Blood from a Turnip: Her Side

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I had killed the engine and glided into my driveway with headlights off. It was about 3 AM. Brandy was with me and a little bit tipsy. We planned to snatch up my boys and bring them to her house. The old saying was possession was 9/10's of the law. If Vince did not need to follow the law and was going to kidnap my children, then I could ignore that F'n restraining order.

Somehow Brandy had slipped the house key off Tommy. I headed to the boys room and Brady went to make sure Vance was still sleeping in the master bedroom.

The boys room was locked which caused me to curse. Brandy come back and told me the master bedroom was empty. I put my ear to the door and heard Vince's voice. If I had been mad before now I felt like spitting flames. I started pounding on the door.

"Dammit Vince open this door! You are not taking my children!"

No way was my kids going to be hiding out in some third world country in the middle of a drug war or living under a bunch of aliases in the great white North.

Brandy started banging on the door with me. I was getting more pissed by the second.

"Goddamn it Vince if I have to break this door down I will." I screamed at the door. "Open up now! When I smash this door down I will kick your ass for real this time!"

I knew I was no match in any physical fight with Vince. But I would make damn sure he would not leave that house with my children. I would lay down in front of his car first!

In frustration I started kicking the bottom of the door. After a few vicious kicks the plywood split, my foot when all the way thru the door to the calf. That caused a nasty scratch that stung like a bitch. I pulled my leg back.

"Goddamn It Vince that really hurt." I started kicking the door harder. The adrenaline was surging. I could sense myself losing control. It was like a wild women had taken over my body.

"I am going to fucking kill you!" I screamed at the door. I now understood how a bull in the bullfight feels. That door was like waving a damn cape at me.

Brandy was kicking at the bottom of the door now also. The plywood was breaking away. The small holes were getting bigger. The bottom façade was giving away more and more.

Suddenly there was a massive double "BOOM!" The bottom of the door exploded. Someone hit my legs with sledgehammers. I was dropped to the floor like a bowling pin. The bottom of the door was gone and a cloud of smoke rolled out past the jagged wood. I saw Brandy next to me in a heap. Pain more severe than I had ever experienced swept over me. Everything faded to dark..

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When I awoke my body was in bandages and I was handcuffed to a bed, I became hopeless and wanted to die. My prospects were prison, a life without my children. My legs and looks were as damaged as my future. I was told it could have been worse. The shotgun I was shot with contained shells that were old and powder weak. Still I fell into a deep depression and was put on suicide watch with a full psych, medical work-up. One of the big Pharma firms was doing a clinical trial on hormone replacement medication at the hospital. My doctor was able to interest the man in charge of the project in my case. It took a few weeks of different meds and doses, in addition to daily shrink sessions-but I pulled out of my hole. For the first time in my adult life, I did not suffer the terrible "blue" days or crazy happy swings. My expectations were not high, but at least I no longer wished to die.

I was eating what passed for lunch when there was a quick knock at my hospital door. Without being invited in, a lady with a briefcase and holding a file folder full of paper strode in briskly. She took a seat next to my bed. I hurriedly rearranged the bedcovers over my plaster encased legs. Once my pride and joy, I now tried to keep them covered whenever anyone was around. I felt self-conscious about my lower limbs, even around the nurses and doctors.

"Lisa, I have been assigned your case by the public defender's office" she began, without even a hello. "This is the deal-you are going to testify against Brandy, The ASA agreed to time served, a few months in county and 4 years of probation" She tossed a folder on my bed while searching for a pen in her suit pocket.

"I can't testify against Brandy! She is my friend!" I protested.

"You don't need a friend now, you need an attorney. This is your lucky day -for I am a lawyer. Now sign here, here, and here" she pointed to some places on a mass of papers in my lap. "You plead Guilty now and do some short county time. If we go to trial -your hair will be as gray as mine when you get out of the pen."

"My husband is trying to divorce me. If I plead guilty, I will lose custody of my children."

"You are going to lose custody of the children anyway." she sounded patient-like when I was trying to explain something to my young boys. "Lisa, at least this way you get to see your children by summer. Take the deal. Otherwise the next time you view the kids without bars and an orange jump suit will be at their graduation."

