Beer As An Excuse

A short story about a bisexual man and his neighbor next door.

*****

"We must be drunk," my neighbor said after he did a double-take over what I had just said, and while we had a lot to drink over the course of the day both at the golf course and afterward in my backyard, Jim wasn't drunk but using beer as an excuse and that was fine by me because so was I.

"So what? It's a truth serum," I said, giving a little slur of my own for effect before continuing my line of questioning. "You mean never - not one time in your life - you never had the urge to do it?"

"Nope," Jim said with a degree of confidence I had doubted when I first asked the question.

"You never had the urge to think about what it would be like?" I asked, and Jim shushed me while looking back towards the house where our wives were no doubt yakking, the air having gotten too cool for them out in the yard. "Never back in school? There was never a guy that you thought to yourself - I would like to suck his cock just to see what it would be like?"

"No. And you have?" Jim challenged, and although it was risking quite a bit to admit it, I used the beer as my fall-back in case this blew up in my face.

"Sure, and back in the day I did it a few times," I confessed while Jim's jaw dropped. "I don't regret it either."

"I think you're bullshitting me," Jim said while draining his beer and missing badly when he attempted to throw it in the waste basket. "Who's more macho than you?"

"Sucking a cock doesn't make you any less a man, and I contend that it's a perfectly natural thing to do, or at least consider," I said.

"Does Marcy know you're - that way?" Jim inquired. "She knows you did that?"

"Sure. Hell, she experimented with women back in the day too," I said, hoping my wife didn't mind that I threw her in like that but it was true, and if my neighbor knew that if my wife could ever get his wife in the sack she would in a heartbeat, but Jim's wife was not only cold towards him but toward everybody these days, and my wife had tried.

"Marcy?" Jim said, his interest piqued as much as mine did when that subject arose because I'm very open-minded. "Holy shit."

"You still contend that you would never suck another man's dick though?" I asked, and when he nodded I added, "And if another guy wanted to suck your cock you wouldn't let him?"

"Well, that's different," Jim said, putting on a little macho act that didn't fit his accountant look and personality. "You know what they say. A stiff dick has no conscience."

"So if I told you I wanted to suck your cock, that would be okay with you?" I said, taking a step towards Jim as I spoke.

"Yeah sure, go ahead," Jim said, knowing I wouldn't do it, but I grabbed him by the belt buckle and led him over around the side of the tool shed.

"What are you..." Jim mumbled after I moved him up against the shed and out of sight from anyone.

"Showing you how easy it is," I said, and when I started to undo his belt in preparation of dropping his pink golf pants, he started to realize that I was serious.

"No. Wait. Please," Jim said as his eyes bulged while I flipped open his belt, and there was actual terror in his eyes when he know that I wasn't kidding. "I can't - please don't Dave."

"Hey Jim, relax. I'm not going to hurt you. Far from it."

"Please," Jim whined as our eyes were glued in on each others - his were actually welling with tears in the moonlight, but I didn't need to see in order to flick open the hook that held his trousers up, and we could both hear them hit the ground.

"It's okay babe. I know why you're afraid, and it isn't because of what's going to happen," I said as I prepared to go down onto my knees. "It's okay. I've seen you naked before."

"What? How?" Jim asked, wondering how I had managed to do that even though he refused to take a shower at the golf club or even pee at urinals, but I've made getting to see people undressed an art form, and was already aware of why Jim was insecure and it only added to his desirability in my eyes.

"It's okay, and obviously I liked what I saw," I assured my forty four year old neighbor who was trembling like a kid on his first date. "You don't need to reciprocate either."

Our eyes were still locked into each other's, and even in the near darkness I could see him wince as I reached into the fly of his boxers and took hold of his penis, which seemed to be retreating in fright. As for me, I was in heaven, because while I know my men are attracted to other men because of their size, I'm not sure if there are many guys like I am about the subject because I love smaller guys.

"Nice," I whispered as my index finger and thumb massaged the timid little toadstool, and then I was going down to my knees, only letting go of Jim's dick long enough to ease his boxer shorts down.

