Big Bang Theory Season 02 Ep. 01-03

There's a knock on the door and without waiting for a reply, Sheldon comes barging in. His eyes nearly pop out of his head and he sucks in his breath, seeing both of them naked and in the middle of copulation, "When the two of you reach a natural stopping point, I'd like to have a word."

"Get the hell out Sheldon, if you want to talk, we'll be out after, well, we'll be out when we come out. Now get out and don't you ever come into my room again without permission."

Sheldon nods, "I'm sorry, but I believe this picture of the two of you will be burned in my brain forever." He leaves the room, closing the door behind him.

An hour later, after Leslie and Leonard finished what they started, ended and started again, they dressed and head out to the living room where Sheldon is sitting rather impatiently. "Well it is about time, what were the two of you doing in there so long? Wait... I don't want to know. Let me start out with, Leonard, you are my friend and friends support friends, apparently. So I am withdrawing my objection to your desire to have a relationship with Leslie. I will graciously overlook the fact that she is an arrogant, subpar scientist, who believes loop quantum gravity better unites quantum mechanics with general relativity that does string theory. Now you kids can continue having fun."

Leslie goes off on Sheldon and after a long, drawn out argument; she realized Leonard is siding with Sheldon with his string theory, over her loop quantum gravity. "Leonard, I cannot raise children having their parents torn apart by two different and opposing theories, good bye, I'm glad I found this out before our children were born." She grabs her purse and leaves the apartment.

Sheldon stands there, "Mmmm, I guess I should have brought this up earlier and avoided sitting on the stairs for two long evenings. At least you got some coitus out of it, you owe me! Look on the bright side."

What's the bright side?"

"Only nine more months to Comic-Con." As he turned and left for his bedroom he added, "You're welcome!"

Leonard stood in the middle of the living room, his mouth open in awe and he threw his arms up, "Everything was going fine, what the hell happened?" He stopped and thought about it, "I got it, I live with a nutcase and if I don't break free, I'll end up living with 20 hairless cats."

A few days later Penny; hasn't heard about Leonard's break-up with Leslie yet. She's outside her apartment trying to open her door using her car ignition key. She's making a lot of noise out there and is disruptive to Sheldon who is in "his spot" playing an online game. His online name is Sheldor the Conqueror. He pauses the game and says, "Sheldor is AFK." He gets up and opening his door he sees Penny in distress.

"Penny, are you experiencing some sort of difficulty?"

She's still struggling with the door and the bags she's holding are slipping away, "Yes, I can't get my stupid door open."

He steps closer, "You appear to have put your car key in the door lock. Are you aware of that?"

She turns and gives him an evil stare, "Yeah!"

"All right then." He turns to return to his apartment and just as he's about to close the door her bags fall from her arm, scattering all over the floor and she bellows out, Damn it, damn it, damn it!" He turns and walks back out into the hallway, "Would it be possible for you to do this a little more quietly?"

She still struggling with the door, the last bag is slipping away, "I can't get the damn key out."

"That's not surprising. That Baldwin lock on your door uses traditional edge-mounted cylinders, whereas the key for your Volkswagen uses a center-cylinder system."

She turns and gives him an even dirtier stare and through gritted teeth she replies, "Thank you, Sheldon!"

As always, he misses the sarcasm and replies back, "You're welcome." And as she turns back to the door, he begins again, "Point of inquiry: Why did you put your car key in the door lock?"

She screaming now, "I'll tell you why! Today I had an audition. It took me two hours to get there. I waited an hour for my turn. And before I could start, they told me I look too Midwest for the part. Too Midwest, what the hell does that even mean? God, I have been in L.A. for almost two years now." While telling him this, she picking up the food spilled all over the floor and begins putting them back in the bag and she continues, "I haven't gotten a single acting job. I've accomplished nothing. Haven't gotten a raise at work, I haven't even had sex in six months, except that one time with Mike and Howard, that's a secret, you can't tell anyone about that. And when I was walking up those stairs, a fly flew in my mouth and I ate it."

Putting his foot in his mouth again he replied, "Well, actually, insects are a dietary staple in many cultures. They're almost pure protein."

She stands up with the bag and the entire bottom falls out and her food is once again all over the floor and she screams out, "Oh, son of a bitch!"

"Returning to your key conundrum, you should call a locksmith. Have him open the door for you."

