Blake Ch. 12

I lied in bed, feeling like complete shit. I had made the trip to the bathroom six times this morning, unable to hold down any food. I was scanning my mind, trying to figure out what I had eaten in the last twenty-four hours that could be causing my digestive woes this morning, but nothing was coming to mind.

In fact, I hadn't eaten much at all in the last few days. I didn't have much time to eat on the weekends since moving in with Blake. We were taking full advantage of our living situation and we spent much of Saturday and Sunday in bed, fucking each other's brains out. Not that I was complaining. I would happily give up anything to be in Blake's arms and bed.

I stood up slowly, weak from lack of food and exhaustion. I cautiously maneuvered to the kitchen to get a glass of water and maybe some crackers. I had become familiar with Blake's apartment in the last four months of living here, but familiarity did nothing to help me move any faster. I was nauseous and my stomach was flipping like an Olympic gymnast.

At this moment, I was regretting letting Blake go to work this morning. He had offered to call out to stay home and take care of me, but I urged him to go to work. I didn't want to get him sick too, although I don't think that would have stopped him from heading to work. I seemed to be the only thing that could derail his work driven mind.

I had to stop in the living room and grip the back of the couch, as I was feeling woozy again. I closed my eyes trying to right my mind and not tumble to the floor. I wasn't sure if this reaction was due to the nausea or the dehydration, but I really wasn't liking it.

As my head finally began to clear, I heard the front door open, followed by it slamming back into the frame. I looked down the short hallway to see Blake, livid. He threw his bag down onto the ground with force. I had never seen him behave so violently. What was eating him?

I saw the wall clock out of the corner of my eye. Ten-thirty. Blake was never home this early. What the hell had happened?

Blake finally locked eyes with me and his expression instantly softened like usual; however, a sadness crept into his face that I had never seen before. I was still gripping onto the couch, trying to keep from falling over. I wanted to run to him and take him in my arms, but I knew I didn't have the strength. I could barely stand as is.

Blake closed the distance between us quickly and wrapped me into his arms, holding me tightly to his chest. I breathed in, smelling the amazing scent of my man. He kissed the top of my head and I could feel his cheek nuzzle against my hair.

When we finally split apart, Blake looked down at me with his beautiful ice blue eyes. I could see pain and anguish behind them, as though he had news for me. A knot grew in my stomach as I held his gaze. It was doing nothing to help my nausea.

"What are you doing out of bed, sweetie?" he finally asked.

"I needed some more water and I was hoping to get some crackers or something."

Blake scooped me up and carried me back to the bedroom, careful not to rock me. He laid me on the bed and pulled the covers over me.

"Let me do that for you, Kaitlin. I don't want you to leave this bed unless you have to."

Blake grabbed the glass on my nightstand and hurried off to the kitchen.

While he was gone, I was trying to think what could have possibly happened at work to set him off. Things the last few months had gone amazingly well at AdVanceMent. Profits were soaring, in large part to the successful acquisition and subsequent advertising campaign for Xcel technologies. Vance and Blake had become better friends for the first time in their lives, cutting down on work hostility. Speculation had been circulating that with all this success, much of which had been orchestrated by Blake, that Arthur would step down and hand the company over to Blake soon.

There was nothing I could think of by the time Blake returned with my water and a package of saltines. I took them with a gentle smile, which Blake weakly returned. I nibbled on the crackers, trying to think of a way to approach the subject without setting him off, but Blake did the work for me.

"Kaitlin, I have some troubling news and I don't want to tell you while you're in this condition, but I really have no choice."

I stopped chewing and gazed at Blake. For the first time in months, I was scared. Blake grabbed my hand, sensing my fear. He stroked the back of it gently with his thumb. As I gazed into his eyes, I saw the pain and sadness come to the front. This was bad, but at that point, I didn't know exactly how bad it really was.

"Carl and Desiree came by the office this morning with their lawyer. She's pregnant and claims I am the father."

My heart stopped in my chest and my already queasy stomach dropped, making me sicker than before. Tears were already stinging my eyes before I could fully process what he was telling me. Desiree was pregnant?

