheek a quick kiss.

"So, how did you end up like this?" I asked.

"I'm not too sure; it just seemed to happen. One contract led to the next and so on. I'd been popular with several of the fashion houses, and they all wanted me for their new shows. Suddenly it seemed I was a household name with one of the most recognizable faces in the world. When I was home, I split my time between my parents and our old flat for the first year, but it was soon to difficult to maintain any degree of privacy for Julia or me. That's when I bought Anderson's place. It's got those walls around the grounds so I could keep the press and fans away."

"Is security the problem that Jamal says it is?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so. There are a lot of nutters out there, Ben, and some of them are dangerous. I've had a couple of close calls, and there are at least half a dozen restraining orders in place. "

"How the hell can you afford all this security?"

"Jamal and his team don't work directly for me; they are contracted to the agency. I own 80% of the agency now. Ludmila sold me her share a few years ago, and of course, now I have my own fashion house. We make and sell clothes, lingerie, swimwear, perfume and makeup under the Ali Mac brand name. I'm rich, I mean we're rich, Ben." She sounded proud of her achievements, worryingly so!

Don't get me wrong; I was pleased that she'd become rich and successful, there was no doubt that I still loved the woman she used to be, but how much of the old Ali was still there?

I was sensitive to the fact that her pursuit of fame and success had been the reason she'd driven a wedge between us in the first place. Now, I heard the same hints of the single-minded fanaticism to succeed that she had exhibited before our break up.

"What do you want from me?" I wondered out aloud. "I don't live a glamorous lifestyle. I made enough from the book to live comfortably, but," and I gestured around us, "not at the level that I guess you expect. I'm sorry Ali, but I don't want to move back to England, I like it here, my livelihood is tied up in this place, and this is where my friends live."

She shook her head, "I don't want you to change, I'll always love you, never mind what! I do want you to have the chance to be part of your daughter's life. I made a mistake; I decided not to let you know about her. I tried to keep Julia away from the public eye. Only a few people ever met her, and I wanted to keep it that way."

"If anyone did find out, I'd suggest that she was the reason you and I split up. I think that at one time or another, half of Hollywood was in the frame as the father. Your parents wanted to tell you; they told me that they had a way of contacting you in an emergency, through your solicitor I believe. I told them if they did try and contact you, I'd never let them see Julia again."

"Why would you do that? I understand why you might hate me; I'm the one that walked away from you, but you've got to admit you made that last six months miserable for me."

"Because it took me some time to realize I was as much, if not more to blame than you. I was depressed and bitter those first few months and when I came out of it and understood what I'd done, it was too late. I didn't want you to come back out of misguided loyalty to your daughter."

"So you stole the chance for me to watch her grow up," I said bitterly.

Ali's voice cracked, "I know I did, and there's no way I can ever make it up to you. I want you to be part of her life from now on. I want to be part of your life. I just need you to understand that I come with a lot of baggage that I can't do much about. Look, I'm sorry, I was all mixed up, and suddenly everyone was fawning over me and telling me how beautiful I was. I just wasn't used to it, and it all went to my head for a while. It was when you weren't there anymore that I realized what was important in my life, and that was you."

"I told you countless times that you were beautiful and I loved you. What was it that they told you that was so different that made you do what you did?"

"I know you did, and I did believe you, but I got myself turned sideways when all those important people kept saying it as well. They didn't say anything that you didn't. What they did do was pander to my ego, let me believe I was more important than I was, something you would never let me get away with. For months I thought you would come back and tell me what an idiot I'd been. I would have begged you to forgive me."

"Why now? And I don't believe your bullshit about not being able to find me. I think Julia sending you that photo forced your hand."

Ali pulled away as she turned to face me. "Of course I had an idea where you were. The moment I read that damn book I knew it was about us. I got my lawyers to threaten the publisher, and they told me you were living down here. They didn't give me your address, but enough details that I could have found you easily enough."

"So why didn't you get in touch then?"

"Because I did read the book, I read it time and time again. I honestly hadn't understood how badly you thought I'd treated you. It was so bittersweet reading about how much we were in love in the beginning, and then the anguish and hatred at the end. I could just imagine what you would have said if I'd turned up and told you about Julia, so I did nothing, and that became easier when I was told that you had another family down here."

"What!!" I exploded. "I don't have a family; you stole that option from me."

Ali cringed away from me, "I know you don't, but that's what I thought for several years. I asked someone to check up on you, and they led me to believe that Pete's wife and children were yours."

"Why would they lie to you?"