"I did, he said he'll get here then he gets here."

"You're frustrated because he phrased his reply in a meaningless tautology?"

She screams out again, "No, I am frustrated because I am a failure at everything and my breath smells like fly!" She slowly slides down the wall and flops down on the floor among all of her food and starts crying.

In his usual response he says, "There, there." He looks around feeling awkward, "Would you prefer to wait in our apartment?"

She sarcastically replies, "No Sheldon, I'd rather sit on this freezing floor, sobbing like a 3-year-old."

"All right, then!" He turns to slip back into his place.

She jumps up and starts running towards his door, "For God's sake." She races past him and walks around the room

Sheldon is standing out in the hall, "Just when I think I've gotten the hang of sarcasm. Make yourself comfortable." She goes to sit in his spot and he chimes out, "Not there!"

She gets up and flops down on the sofa and plants her feet on the coffee table. She looks up at him as he stares down at her feet on the table, blocking his way to his spot. She slowly raises her feet to allow him to pass and flops them back down on the coffee table.

He picks up his laptop, slips his headset back on and looks back at Penny, hit the pause button and speaks into the headphone, "Sheldor is back online."

In a mocking voice she blurts out, "Sheldor?" and he replies, "The Conqueror."

She's slipped so low on the sofa that her head is nearly on the seat cushion, "What the hell are you doing."

He speaks into the headset, "AFK!" Turning towards Penny he tells her, "I'm playing Age of Conan, an online multiplayer game set in the universe of Robert E. Howard's Conan the Barbarian."

She looks bored, "Oh!"

"Sheldon puts his headset back on, "Sheldon back online!"

She looks to him, "What's AFK?" Sheldon speaks into the headset, "AFK!" and turns back to her, "Away from keyboard."

She nods, "Oh I see!"

"What does that stand for?"

She smiles and bites her lip and relies back again, "Oh I see!" This time she says it really slow.

He stares at her, "Yes, but what does it stand for?"

Leonard is coming home and sees all of Penny's food spilled all over the floor. In the apartment, Sheldon is giving Penny lessons on playing the online game. His laptop is on her lap and she's really getting hooked on the game. She does what he says and she's now a level three warrior.

Leonard walks in and asks what's going on. She turns to him and giggles out, "Hey Leonard, guess what, I'm a level three warrior."

He motions for Sheldon to come onto the kitchen. Sheldon is smiling and gets up to join him there.

Penny blurts out, "Wait, where are you going?"

He stands up, "Go ahead, you're okay! If you run into crocodiles, just kick them with your boots." He comes over to Leonard.

Leonard has a huge smile on his face, "Wanna catch me up?"

"Well, uh, let's see, she attempted to open her apartment with her car key, because her face is overly Midwestern. Uh, she hasn't had sex in six months, except with someone I cannot divulge. Oh yeah, she ate a fly."

All of a sudden Penny bursts out, "Oh, my god, a treasure chest, I'm rich!"

Sheldon scoffs, "Level three and she thinks she's rich. What a newb."

The next day the four guys get together and are trying a liquid of cornstarch and water on a speaker that turns to a solid when the speaker is turned up.

Penny comes rushing into the apartment and she isn't impressed, "Listen, I need to talk to Sheldon. Okay, I brought the game and I've been exploring the island of Tortage. I can't figure how to pass the guard."

"Do you have the enchanted sword?"

"No, but I have a bronze dagger."

"You can't slay the guard with a dagger. My lord, it's like the key in your apartment door all over again."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, how do I get the sword?"

"Have you been to the Temple of Mitra?"

"Is that the place on the hill with the priest?"

"No, it's...Oh, for God's sakes, give me" he takes her computer and quickly gets it for her.

"Thank you, I really appreciate this."

"You have to learn to do these things..."

"Don't patronize me, just get the sword."

"There you go, one enchanted sword."

"All right, give me, give me. I wanna kill the guard captain." She grabs her computer and is out the door, back to her apartment.

Later that evening Sheldon is tucked away in his bed, he's gently stroking his huge cock, thinking about how great Naomi's lips felt around his cock the night of Leonard's birthday party. He was so engrossed in what he was thinking; he didn't hear the knocking on his bedroom door.

