Breaking Jen Ch. 01

Jen looked like she always did, just maybe a little older. No taller than 5'6, sandy blonde hair to her shoulders and pale blue eyes. Usually in accounts like this the author will give you the broad strokes about someone's appearance and then just let the reader fill in the blanks with their own imagination. Normally I would do that also, but in Jen's case I can give you an almost exact reference as to the way she looks.

In certain photos and from a certain angle you would swear you were seeing Kirsten Dunst's twin sister. That's not a good thing. During those first years that I tried to forget about Jen, even just seeing Kirsten Dunst on a movie poster or on a magazine cover would make my blood run cold.

No offence to Kirsten Dunst, but they looked so much alike that it was just an unwanted reminder for me. (For anyone unclear about the actress I'm referring to then go see a 'Spiderman' movie...any of them except the latest one).

Jen was cautious. She avoided eye contact at first before she became more comfortable. When our eyes finally did lock I turned to stone. I was cold and resolute. I gave her nothing.

She knew very well the anguish she had put me through 5 years earlier and I guess she half expected me to show anger or hatred, but all I gave her was that man of stone. Even if I did have something to say I wouldn't have had much time to say it anyway. This was all just a passing encounter on the street, nothing more. (And that's probably the way it should have stayed).

She didn't affect me anymore and I felt calm. I began to study her, maybe trying to figure out how this seemingly innocent girl (looks can be deceiving) had such an effect on me in the past. Actually I could see why I fell for her. To quote a wise old man who lived long ago (In a galaxy far, far away).....'The force was still strong with her' (not to trivialise matters, but throwing in an old Star Wars quote amuses me).

She did all those familiar little things that drew men to her. All those cute little gestures and mannerisms that made you want to sweep her off of her feet and be her knight in shining armour, only this time I didn't feel that way at all. I knew her all too well and what she was capable of.

In the end it was a pleasant conversation and business cards were exchanged. We said our good-byes and I wondered if I'd ever see her again. I honestly didn't care either way.

If you're wondering why I don't elaborate more on the words we exchanged the truth is that I don't remember them. I had often wondered how I'd react or feel when I saw Jen again. The reality was that I felt nothing. It had no meaning to me.

Maybe we talked about the weather or maybe we had discussed the possible cure for cancer, It's not important. What happened not long after however, was important.

Two days later I received a pleasant e-mail from Jen saying how much she enjoyed meeting me again. That seemed a little odd to me. I didn't recall any sign of enjoyment or even a smile from her when we had met.

The next part was even more surprising and to be honest, slightly disturbing for me. Jen wanted to meet again. She wanted arrange a coffee date and an 'official' catch up. Thinking back on our past it did seem to be in keeping with the way I remember Jen operating.

It's also worth mentioning that for all she knew I was probably the same man she had known five years ago. She had no way of knowing what I had become. If she had known that, then I am certain she never would have sent me that e-mail.

When I thought about it that way, the idea of meeting for coffee suddenly became a very interesting prospect to me. What would I see with my new, un-feeling eyes? What discoveries would I make about the person who had inflicted so much pain on me in the past?

I sent back my reply and informed her of a certain cafe and a time I would be there. I was even going to take it easy this time. This was purely an intelligence gathering exercise and I would be a complete gentleman...unless.

There was one huge caveat to my good behaviour, something that Jen did not know. Here is where it is important for you to fully understand me. Even the worst of people get a second chance from me. That is extremely important for you to know that.

If I could change as radically as I had, then there was every chance Jen could have changed too. She would be given every opportunity to prove that she was a better person now. But.....If she even tried to pull her old tricks or flirt her way into my good books then the gloves would come off and a lesson would need to be given.

In all honestly I hoped she would pass my test, for my sake just as much as hers. I hoped for that very much (which was uncharacteristic of me).

She emailed her reply shortly after and the date was set.

