Big Bang Theory Season 03 Ep. 01-03

Author's note: The series resets with this episode. Remember that as this story progresses, many times they resume the storyline as if never having sex before with each other. So is the case in this episode. Although Penny and Leonard's attraction at the end of season two continues.

One of my readers requested adding pictures of the new characters, but this is not allowed by Literotica. When a new character is introduced, I will put in parenthesis the character's real name so you can look them up on the internet.

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The four guys returned from the arctic expedition. Leonard, Howard and Raj were voicing their displeasure, while Sheldon responded that for him it was a hoot and a half. They hurried up to the apartment; Sheldon spoke to his mother while the guys unpiled their equipment. Leonard hurried out of the apartment, "I'm going to tell Penny we're back." He knocked on Penny's door and she opened it. She had a huge smile on her face, "Leonard, you're back."

"Yeah, I just stopped by to say--" She threw her arms around his neck and planted a hot kiss on his lips. He pulled back, "Yeah, so hi!"

She hugged him, "Hi!" She dragged him into her apartment, kissing him all the way and kicked the door shut.

Raj and Howard were in the doorway watching and Howard exclaimed, "Damn it, I should've gone over and told her we were back."

Raj scoffed at him; "Yeah, it was first come first serve." They went back into the apartment and listened to Sheldon go on and on about the great discoveries he made. They finally broke down and had to tell him the truth, "Please sit down Sheldon, we have something to tell you."

Howard began, "Look, we need to talk to you about something that happened at the North Pole. Sheldon, you remember the first few weeks we were looking for magnetic monopoles and not finding anything and you were acting like an obnoxious giant dictator? And when we finally got our first positive data, you were so happy."

"Oh yes, in the world of emoticons, I was colon, capitol D."

"Well, um, in actuality, what your equipment detected wasn't so much evidence of paradigm-shifting monopoles as it was static from the electric can opener we were turning on and off."

His jaw dropped and he stood up, "You tampered with my experiment?"

"We had to; it was the only way to keep you from being such a huge dick."

"Did Leonard know about this? Leonard's my best friend in the world. Surely Leonard didn't know."

Howard looked up at him, "Actually, it was his idea."

"Of course it was, the whole plan reeks of Leonard."

Back in Penny's apartment, she's ravishing him, kissing him continually, "I missed you so much."

He kissed her back, his hands are all over her tight body, "I missed you too."

"I couldn't think of anyone else."

His tongue was halfway down here throat, "Me neither." All of a sudden there was a knocking on the door, over and over again, "Leonard, Leonard, Leonard!"

Leonard whispered to Penny, "Do not make a sound."

Through the door Sheldon blurts out, "Whispering, "Do not make a sound," is a sound."

"Damn his Vulcan hearing...not a good time Sheldon." His hands are all over Penny, he can't wait to get her clothes off.

Sheldon starts up again knocking on the door, "Penny, Penny, Penny!"

She breaks his hold on her and opens the door, "What?"

"Hello Penny, I realize you're currently at the mercy of your biological urges, but as you have a lifetime of poor decisions ahead, may I interrupt this one?"

She comes back with sarcasm, "Great to see you too, come on in."

He hurried in and stood before Leonard, "Wolowitz has informed me of your grand deception. Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

"Yes, I feel terrible about it. I will never forgive myself. I don't expect you to. I'd appreciate it if you'd leave me with Penny for a session of self-criticism and repentance."

Penny breaks in, "Can someone tell me what's going on here?"

Sheldon turned to her, "What's going on here is, I was led to believe I was making groundbreaking strides in science, when in fact I was being fed false data at the hands of Wolowitz, Koothrappali and your furry little boy toy."

She looked to Leonard, "Is that true?"

He nodded, "It was the only way to make him happy."

"Why'd you have to make him happy?"

"Because when he wasn't happy, we wanted to kill him. There was even a plan. We were going to throw his Kindle outside and when he went to get it, lock the door and let him freeze to death."

Sheldon was shocked, "That seems like a bit of an overreaction."

Leonard shook his head, "No! The overreaction was to tie your limbs to four different sled-dog teams and yell "Mush!" Look, we kept the original data. You can still publish the actual results."

"Yes, but the actual results are unsuccessful. I sent an e-mail to everyone at the university explaining I confirmed string theory and forever changed man's understanding of the universe."

