BBs to Bullets

When she finally slid down on me, it was all I could do not to cum right then. I'm not sure how I managed to avoid it; it was like I wanted to impress a first date by not prematurely ejaculating, I suppose. As she got close to her orgasm, I let go of her tits and grabbed her ass. It's what we'd done many times in this position. The tits may have started the evening, but in the end, we came as we always did. Except for me it was much more intense. Judging from her reaction, it was for her too. I get a bit giddy after sex, and everything always strikes me as funny. The thought that went through my head while she was in my arms was, "This is the best damn investment I ever made."

After that night, we played a lot with those toys. We had to work it in around parenting, but we found the time. Everything we had done sexually before, took on that same feeling of newness. Missionary, I grabbed them. Doggy style, I grabbed them. Her on top, definitely grabbed them.

We even did a tit fuck. She didn't exactly take to it the way I would have liked when we started. Brenda doesn't use profanity, not even in the bedroom. She doesn't mind when other people do, she just doesn't. It happens to be part of my vocabulary when I socialize, as it is with most people in Jersey. Some stereotypes are true. Brenda didn't fit that mold. So dirty sex talk wasn't part of her repertoire.

"You like the way my breasts caress your penis?"

This was something I'd never done before, and I wasn't a bit put off over the fact she thought it was ridiculous. Mostly not put off.

I tried to encourage the response I wanted, not that it mattered in the end, I was loving it. "I love the way my COCK feels, FUCKING your TITS."

She suppressed a laugh. Barely. Then her face went semi-serious.

"You like pushing between these melons?"

"Oh yeah."

"Slide that thing through my cantaloupes. They are yours for the taking."

Okay, a weird compromise involving fruit, but it worked for both of us.

Our sex life had been invigorated, sneaking in fucks while parenting. It was like the opposite of having to sneak fucks as teenagers away from our own parents. It had that same intensity and thrill, aided by years of experience. That should have been perfect. As I mentioned earlier, no one gets perfect. If you asked me what I thought would happen, I would have said my wife would be pleased at the new attention, and I'd be the sole beneficiary. I was, and I wasn't.

The neighborhood get togethers didn't seem to have let the newness of my wife's tits fade into the background for the new shiny thing. The hugs increased. The attention she got from men increased. The "accidental" contact with her boobs increased. One Saturday at our place, one moment showed how everything had changed.

We have a trampoline we bought with the boys in mind. They love it. Brenda loves it as well. She was proud of being agile. This time was different. Now when Brenda jumped, so did her boobs. Suddenly a common occurrence no one previously really payed attention to, had eyes locked on every bounce. It's a miracle applause didn't break out.

The stories she told from work were constantly about new opportunities and greater appreciation. She would mention her boss, Alan Harrison, had begun to compliment her on her work. I really tried to be accepting of it. Alan Harrison was an old coot that I knew Brenda on her worst day would never have sex with. We laughed about it. Still ... there were some moments that had me on full alert. One was when I came home early after a cancellation.

When I arrived, Stu and Brenda were there. No one acted awkwardly, as though I'd interrupted anything. It all seemed on the up and up. Still, Stu made his exit quickly. If it had been innocent, why would he do that?

After going through some normal conversation, I started fishing. "So ... what were you and Stu talking about?" I was trying to keep the suspicion out of my voice. I don't think I succeeded.

"He was talking to me about my implants. He's been talking to Debbie about them."

"Why isn't Debbie over here asking?"

"It's an awkward subject Vince. He doesn't want to offend her by suggesting it, even though he thinks Debbie would love it."

I had to admit that sounded reasonable. I also thought it was reasonable that Stu was taking an interest in my wife that was no longer casual. Six in one hand, half a dozen in the other.

This was just another one of those things. It wasn't the fact she got attention, it was the way she responded to it that had my Spidey sense tingling. She didn't shut it down. She encouraged it. She hadn't done anything to show it would go beyond that, but she never gave any indication that there was a line somewhere that shouldn't be crossed. It's not that anyone did anything questionable, it's just that it seemed things were slowly escalating and I wasn't comfortable.

