An Affair of Record

"Ok, who do I have to kill?"

"No one, the plan is to persuade. We play the part of Cyrano to Lizzie's intended Roxanne. Hopefully without the tragic ending."

More thinking on Petey's part. I'd done the same thinking already, I knew where this was heading. Petey nodded as he came to the conclusion I was hoping for, he was Lizzie's friend too.

"Who is it? Lizzie's Roxanne I mean."

"CC."

"CC? Why CC?" Petey's eyes flashed to stare at Lizzie without waiting for an answer. "Don't tell me you told her who . . ."

"She already knows she's been a bad girl." I stopped Petey before he could say something he had no right to say. Lizzie was my pet. Any behavioral correction she needed was done by me, and then only when I thought she deserved it. "We need to focus on the future, not the past."

"A marketing campaign?" Petey asked after a few more minutes spent thinking. He knew how Lizzie's and my relationship worked and could probably figure out how close he'd gotten to the line he'd almost crossed.

"Yes. That album is the last step. In the meantime . . ."

I outlined what I wanted him to do. It wasn't that difficult, he only had to go talk to CC and persuade her to set up a special section in her store for local Indie bands. They'd supply their own albums, on consignment, if she'd give them a place on the shelf. We'd allow the condition that she review each album before it went on sale to be sure it was something she wanted in her store. In fact, we'd insist on her doing that as part of the consignment contract. I wanted her preprogramed to listen to the albums from local bands when I gave her Lilly's new album in a few weeks.

In return for shelf space, we would, well, Petey would actually be the one doing it, but we'd get the permits for Friday-night street festivals so the bands could play like they had last Friday, only legally. Any band who wanted to perform had to chip in toward the cost of the permits. There would be no cost to CC or any of the other store owners. There would be no cover charge for admission either. This was what was called a loss leader in the hopes that the audience would like what they were hearing and buy the albums on CC's consignment shelf. We could say so at the end of the evening to be sure they understood.

"Ok. I can do that." Petey was on board with phase one.

"Lilly doesn't sing." That was something she had to not do. She couldn't do it, it would ruin the plan. I looked directly at Lizzie.

"I will lock you in your kennel if I have to. No festival singing. At least not right now."

Lizzie drooped at the tone in my voice. I only rarely got that stern with her but I needed to make this point stick. I petted her on the top of her head gently to reassure her. "Not right now. Later it'll be different, trust me."

"Ok, and what will you be doing?" Petey asked me.

"Nothing." I shrugged in what I hoped appeared totally casual. "Absolutely nothing."

At Petey's confused look I relented enough to explain.

"The point of the campaign isn't to get CC to have a relationship with Lizzie. It's to have her ask me to double the size of my kennel."

The stunned look on both their faces was amusing. I'd have thought they'd have figured it out right up front but apparently I was wrong. Suddenly the look on Lizzie's face disappeared and she yanked her leash loose to tackle me, knocking the chair over as we hit the floor together.

"Lizzie! Get down! Bad girl." I tried to sound angry at her behavior but it was hard to do that and laugh at the same time.

There were glitches in the plan, as I'd expected there to be. Some of the younger bands didn't have the money to chip in. So we compromised with asking the local shops to have tip jars by their cash registers and labeled so everyone knew that it was to offset the costs of the otherwise free concert. Another glitch was that some of the hopefuls already had gigs on Friday nights. We booked them for the first couple of acts and limited their sets to only three songs, that way they could get to their paid gig in time to set up. A third was that someone had to review the unknowns who wanted to take part to be sure they could sing and play. We didn't need an amateur hour of no-hopers screeching and annoying everyone. That task fell to Petey who frowned over it but gave in because he also knew there might be an undiscovered shooting star out there in the weeds.

However, the most important part of the plan succeeded when Petey got CC to open up consignment space. He didn't even have to promise anything to get her to do it.

