Between Us

If I were to ask you to define the word, "soul-mate", could you do it? I mean, what does that mean to you. I can tell you what it means to me. A soul-mate is someone that you could devote your entire life to, someone that you need like the air you breath, someone that is your equal in every way. They are your best friend. Or at least, that has always been my definition of the word.

For years, I prayed for someone, who could properly fill that role in my life. I would have given anything for her to be real. Then, the day that I realized that I had finally found her, it was not my wife, who I received as the answer to my prayers but, our daughter.

Do you remember that nursery rhyme that is instilled into our brains from day one? You know, the one about what little girls are made of.

Sugar and spice and everything nice,
that's what little girls are made of.

I've come to believe that perhaps it's true.

Erin has skin the color of the richest cinnamon. Her eyes are such a deep brown that on several occasions I have become lost in them. And her gentle disposition is as sweet as any sugar I have ever tasted.

Now, I know what you might be thinking. "Oh, you just fell in love with a younger version of your wife." Am I right? You're justified in thinking that but, you couldn't possibly be more wrong.

These two women are polar opposites of each other. Erin is everything her mother never was: petite, caring, unselfish, thirsty for knowledge and my world. Jenny, Erin's mother, is petite; yes, but, she is self-absorbed, arrogant, can be cruel and refuses to "waste her time" reading or discovering anything new. Sure, Jenny is a stunning ebony-skinned beauty but, she is little else. It took many years to see that.

Over the years, I have watched Erin grow from a little girl displaying wisdom beyond her years into a strikingly beautiful young woman. All of this, I have done in utter awe.

Our time together is something that I treasure. It is exactly what I prayed for all those nights ago. It has been from the beginning.

Considering that it has just been the two of us, I think that we have done exceptionally well. Now, I do not mean to sound as if her mother is dead because she is not. Although, she might as well be for all the good she has done Erin. She left us shortly after Erin's third birthday. To this day, I'm not sure why. I can guess though.

Jenny never wanted to be a mother. Whenever she would look at Erin, there was a deep resentment in her eyes. Upon discovering that she was pregnant, her first instinct was to have an abortion. It was my objections that ceased that line of thought. Instead, we were married and Erin was born shortly thereafter. She never forgave me for what she considered ruining her life.

I suppose considering her feelings about our marriage and Erin, it was only a matter of time before she left and a miracle that she stayed as long as she did. But, enough about her. I want to tell you about my Erin.

Being a single dad means that everyone feels that they have the right to tell you how to raise your child. I know that I encountered so many people, who took it upon themselves to critique my work.

"You shouldn't treat her that way," they would say. That always meant that they didn't like the way that I was speaking to Erin. I refused to talk down to her because I believed that it was an insult her intelligence.

"You shouldn't treat her that way," as Erin grew older became, "She shouldn't think about such things." Now, by "such things," they never meant sex or anything like that. They always meant life.

Erin tended to think about life tens years from now. If I had been her age and thinking about what I wanted to do ten years from now, I might not have been so overwhelmed when high school was suddenly over and I was expected to "make something of myself."

Within a few years, I'd say around the time that Erin turned eighteen, they started to say, "You should talk to her about her behavior. She shouldn't act that way."

I would always respond, "But, I thought that you said I shouldn't treat her that way. I mean, didn't you say we shouldn't sit around talking?"

They would always get flustered and leave us alone which is exactly how I like it. Besides, why would I want to tell Erin to be anything but, who she is. If I did, she wouldn't be my Erin; would she?

Erin is twenty now. I'm twenty years her senior and she reminds me of it every time enters the room and my old heart beats like it could burst. I want her so much. I think that I have always known that I was in love with her but, there had never been a physical desire to show her until she recently moved back into our home.

I'm sure that I don't have to tell you how happy the prospect of her living with me again made me. After her break up with a man, who I thought completely unfit to be considered a member of the human species, she decided that instead of living alone in an apartment, she would just return to her childhood home. It was perfect.

The Mediterranean-style home hidden deep within the hills of California, in which I have lived for nearly twenty years, is much too large for me to live in it alone. Even with her here, it seemed massive.

