Beacon of Love 04: Affirmative Consent

4: Affirmative Consent

I spent the day exploring the island, trying to shelter myself from the overwhelming tide of sexual inadequacy. Jacques and Skipper remained two peas in a pod. He even made her a bracelet with some sailor knot I hadn't learned yet. I was sure they must be making fun of me. I was already a freshman and a virgin; now I was questioning my sexuality too. I doubted if Skipper would want a three-way anyhow. So it came as quite the surprise when I returned to the lighthouse that afternoon, only for Skipper to greet me with a deep, passionate tongue-ring kiss.

"Good to see you too," I suavely remarked, "but if this is an invitation to have a three-way, I think I'll pass."

"Actually, Jacques and I were talking, and we think we've come up with a compromise that might appeal to you."

"What's that?"

"An exercise for your soul," Skipper vaguely alluded.

"Consider this," Jacques expounded. "If you're not comfortable with me yet, I understand. You still only like girls. That's fair, but you nonetheless need to make peace with your own feminine energy. So I propose that you submit yourself to Skipper as your mistress. She'll be the only one to touch you, but she'll do it in a way that activates your femininity and sets you free."

"Affirmative consent every step of the way," Skipper assured me, playing with her tongue ring to entice me. She knew me too well. "Deal?"

"Affirmative consent..." I seriously considered. I felt in control. I trusted Skipper. She knew how badly I'd always wanted her... bad enough to commit. "Aye aye, Skipper!"

"There's one more thing," Jacques continued.

"What's that?"

"When I said Foucault had it all figured out," Jacques unrolled a bag full of drugs, "I was including his stance on psychedelics."

"No way."

"Come on!" Skipper encouraged me. "We're gonna candy flip--that's LSD and MDMA at the same time!"

"Can't I just have the sex and skip the drugs?" I implored.

"Suit yourself." Skipper took two pills out of the bag and sent them down the hatch. Jacques took three.

"What's the third pill for?"

"It keeps the other two from making my dick soft."

"Yeah, so... what do we do now?"

"We've set a little station up for you in the lighthouse proper. Come with us, babe." No man had ever called me that before. It kinda turned me on, if I'm being honest. Inside at the base of the lighthouse silo, there was a lone, open-frame chair set up with chains attached to the armrests. It was a stark, intimidating, utilitarian space, never designed for comfort. Jacques ascended the spiral stairs up the phallic tower to watch Skipper feminize me from above. Who's the stair cuck now?

"Sit down," Skipper commanded with dominance, discarding her sports bra on the floor, leaving only a tiny thong covering her shaven vagina. It didn't leave much to the imagination.

"Aye aye, Skipper," I complied. In the chair, she affixed chains to my wrists, like bracelets, sealing them with one-way clips that couldn't be undone. A second chain attached each wrist chain to the arms of the chair. I wasn't going anywhere.

Skipper sashayed behind me where I couldn't see what she was up to, just to tease me with suspense. She whispered in my ear from behind. "You look so cute in this ratty crop-top with your midriff showing. Such smooth, soft, hairless skin... Let's get in touch with your inner girl..."

She took off her choker, stretched it as far as it would go and clamped it tightly around my neck. What fun! Feminization isn't so scary, is it? What's next? Nail polish? Eye shadow? Is being a girl just pretending you're in Green Day every morning? I don't know why I'd been so nervous about doing this.

Skipper straddled my lap, tucking her legs under the armrests and pushing her naked breasts right up in my face. I couldn't get enough of that barbell in my mouth. She massaged my tongue with it vigorously. I even strained my wrists instinctively pulling up to embrace her. The restraints added a whole new dimension I'd never considered. I wasn't in control, but God was I hard, so hard she must've felt it. We were pelvis-to-pelvis. I began thrusting between her legs. She leaned in for traction. Anymore and I would've blown. Skipper knew what she was doing, though, and stopped just short. Was this it, I wondered? Was I finally about to get the fuck laid!?

"You have a choice to make," Skipper informed me.

"I'll do whatever you want, Skipper."

"No, you have to choose. I'm giving you some jewelry. It can be dainty, or it can be tough."

"I saw Jacques give you that necklace yesterday. It looked tough on him, but dainty on you. So I guess I don't care either way."

"What an insightful answer... Let's see how it looks on you!" Skipper took the chain off of her neck and put it onto mine. "Wicked sexy... I think you can pull off tough guy after all. Jacques! Bring out the tray!"

Jacques descended with a tray full of surgical needles, tapers and large-gauge jewelry. "I figure if you pierce him at an eight, you can stretch him to a four and make base-camp there," he suggested.

"Oh hell no!" I objected. "I do not consent!"

"Told you he'd chicken out," Skipper chided. "You should see him during capsize drills. He's afraid of the water!"