I did bring it up, albeit not forcefully. It was awkward. "Honey, I'm happy you are getting the attention you always wanted. I am a bit bothered though, that you don't draw a line on the flirtation. I'd like to hear you say you are loyal to your husband from time to time. No wait, not loyal. In love with your husband." Yup. Awkward.

It was like I'd slapped her. She looked distraught for a moment, then said, "Honey, I am in love with you. I can't believe you question that. I am yours. No flirting I do will ever go anywhere. If I've done something that made you uncomfortable, tell me and I'll be sure not to do it again."

The thing was, there was no one thing I could point to. I felt bad. I saw the look in Brenda's eyes and knew I'd been responsible for that. I immediately embraced her, and just kissed her like it was a third date. We had a great night of sex. It was only in hindsight I realized that she hadn't agreed to draw a line in public. She was asking me where the line was, and I hadn't given it to her. However, she had made her case that her flirtations meant nothing.

It wasn't completely what I wanted. Yet I had gotten her reassurance. Thinking about it for the next few days, I hoped that conversation would somehow be enough. Still, I had a lingering sense of apprehension.

I kept my unease mostly hidden. Brenda still treated me and the kids the same way she always had, and sex continued to be great. She continued to talk about her days at work, her interactions with people, etc. But something was different. My feelings of apprehension just grew to the point where, for the first time in our marriage, I felt threatened. I wrestled with that feeling. While on the surface nothing had changed, I just couldn't shake the feeling that this was the calm before the storm.

During the summer we went to Atlantic City. It's something we did every year. The boys did their thing, we usually watched and took time to talk when they were chasing seagulls or trying to drown each other. This year, she was literally turning heads as we walked onto the beach. Her new bikini definitely showed off her new treasures.

No one approached us, but it was the looks. There were so many looks. Brenda read my face as she noticed I was aware. Playfully she said,"Honey, it's just like a laser pointer to a cat. It's a response wired into men, remember?"

Did I ever. Nothing like having your own words recalled to put things into perspective. I just laughed. Although at one point, I found myself looking at a woman with a flat chest. She reminded me of happier times. I shook that off and we had a pleasant day. I had nothing to bring up, except what would likely be seen as unreasonable paranoia. I wasn't certain that would have been wrong. Yet in my gut, I felt something was off.

Once a month she had a girls' night out and I had a boys' night out. I guess that's the best way to explain it. It wasn't that our partners weren't allowed to come, it was more like I did stuff she wasn't interested in and she did stuff I wasn't interested in. Sometimes those nights happened at the same time, more often they didn't.

The night I decided to check on my suspicions, coincided with both the girls and boys night out. Mom was at the house with the kids. I excused myself from the boys' night at the sports bar. I felt like the worst husband ever, checking up on a woman who had never given me any reason to doubt her. I didn't want her to know I was checking up on her. So I picked a disguise. I wore a New York Giants hat, dressed in a Hawaiian shirt I'd never wear, and put on sunglasses. If anything was going on, I wanted to witness it without being witnessed.

I've mentioned Brenda can dance. She loves to dance. I don't. So sometimes the girls would go dancing on their night out. Since all the husbands shared my aversion to dancing, we were fine with it. All the wives always came home on time and intact, so there was no reason for worry. The night I chose to spy on Brenda, and I can't think of any other word, she was at "The Cosmopolitan." There aren't many places to dance in our town, this was one of three. One was a country place, one was a dance club. This place played "swing music," on Saturday nights.

So in my disguise, I walked into The Cosmopolitan. I looked for the group, and while I was looking, Lisa Evans came up to me and said, "Vince! Did you come to join us?"

Damn. So much for my careful disguise. "Yes, I just decided I didn't want to play poker tonight. I wanted to do something more active."

That sounded so lame. Here I was in my disguise, justifying my appearance here. I felt like a CIA agent whose cover has been blown. Lisa didn't seem to think anything of it.

"It's great you're here Vince, let's get our dance on!"

She took my hand and guided me through the crowd. I took my hat and sunglasses off on the way there. This had the potential for humiliation as it was. Lisa brought me to the group table and announced, "Look who I found!" Everyone was there, the band was on break and no one was on the dance floor.