The first day that she was there after moving back in, changed so much for me. I realized that it might be extremely difficult not to have her as more than a daughter and friend.

I was inside the downstairs bedroom which had only recently been converted into a large gym. In all honesty, the room had been changed because I saw how much Erin seemed to appreciate a man in good physical condition.

Jumping off of the treadmill, I felt my lungs burning for air. I looked down to see my black shorts collecting the brunt of the sweat running down my naked torso. Running my fingers through my short brown hair, I laughed at myself.

"What the hell am I doing?" I groaned. "I'm going to kill myself trying to act as though I'm still twenty."

Erin walked into the room, sending my already pounding heart into a near fit. She was wearing a sports bra that left little to my heightened imagination. Her legs, though short, were firm and lean, looking even more appealing than usual in the pair of nylon pants that might have been painted onto her. Her long hair had been pulled back into a sleek ponytail. She must have wanted to cut it a million times but, she kept it long for me. I love her long hair and she knows it. She has made an art of knowing exactly when to flip it over her shoulder to drive me absolutely wild.

Searching the room with her eyes, Erin smiled. "You did a good job on the room, daddy."

God, I love her smile, I thought.

"Do you think I ought to give up my day job?" I teased, hoping to lengthen the duration of her smile.

Erin took the towel which was hanging over her shoulder and playfully used it as a weapon against me. Swatting me on the leg, she laughed. "Okay, smartass. Just see if I try to say anything nice to you from now on."

I watched her pretend to pout. Her full lips had always been perfect for it. Grabbing her roughly, my arms surrounded her petite body in a powerful embrace. I couldn't remember how many times that I had dreamt of taking her from behind like this. We fit together so well like this.

"I'm sorry, love," I said, kissing her cheek. "I was only playing. Do you forgive me?"

Erin squirmed and struggled while laughing wonderfully. "Oh, get off me! You're covered in sweat!" she squealed.

"You don't like me sweaty?" I joked. To emphasize my point, I began to wipe my sweat-brimmed cheek against her soft skin.

"Get off!" Erin screamed. She wriggled inside my arms, knowing exactly where to tickle my side, making me consider an immediate retreat. "Let me go, old man!"

I just couldn't let her go. She felt wonderful in my arms, pressed tightly against me. "Or what?" I challenged.

That was stupid, I know. Challenging my daughter only inspires her to fight harder which she did by tickling me harder. I held on for as long as I could until finally I had no choice but, to let her go. Her body moving against me felt too nice to ignore and the fear of her detecting my excitement made for no other choice.

The beautiful twenty-year old smiled victoriously. Tilting her head a bit, she stared at me in a way that a woman looks at a man. There was nothing in this look that suggested she was merely my daughter.

I began to squirm nervously under the intensity of her gaze. She always had a way of searching my eyes until she discovered whatever it was that she was looking for. It had been that way even when she was only a child.

"What?" I asked, hoping to end her scrutiny.

"What's her name?"

"Whose name, baby?"

Erin's brown eyes narrowed on me playfully. "I want to know who has made you suddenly loose around fifteen pounds, dress better, smile more and is responsible for all those other little changes that I've noticed in you since I got here this morning."

"Fifteen pounds?!" I gasped looking down at my stomach. "That can't be right. Do you think so?"

"Yes, daddy. You look good."

I laughed, feeling very self-conscious. I wondered if she would believe that I had done all this for her. Looking at her before immediately being forced to look away, I was happy that she had thought my toning up had not been in vain.

I had never been overweight but, I knew that I looked nothing like the young men that she seemed to go for. It was because of this that I had worked for several hours each day to flatten my once flabby stomach and strengthen the muscles in my arms, knowing full well that Erin loved these particular places in her lovers.

Her lovers, I thought. How I would love to be considered in that particular group.

Weakly, I asked, "What makes you think that this is over a woman?"

"It isn't?"

The smile that she gave me told me that she knew me much too well. I didn't know how it was possible for her to make a grown man blush but, I did, much to my dismay.

"I knew it!" she said, clapping her hands together triumphantly. "What's her name? Do I know her? What's she look like? I'll bet she's pretty. Oh, tell me. I can't believe you've been holding out on me. We tell each other everything. Why haven't you told me this?"