Leonard shook his head again, "Oh, see yeah, you probably shouldn't have done that. So write another e-mail. Set the record straight, it's no big deal."

Now Sheldon was being sarcastic, "You're right Leonard, that's not a big deal. All you did was lie to me, destroy my dream, and humiliate me in front of the whole university." He turned and left the apartment.

Penny stood in the doorway, "Oh, that poor thing."

Leonard approached her, "Yeah, I feel terrible." He tried to kiss her again, but she stopped him.

"Wait, aren't you gonna go talk to him?"

"Well, I --He'll be fine, the guy's a trouper. Come here!" He reached for her again, but she stopped him again.

"No, no, you're right. You shouldn't talk to him. I will!" She turned and headed over to talk to Sheldon.

Leonard was frustrated, "Man, I cannot catch a break."

Penny heads over to the other apartment and upon entering Sheldon's bedroom she finds him curled up in a ball on his bed. She looks amazing dressed in a long, red blouse that had straps that do little to hold her massive tits in. Her long blonde hair is curled inward and covered the tops of her exposed breasts. Beneath that she's in a tight pair of jeans. Stepping up, she sits beside him on the bed and starts to sing "Soft Kitty."

Sheldon breaks in, "That's for when I'm sick, I'm not sick."

"Sorry Sheldon, I don't know what your sad song is." She reaches out and gently strokes his back.

"I don't have a sad song, I'm not a child."

She tried to cheer him up, "Well, you know, I understand what you're going through."

Sheldon lashes out, "Really? Did you have the Nobel Prize in waitressing stolen from you?"

"Well no, but, uh, when I was in high school on of my friends heard I was gonna be named head cheerleader, I was so excited. My mom even made me a celebration pie. Then they named stupid Valerie Mosbacher head cheerleader. Big old slutbag!"

He sat up; "Are you saying that you think a celebration pie is even remotely comparable to a Nobel Prize?"

She was taken aback, "Well, they're pretty tasty."

Scooting up against the headboard he looked at her, checking out her tits that threatened to pop free from her top. "On a different but not unrelated topic, based on your current efforts to buoy my spirits, do you truly believe that you were ever fit to be a ...cheer leader?"

She sat there with a blank stare and finally replied, "Look, I just don't think that the guys and Leonard really meant to hurt you. They just told an unfortunate lie to deal with a difficult situation. You know what it's like? Remember the new Star Trek movie? Kirk has to take over the ship, so he tells Spock stuff he knew wasn't true. Like saying Spock didn't care his mom dies."

Sheldon was even more depressed; he sat back, "I missed Comic-Con and the new Star Trek movie?"

He started sobbing and rolled over onto his side. Penny put her arm around his waist and by accident her hand brushed his cock. She sucked in her breath when she realized how large it was. She felt him stiffen and then relax. She brushed against it again and pulled him over onto his back. "Maybe I can make things better by relieving some of your tension Sheldon. I've been known to do that very well when I was in high school, and yes while I was a cheer leader! I really relaxed the quarterback, some say a little too much, but I digress." Her hand now closed over his stiffening cock, "Would you like me to try and relax you, or at least make you forget about your problems for at least a little while?"

He looked up at her and smiled lightly, "Well, I don't know if it will work, but you can give it a try." He quickly unzipped his pants and pulled his pants and shorts down to his ankles. Kicking them off he lay back, "Okay cheer leader, let me see if you really are good at relaxing someone."

Penny's eyes bugged out, she was shocked at the sheer length and girth of Sheldon's cock and it wasn't even stiff yet. She was nearly in a trance as she was somehow, weirdly drawn to his cock. Leaning over, her long, silky hair swished back and forth across his thighs. Her hot breath was on the length of his cock and then her tongue slipped out and ran it up and down his cock, from the angry red, mushroomed head, down to his swollen nuts. A tiny moan escaped her throat as her lips now made contact with the thick, firm meat of his cock.

Sheldon wanted nothing more than to watch as this gorgeous green eyed blonde worship his cock. He was completely and utterly mad with Leonard, this along with having no release over the past three months, he wanted this, wanted it more than he could put into words. He was unable to keep his eyes open as he watched her tongue slip from those luscious lips of hers and bathe his cock in her spit. They closed and his head fell back onto the pillow as he let the exquisite feeling travel throughout his body. She made his toes curl and his legs tense up when he felt those lips close around his cock and begin sliding downward. He let out a gasp when he felt more and more of his cock slide into her hot, wet mouth. He always imagined it would feel this way, but his eyes popped open when he felt her nose against his belly. His eyes focused on her lips, the way they struggled to take the last two inches of his cock down her throat. He groaned out when she stopped and saw her tongue begin to flip around, tasting and sucking him.