"If I'm in jail during the divorce hearings Vince will take everything!"

"Well not everything. I already spoke to your husband and blew some smoke up his shorts. He's not too big a jerk -as far as ex-husbands go." She gave a little laugh. "I should know I have three of those ex-bums" She pulled papers from a pile at her feet. "Here is the divorce agreement. You get to keep your car and some of the savings. He gets the house and 401K."

"What about my boys?"

"That you will have to work out with Vince, once you get released. I'm not a marriage therapist, but I would try to be in a better mood when you are trying wrangle visitation terms."

"Vince was never very understanding of my moods, I doubt he will show me any consideration now."

"My 2nd husband was always whining -calling me moody. One day he bought me a mood ring. We discovered that when I was in a good mood, it turned green. When I was in a bad mood, it left a big frickin red mark on his forehead." She smiled at her own joke. "Dumb ass should have bought me a diamond."

I laughed too in spite of myself. I was a still little overwhelmed and said so "This a lot for me to grasp. Can I have some time to think about it?"

"You have until I get out of this chair and walk to that door. Listen Princess, I have a couple dozen other cases that need my attention. So get it in gear. Brandy is getting the same offer from the ASA. If she takes the deal first, you won't have to decide. The state will decide every aspect of your life while you are in the joint."

I was still in a bit of a daze from all the new information "Can't you show a little sympathy. I am in the hospital."

"Princess you want sympathy? Look between shit and syphilis in the dictionary. Because you're not going to find it here"

"This is not right! I only wanted to have some fun, feel young again. No one was going to get hurt. That Damn Vince turned on me like a rabid dog. He made up a bunch of lies." I pulled the blanket off my lower body to uncover my legs. "The prick -he shot me! Now Vince gets everything? It's not fair!"

The lady Defense attorney rolled her eyes at my outburst. "Princess I know that big Pharma is pumping you full of wonder drugs to make you feel good, plus them shrinks sessions." She moved her chair closer to me. "But let's you and I cut thru all the psychobabble. You wanted to fuck around on your husband and convinced yourself he was OK with it. Hell you were going to go thru with your little hide the salami night even if he wasn't on board. You got caught and busted. Now I know what hubby did, and his story is pure crap. But you better deal with the cards you have in your hand, not the ones in your mind."

"No one was hurt by what I wanted! It is just not fair!" I repeated.

"Princess no one said Justice was fair-just blind. This is not Law & Order or some episode of CSI --with a cast of dozens searching for the truth. This is fast food justice, so get it now or go hungry. Time to shit, or get off the pot."

I sighed and reached for the pen.

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Brandy refused any deals. She still thought she could go back to the way it was before with Tommy and her Alimony. Brandy wanted to sue Vince and his homeowners insurance over her injuries. Brandy had big plans for her settlement money. The ASA was not happy and piled on the counts. The jury voted guilty on most of the charges. Brandy ended up going down for 7-10. She might get out in 4 years.

The divorce went thru while I did my 120 days in county. It was mostly boring with only my rehab and shrink sessions a few time a week to break the monotony. I wrote long letters to my boys, even a few to Vince. The long days mellowed out my anger towards Vince and his actions. (The drugs had a big effect on that I guess). Sometimes I even felt some affection when I thought about him, not the love of a wife -but more as the father to my children. I no longer had the mood swings of the past. While I missed the energy and drive my "highs" use to give me-I was thankful not to get the dark depressions the "blues" brought on.

Still I was surprised when Vince was at my release and offered me a ride. I thought he had come to gloat. It was the weekend, so I couldn't get to the bank for the divorce money until Monday. I figured to hole up at the YWCA or a halfway house until then. I dreaded riding the bus, therefore I took Vince up on his offer of a lift.

Once we started to drive, my temper flared.

"You didn't have to shoot me you know."

Vince came right back. "You didn't have to cheat on me, threaten to take the kids and bankrupt me you know."

I bit my tongue before I blurted out the words "This from the liar!"

Vince continued "Lisa, is this really how you want our first conversation to go?"