"Wait a minute, now, Erin." I raised my hands, hoping to end her rapid-fire questions. "I didn't say-"

"You didn't have to say anything, love. I'm your best friend; remember? I know you."

I could not repress the smile that dawned my face, when she addressed herself as my best friend. She was my best friend. "You don't have to worry about her," I said. "She would never see me as anything but, a friend."

Erin moved beside me, gently smoothing my cheek. "Why not? You're wonderful."

"Do you think so?" I asked, daring to kiss her wrist.

"Yes."

"Well, if you think so, that's all that matters." Truly, it was all that mattered to me.

"Daddy," she started but, I never let her get past that.

I kissed her forehead then, told her goodnight. Her voice stopped me as I was about to leave the room.

"What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Nothing."

"So you're free?"

"I'm free."

A smile washed over Erin like I'd never seen before. It was slightly mischievous but, there was something else, something that I couldn't quite make out.

"So you're mine tomorrow, if I want you?"

My inner voice was praying to God that she would not notice the instant erection caused by those words. Schooling my voice to utter calm, I answered. "Sure; why not?"

"Great," she replied before hopping onto the treadmill for a quick run.

I hurried down the hall then climbed the stairs two and three at a time. There was definitely a notable bounce in my step. Upon arriving at the top of the stairs, I glanced to the left, seeing the room at the far end of the hall: Erin's room. She had spent the entire day moving her old childhood furniture into one of the many spare bedrooms and redecorating it.

Redecorating it how, I wondered. I would have loved to peer inside and see what her secret haven looked like now but, I resisted that urge, going instead to the room at the far end of the hall to my right : my room.

Closing the door behind me, I remembered the feel of Erin pressed against me. The memory caused a stirring within my shorts. I walked to my bed after stopping at the dresser and removing a magazine from its top left drawer. Staring at the naked woman on the cover, I sat down.

My father had given me this magazine the day before. He insisted that I get over Jenny- which I insisted that I had- and find myself a new woman or at least someone to screw. I don't have to say that I was a bit shocked that this was coming from a man pushing seventy but, that's how dad is. I took the magazine to humor him. Now, as I sat flipping through its pages, I knew that I took it as much for myself as for him.

I slipped out of my clothes, sitting naked on the side of my bed. There was a picture of a sexy twenty-something that was mixed like my Erin: half black, half white. She looked to be a bit taller than Erin but, that didn't matter. The fantasy had already implanted itself into my mind.

I slide my hand down the shaft of my fully erected sex, seeing not this woman in the magazine lying on her back, exposing her most intimate places to the camera but, I saw Erin in all her glory, revealing to me what I was aching for. I imagined her hand moving up and down on me, faster and faster still, until she uttered the words that I prayed she might say to me.

Cum for me.

The thought of her ever uttering such words to me, sent me over the edge causing me to cum instantly. In fact, the fantasy of Erin lying in such a pose worked well enough for me to cum again shortly thereafter only I refused to allow myself to orgasm so quickly. I imagined that she made me work for it. I was practically begging to cum, nearly some half hour later.

Covered in sweat, I grabbed a towel and enjoyed my hot shower. When I emerged from the bathroom, Erin sat on my bed wearing a pair of white cotton underwear and a gray tank top. I instantly noticed that her full breasts were not bound by a bra. My eyes then moved over her sleek crossed legs. I would have loved to kneel before her, moving those panties to the side and make love to her with my mouth. My hunger for her only dissipated when I finally saw that she was casually holding the porno magazine in her hands.

"Is this yours?" she asked, looking evenly over the cover.

I blanched fearing that she might scold me or say that I was sinful for even possessing such a thing. "Your grandfather gave that to me," I stuttered. "He thinks I need to. . .uh. . . I'm not into that sort of thing, usually. Are you mad?"

Erin looked at me with a curious frown. "Why should I be mad, love?"

Slowly, I moved to lean against the frame of my bathroom door, feeling that familiar stirring just beneath the surface of my navy pants. I opened my mouth to speak but, found my voice had abandoned me.