Almost everyone seemed welcoming. I didn't get any kind of feeling I was crashing anything forbidden. The "almost" was Brenda. She didn't seem unhappy, but she did seem a bit wary. I wasn't sure what to make of that. She did kiss me and say, "I'm so glad you're here. What a nice surprise." It sounded good. There was just something in her eyes I couldn't decipher.

After I took a position at the table and we all exchanged meaningless banter, Brenda said, "What made you decide to drop in?"

"Just a whim. I didn't feel like hanging with the guys tonight, I decided I wanted to be with you."

"Oh honey, that is so sweet. When the band comes back, let's dance."

The band returned. Then the unexpected happened. As they were walking back onstage, four men approached our table. It seemed there was one their for each wife, just waiting for the band to start up again so they could hit the dance floor. One of those four was clearly Brenda's partner.

While I was processing, she spoke first. "Trent, I'm sorry but your dance will have to wait."

I knew she danced with people these nights. I was fine with it. It wasn't anything unexpected and she politely let him know who I was, and that I had dibs. It didn't even bother me he was better looking than I was, it was all good. Until he spoke.

"Okay baby, let me know when your dance card is free."

"I certainly will. If it opens up, you'd better be here. I'm holding you to that."

He grinned, then Trent left and returned to wherever he came from.

Baby?

He called her "baby." That was the thought going through my head when the band started to play. Brenda grabbed my hand and led me to the dance floor. All the other wives and their partners went as well. I'm not a good dancer. Swing dancing is not the best showcase for a mediocre dancer. I gave it my all though, and pushed thoughts of Trent aside. Brenda knows I'm not a good dancer, so she made her adjustments so I could feel I was leading. We got through it.

While people applauded, Brenda shouted, "Ready for another?"

I wasn't. My thoughts had returned to me after the dance ended. Baby. He called her "baby." She didn't call him "baby" back though. Yet he felt he could call her that. That was a bit of familiarity I wasn't sure I was comfortable with.

I shouted back, "Let's go back to the table. It's been a while for me honey, let me regroup."

She just smiled and led the way back to the table. The other wives were still on the dance floor, so we were alone.

"What's with the hat and the shirt?"

Busted. I could have been honest. I wasn't. "I don't know honey, I got a wild hair up my ass and wanted to be in a party mood. I guess I didn't pull it off."

"Honey, you are the party. I love when you dance with me. That outfit is horrible, by the way. I love how you always dress up. But if you like it, I am down with it. You wanna "hang loose," you've got the right woman."

All the right words. I felt lower than dirt right then. I also felt elated. Elation was winning. Then Trent returned just as the band started up again.

"Is your dance card free?"

Brenda looked at me, "Honey?"

I had just pulled her off the dance floor. What could I say? I said, "You get your dance on honey."

I watched Trent and Brenda dance. Trent was a good dancer. They looked good together. She liked to dance, he was a good dance partner. Still ... baby.

The band went into their next song. She hadn't returned to our table. It seemed like the first song they had just been warming up. This song they were even more in sync. They knew each others' moves. It was swing dancing, not the most erotic form of dancing, but it can be. There's potential. That second song and dance put certain body parts in close proximity.

Then came the third dance. I was still alone at the table. The other wives were still dancing. I did look at them from time to time, and they just seemed to be dancing. There was nothing erotic about it. Neither was Brenda's first two dances, although they suggested potential. The third dance was borderline erotic.

If they were in sync on the second dance, they seemed to be sharing the same brain on the third. Every move was perfect. Everything was done without a care in the world, except to dance. All body parts were touched in the service of dance moves. Brenda looked incredibly sexy. So did Trent, although I don't swing that way. I could see other eyes on them. They clearly were the standouts.

When that song ended, Lisa came back to the table.

"Vince, I'm wiped out. I need a break. You having fun?"

"Well I was, but I've been waiting three songs for Brenda to return."

Lisa was a bit drunk. "She's heading here now, she's a great dancer."

"Yes, she is."

Brenda and Trent both came back. Brenda said, "Vince, this is Trent. Trent, this is Vince."

I extended my hand and said, "Nice to meet you Trent."

He shook my hand and said, "Nice to meet you too Lance." Obviously Trent wasn't a great listener. "You're one lucky guy. Thanks for letting me dance with your lady. She's a great dancer."