Penny knew she made him forget what Leonard and the others did to him, even though it was just for a short time, she wanted to help him. She smiled up at him, although it was nearly impossible seeing her lips were stretched wide from the sheer thickness of Sheldon's cock. Her pussy felt like a swamp, she wanted to ride this cock, but resisted. She was saving herself for Leonard, if things could ever get resolved concerning this expedition. She pushed this out of her head and concentrated on sucking Sheldon off. Her hands began running up and down his legs. She could feel the knots in his muscles as he tensed up. She loved when his hands combed through her hair and she groaned when one hand drifted down and began toying with one of her stiff nipples. She felt his hand encompass her tit through her bra and her moans got even louder when he dipped his hand under the bra and twisted her fat nipple with his fingers.

Sheldon was so close, he wanted this to last longer, he even anticipated coitus, but that was cut short when he felt one of her fingers tickle and slip into his anus. He lost it and began dumping a huge load of cum down her throat. He came so hard and fast, it caught Penny off guard and she began gagging.

She pulled her mouth off his cock and the last three or four blasts covered her pretty face and dripping down between those luscious mounds of flesh. She reclaimed his cock and sucked what little he had left to give. She mouth came off his cock with a pop and she picked what cum was left on her lips.

Sheldon quickly dressed and ran into the bathroom for a warm washcloth. As he came out of the bathroom, Leonard was there.

"What's going on Sheldon?"

Sheldon scoffed at him as he hurried past him, "Penny spilled some of my milk and I'm getting a washcloth to clean it up, now out of my way before it stains!" He slammed the door in Leonard's face and gently wiped the mess he made off of Penny's glowing skin. "This doesn't change anything Penny, I'm still mad at your boy-toy, but this will be a secret between you and me. Yes, yes, I know I'm bad at keeping secrets, but no matter what, Leonard is still my best friend and I know this would seriously damage our friendship. I also wouldn't mind doing this and maybe more with you in the future." He winked at her, "Get my drift?"

She smiled as she was now cleaned up. She slapped him playfully and bellowed out, "You dog! I better get out there before he gets suspicious. I hope you feel better."

"Thank you Penny, I know you were just trying to help, but I don't know how I can ever forgive him for what he did, thanks again." He gave her a hug and ushered her out of his room. He whispered to her, "This is for your benefit Penny... You can't be in my room, people are not allowed in my room!"

She smiled at him and winked, "Well, I was only trying to help. See if I try that again!" She winked again and hurried past Leonard and out of the apartment.

The next day Leonard, Howard and Raj were back at the university, all clean shaven and raring to resume their duties there.

Sheldon was still pissed and tried to chock them with his fingers using the Darth Vader Force. Kripke came over and ragged on him and he left even more depressed than before. He was going to ruin things for Leonard and Penny, but he promised her what she did for him last night would stay between the two of them. He got up from his table and left the cafeteria.

That evening Leonard returned to Penny's apartment, trying to relight what started the day before. She answered the door with a huge smile on her face. She looked amazing wearing a burgundy flowered dress that showed off her figure nicely. He was excited and beamed back at her, "Since we got interrupted last night, I didn't have a chance to give you this." He handed her a tiny velour bag.

She took it, "Aw Leonard, you shouldn't have." She pulled it out and looked at it, not sure what it was. "Oh boy, ha, ha! What is it?"

"It's a snowflake for the North Pole."

She was stunned as she looked at it, "Are you serious?"

"Uh-huh. It'll last forever. I preserved it in a 1-percent solution of polyvinyl acetal resin."

She was speechless, "Oh God, that's the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me that I didn't understand."

He shrugged, "It's actually a pretty simple process. You see, cyanoacrylates are monomers which polymerize--." He was cut off as Penny stepped forward and planted a hot kiss on his lips. There were going hot and heavy until Howard and Raj came running up the stairs stopping them. Howard started in, "Red alert Leonard, Sheldon ran away."

They broke the kiss and Leonard blurted out, "Man, I cannot catch a break."

