Between the Pages of Adultery Ch. 02

He glanced up in her direction and nodded. "Come on, honey," he said to Ashley. "Let's go over and sit on the couch. We have something to talk about."

Laura walked back into the kitchen to set the table and give them some privacy.

"Dad, please don't leave," Ashley said as she sat next to her dad. "Please, dad, mom's sorry. I know she'll never do it again."

"Honey, I wish it was that easy, I really do."

"Don't you love mom anymore?" asked Ashley.

Funny, he thought, I've been asking myself that same question all day. Of course he still loved her, but that love had been badly damaged. It was no longer the first thing he felt when his wife entered the room. Instead anger, anguish, and maybe a little hatred was pushing that love to the back of his emotions. Maybe there it would die altogether, he wasn't sure, but somehow he had to make his daughter understand why he couldn't live there anymore.

"Yes, honey, of course I still love your mom, but living as husband and wife involves more than just love, it also requires trust and respect by both people. Your mom said she told you what she did so I won't try to sugar coat this. Somewhere along the line I lost your mother's respect as her husband. Even though she didn't mean to do it, what she did hurt me, honey. It broke my heart. I know she's sorry, but that doesn't really help."

"Oh, dad," she cried.

"My pumpkin," he said pushing some hair from her eyes, "I wish I could wave a magic wand and make all this go away but I can't. I hope you understand, honey. I just can't go on living here. It would be a constant reminder of what your mom did. It would be torture for me, honey, I'm sorry."

Tears stained Ashley's pretty face as she nodded her head. She knew it was coming, as soon as her mom told her what she did, she knew there was no way her dad could accept it. She knew the loving home she had known all her life was history.

Harrison saw the grief in his little girls' face. He grabbed her and pulled her to his chest, his strong, fatherly arms surrounding her small frame. He could feel the moisture of her tears soaking into his shirt; he could feel her body convulsing with each sob.

He laid his cheek on the top of head. "I'm so sorry this happened, honey. I'm so very, very sorry."

Neither of them saw the tragic figure standing in the doorway. If she only had a crystal ball and could have seen all this before succumbing to Brad's charms, she thought. If she had foreseen the hurt she was putting her family through, there was no way she would have spread her legs for Brad or anyone else. If, if, if...

Harrison let his daughter cry until the sobs were getting further apart. "Come on, honey," he said lovingly. "Your mom will have dinner done by now. I'm going to eat with you guys before I pack, okay?"

Ashley nodded her head. She wiped the moisture from her face and tried to be brave as they both stood.

Laura was standing at the counter with her back to them. Her own pain was unbearable; she could only imagine the pain her husband and daughter were experiencing. "Have a seat," she said trying to keep her voice from shaking. There were three place settings at the table but Laura only prepared two dishes. She set them down in front of Harrison and Ashley.

"I... I'm not hungry," she said just before her voice cracked. "I'm... sorry," she said before leaving the room.

Harrison looked at his daughter's re-emerging tears. "It's hard on all of us, honey," he told her.

Harrison tried to take his daughter's mind off things by asking about school, boyfriends, activities, almost anything but his impending withdrawal. After dinner they rinsed the dishes together and put them into the dishwasher.

"I'll bet your mother has some ice cream in the freezer," he said breaking a short silence. "Want some dessert?"

"I'll get the bowls," she said opening a cabinet door.

The proud father tried to lighten the atmosphere as they continued to talk over dessert, and at one point, ever got Ashley to laugh a little. By the time they had finished their ice cream, they were both feeling a little better.

Harrison went upstairs to start packing. Laura was still in her clothes but sitting up against the headboard of the bed. He looked at the couple dozen dirty tissues sprawled around her; if it wasn't so sad it would almost be funny.

He stretched up to get the suitcase down from the top shelf of the closet, then opened it up on the floor next to his dresser.

"I hope you were just saying those things yesterday to hurt me and don't really believe it," Laura whimpered.

"What things," he responded while throwing some socks and underwear into the bag.

"Please believe me, Harrison; I do still love you... as much I ever have. I heard what you told Ashley, about losing respect for you. That's true but not because of anything you did. You have always been the kind of man who deserves and gets respect from everyone he knows."