I arrived at the cafe very early and found a table I liked. I chose a seat in the corner with my back to the wall, that way I could observe everyone coming in or out of the cafe. It was a position of control and when I felt satisfied with the arrangement I ordered a cup of coffee.

Fifteen minutes later I saw her arrive and I watched quietly as she nervously scanned the cafe for a familiar face. I let her search a little while longer before I put my hand up and waved her over.

Just like our first meeting, the conversation was tense at first, but to my surprise even I soon loosened up and the conversation flowed freely. There was much shared experience between us even if a lot of it in the past had been bad.

She began with an apology for the things she had done to me in the past which was a good start I guess. Actually that did go a long way toward smoothing out the conversation, and I have to admit that the signs looked good. Perhaps Jen had decided to join the human race after-all.

I always tend to lose track of time when engrossed in conversation, but I became conscious at some point of wanting our coffee date to end. This was not because I was having a bad time, but because I'm a firm believer in quitting while you're ahead. This had been a good start so I was anxious to put an end to it before something happened to take the shine off of the meeting. (In my experience something unfortunate will always happen if given enough time).

My instincts turned out to be correct. I had never in my life wished to be proven wrong more than at that moment, but that's not how life works it seems.

It was about 40 minutes into our conversation when she nervously leaned forward and said quietly, "I know I was terrible to you, but do you know what? I really miss all those dirty things you used to do to me. Nobody has ever done half of those things since you. I think about it a lot."

I felt her leg brush up against mine under the table as she said it.

The disappointment I felt at that moment could not be underestimated. To most people what she did and what she said might have been dismissed as harmless, but to me it spoke volumes. The old Jen was clearly alive and well and up to her old tricks all over again.

This was her modus operendi. This was how she manipulated people and how it always started. All of her kind words suddenly meant nothing to me.

Sadly, there was now only one way this could go.

The change inside me was rapid and automatic as I began to run through my standard scripts and structures. Up until a few seconds ago I had no intention of using them on her, but it was out of my hands now, she had chosen this, not me.

I know what I just said might confuse a lot of people so perhaps some explanation is necessary.

I have what I do down to a fine art. I can say that without a word of a lie. When it comes to a certain type of female (roughly 65% fit that psychological profile), I have merely to run through certain verbal structures containing triggering subjects and key phrases. Body language and intonation are also key. The result is a foregone conclusion. There is nothing 'hit and miss' about any of this. I can identify more or less straight away if any given female fits that profile. Jen most certainly did.

(Note: Before any of you even think it, I do not use any form of hypnosis or NLP. This is not the 1980's people. The assumption that I control someone or take away their will power is a false one. Why try to control someone when all you need to do is guide them in the right direction and then let human nature take It's course? You can leave all those 'self help' notions to those tacky Anthony Robbins clones. In my book they are no better than used car salesmen.)

This notion may be hard for some people to grasp or believe. I'm fine with that. They don't have to believe in it for it to work on them. Chances are they won't even realise they are being manipulated, it will all just seem like it's their idea. If you ever meet someone like me you won't even know it, I only hope that when you do, you are both on friendly terms. But I have said too much already.

Also I'm sure that many of you will be curious as to what Jen was talking about when she referred to all those 'dirty' things I used to do to her.

Well it wasn't in the same league as the things I do now but it was still pretty interesting. I would tie her up, maybe blindfold her. A good hard spanking used to set her off pretty spectacularly and as soon as it was over she would waste no time in straddling me and riding me good and hard until she came very loudly.

It's fair to say she had an untapped freaky side. She would often tell me she had fantasies of me tying her to a chair and then being made to watch me fuck another girl as a way of punishing her. Like an idiot I was too in love with her to do it back then.

I looked Jen squarely in the eyes, and then, knowing full well what I was doing, began the process.

"A lot has changed since you were around." I said calmly before continuing. "I can tell right now that you're not suitable for what I do."