Penny put her gift back in the bag, "So how do you know he ran away?"

"I mean, he's not answering his phone, he handed in his resignation at the university and he sent me a text that said, "I'm running away."

Leonard was still trying his best to hook up with Penny, "Okay, thanks for letting me know." He turned and tried to push Penny into her apartment and she stopped him.

"Well--Leonard, aren't you gonna do something?"

He stopped and looked to Howard and Raj, "Well, of course I'm gonna do something. Uh, Howard, check the comic-book store. Raj, go to the Thai restaurant. I'll stay her with Penny in her apartment." Just then his cell phone began ringing, pulling it out of his pocket he looked at it, "Oh, damn it! It's Sheldon's mother." He answered it, "A break cannot be caught! Hi, Mrs. Cooper, he is? Sheldon went home to Texas. Yeah—No, I know he resigned. Yes, I guess it kind of is our fault. No, no, you're right. Someone needs to come talk to him. Don't worry; I'll take care of it, yeah, all right." He hung up the phone and let out a deep breath of air, "Alright new plan, Howard, you and Raj go to Texas, I'll stay here with Penny in her apartment." He turned and tried taking Penny into her apartment, but she stopped him again.

"You're not gonna go with them?" "Well, you know...I gave you the snowflake and we were kissing, and...Come on, I don't wanna go to Texas."

Howard cut in, "Oh, right, and I do? My people already crossed the desert once, we're done."

Leonard was grasping at straws now, he looked back and forth, "Trust me, you'll be fine, see you>" He turned and Penny stopped him again.

"Well, wait a second, Leonard. Come on, how can you not go? He's your best friend."

He tried to change her mind, "But I already saw him naked, just come here."

"NO! I promise I will be here when you get back. Just go help Sheldon."

"Really?"

She nodded, "Yeah, we waited a few months. We can wait a few more days." She leaned in and gave him a toe-curling kiss.

He responded when she pulled back, "Maybe you can."

She started laughing, "Go!" She closed the door as he left.

In the hallway Raj shook his head, "Boy, you cannot catch a break, can you?"

In Texas Mary Cooper was happy to have her genius home and she fed him his favorite food. As always she has to fight with him to pray before his meal, but after putting up a fuss, he prays with her.

He loves she carved a smiley face in his grilled cheese sandwich,

"So Shelly, do you want to talk about what happened with you and your little friends?"

He shook his head, "They're not my friends."

"All right, if you recall, when you were little we sat right here at this very spot and talked about the problems you had getting along with the neighbor kids."

"That was different. They were threatened by my intelligence and too stupid to know that's why they hated me."

Mary chuckled, "Oh baby they knew very well why they hated you."

When Leonard, Howard and Raj got to Texas they arrived at the Cooper's house. Leonard was in a hurry to return so he could finally jump Penny's bones.

Mary argued with Howard over alcohol and told him he could have a cola.

Sheldon came into the room, "What are they doing here?"

Leonard stepped up, "We came to apologize, again, and bring you home. Pack up your stuff and we'll head back."

Sheldon looked from his mother and back to Leonard, "No, this is my home now. Thanks to you my career is over. I will spend the rest of my life here in Texas trying to teach evolution to creationists."

Mary poked Sheldon on the shoulder, "You watch your mouth Shelly. Everyone's entitled to their opinion."

"Evolution isn't an opinion, it's a fact."

She raised her voice, "And that is your opinion."

He turned to Leonard, "I forgive you, let's go home." He hurried off to pack.

Mary Cooper chuckled, "Don't tell me prayer doesn't work. Now tell me Leonard, what's this I heard about your mother and Shelly, is this true?"

"Uh, well, I'm not sure. I was a little drunk and just kicked out of Penny's place, so I can't remember."

""Sure, we'll go with that, but when you talk to your mother, tell her to keep her hands off my Shelly or I just may have to try out her son." She smiled at him and looked him up and down.

Sheldon came out and they headed back, they made the redeye back to LA and Leonard immediately headed over to Penny's place.

Penny answered the door in her sleepwear. She immediately threw her arms around Leonard's neck and he found the strength to take her in his arms and carry her to her bedroom. All of their clothes seemed to evaporate and they were locked in a headed embrace, they were all over one another.

A problem arose, after a two long years of sexual tension between the two of them and the hype about being perfect, it was anything but.