This couldn't be happening. This had to be an illness-induced nightmare that I would wake up from at any moment. Our lives were going perfectly, completely free of my bitch ex-roommate and her control freak of a father. All of a sudden, they were being thrust back into our lives, but this time they were smashing in like a wrecking ball, determined to destroy everything in their path.

I hadn't noticed I had stopped breathing until I was light headed and dizzy. I almost collapsed from it all.

"Kaitlin? Please, say something."

I looked at Blake and the sadness had manifested into tears that were now rolling down his cheeks. He looked completely devastated. I reached over, bringing my hand to his cheek, and gently wiped a tear away with my thumb. He closed his eyes, calming beneath my touch.

"Did she bring the positive test from the doctor?" I finally asked. I was doubtful this was all real.

"Yes."

"I want to see it."

"Kaitlin, no-"

"I want to see it, Blake," I said, nearly choking on my words. "I have to see it. Please."

Blake removed my hand, kissing the back of it before running off to the living room. As I waited in silence, I couldn't believe how quickly my world was falling apart. Desiree, the woman who was responsible for making my life hell for years, was possibly carrying my boyfriend's child. His first-born child. The idea made me even sicker than before.

Blake soon returned with a file folder that was warped and damaged. It was unlike Blake to keep any office supplies in such horrid condition, but I could only assume that this folder was the initial victim of Blake's anger. He looked hesitant as he gave me the folder.

He said nothing as I opened it and examined the contents. On top was a piece of paper with patient name: Daniels. As I scanned through, my heart felt like it was being ripped from my chest. It confirmed the worst possible scenario. Desiree was, in fact, six months pregnant. As I read further, the pain became worse. She was carrying Blake's eldest son.

Behind that, was a large black and white picture. It was the ultrasound photo of the baby. Upon seeing him, I crumpled over, fully succumbing to my tears. This was happening. My nightmare was real. I buried my face in the pillow, trying to escape.

I heard papers fall to the floor and felt the bed shift. Blake's arms wrapped around me and he pulled me into his strong chest as I was completely consumed by my sorrow.

"I'm so sorry, Kaitlin," Blake whispered to me.

It wasn't enough to calm me. Nothing was. I was going to have to ride this emotional wave out, but it looked like it was going to be never ending.

***

We had sat there in silence for hours. Blake continued to hold me and stoke my hair to keep both of us calm. I sat there silently, replaying the morning in my mind over and over. The only sound was my occasional breakdown into tears.

It was seven before either of us spoke.

"Kaitlin, you have to eat something. I can feel you withering away in my arms."

I didn't want to eat with the pit in my stomach, but I knew he was right. I reached over to my side table and grabbed the saltines, which had become stale. I nibbled on them and took an occasional sip of water, but I couldn't eat much as the pain was making me sick.

I looked down at my hands, fiddling with my fingers. I didn't know what to say to him. I knew we had to talk about this, but I didn't know where to even begin.

"If you want to leave, I understand," Blake finally said.

I knew I couldn't. My past with him already made that evident. No matter what happened, I couldn't be away from Blake. I reached over and reassuringly grabbed his hand.

"You know I won't leave you. But we need to talk about this."

"I'll tell you everything I know," he said, with some mild relief.

"What happened at the meeting?"

Blake took a deep breath, clearly preparing himself to revisit the painful memory of the morning.

"Desiree and Carl showed up with their lawyer. She is claiming that she is pregnant with my child and is suing me for medical costs, paternity, and eventual child support. Her father has gone public with the story, so it is all over the business pages. Arthur is being supportive, but he asked me to leave after the meeting while he handles the situation with the board. They aren't happy this."

I paused, mulling over everything he said, before continuing with my questioning.

"Did you use protection?"

"With Desiree, yes. I always wore a condom and each time we were done, I checked it for breaks."

"And?"

"Nothing. They were all still intact."

"She's six months pregnant, right?"

"According to her and the paper work."

None of this was adding up. How could Blake be the father of her six-month-old baby if he used protection? Then the realization hit me. The timing of when the baby would have been conceived was roughly when Blake and I started our affair.

"If that's true, you can't be the father. Kurt is."

A look of understanding flooded Blake's face as he remembered their false relationship.