"I know now; it's because I'd told everyone at the agency that if I thought you'd have me back I'd drop it all for the opportunity to be with you again. We'd just launched the Ali Mac brand, and too many people had too much invested in it. If I'd gone as I'd threatened, it would have collapsed like a house of cards and ruined them, so they lied to me!"

She'd hinted that she'd known the truth and I wondered how long it had been.

She must have guessed what I am thinking. "I learned the truth a couple of years ago. I bumped into Pete's cousin, Rachel. She was in the same year as me at school, and she'd just come back from a holiday at Pete's. She showed me photos of Pete and his new family. I recognized the woman in the photos as the person I'd been told was your wife. I asked her about them, and Rachel told me about Pete meeting Sophie and that the twins were theirs."

"And you didn't think to try to contact me after you found out the truth?"

"I didn't know how after all these years and there was another problem. I was in an on, off, relationship with one of the people who'd lied to me. The relationship died at that moment, but it took me a long time to get him and his cronies out of my business. I only managed to resolve it earlier this year. I'd been trying to work out how I was going to get in touch with you when Julia forced my hand. If I hadn't agreed to come, she'd have gone chasing off after you on her own."

Christ, I didn't know what to say, I was sure I need to think about it. I was tired and needed to get some sleep. I stood up and made a gesture towards my cabin.

"Ali, I don't know what to tell you! But I do know I need to get some sleep; we've got a long day tomorrow."

"Can I sleep with you?"

I shook my head, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Please, I just want you to hold me. You don't know how much I've missed falling asleep in your arms."

"Obviously not that much! How long has it been, 13 years and you found a replacement quite quickly."

"You bastard," she snapped as she stepped close to me. "I know I made mistakes, that fuckhead, Ricky, was one of the biggest, but walking away from you was so much bigger. I just want you to hold me, that's all. I don't deserve anything more." She started crying, and I couldn't help myself; years of ingrained reflexes kicked in. I put my arms around her, and she sobbed into my chest.

I was sure I was going to regret this, but I led her down the narrow passage to my cabin and unzipped her dress. I refused to remove her bra and panties. She lay down, and I pulled the cover over her. She watched as I undressed, keeping on my boxers. I slid in behind her, and as I had on countless occasions spooned up against her, my free hand resting on the soft skin of her belly.

She sighed and interlaced her fingers with mine, I felt her slowly relax, and her breathing settled as she fell asleep. It didn't take me long to follow her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alwyn and I were up early, in tune with the early morning sounds and smells of the canal. Ali was still fast asleep as I showered and dressed. On the deck, I saw Alwyn coming back from the bakery with fresh bread and croissants for our breakfast. I put the coffee maker on, and soon there was the aroma of freshly brewed coffee.

"Want me to top up the water tank?" Alwyn asked.

I checked the gauges, half full. Christ, we'd been almost full yesterday morning. "Yeah, you better; looks like the women are using a lot. You better leave the hose attached until we leave. I guess they will want to shower again this morning."

"The batteries are full," Alwyn added. "I put them on charge last night."

"Thanks."

We took our coffee and croissants up on deck and watched as the harbor began to wake up. I saw Jamal come up on the deck of his boat. He gave me a wave and then stepped off the boat, carrying a travel mug. I thought he was coming over to us, but I was wrong. He walked over to the trees that ran along the back of the paved area in front of the boats. A figure moved out of the shadows to greet him and took the proffered mug.

"Do you think there was someone out there all night?"

"Looks like it," I said.

Jamal walked over to us, and I motioned for him to come up and join us.

"What time are you looking to get going?" He asked.

"The exit lock opens at nine, and I want to be first in line. There's a flight of seven locks after another kilometer, and they stagger the times you can travel up and down. If we don't make the cut-off at ten-thirty, we'll be stuck at the bottom until after lunch."

Jamal checked his watch, "That gives us an hour, then."

"A bit less; we need to be waiting for the gates to open."

"I'll get my guys ready. I don't suppose you'd let Sandy travel with you during the day?" he asked hopefully.

"She might as well, but she needs to be on board in half an hour."

Jamal stood up, "I'll get her moving then."

"I've got a megastar to get up, as well as a wife."

Jamal laughed as he walked away.

When I went to wake Ali up, I took a mug of coffee with me as a bribe. She grunted when I sat down beside her, then her nose twitched and her eyes opened. She broke into a broad smile and sat up.

"I missed waking up with you like this," she murmured. I kissed her and then pulled the bed cover off her. She gave a brief shriek and tried to pull the cover back over herself.

"You've got half an hour; then we need to get going. There are fresh croissants in the kitchen if you want them. I'm going to see if there's any chance I can get Julia up."