Jim's knees were knocking together as I grabbed his dick again, giving it a couple of pulls with my right hand while rubbing his balls with my left. His nut sack had also shriveled up in fright, but knew that would change soon so I patiently rubbed the taut pouch before leaning forward.

Like sucking a thumb. That was what old Father Crump had told me that day after altar boy practice when he offered what he considered a gift to me, and Jim's cock was much like Father Crump's as far as size goes, although Jim was circumsized.

I let my mouth take in the modest toadstool and just sucked on it without moving my lips since there was little to work with, but as I suckled on his dick I could feel my neighbor start to relax and as he did things started to happen.

"Not so bad, is it?" I mumbled when I finally took my mouth off of his now-erect dick long enough to suck on his balls, which had loosened up nicely, but Jim was too busy squirming around against the wall of my shed to answer.

Some men are growers and others are show-ers and as I ran my lips down the length of his shaft and right down to the light brown curls above it I realized that Jim was neither. My wife had told me that Jim had a small dick - that information coming by way of his wife - and while I admit it was even smaller erect than I had imagined that didn't matter to me a bit and besides he was as hard as blue steel.

As my lips ran up and down his dick, toying with the tip of the glans before slamming my mouth down to the stump and sucking savagely on it as if I was trying to pull it off of him, I wondered how many sexual opportunities Jim had let pass over the years because of his insecurity and self-doubt, but my musings were interrupted when my neighbor seemed to be trying to shimmy up the wall of the shed.

He was cumming and trying to get away, but that wasn't about to happen. I leaned forward, pressing him against the wood while he clawed at my scalp, and then I felt his dick jerking in my mouth, sending volley after volley of his hot seed against the roof of my mouth and down my throat.

I was betting that even when his cold wife sucked his cock - IF she sucked it - she probably pulled away and finished him off by hand but that wasn't my style. I loved the sensation of a man ejaculating in my mouth, and even after Jim's seemingly endless orgasm ended I didn't let up.

Jim went limp but I was not going to let the night end yet so I kept sucking, wondering whether this middle-aged accountant was a one and done man or was able to rebound. It took a while, but I was patient, licking and sucking and stretching out that dick with my lips as far as I could and eventually my hard work was rewarded.

Jim got hard - not as rock hard as before - but hard enough, and when he came at long after it wasn't in the form of the machine gun blasts but more a lazy spurt or two, helped along by my twisting his hairless pouch roughly as he came, and then it was over.

"You okay?" I asked as I looked at my friend, with tears trickling down his cheeks, but all he did was nod before reaching forward to give me a hug.

"Thank you," Jim said softly, his voice more like a sob, but our moment was interrupted by the sound of the house's screen door sliding open and Jim's wife calling out for him.

Jim hurriedly yanked up his pants and got himself together, and seconds later we came around the shed while I talked about him being nice to offer to help me paint the thing come fall.

"You about ready to head home?" Jim's wife asked him, and he obiediently nodded, giving me a pat on the shoulder and thanking me for a great day.

"It was great for you. You beat me by three strokes," I reminded him, and then the not-so-happy couple were gone.

***

I assumed the wind might be kicking up outside and the storm we had been threatened with had arrived, but that sound that woke me up was not a branch hitting the side of the house but more a tapping, and when I climbed out of bed to see what was happening I saw a familiar face on the other side of the window.

I put on slippers and tiptoed out of the bedroom, grateful that our houses were secluded enough to allow me to go outside in my boxer shorts. Jim had a bathrobe on, and when I stepped outside and asked him what was wrong he started walking towards the tool shed.

"I came over before but when I was outside your bedroom it sounded like you and Marcy were - you know?"

"Yeah," I answered, tempted to tell Jim that after I told Marcy what had gone on in the back yard it made her so hot she practically tore me to shreds.

"Must be nice," Jim said wistfully while looking over at his dark house. "Anyway, I wanted - needed to come clean with you."

"How so?" I asked.