I took a deep breath and concentrated on the mental exercises we had done in therapy. Vince was right, no use rehashing the past. It no longer mattered what got us to this point. Where we went from this point was what was important. Besides I needed to be in Vince's graces if I wanted to see my kids.

I thought of everything ahead of me. I had to find a place to live, a job, cajole some time with my children out of Vince. I felt so weary. I just slumped back in the seat and stared at the floor silently while he drove.

After a while I noticed we were not headed downtown. Vince said he needed to make a stop first. I knew Vince was doing this to prolong my agony. I let Vince know I had a lot to do and pleaded to not add any more delays.

Was I in for a surprise! Vince and Tommy has rented me little condo close to my now former home. The kids were all there and I was over-whelmed. I kept hugging and kissing the boys as they showed me all around my new residence. The place had all my old furnishing , even pictures of my boys on the wall. I then got my second shock, Vince and Tommy wanted me to play Den mother and take care of their household and the children. It was a dream job! I would see my boys every day! Be a part of here lives! I didn't care about the pay. The only question I asked Vince was:

"When do I start!"

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The next two years flew by and we settle into a routine. The transition was pretty smooth. The biggest obstacle was Tommy's dog Candy. That scarred Doberman was always giving me the eye and a low growl when I arrived at the house in the morning. A few days of extra milk bones and chew treats had that mutt wagging his stubby tail in no time. I must admit Candy was very protective of the boys and the house. Woe to any salesman or solicitor who tried to talk their way past the doorway.

I filled my time in between the house with taking some classes on line and at the local community college. It took a while to get used to the stares my face brought. The "incident" had left a nasty scar on my right side from eye to lower cheek. I could have had plastic surgery, but the boys loved me the way I was. I no longer needed attention from others to provide my self-worth. Tommy and Vince encouraged me to go out, I had kept off the weight I lost in jail and was down to my old college volleyball playing figure, but I was never asked on dates. Some battery operated toys kept the edge off.

Tommy became quite the lady's man and was never short of dates on the weekend or even overnights. I admit I was a bit jealous when Vince went out. When Vince called me to ask if I could stay overnight while he was out on one of his dates the first time-it took a lot to bite my tongue.

One Saturday Tommy had taken the boys to a birthday party. I heard Vince singing in the shower, cleaning up after some lawn work. He had a terrible voice, it sounded like someone was killing a cat. I was putting some clean towels in the same bathroom. It was not like we never saw each other without our clothes so I ignored Vince's objections.

However when I glanced thru the shower door I felt myself get aroused. Vince was still in pretty good shape. Coaching the boy's teams and chasing the kids around had kept him and Tommy fit. I had put an end to the pizza and burger mealtimes. I did not begrudge anyone a little treat-but gone were the endless bags of chips and cartons of ice cream. The children were not going to get diabetes and become little couch potatoes on my watch.

"This was too good a chance to pass up." I thought. Vince had stopped going on dates. But I did the laundry and knew he had not been completely celibate.

I quickly undressed and rubbed some hand lotion inside myself. I had goose-bumps as I open the shower door and stepped thru a cloud of steam. Vince was rinsing off his hair with his back to me. I encircled his waist with one arm and pressed my breasts to his back. I grabbed his manhood and started stroking him. He became hard in an instant.

Before I let Vince turn around I told him how long I had waited for this. When he spun toward me I dropped to my knees and sucked his hard penis right down to the base. Vince did not protest, only gripped my hair and started sliding in and out of my mouth.

He must have been more horny then me, because Vince started spurting after just a few strokes. At first I was disappointed, than saw he was still hard. I never let go of him as I stood up, bent over at the waist, and leaned against the shower wall pulling Vince into me. He slide all the way home. I let out a satisfied moan-this was much better than any of my "toys". The combination of hot water on my back and Vince inside me was sending me over the top. It had been so long since I had had him I felt like a virgin. I pushed back at him and moved one hand down to rub my clit. We got a wonderful rhythm going for a few minutes and I could feel myself getting close. The orgasm started at the center of my body and spread to my whole being as I threw my head back and let the feeling overcome me. Vince was still inside me as I leaned against the shower wall to catch my breath. I was still turned on, so I pulled Vince out of my pussy and placed the head of his dick on my rosebud.