"Come on, those needles will fuck up my body for life!"

"Fine, fine. I guess you do care. Dainty it is. I'm sure you can handle little diamond studs like mine."

"Yeah, that's totally different though."

"You don't say yeah to Skipper," She disciplined me, "What do you say?"

"Aye aye, Skipper."

Not a second later, a needle plunged through my right ear. It was totally unexpected. She came at me left-handed! "Good girl..." Skipper teased me. It was hot more than it hurt. I could hear it throbbing up close.

"No fair!" I whined. "That was a trap. I didn't realize what I was consenting to!"

"Stop being a baby," she said, taking the bottom stud out of her own thrice-pierced earlobe. She loaded it into the back of the needle in my ear and pushed it the rest of the way through. "See, it's already done. It looks cute."

"That's the gay ear!"

"If it bothers you that much, we'll just do the other one to even it out."

"But I don't wanna do the other one!"

"Then you don't have to. You can keep just the gay ear."

I didn't know what to do. Jacques brought over a handheld mirror so I could see. I looked like a girl. I had a trashy crop-top, an earring, shiny chains on my wrists and a choker around my neck. The damage was already done. Another piercing would just even me out. I let out a sigh and submitted. "Aye aye, Skipper."

The second piercing hurt more. I think probably because I saw it coming, and knew what to expect. Again, Skipper took the bottom stud out of her other ear and pushed it through mine, satisfyingly clipping the butterfly wings in back. "All done."

"That wasn't so bad," I relented. I had to be honest, I looked great in the mirror with both done. Effeminate, but not in a bad way. The guys at the dorm would probably ride me for it, but I was suddenly over that whole bullshit macho scene. Maybe Jacques was right. The strangest sensation about getting pierced was that it's permanent. I'd never done anything permanent before, and I wondered how I'd feel about it when I'm old. So far, so good.

"Ear piercing is called karnavedha in Hinduism. It's one of sixteen samskaras every Brahman goes through in life, like Christian sacraments. Now that the light shines through your ears, you can hear the cosmic Om."

"Cosmic Om? I'm still not sold on all this eastern spiritualism. Besides, what about you? How will you hear the Om if I'm wearing your studs?"

"I'll wear these," Skipper picked up one of the tapers from the tray. She unchained my bracelets from the chair so I could use my hands again. "You just have to help me put them in."

"I don't know, Skip. You just took a Canadian fuckton of drugs. I don't think you're in the right head-space to make that decision right now."

"I know, it's just kicking in now!" Skipper kissed me and whispered in my ear. "I signed a half dozen blank consent forms this morning. I can do whatever I want!" She put the taper in my hand. "Just give it a little lube and push it through, baby. I can take it."

"But why? I don't get the point of destroying your body like that."

"It's not about destruction; it's about divine transcendence! Union with the universal Brahman! Why do you think the Buddha's ears were so big? He was a Brahman prince! Now tear me apart like Shiva!"

I still didn't understand. The taper was enormous. I literally couldn't wrap myself around putting something that thick through an earlobe. I'd never understood the appeal of stretching. I guess I hadn't thought about it much. Alas, here I was doing it, and I'd never been hornier. I lined up the shot for her left earlobe. Skipper was meditative, present, but somehow on a different plane. She kept her eyes open and waited.

Jacques was masturbating up the spiral stairs, but who was I to judge? I literally did the same thing when our roles were reversed. "Do it, pussy!" He opined from the peanut gallery.

I pushed as hard as my thumb could push. Skipper gasped immediately and squeezed her legs around my lap. Her eyes opened wide with sensual awakening. "Keep pushing!" I gave it another squeeze and made Skipper cry. "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God! That fucking HURTS!"

"I'm sorry," I panicked. "I knew this was a bad idea, and the drugs, and--"

"--No, the drugs are fantastic," she panted. "That just hurt like a bitch."

"Should I hold off on the other one?"

"I want it..." she reaffirmed as I raised the next taper to her right ear. She instinctively pulled away, still crying from the last stretch. "...I just can't take the pain." She looked me in the eyes as if to beg for mercy. Her pupils were dilated. The acid was kicking in, and she was terrified.

"What are you waiting for?" Jacques called down from his perch up the tower. "Stretch out her other hole already!"

"But she doesn't want to! She can't take the pain!"

"Oh, she wants it. She signed consent forms, which is more consent than you gave her when she pierced you. Don't make her walk around with only one stretched ear. Finish the job. She'll thank you later once the molly kicks in."

Skipper was sobbing uncontrollably, her face bright red with anguish. She sputtered to speak, but couldn't get a word out. It felt depraved, yet also empowering.

"Ram it through the hole, sailor," Jacques commanded. "That's an order."