"Getting a little ahead of ourselves aren't we?" Jen replied with a smile and went on. "I wasn't offering and I wasn't suggesting we jump in the sack, and besides that, I remember very well what you do and it'll take a lot more than that to scare me!"

This was all very familiar territory. Once upon a time I even enjoyed all that power-play banter we used to share, but that was a long time ago.

"You may remember what I did five years ago, but you have no idea who I am now and what I get up to in the privacy of my own home."

"Elighten me." Jen replied, clearly fascinated and drawn in.

"You really want the truth?" I was having fun with this now. It was all just so easy.

"Of course. Tell me the truth, if you dare."

"Fine." I took a long pause and drew out the moment before beginning.

"I take dirty girls like you and I punish them. I spank them till they sob uncontrollably and then tease them until they beg for me to make them come. They come for me in filthy and degrading ways and they do it over and over again until it drives them insane."

My tone was unwavering and my eyes never left hers. Nothing about my demeanour suggested that I was being anything but deadly serious.

"Fuck!.........You had me at 'I take dirty girls'!" Jen replied, clearly stunned by what she had heard.

"I think we're done here." I said bringing the coffee date to an abrupt end. The timing of this was deliberate and intentional as you have probably already guessed.

"Christ you really know how to make an exit!" Jen interrupted as I got up to leave. My sudden decision to end our meeting had taken her by surprise.

"Thank-you for the conversation Jen. It was nice to see you again. Best of luck with whatever it is you chose to do."

I shook her hand. I left immediately. I didn't look back.

Like clockwork, two days later I received a follow-up e-mail from her. Two days is the magic number for this kind of contact. One day seems too eager but three days seems too complacent.

She thanked me for the coffee and then went on to say... "I can't get the last part of our conversation out of my mind. I'm very distracted by it. I'm dying to know what you meant when you said you made all those girls come in filthy ways. You weren't exactly clear about that. Would it be so wrong if I asked you to show me what you mean?"

And there it is girls and boys. It's almost disappointing how easy it really is isn't it. In truth this was far easier than most similar situations, but in this case I had the benefit of knowing Jen and what made her tick. While I haven't shared with you all that I said to her during our coffee date I have given you enough information for you to get a very firm grasp on the situation.

I'm not a monster. I don't get off on just hurting people. There has to be intense pleasure for the female in everything I do. It's giving pleasure that drives this whole process for me and I've never seen a girl come harder than when she is pushing her boundaries and living out her dirtiest fantasies. Sometimes a little pain and adrenaline turns a great experience into something they will remember for the rest of their lives.

Long before I ran into Jen on the street I had already come up with what I considered to be the perfect lesson. It was the most beautiful and the most intense session and it was only to be used on either the bravest, or in this case, the worst of women. An attitude adjustment and a sexual experience unrivalled by any other.

As luck and fate would have it, it would now be Jen who would turn out to be it's first lucky recipient. It was clear to me that she had already chosen that fate anyway.

I even felt that this experience could be the making of her. This could be the key to her transformation into being a good and decent human being.

There would be intense and almost unbearable pleasure in what I had planned for her....but let's not forget that she had hurt me very badly in the past. If I was to give her what she wanted then there would have to be some cruelty involved to fulfil my own sense of justice.

There had to be some kind of payback for what she had done and it wasn't going to be as simple as a spanking. It would be a real experience that would result in a constant reminder that all her actions had consequences.

It would be an intense sexual experience containing both punishment and reward.

It would be a lesson in both causality and consequence.

Her session would be structured and deliberate. Her fate would be placed entirely in her own hands at all times. If Jen was able to keep her head and control her desires, then she would receive nothing but pure pleasure. But.....for every lapse in control there would be a price to pay and a reminder of her weakness.

Every climax would come with its own consequence. A lesson she should have learned all those years ago but apparently never did. Back then it was her pleasure that brought me suffering, but very soon she would bear all the responsibility for her own actions.