Erin opened the magazine, lightly turning through its pages. She tilted her head a bit to the left, sending her long hair falling over her shoulder. Her study intensified as she stopped her scan, focusing her study on one particular woman.

"She's pretty," I heard her say as she motioned with her chin for me to look at the woman holding her attention.

I pushed off the door, going to sit beside my daughter on the bed. My brown eyes grew wide as I realized that she was looking at the woman, who had held my attention only a few moments before; the woman that I related so successfully to her.

"Yeah," I said rubbing the back of my neck.

"Was I not supposed to know that you had this?"

Actually, I wasn't sure how I had expected her to react to my owning a magazine like this. The casual manner in which she allowed her eyes to drift over the pages was driving me wild. She was inviting me to look at these images with her.

From the corner of her eye, she noticed the way I kept rubbing the back of my neck.

"What's wrong with your neck?" Erin asked, turning the page.

"Nothing," I lied.

Her brown eyes looked away from the magazine, finding mine. Erin focused on me, searching for the answer to her question which she knew would be hidden within my eyes. She frowned thoughtfully. "You hurt yourself exercising."

"It's just a little knot," I said, wondering how she always did that. "It's nothing, really."

Erin stood up, handing me the magazine.

"Are you leaving?" I asked nervously.

"Do you want me to?"

"No." I took her hand in mine, not wanting to let her go.

Smiling in a way that warmed my heart, Erin touched my cheek. "Lie down."

My heart began to beat wildly as a flurry of lurid images flooded my mind. "Why?"

Erin gently guided me onto my stomach, making sure that I propped a pillow comfortably under my chin. She crawled onto the bed, straddling my hips. As her hands began to move over my back in a tender massage, she asked, "How's that?"

I closed my eyes, enjoying her hands on me more than I thought possible. "Hold on," I said, pretending to be uncomfortable.

Moving beneath her, I could feel my lower back rubbing against her through those thin cotton panties. The tightening of her thighs drew my attention as her body instinctively reacted to my seemingly innocent movements.

"Better?" she asked, when I had stopped my squirming.

I knew that she had leaned forward a bit. Her voice had seemed closer, the slope of her sex had changed to a different angle, tormenting me wonderfully and her breasts were now dangling just above my back. Through the fabric of her shirt I could feel that her nipples had hardened as a result of my actions.

"Sorry." I wasn't in the least. I would have done the same if I had it to do, again. "I just needed to get into a better position." Now, that part had been true. I did want to get into a better position and this one was bliss.

"So," I sighed as the massage continued. "What was it that you needed?"

Erin's hands were moving over me like someone, who had more than just a casual experience at relieving certain tensions. She had the skill of a woman, who had seduced many a man into her bed.

"I came in here to talk to you about tomorrow," she said.

"Yeah, I was wondering about that too." That was an understatement. I was dying to know what she had in store for me.

"I was hoping that we could go for a drive along the coast."

"In the convertible," I added, seeing where this was going.

"You know me too well," she chuckled softly.

I smiled. Erin had always loved going for long drives. There was something about being on the open road that brought comfort to her. "I don't know, Erin." I was dying to see how she would try to convince me.

"Please, Daddy," she said, doing the remarkable and gentling her massage even more. A deep sigh left my lips as I tried to feign reluctance. The truth was that I looked forward to our drives as much as she did. I could not remember the last time that we had been out like that. She had been so busy lately with her new job and her ex. "Alright."

I listened to her laugh happily.

"Thank you, Daddy. I knew you'd say, 'yes.'"

Looking over my shoulder, I couldn't get over how beautiful she was. "You're spoiled, Erin."

"I know it." Smirking, she asked, "Would you like to know a secret?"

"Sure, love. Tell me."

The smile that she had on her face changed to a more serious expression. She leaned forward, stopping with her lips near my ear. "I think, you like spoiling me."

I took in a deep breath, loving the feel of her breath tickling her ear and her chest pressed closely to my back. I would have given anything for her to remain so close but, as she pulled away, I could feel myself missing the warmth of her body. She was pushing up to put an end to the massage . I didn't want this to be over so quickly.