As for me, I ran in the mornings, sat and sipped my latte afterwards, and watched the neighborhood go by. Just like I always did. I didn't wave or try to say hi or anything whenever I happened to see CC. I had to be forceful with Lizzie at first, telling her to be patient. She was a good girl and obeyed like she'd been trained to do but I knew it was difficult for her; it showed in how poignant her club performances got to be. Petey cautioned her over being too sad in her singing.

The free concerts were hits. The store owners were happy because they were making money from the crowds who came to listen and sometimes shopped afterward. Petey told me that CC was upbeat about the new albums the Indie's were putting on consignment. Life was good. Seven weeks after we started, I told Petey to drop Lilly's album off with CC. It was make or break time.

I saw CC come out of her store the next morning and look across the street at me. I ignored her and dumped the rest of my latte and Lizzie's water in the trash before heading home. I'd already warned Lizzie to not look back as we walked away.

At first I thought we'd missed our target when CC didn't appear. Two days later I was positive we'd let her get away and was wondering how I was either going to fix whatever mistake we'd made, or tell Lizzie we'd failed, when there was a knock at the door. Lizzie looked at me then scampered to the door where she peered through the peephole. She started bouncing on her toes over what she apparently saw.

I opened the door a crack. CC stood there with Lilly's album in her hands. I opened the door another couple of inches.

"I can't." CC blurted the two words out before I could say anything.

"Can't what?" I put enough puzzlement into my voice to be voted mega-actor of the century.

"I can't. Please?" She held up the CD case. When I just looked at her, she thrust it at me. "Please?"

"CC . . . "

"Please!" She shoved the CD case at me again and started to cry. "I can't!"

I counted to three before I swung the door wide open. Lizzie had disappeared into the bedroom like we'd planned, so I was the only one in sight through the open doorway.

"CC, come inside."

She shook her head, still holding the CD case out at arms length as she sobbed.

"I'm not going to allow you to stand in the hallway outside my door where everyone can see you crying." I snapped my fingers and sharply gestured into the apartment. "Come."

CC sniffed and blotted her eyes with the back of one wrist but obeyed my command and walked through my door. Gently I closed it behind her before guiding her to the sofa and sitting down right next to her.

"What's the problem?"

She held up the CD case again. "I can't accept this."

"Sure you can. Put it into consignment and forget about it. Just like you do for all the other albums you get from the independent bands."

She shook her head. "I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because it's a love letter. She sent me a love letter! In nothing but music."

"So? It's who she is and how she thinks. How else would you expect her to tell you how she really feels about you?"

"But I'm not a lesbian. I have a boyfriend."

"Does that mean you don't love Lilly? Or Lizzie?"

She shook her head no and wiped her nose again with one hand while clutching the CD case against her chest with the other. Despite her offering it to me repeatedly she hadn't actually let it out of her hand.

"Well, if that's true, then what's the problem?"

Before she could answer, Lilly's slow alto vocals rolled through the apartment as she began to sing Bob Segar's Turn the Page.

"On a long and lonesome highway,

East of Omaha.

You can listen to the engine,

Moaning out it's one-note song.

You can think about the woman,

Or the girl you knew the night before . . . "

Lizzie stayed in the bedroom, like I'd told her to, but kept singing as CC froze for a second before starting to shake her head no. She was barely able to breathe and started hiccuping in between sobs while Lizzie just kept singing in the other room.

"Now here I am.

On the road again.

There I am.

Up on the stage.

Here I go.

Playing star again.

There I go.

Turn the page."

The consummate performer, Lizzie knew exactly how to heighten her act for maximum impact. As she reached the last chorus, Lizzie appeared from the bedroom right on cue to come up behind us on the sofa. Softly running her fingers carefully down the sides of CC's neck and out along the tops of her shoulders, she finished singing before leaning forward to cup CC's face and tip it upward.

"I'm not a lesbian."

CC repeated herself as she tried to stop the kiss before it started. Lizzie kept leaning and closed her eyes as their lips met. I waited until they were finished before speaking, CC's eyes popping open again at my words.

"Until I met Lizzie I wasn't either."