Vince hesitated. I thought he was worried about hurting me as I may not being lubricated.

"Vince I put some lotion in me-but go slow it's been a long time" I told him looking back at him over my shoulder.

He still paused "You sure?"

"Yes" I answered. "I know you like it there, and I want you there" I let go of him and spread my cheeks wider. I was so aroused I was pushing back at Vince.

He delayed to put some lotion on himself, then slowly started to slide into my ass. Vince would stop to let me get used to him, I would wiggle back as my sign I wanted more. Soon he was all the way inside my butt.

"Vince. Hold on a moment. Let me get used to you. You feel so big" I said.

After I felt myself loosen up, I started moving back and forth on his dick, rubbing my clit at the same time. I nodded my head at Vince that it was OK for him. He started with shallow strokes, but was soon pounding into my ass. Vince reached around taking over the job of rubbing my clit. I moaned as waves of pleasure coursed thru my body as Vince thrust into my tight butt. I seemed like just a few minutes before Vince gripped my hips with both hands and pushed in deeper and held himself in me.

"I gonna cum." Vince gasped.

I reached back to pull him tighter to me. "Yes, Yes, come in me!"

I felt a bit of his semen in my bowels as he pumped a few times before pulling out.

We washed each other off before I was half dragged and half carried to the bed soaking wet, embraced in a kiss. Vince threw me down on the bed and dove between my legs.

Lordy, that man still remember how to use his tongue and fingers. I was a limp rag by the time he entered me again. I got him off two more times and I do not recall how many times I came from his dick, tongue and fingers.

Afterwards we lay together and it felt just like old time. I decided to go for broke.

"Vince the past is water under the bridge. Do you think we can start anew again?"

I knew we would never have the crazy type of love when we were first married. I thought we could have a more mature kind of affection. Based more on comfort, compatibility, mutual interests and our children-rather than raging hormones. We had both grown. I no longer judged my value by the amount of attention others paid to me. I knew what now mattered most in my life-it wasn't what, or how much other people thought of me.

I was shocked when Vince replied this had been a mistake. He started talking about me leaving, getting another job someplace taking care of some senior.

I put my hand over his mouth and gripped him tight. Blurting out. "No Vince, please- I just need this right now in my life-you must understand that. It has nothing to do with you or the kids."

I couldn't give this up now. It was my reason for getting up in the morning, a lifeline. I loved being with the boys and life I had now. It gave my life meaning.

However when Vince heard me say. "I just need this right now in my life-you must understand that. It has nothing to do with you or the kids." He shot up and away from me like I had stabbed him with an electric cattle prod. He rubbed his eyes for a minute then looked straight ahead. Had I spooked him that bad about getting back together?

Vince did not even look at me when he said "Lisa the last time I heard the sentence from you- "I just need this right now in my life-you must understand that. It has nothing to do with you or the kids"- we were in this same room and you were getting ready for your date. The date that ended our marriage. Hell I think I was sitting at the same spot on this bed."

I was stunned by Vince's statement. I could not recall the exact words from our conversation that night, but from the venom in Vince's voice, it was clear he still had a clear memory of every word and phrase. I did not mean to repeat a statement from my terrible "date night". It was obvious that Vince still had a lot of emotional trauma. When I first started taking care of Vince, Tommy and the boys, Vince had avoided being in any room with me alone. I started leaving right after the boys were put to bed as I saw how uncomfortable I was making Vince. After a few months I thought he had gotten over it. Now it was clear Vince's wounds had not healed. My words coming back from that night had had ripped that wound open. I had to let Vince know I had changed. Times had changed.

"I am not a bad person Vince." I told him.

"Ya I know --the old cliché' You're a good person who did a bad thing."

"That was a long time ago. I know it does not help-but it was not really me back then."

"Well I really wish it wasn't me back then-but it was."

I thought I could appeal to Vince religious nature. "Vince I go to church with you every Sunday. Can't you forgive and forget?"

Vince did not budge on his stance. "It is not about forgiveness and forgetting. It is about trust. Lisa even as well as things have been between us-the Once bitten, Twice Shy analogy- still applies."