"She sure is. You're good as well."

"I hold my own." Then he turned to Brenda, "Let me know if you want another dance, no one dances like you."

"You say that to all the girls baby."

Trent laughed. "True, but I mean it with you baby."

Then he left again to the part of the place he came from.

Baby. She called him that as well. It was too much. I didn't care that Lisa was there. I looked at her after he left and said, "Baby?"

She had been happy before that. Now she looked serious. She didn't pretend to not know what I was talking about. "Did that bother you?"

"Yes it did. He called you 'baby' and even worse, you called him 'baby' as well."

She didn't say anything for a moment. Then she said, "It's flirtation. I don't call anyone else 'honey.' That's for us. Everyone uses 'baby,' it's not a special term. I call everyone 'baby' here. So does he. It's not some kind of connection between us."

Reasonable. So very reasonable. Three dances, each bringing them closer than the last, and baby. All perfectly reasonable. Except, she'd never used that term before. She'd never had three dances in a row before. I'd never seen that level of contact before. All reasonable. Lisa had been silent this whole time, her attention was on the dance floor. I just grabbed Lisa and kissed her, my hand feeling her boob. I was really expecting to be slapped, Lisa just kissed me back. I was the one that broke it off.

I turned to Brenda and said, "If this is what you want, two can play that game. I'm not interested. I'm going home. You do what you want."

I turned away and walked quickly out of the club. I didn't even look to see if Brenda was following me. I just got in my car and drove home. Mom was surprised to see me early, but I talked her as briefly as possible. This wasn't easy, as Mom liked talking. She enjoyed being part of our lives. I hinted strongly that she should leave. She sensed something was wrong, but she did leave two minutes before Brenda arrived in a huff. She wasted no time.

"What the frick just happened? You felt Lisa up? You kissed her? You're mad at me?"

Now she was hopefully getting it. She'd just needed a demonstration. I said calmly, "Once we cross lines, they lead to crossing more lines. Watching you and Trent dance was like watching two people making love. You ignored me for three dances, and when you came back, let him know you were up for more."

"I like dancing! You don't. He's a good dancer. It doesn't mean I want to have sex with him. I just like dancing. You seem to think that everything that happened tonight, means I'm going to cheat on you. Why?"

She clearly didn't see the path she was on. It was time for plain speaking. I'd been avoiding the issue, but she needed to hear a hard truth.

"I see how this all ends. It starts with dancing. You call someone other than your husband by a term of endearment. Then, you get invited by your boss to the Adirondacks. You fuck him because he suddenly appreciates you, and I wind up burning a bridge and leaving you stranded."

"What? Where do you come up with this stuff? You've gone nucking futs!"

"Answer me this Brenda, are the kids even mine?!"

Her mouth just hung open. It was quiet for probably just a few seconds, but it seemed like forever. I had no idea why I said that. I tried to release the tension, "look Brenda-"

That was as far as I got. She turned away from me and went to the bedroom. I didn't follow her. I did realize I was losing my shit here. I definitely had legitimate concerns, but I had just accused her of being untrustworthy our entire marriage. I just sat down on the couch and waited. I wasn't sure for what.

The "what" was Brenda emerging from the bedroom an hour later with a suitcase.

"I am going to Mom's. Right now I don't want to talk to you for a few days."

So many thoughts raced through my brain. I didn't tell her to stay. I didn't apologize. "What do I tell the boys?"

"I'll call them. I'll tell them I need some time away."

"How long?"

"I don't know."

Then she left. She was seething. I swear I could feel heat radiating off her body.

I was faced with the awkward task of telling Luke and Chris that their mother was going to be gone for a while at Gandmama's house. As much as I portray them as indifferent brats, they were concerned. It was a hard night. I assured them that their mother loved them, that I loved them, and this was "adult stuff," they'd understand when they got older. I never liked that explanation when I was their age, yet I found myself saying the same unsatisfying nothing my parents had said to me.

I did manage to calm things down on the home front. Worse was coming. Chaos had once again intruded on my life, and I wasn't sure what the cause was. I couldn't leave it at home. While Brenda was away, I couldn't concentrate on anything else. That included work. The place I was always professional. The place I always shut off my thoughts and concentrated on my patients and job.