Penny opened his door and slipped in, she whispers, "Sheldon!" She closes the door behind her and comes over to the bed. She's wearing a tiny yellow tank-top and very, very short pair of red running shorts. Her long blonde hair is up in a high ponytail. In a high pitched voice she calls out to him again and he suddenly realizes Penny is in his room. He accidentally jumps up and his covers fall away, showing his huge, stiff cock with a death grip from his fist. He quickly recovers and pulls the covers back over his body. It was too late; Penny got an eyeful, but came in there for a different reason. He looks up and is stunned to see her there and yells out, "Danger, danger!"

She's flustered by seeing his huge cock and sits on the edge of the bed, "No danger, it's me, Penny! Listen, I got to level 25 and reached Purple Lotus Swamp, right?"

"You're in my bedroom."

"Yeah, Leonard gave me an emergency key."

"People can't be in my bedroom!"

"Can we go talk in the living room?"

"I'm not wearing pajama bottoms, but I think you saw that."

She giggles, "Yeah, I sort of did, boy Naomi was right, but that isn't why I'm here. Just tell me, is it too soon to join a quest to the Black Castle?"

He sits up in bed, "You were invited on a quest to the Black Castle?"

"Yeah, yeah, by some guys in Budapest. I'm just now sure it's the right move for my character."

He's taken aback, "Of course it's not. You're only a level 25. These Hungarians are just using you for dragon fodder."

"Really? Boy, you'd think you could trust a horde of Hungarian Barbarians. As for a horde, I sort of liked what I saw under that comforter Sheldon." Before he can react, she throws back the comforter and grips his cock in her meaty, Nebraska, man hand. She starts stroking and Sheldon is too far gone to stop her.

After playing with it, thinking of Naomi, he welcomed Penny's hand. He falls back against the headboard and watches as she's mesmerized by the length and thickness of his cock

Penny is fascinated that such a pompous ass could be connected to such a gorgeous cock. Her hand slid upward and her thumb ran around and around the fat swollen head. She smeared his pre-cum all around the head and as her thumb moved away, it left a string attached to her thumb and his cock. As if in a trance, her head slowly lowered and her hot breath caused him to shiver. Her pretty pink lips close around the head and her cheeks hallowed out as she kept it there and just sucked harder. She could taste his salty juices on her tongue. Her tongue got into the action, once she swallowed what she collected. Her tongue whipped around and around the head. Letting it go, she pushed his stiff cock against his heaving belly. Lowering her head, she flicked out and rolled his nuts around with her active tongue. She sucked one nut into her mouth and she smiled as she heard him groan and his hands came down and tugged at her tight ponytail. She became more active, letting the nut go; she sucked on the other one briefly. She latched her lips to the root of his cock and began sucking and her tongue began flicking out, covering every square inch of his cock. She reached the top; his entire cock was covered in her spit.

Sheldon was gasping for breath, reaching down; he pulled frantically at the top of her tank-top. He freed one of her large, firm tits. He started squeezing and rolling the large mound in his hand. When he sought out her fat, swollen nipple, he rolled it around between his fingers. He wasn't gently, rolling it and squeezing it until he heard her let out a groan. He released it, "My apologies Penny, I got carried away."

She popped her mouth off his cock and swiping the spit from her lips with the back of her hand, she smiled at him, "Oh no Sheldon, it wasn't a moan of pain, completely the opposite, I like having them manhandled and played with roughly!" She immediately resumed sucking his cock, now her hand and mouth worked like a well-oiled machine. She knew she was getting him closer to cumming and when she climbed onto the bed and twisted around, her gorgeous ass was close to his chest. She let out a gasp, "Oh yes, yes Sheldon, play with my pussy. I've been without for so long, the longest I've been without since I came here from Nebraska."

He scoffed, "What about Howard?"

She sat up quickly and looked annoyed, "Why would you bring him up at a time like this, really Sheldon!"

He looked truly sorry and gave her a meek smile, "Sorry Penny, I was just trying to correct your statement. Please ignore my Foux Pas, please resume and I promise to try and not do that again."

It was her turn to scoff, "Unlikely Sheldon, very unlikely, but I accept your apology and will..." Before she could finish, he pushed her head back down and she had no other option, but to open her mouth and take his cock back into her mouth. She took it willingly and began sucking him harder and faster, still not able to take all of him into her mouth. She let out another squeal when she felt him part her thighs and slid his long, slender fingers under the short leg hole of her shorts.