"Ah huh; except my wife."

"That's not true. In all the years we've been married there has never been one time where you haven't deserved my love and respect."

"Why then?" he asked with the same anger he'd displayed the night before. "You just said you lost respect for me. Why?"

"It goes hand in hand with false pride. When a person's own ego is inflated with false pride and they think they're better than everyone else, they lose respect for others. Some people go through life like that, believing they're better than others and some have the shit kicked out of them and are shocked back into reality. Sometimes those people wake up in time to ask forgiveness of the people they've wronged, but sometimes it's too late. I wronged the people I love more than life itself. I wronged my wonderful husband, my precious daughter, my friends and my marriage. Please tell me it's not too late, Harrison."

Harrison sighed as he stooped to close up his suitcase. "I don't know, Laura. I think I'm still in shock. I... I feel empty inside, sick from the pain. I... I just never thought you would... I honestly don't know if I can ever forgive you. I'm not sure what I want right now, but I know I can't stay here. I wish I could for Ashley's sake but I can't."

He walked the suitcase to the bedroom door then went back to the closet and grabbed a handful of shirt's and slacks before taking what he had out to the car. One more trip for his suits, sport coats, and ties and he was ready.

When everything was in the car he went back one more time to say goodbye to his daughter. "As soon as I'm settled in someplace, honey, I'll let you know where I am. We'll still see each other, pumpkin, I promise. I can come and pick you up for weekends and maybe sometimes during the week as well."

For the first time since his wife's confession, tears overflowed from his eyes and streamed down his face as he hugged his little princess goodbye.

"I love you, daddy," she told him.

"I love you too," he replied. "I'm still your dad and you're still my daughter, that'll never change, honey, never. Remember that," he told her through a forced smile.

As he turned to exit his daughter's room he saw Laura standing in their bedroom doorway at the other end of the hall. There was no longer any inflated ego or self- righteous pride showing, just guilt, remorse, and extreme sadness.

Neither had anymore words for the other at that moment, he turned to walk down stairs and out to his car.

"Come on," Laura said holding her arms out to her daughter. "Let's go down and wave to him."

They both stood on the front porch and waved goodbye as his tail lights disappeared down the quiet suburban street.

"Don't give up hope," Laura said.

Harrison's first thought was to check into the Holliday Inn a couple blocks from where he worked, but as he pulled into the parking lot he got a strange feeling... it was too far. It was too far from his home. He had to be closer, just in case Ashley needed him. He turned around and drove to the Extended Stay motel about a mile from his home. Not only did he feel better being closer to his house but his room had a small kitchen and he could get a monthly rate.

As Harrison brought everything in from his car he put it all away. His shirts, slacks, and suits were hung up in the closet and everything else was either put into draws or in the bathroom. He had no idea what he was going to do in the long run, but for the short term anyway, that motel room would be his new home. As he settled in with that thought in mind, he called his daughter's cell to tell her where he was and assured her once more that they would still see each other on a regular basis.

As he took his shoes off and sat up in bed to watch a little TV a strange loneliness seemed to invade the room. Like an evil demon, it slithered in from under the door and spread out to permeate the air he breathed with solitude and isolation.

He had been away from home before, and sure, he had longed to be with his family on those occasions but he was still comfortable being by himself. This was different. For the first time in his life he wasn't just by himself, he felt alone... truly, undeniably, alone.

It was still early but it had been a long day and he'd gotten no sleep the night before. He clicked the remote to shut off the TV and lay down, still in his clothes. He closed his eyes as his mind asked questions of the future, questions to which he had no answers.

At the house Harrison's wife was tucking their daughter into bed. She hadn't done that in years. Ashley was too old for that, but that night Laura thought her daughter needed to be comforted and Ashley didn't mind.

"Mom, do you really think dad will be back?"

Her mom pulled the sheet up and tucked it under Ashley's chin like she did years ago. She smiled. "I'm going to do everything I can to see that he does, honey."

A little later that night, when Laura was getting ready for bed herself, she noticed the book missing from the corner of the dresser. For the first time in days a small smile reached across her face as she allowed a tiny glimmer of hope into her heart.