"Kurt and Desiree were sleeping together when we started to. So if you didn't, then he did."

Blake grabbed my face, giving me a light kiss on the top of my head.

"I love you! You're a genius, baby."

Blake bounded out of the room. Moments later, I could hear him speaking animatedly to someone on the phone. I could only assume he was sharing our revelation with Arthur. I hoped that he'd be able to help sort this all out.

The fresh thoughts of Carl and Desiree were bringing back memories of the last time I saw him. Carl had burst into the boardroom and outed my affair with Blake to the Board of Directors. It was humiliating and it took me some time before I could face any of those men again. What was lingering with me now was what he had said as security dragged him off. He had vowed revenge.

Was this his revenge? It seemed poorly planned, especially since Kurt was most likely the father. This was going to be easily resolved in three months when the baby would be born and we would get the paternity test.

Three months. That was the key to Carl's revenge. The news already had this story and the board was already angry. In three months, Carl could do some serious damage to Blake's reputation, the company, and his life. This was Carl's true revenge: to destroy Blake's reputation and position at AdVanceMent. To take away his future. And there wouldn't be a thing Blake could do about it.

***

Blake was silent the entire two hour drive from the city to Arthur's lake house. He was still seething about being forced to take a leave of absence from the company. Since the news about Desiree's pregnancy went public, the board didn't want Blake anywhere near them. They were afraid of the potential fallout of his personal life, even though Arthur had told them it was all a lie.

Blake's public perception had suffered greatly in the last week, as papers speculated and Carl continued to lie through his teeth. The word now was that when Desiree had gotten pregnant, Blake had kicked her to the curb and tried to buy her silence, although none of it was true. Carl claimed that he even tried to force her to get an abortion, which he said was against his beliefs. To top it all off, my name was dragged into all this mess when Carl claimed I was the reason Blake had left Desiree and the baby. The world now knew of our affair and the painful feelings threatened to resurface.

But I couldn't let them. I had to be strong for Blake through all this. He was in a dark place, watching his life of hard work deteriorate before his eyes.

At Arthur's urging, Blake and I were told to spend some time away from the city. We didn't need the media mobbing us. Arthur had given us his lake house for the week. It was secluded and far away from the craziness of the city. I was hoping that this time out of the spotlight would help us work through this mess.

We finally pulled up to the lake house. It was small and intimate. From the outside, you never could have guessed that it was owned by a billionaire CEO. This wasn't the case on the inside.

The inside of the house kept the woodsy feel. The couches in the living room were deep brown leather and the tables were solid oak, yet they weren't polished. In the wall was a massive fireplace with a soft, faux animal pelt rug laid in front of it.

I stopped just beyond the doorway, admiring a world I should be used to by now. Blake didn't share my awe and excitement. He shut the door behind me and moved across the room to the staircase, without saying a word. He was depressed and I didn't know what I could do to make this better.

In reality, there was nothing I could do. I couldn't speed up time, so that the baby was born and we could prove Blake's innocence. I couldn't make the board overlook Carl's lie and let Blake work. They had the company's image to look after. I couldn't make Carl shut up, as much as I wanted too. We could argue the validity of Carl's word to the papers, but it was an uphill battle. Desiree was pregnant and if we called her a liar, we'd look like we were picking on her. The news media would make us bigger villains then they already were.

I climbed the stairs and found Blake in one of the bedrooms. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, his face in his hands. He was defeated.

I went to him, sitting beside him on the bed. I slung my arm around his shoulder, pulling him into me. It was the only thing I could think to do.

"I can't believe this happening" he said. "I've worked my whole life to get to where I am now. How can all that work disintegrate in an instant?"

I didn't know what to say. It was ridiculous that one lie could destroy his life, but here we were.

"The board wants me to resign," he finally admitted.

"How can they ask you to do that? You've done nothing wrong." I was shocked.

"They aren't convinced the baby isn't mine. Arthur has tried to convince them, but they said that my behavior with Desiree at the merger party a few months back was an indicator. They say because she was all over me, they don't believe she cheated."

This was insane. Blake had only been acting like he liked her to make me jealous, but now it was biting him in the ass.