Sheldon could not believe he had Penny, the gorgeous blonde Leonard was head over heels for, in his bed, sucking his cock, while he fingered her extremely wet and tight pussy. He used his other hand to once again uncover her gorgeous breast. He twisted her nipple harder on purpose and he was rewarded by another grunt from her throat and her lips picked up the pace, sucking him even deeper, still unable to take him totally into her throat.

Penny was panting wildly; she was completely blown-away that Sheldon knew what to do. She thought Naomi was pulling her leg, but she now knew Sheldon knew exactly what to do between her legs. She felt her orgasm; the one she so sorely needed began to build. She thrust her hips up against his active fingers and tightening them; she let out a loud grunt and started cumming. She slowed her sucking; she didn't want her teeth to bite down on his thick cock. Once she calmed down, she concentrated on her mission. She wanted his cum; she knew she couldn't fuck him, at least not tonight, not with Leonard in the next room. She bobbed up and down, her lips were nearly a blur and when she felt his cock leap in her mouth, she knew he was about to cum. She flicked her tongue up and down, stabbing at the sensitive flesh just below the head and she was rewarded a second time tonight, this time with more than a mouthful. She swallowed frantically, unable to do so fast enough, a couple drops escaped from the corner of her mouth and dripped onto her exposed tit.

Sheldon was exhausted and suddenly the good old Sheldon reappeared.

Leonard heard the commotion coming from Sheldon's bedroom and comes out into the hallway. He hears Sheldon blurt out, Please, Penny, enough. I have to sleep!"

She giggles, "Okay, well, you were great, thanks!" She sneaks out of Sheldon's room, her hair is disheveled, her lips are puffy and she's licking the remnants of Sheldon's cum from her lips. She tucks her one exposed boob back into her tank-top and smiles at Leonard, "Oh Listen, don't go in Sheldon's room. He's not wearing bottoms. She giggles again and heads back to her apartment to continue her quest on the computer. Sucking Sheldon off took the edge off and his fingers on her pussy, getting her off will hold her until her next quest.

Penny went off the deep end playing the online game, she even called Sheldon at the university and when he wouldn't answer, she called the Dean when she found out he was in a meeting there.

When Sheldon got back home, he broke into the room and confronted Leonard, "Leonard, you have to do something about Penny. She's interfering with my sleep. She is interfering with my work and last night she even interfered with my masturbation time."

"What do you want me to do? You're the one who introduced her to online gaming."

"Maybe so, but you're the one who said hello to her when she moved it. If you don't do something, I'm going to be very hard to live with."

"Are you saying, the past Sheldon was easy to get along with?"

He gave Leonard a derivative stare and replied, "Oh yes!"

"I'm going over there right now to speak with her." He went over and knocked on the door. He could hear her in there, but she didn't answer. He peaked his head in and she was locked in a battle online and completely dismissed his existence. "Hey, Penny?"

She threw up one hand, "Busy!" and returned to playing.

"Yeah, I see that, shouldn't you be at work?"

Her attention was focusing on the screen before her, "I don't work on Mondays."

He looked concerned, "It's Thursday!" He entered and closed the door behind him, "Listen, Penny..."

She was getting frustrated, in more ways than one, "Ugh! Queen Penelope AFK, WHAT?"

He stood back, scared, "Oh, um here's the thing. Um, sometimes people, good people, you know, they start playing these game. They find themselves, through no fault of their own, you know, kind of addicted."

"She getting pissed off now, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, get to the point. I'm about to level up here."

"If the person doesn't have a sense of achievement in their life, it's easy to lose themselves in a world where a false sense of accomplishment."

"Yeah, jabber, jabber, jabber. Okay, boys, Queen Penelope's back online."

She got stuck again and bothers Sheldon in his bedroom over and over again. She's so involved in the game; she even dismissed having another round of sex with Sheldon.

The following day in the cafeteria, Sheldon is so tired; he cannot even spar with Leslie Winkle. She calls him names and he doesn't have the energy to reply. She sits and blasts him again, "I heard you've been pulling all-nighters with Middle-Earth Barbie."

"She comes into my room. No one's supposed to be in my room."

"I would postulate she's escaping into the online world to compensate for her sexual frustration."

Leonard tries to defend Penny, "That's not what she's doing, Leslie. She's trying to shore up her self-esteem. It has nothing to do with sex."

She scoffs at him, "Everything has to do with sex."