Harrison was still dressed when he opened his eyes to the morning light filtering in through the window. He was surprised that he had slept so soundly. He contributed his, "dead-to-the-world" slumber to complete and total exhaustion from all the stress.

As he showered, he found the hot water invigorating. Slowly, the confident man inside him started to emerge again. The fog he had been living in for the last couple of days was being washed away and things began to come into focus.

At work Harrison was the go-to guy. He worked for Marketing Specialists, Inc., a firm who specialized in collecting marketing data for other businesses. If XYZ Corporation had an idea for a new product, they would hire Harrison's company to see if there was a market for it. If the results of their analysis were favorable, the corporation's marketing department would use the data for developing ad campaigns once the product was in production.

Harrison was project manager for the company's largest accounts. His staff consisted of Dana, his personal assistant, two secretaries who answered to Dana, and approximately twenty-five analysts, managers, and go-fors. He answered to only three people above him, all of whom seldom questioned the way he did his job.

"Good morning, Harrison." Dana was an average looking woman in her mid-forties. She'd been his PA and friend for the last eight years.

"Good morning, Dana." He always gave her a smile as he passed on the way to his office. "Dana, will you do me a favor, please. Print out my entire schedule for the week and bring it in with my coffee. I may want to reschedule some things."

"Of course," she replied.

A few minutes later, Dana walked into his office carrying his coffee in one hand and his print outs in the other. "Is something wrong?" she asked setting his cup down on a coaster. "I don't think you said two words to me all day, yesterday."

He thought for a moment. The last thing he wanted was to make everyone privy to his personal problems. At work he was Mr. in-control. How would it look to his co-workers... to his subordinates, if it got out that he couldn't control his own wife? But this was Dana asking, they'd known each other for many years and he knew he could trust her.

"Dana, this goes no further than this office, hear me?"

"Yes, of course, Harrison. What's wrong?"

"Laura and I are having some problems. I moved out last night."

"Oh, Harrison, no."

"I'm afraid so," he responded nodding his head slightly. "Sometime this week I'll be seeing a divorce attorney. That's why I wanted the itinerary; I have to see where I can juggle some time."

"Harrison, I'm so sorry. What about Ashley, does she know?"

"Oh yeah, she's well aware of the whole situation."

"How's she taking it?"

"Ah, well not good but she's a trooper. She'll be alright. I've assured her over and over again that we'll still see each other on a regular basis."

Harrison looked up and saw the concern in his PA's face. Another victim, he thought. How many more people will wind up being affected by his wife's infidelity? He didn't know, but the number was growing.

"Is there anything I can do?" she asked.

"I appreciate the offer, but no, this is something I have to work out myself," he replied.

"Well if there is anything, please let me know."

"Thanks, Dana, I will," he told her looking down at the itinerary she laid on his desk. She took that as her cue to leave.

Harrison saw he had a very busy couple of days ahead of him but if he rescheduled one meeting he'd have a good three hours available at the end of the week. He called out to Dana to do the rescheduling.

It didn't take long for his analytical mind to pick an attorney. He simply looked in the yellow pages for the lawyer with the biggest ad. Dana set the appointment for him at two o'clock that Friday. It turned out to be a real eye-opener.

Stan Gilman was a tall, silver haired gentleman in his early sixties. Harrison was ushered into his office by a nice looking blond secretary and offered a cup of coffee. Once the pleasantries were over, Stan got right down to business.

"Okay, Mr. Corbett, how can I help you?"

"Well, I... I'm probably going to divorce my wife and I wanted to find out everything that's going to be involved."

"I see," responded Stan. "On what grounds do you want to sue?"

"Ah, does there have to be grounds? Can't I just get a no-fault divorce?"

"Illinois is not a no-fault state. You can sue for irreconcilable differences; that's almost like a no-fault divorce. It simply states neither party has to be at fault, but there are conditions involved."

"What kind of conditions?" Harrison asked.

"Would you wife be agreeable to a divorce?"

"I doubt it," answered Harrison shaking his head.

"Then you would have to maintain separate living quarters for two years before you can file."