"They don't know what they're talking about," I tried to reassure him, brushing the back of his hair.

"Kaitlin, I'm sorry you got dragged into all of this. It isn't fair to you."

I pulled his face to meet mine, gazing into his beautiful eyes.

"Blake, I'm not leaving you. Even if by some freak act this baby turns out to be yours, I'm not leaving. I love you and I always will. And if this baby is yours, I'll love him like he is my own."

Blake brought his hand to my cheek, a weak smile forming as relief flooded his eyes.

"You are the most amazing woman I have ever met. How could I have ever been so lucky to have found a woman like you?"

I leaned in, giving him the first kiss I had in days. It was gentle, sweet, and reassuring. I made no effort to push the issue, as much as I wanted to. Blake was finally starting to get better and I didn't want to push him into having sex with me, especially with baby talk still fresh in the air.

Blake pulled away from me with a new energy. He no longer looked defeated and ashamed. He wasn't his full happy self, but he was absolutely making strides to get there. He took my hands and looked into my eyes as a gentle smile spread over his face.

"I know I haven't been myself over the last week and it isn't fair to you. I'm not happy that I've been forced to leave work, but I am happy that I am here with you. So while we're here, I'm going to try to forget all that drama and enjoy my time here with you."

I returned his smile as we embraced.

***

The next morning, Blake and I woke up early to go fishing. I had never been an outdoorsy girl, but Blake had asked and I wasn't going to disappoint him. If it made him happy, I was going to do it.

It was cold when we go to the dock. Blake said early was the best time to catch fish, before the heat of the day set in and they sank lower beneath the surface of the water. Blake looked very much the outdoorsman. He dressed in a pair of cargo pants, heavy boots, and a heavy, black rain jacket. He hadn't shaved in the past few days, adding to his rugged appearance.

I was dressed in a pair of old jeans and boots, as well as a baby blue rain jacket. Blake could tell I wasn't made for the outside as he chuckled. I gently shoved him for mocking me. It was good to see him getting back to normal.

We spent much of the morning on the shoreline with our fishing rods in the water. While we waited for the fish to bite, Blake and I talked about remodeling our apartment, my upcoming high school reunion, and finally introducing him to my mother. We talked about anything besides the problem at hand. I wanted to keep that as far from our minds as possible while we were here.

After twenty minutes of waiting, the fish were finally biting. I was the first one to get a bite. Blake instructed me on how to reel it in and it wasn't as easy as I thought. The fish put up a fight and I had to rotate between pulling the fish in and letting the line slack for a little to keep the fish from snapping my line. After a few grueling minutes, I finally pulled in a small trout.

I was like a giddy little kid. Blake couldn't help but laugh at my energy and excitement. It was nice to see his beautiful smile in full force again. We continued to catch fish throughout much of the morning, keeping as many as we could. Blake planned to cook me a fish dinner tonight and he was going to do it all himself.

We made it back to the house around noon. I went to take a shower to wash the fishy smell off me, while Blake went to clean the fish. As I stood under the water, the smell of trout was making me nauseous. I had to fight to keep from retching as the sent violated my nostrils. It was unlike me to be affected by scents. I lived in the city, a breeding ground of the most disgusting and fowl aromas imaginable, so fish shouldn't be bothering me. I chocked it up to having never been around raw fish and thought nothing more of it. Once I was clean of the smell, my stomach calmed.

I went out to the bedroom and laid back on the bed, exhausted after an adventurous morning. Before I knew it, I was asleep.

***

"Kaitlin, sweetheart. Wake up." Blake's voice roused me from my deep sleep. My eyes rolled over to the clock on the nightstand. Six-fifteen. I had been asleep for over five hours. I never took naps this long, even when I worked my fifteen-hour shifts as James assistant. What the hell was the matter with me?

I groggily lifted my head to see Blake standing next to the bed. He was wearing a pair of dark worn jeans and a grey t-shirt. Beneath his tight shirt, I could see his amazing muscles. His hair was wet, like he had just come from the shower. He had finally shaved away his scruff of a beard, revealing his beautiful jawline. He was perfect and he looked like my Blake again.