Even at that point I gave Jen a way out. When you get right down to it I really did give her so many chances to save herself.

I even e-mailed her back with a warning.

'Jen. I think you mis-understood my intentions. You and I have history. There are many unresolved issues and to be honest I've never forgiven you for the things that you did. If you are suggesting that I simply overlook all you have done and engage in some simple mutual act of gratification then you do not understand the situation.

However, if you desire to atone for your sins then that is another matter entirely. The price for your atonement will be your full sexual submission over a period of my choosing. Your punishment will be intense but the pleasure will be unlike anything you have ever experienced.

You may consider this as both a promise and a warning.'

Interestingly Jen's reply took an entire week to arrive. It was a process that I was familiar with. No doubt she would have dismissed my e-mail at first glance but it would have almost surely crept under her skin. Within a couple of days it would have become a source of great distraction for her.

In her confusion she probably would have changed her mind many times before she finally sent the inevitable e-mail that would start the ball rolling.

Here's part of the reply e-mail she sent.

'......and I know I'm probably going to regret this, but god I have to know....I think about what you said all the time. I know you will make me pay for being such a bitch to you...god...I think that thought is turning me on even more. I don't even know what you're gonna do to me...and that just makes me want it even more...please just tell me what to do and I'll do it.'

And so it began. I told her to keep the weekend free and I also made it clear to her that for a period of twenty four hours her body would become my property. She would fulfil my every whim and obey my every word until I chose to set her free.

If you think that she might have had an issue with any of that or was perhaps defiant in some way then my simple response is this. Once you take charge and clearly instruct a certain type of woman about what you want and expect, then she will just do it. I'm not a misogynist. I'm telling you this because that has been my experience.

Many women just crave a strong male to take charge, but it has to be someone they respect and trust. This does not lessen the role of women, it's just a simple truth that people don't talk about for fear of being labelled a 'sexist'. Like I said earlier, humans are complex creatures.

Jen's instructions were simple, but for me it was all the things that she didn't know about yet that were complex. There were many preparations to be made.

She was instructed to arrive at my place on Saturday evening at the prescribed time. What she wore also indicated what her role and status would be over that weekend.

She would become a good little slut for me...she would wear the tightest dress, the highest heels and the nastiest lingerie she could find...and she would do it all for my pleasure and enjoyment.

The fun was just beginning.

I immediately made an important call to a very close friend of mine called Tracy (Yes, I'm referring to the very same 'Tracy' I mentioned earlier. The Tracy that fucked that sweet little school teacher with a strap-on).

She was almost beside herself as we discussed my ideas for Jen's punishment. She was flattered and excited to be given such a pivotal role in the re-education of Jen and she even added a few touches of her own which turned out to be pure genius.

I really should tell you a little about Tracy because she will factor heavily in what you are about to read.

She was a nurse once upon a time, but I suspect that the role of a nurse required a person to have a little more empathy than Tracy possessed. Sympathy is not one of her strong points either. For that reason alone she was the perfect partner in crime during many of my conquests.

She now calls herself a 'Body Modification Specialist', which just means she does body piercings and hair removal at the local beauty shop. You could say that pain and discomfort are a minor by-product of a job well done for her.

Her hair always seems to be dyed jet black and if I was forced to put her into a category (which I am loathe to do but it may help matters) I would describe her as a sort of slutty emo/goth chick. I'm sure you know the type, short skirts and fishnet stockings with boots. She wore those clothes as if they were some kind of uniform practically every day.

There's no denying that Tracy has that dark quality that seems to attract both males and females in equal amounts and seeing as Tracy has an equal opportunity policy with both males and females it all makes for a very successful combination.

Tracy and I met up in person for a final discussion on the night before it was all due to go down. She would be bringing her full bag of tricks with her on that fateful night. Her skills and expertise were to play a key role. I told her to spare no expense and that I would be covering all the costs involved. She just needed to be ready to step up and play her part when the time came.