"Two years!" Harrison bellowed almost falling out of his chair. "That's ridiculous!"

"Maybe so but that's the law," informed Stan. "Now, if you sue for fault you can file immediately. Does she suffer from drug or alcohol abuse? Has she committed adultery? Has she abandoned you for a year or more? Is she guilty of physical or mental cruelty?" Stan sat up and leaned his elbows on the large Oak desk in front of him. "Why are you considering a divorce, Mr. Corbett?"

"She cheated on me," he admitted.

"Okay, are you sure; do you have proof?"

"Yeah, she told me she screwed another guy. She came right out and confessed."

"Really, well I assume she told you because she's planning on leaving you for her lover? Are you sure she doesn't want a divorce?"

"No, she promised not to see him again, in fact she quit her job because he was a client. She confessed to ease her guilty conscience."

"I see," Stan countered. He suspected there was more behind Laura's confession than just easing her conscience but that really wasn't his concern. His job was that of an officer of the court, not a marriage counselor.

"Unfortunately, Mr. Corbett, your wife's confession is not real proof. All she has to do is recant and it becomes her word against yours. The suit becomes baseless."

"She admitted it to our daughter, too. That's two against one, right?"

"How old is your daughter?"

"Fifteen."

"And you would really want me to call your daughter to testify against her mother?"

Harrison lowered his head in shame. He was getting frustrated and hadn't thought before he spoke. "No, no of course not," he said sheepishly.

The distinguished looking gentleman broke into a small smile. "Mr. Corbett, if both parties are in agreement, divorce is a relatively easy process, but if not, the state goes out of their way to make it a long, frustrating, and costly procedure. If you can get her to agree to a divorce, that two year separation period can be cut down to six months. You could even live in the same house as long as you didn't live as husband and wife; in other words, no sex. But without her cooperation, I'm afraid you're stuck between a rock and hard place, at least for the next two years."

"Thank you, Mr. Gilman," Harrison said while standing and extending his hand. "I guess I have to think this through some more."

"That's a good idea, Mr. Corbett," he replied as he also stood to take his prospective client's hand. "Mr. Corbett, you might also give some thought to marriage counseling. From what you've told me, it sounds as if your wife is serious about making amends, and with a fifteen year old child implicated... well, it might be worth a try."

Harrison knew he was only trying to be helpful but he went there for information on ending his marriage, not saving it.

"I'll give it some thought as well," he said just to be polite. "Uh, here's my card," he mentioned pulling a business card from his wallet. "Just send the bill to me at that address."

"There's no charge, Mr. Corbett. Most people haven't a clue when it comes to divorcing someone so I offer one free consultation, this is yours."

That was the best news he'd heard since walking into the lawyer's office. He thanked him again and left wondering how he could get Laura to agree to a divorce.

The next day was Saturday. He'd made arrangements to pick Ashley up in the morning. She was going to spend the weekend. On the drive over he wondered if this was to be his new life, living alone, seeing his daughter on weekends. It certainly wasn't the life he had envisioned.

As he pulled into the drive he didn't feel like seeing Laura so he left the motor running and honked the horn. It was a minute or two before Laura came out on the porch.

"Ashley will be a few minutes, Harrison. Come on in and have a cup of coffee while you're waiting."

"No, that's okay," he told her. "I'll just wait out here."

He could see Laura's face drop from where he was. A couple minutes later it was Ashley who stepped out next.

"Dad, can you come in and give me a hand with something?"

Before he could question her as to what she needed, she was back inside already. He sighed and wondered if it was just some ploy cooked up between wife and daughter. He was really hoping Laura wouldn't try to use Ashley to manipulate him. He didn't really think she would do that, but then he didn't think she'd ever screw another man either.

Begrudgingly he got out of the car and headed inside the house.

"SURPRISE!" yelled both females.

And a surprise it was. With everything going on he had completely forgotten it was his birthday. There was a large banner stretched across the hallway saying, 'Happy Birthday, Harrison,' and on the coffee table was a birthday cake with candles. Standing next to it were two smiling ladies, each holding a brightly wrapped gift in their hands.