"Is this what you really want?" I whispered.

"Rape me," she muttered back.

"Aye aye, Skipper."

I went in for the kill. She instinctively pulled her ear away again, but I grabbed a hold of it and forced the taper through. She wailed in agony, tears streaming down her face as her sensitive earlobe flesh was permanently torn open from the inside. She thrust her pelvis right into my horny cock and orgasmed right then and there. I couldn't understand how enough pain could turn to pleasure. Yet there it was happening, right on my lap.

Next thing I knew, Skipper was sticking her tongue in my mouth again. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" She raved between aggressive smooches. I guess the orgasm helped the ecstasy kick in. And I had to admit, she looked great with steel tunnels in her ears. It was a tough look, but just like the necklace, it amplified her natural energy rather than defined it. She was still undeniably feminine, perhaps even moreso. She now had six piercings between her two earlobes, two of them stretched, plus a helix on her left side and a daith on her right. Her beaming smile complete the look. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome," I smiled back. "You look wicked sexy."

"Now it's my turn to pierce you again. Something lower and more adventurous..."

"No way, I'm not piercing my tongue, nipples or cock. No consent, no take-backs. That's final."

"Fair play. They're off the table then. But I couldn't help notice you left one out..." Skipper started teasing my navel with her finger. I wanted to correct my omission, but she put her other finger up to my mouth to shush me. "Don't say no, baby. Your navel is your third chakra, Manipura. It's the jewel chakra of self-discovery. Let me play with it. Let it feel real."

"Okay," I reluctantly agreed, admittedly turned on by the prospect of Skipper teasing me with live ammunition. Not that I would really let her do it. I was still fully sober, and I hadn't signed anything. "But this time, no playing it fast and loose with the affirmative consent, okay?"

"Of course, baby. You're in full control. I promise I won't do it unless you say the magic words." Skipper clipped some forceps from the tray onto the top of my navel.

"okay... hey, if the base of the spine is the first chakra and the navel is the third, then where's the second?"

Skipper dismounted me and pulled down my gym shorts and boxers, finally bringing my dick into the game. "Where do you think?" She kissed it and licked it with her tongue ring, but didn't put it inside her mouth. "You want this, baby? Don't be afraid. You want me to suck your cock?"

"Fuck yeah!"

"Uh-uh, baby. If you want your dick sucked, you know what you have to do..." She kept kissing my dick, rolling a needle between her fingers. She moved up my pelvis and stroked my clamped navel with her tongue. "...Just say the words and let it happen, baby. You know you want to."

I really did want to, but I resisted. No way the guys in the dorm would let this one slide, even if the earrings were benign enough. Society would never let me have a belly ring, no matter how badly I wanted it. It was just too depraved and emasculating. How could I ever?

"Inhale hard," Jacques instructed me from behind, holding a little glass bottle up to my nose. Technically he wasn't touching me, as per our agreement, though this was still a little too close for comfort. Without asking, I inhaled hard on what I later learned are called poppers. I held in the chemical smell as long as I could, then exhaled. I felt lightheaded. Relaxed. Wicked sexy.

"You want it, baby?" Skipper asked again, running her tongue ring up and down my shaft.

This time I was ready. "Aye aye, Skipper!"

Everything slowed down to halftime. It must've been the poppers. She lined the needle up with my belly button and looked me in the eye. She asked again. "Is this really what you want, babe?"

I huffed some more poppers. I couldn't say no. "Rape me."

Penetration! Oh, the depravity! It hurt much worse than my ears. She forced the needle up through my navel without reservation, following it with a small curved barbell like her own. Seeing it come out the other side was a real head-fuck. God, what have I done!? Skipper screwed on the bead and the deed was done. I was officially a fuck-boy.

Skipper was panting with excitement, the candy flip fully seducing her. "Now that's wicked sexy..." She blew some poppers for herself and went down on me, this time fully engulfing my cock. Her tongue ring was even wilder from the inside, transiting up and down my shaft inside her warm, succulent mouth. God, I'd waited so long for this. It was the blowjob I'd always dreamed of! I blew some more poppers excitedly, only to feel myself losing firmness. What the fuck was happening?

"Careful with those poppers!" Jacques cautioned. "It happens to me too. They make you soft. Take some of my boner pills in the bag over there. That'll set you right."

I scrambled through the bag, but there were at least three different kinds of pills, and I couldn't tell which was which. I could have asked for clarity, but Skipper just seemed so damn excited to gobble my cock, flaccidity be damned. I wanted to feel that excited too. I already had my belly pierced like a freak. In for a penny. In for a pound? Fuck it. I'll have what she's having. I took all three types of pills and put them down the hatch: boner pills, LSD & MDMA. This drug-fueled orgy was my big break--I'm coming, Skipper!