"Before. I mean way before, when you asked me whether I had ever thought about sucking a guy off? I was lying."

"Oh?" I replied, not surprised at all at hearing that.

"Not only hadn't I thought about it, but I had done it. A lot, but not lately. When I was young." Jim confessed, his revelations seeming to make him relax a little. "I was ashamed to admit it to you for fear you would think I was..."

"Bisexual is the word," I said.

"I was always afraid you would hate me if you ever knew, but hearing you tell me and then after what you did, I couldn't lie to you any more."

"It's okay," I said, putting my hand on his shoulder and giving it a squeeze. "I understand."

"I also wanted to tell you that ever since I moved in next door I've wanted to..."

"Go ahead," I said while watching Jim sweat.

"I've been very attracted to you," Jim finally blurted out. "When we started to play golf and you would change clothes and take a shower, I would sneak looks at you and want so bad to let you know how I felt, and maybe join you in the showers. Mad at me?"

"No. Flattered is what I am. Obviously I had feelings for you as well. I think I proved that tonight," I mentioned and while I was tempted to tell him that I was very aware of him checking me out in the locker room I bit my tongue.

"Even tonight when you had to guts to do what you did, I was still so afraid that I almost ran away," Jim confessed. "You're so manly and well endowed compared to me and besides, I've got a self-image problem with my body."

"I don't know why," I told him. "I wish I was as trim as you are. There's guys at the club half you age that don't have your body."

"That's not what I mean," Jim said. "You know what I'm talking about. You don't know how much I've dreamed about being built like you instead of hiding myself all the time. I've wished that I was the kind of guy that people would notice - like you are."

"That's juvenile stuff. I'm not that shallow," I assured Jim.

"This last time I was with a guy, or should I say tried to be with a guy about ten years ago, he laughed at me," Jim unloaded, taking a deep breath.

"What can I say? If we had to apologize for every jerk in the world we'd never get anything done," I explained. "Obviously, I didn't do any laughing."

"No, and it was one of the great experiences in my life," Jim said, he voice cracking as he spoke.

"So we're both good with everything," I said with a pat on this shoulder.

"No, not quite," Jim said, and then he added, "I know you were with Marcy before and all, so if you can't - I understand."

With that Jim went to his knees in the same place I had before, and after my boxers came down and I watched him bring my limp dick to his mouth I ran my hands through his light brown locks.

I'm not really well endowed, only a bit bigger than average, but I'm not a grower so maybe that was where Jim got his impression that I was something special. He found out the truth after lavishing a whole lot of pent-up love and affection on my cock and even though he was sucking a cock with my wife's pussy juices on it and it had been drained an hour earlier, he had me hard fast.

Jim might not have gotten a lot of practice lately, but you wouldn't have known it because he treated my cock like an artist. His tongue worked my foreskin like I wish my wife could, and the way he sucked on my balls, making snorting noises as he suckled on each of them like an animal, turned me on as much as the act itself.

When I came, and I tried to hold back as much as I could because he was getting very close to deep-throating me completely, he took it as eagerly as I had taken his seed, and I practically had to yank his mouth away after he continued to suck on my very dead dick long after I came.

"Don't think I ever had one that big before," Jim said after he rose and massaged his jaws, and although he was probably just saying it who doesn't want to hear it? "Out of practice."

"I'd hate to know what you're like in mid-season form," I kidded, quickly adding, "Of course, maybe I'll get to find out."

"Really?" Jim said as I lifted my boxers from the dewy ground, and then we felt the first drops of the expected storm along with the thunder from the distance.

"Why not? It's not like we have far to go if we want," I reminded him, and then he was scurrying home while I hustled inside myself.

***

"Okay, tell me all about it," my wife said when i got back to bed. "And don't leave out any of the details."

"Honey," I moaned as I climbed in next to her and felt her hand grab my sticky dick. "I'm tired."

"We don't have to get up tomorrow, it's Sunday," Marcy reminded me. "I love a good story."

***

Thank you for reading.