Cheaters Never Win Ch. 01

It was Thursday afternoon and "men's day" at the Windy River Country Club where I had a standing date to play golf with three of my friends. We play golf every Thursday afternoon from the first part of April until the end of October with rare exceptions. Today was one of those exceptions. John, one of our foursome, had called me at 11:00 a.m. and said, "Sorry buddy, but Rod and I will not be able to make it for golf this afternoon. We have an emergency meeting to go over some blueprint changes on the hospital addition project we are working on."

They work together at an architectural firm and I knew he wouldn't back out on golf unless he absolutely had to. "I apologize for the late notice," he said, "but we just do not have any alternative but to attend the meeting."

I told him, "I totally understand, don't worry about it. Dave and I will have to find a couple of other pushovers to give us some of their money."

He laughed, "I know you are happy to let us off today because you will save lots of money."

We both said goodbye with, "See you next week."

I called Dave, one of my best friends, and mentioned the circumstances to him and he said, "As long as John and Rod can't make it, why don't we take the afternoon off from golf too so I can catch up on some projects at home. That will free up my Saturday for something else."

I love to play golf but I wouldn't miss it if we skipped one day either so I agreed, but only after giving him some shit for the change in plans. We agreed to get in touch Friday night to see if we (he and his wife Carol and me and my wife Janet) could connect up sometime over the weekend for cocktails or dinner or both.

I headed home after lunch hoping that Janet and I could do something together for the afternoon. When I drove into the garage her car wasn't there and I cursed to myself for not calling her as soon as I knew about the change of plans. Oh well, I thought, as long as she isn't home I might as well make the best of it and do some of the "honey do" projects that I had on my list too. I went into the house and looked around for a note from her, but there was none. I also checked the answering machine and there were no messages on it so I had no clue where she was. Then I remembered we had caller ID that saved the last 25 calls we received so I looked at the history to see if there was any clue as to where she was.

To my surprise the last three calls were from a number I recognized. They were from Marty's phone. I knew Marty because for a couple of years he was part of our foursome. He quit playing golf about a year ago because he had a problem with his back, but he had not left the country club. He was still a social member and I saw him there on occasion. After he quit golfing John got Rod (a man he worked with) to play with us in his place. Marty was one of John's friends but I knew him too. I looked back to Wednesday's calls and there were two calls from Marty's phone then also. I checked back over the entire 25 saved numbers and 19 of them were calls from Marty's phone. I knew that Janet did not get along that well with Marty's wife, so I couldn't imagine why she would have been talking to her. I was bewildered, just what was going on here?

I decided to call Janet on her cell phone and when she answered I asked her, "Hi honey, what's happening?"

She said, "Nothing much, I was just vacuuming the living room. What's up with you?"

Now, I was standing in the kitchen and I didn't hear the vacuum cleaner running and was pretty sure she wasn't in there since her car wasn't home, but I did walk in there just to be sure. No, she isn't in there! I told her, "Not much here either. The guys all had other things to do today so we are not golfing. I thought maybe I would come home and catch up on some of the 'honey do' projects. I will see you in a little while."

She said, "Oh! Oh, okay, but I might not be there when you get home. I have to run to the store to pick up a few things."

She sure was thinking fast on her feet, if she was on her feet. I am not without my own wits either, so I suggested that I could stop at the store for her as long as it was on my way home. She hesitated a moment, but then said, "Ok, that will be great."

"What is it you need?" I asked.

"Just a minute, I have to go get my list." Damn, I married one smart and obviously devious woman. "Pick up some milk, eggs, paper towels and some steaks for Saturday night, oh, and maybe some yummy desert in case we have company," she added.

"Ok, bye honey," I said. "I will see you in a little while."

She said, "Goodbye."

I figured I better get out of there for a while to see what happened. She obviously wasn't home now, but would she get back here in a few minutes? I just needed to get away and think this through. I got in my car and drove to the store but didn't go right in. I sat there thinking for a while first.

Janet and I had been married for almost four years. We didn't have any children but were thinking about having a couple sometime in the near future. I was 32 and she was 28 and we had met about six years ago after I had gotten out of the Marines. We were both in college at the University of Illinois, she a freshman and I finishing up my last two years. We met and dated off and on for almost a year, then pretty steadily for a year. After I graduated we were married and she has continued to go to school part time to finish up her bachelors degree and get her masters degree. She is almost finished but has been taking the summer off this year.

She is a very pretty woman with a very nice figure and she has a wonderful personality to go with her looks. Janet is very well liked among our friends and family and she almost always turns heads when we go out. I can get a little jealous if men pay too much attention to her, but I have never acted on that jealousy in a way that would upset her and she has never given me reason to doubt her faithfulness to me.

Janet was my love, my very best friend, my confidant, my life. Ever since we had been dating steadily I thought our minds and hearts were melded together. I could sense her feelings and she mine. I could smell her fears and she mine. I could feel her heartbeat quicken when I looked at her and she could feel the desire in me when she walked past me and I watched her go. There were lots of unspoken messages that flowed between the two of us on a daily basis. We just knew each other so well and were bound together so tightly that we were truly one.

What could have happened here? I never knew Janet to lie to me ever, and I couldn't see any reason for it now except that she was up to something I wouldn't like very much. I knew she didn't like Marty's wife all that much, but there were lots of calls from his number. If it wasn't Marty's wife then was it Marty? Then it hit me! At the last country club social event about two months ago he had been dancing a lot with Janet. At the time I was a bit jealous because she seemed to be enjoying his attention way too much, but I let it slide because he and I were friends and had been close because of the golf matches. As I thought about that, I recalled that we had had a bit of an argument that morning and she was still upset with me when I got home from work. I don't even remember what the argument was about, but she was rather mad.

It also dawned on me that the "connection" between her and I that I just mentioned hasn't been as strong the last couple of months. Has I been lulled into thinking everything was still the same? Obviously I had, but now I knew that something was going on and I was going to get to the bottom of it.

I went into the store and bought the groceries we needed and headed home. When I got there Janet was just getting out of the shower and told me, "I just finished cleaning the house and thought I would get cleaned up myself. Thanks for getting the stuff from the store. Why don't you put it away and I will be down in a little bit."

I have never been one to sidestep problems, I guess my marine training has taught me to face life head on and without hesitation, so when she came downstairs I asked her to sit down because I had something I wanted to discuss with her.

I said, "Janet, you are my wife, my love, my lover and my very best friend in the whole world. I have been here for you and you for me since we started to date steadily. You are the one person I turn to when I need a rock to stand on and I hope you feel the same way."

I looked into her eyes and could see a tear start to form. I continued, "I have to tell you, for the last couple of months I feel like there is a wall being built in our relationship and that wall has shut me out from your inner self and I don't like it at all. Have I done something that created that wall?"

I saw her shaking her head, but no words came from her lips. I continued, "Please talk to me Janet and let me know what is happening to us. I can't bear to have us grow apart like this."

She had a tear running down her cheek now, and she looked down at her feet and said, "Paul, I don't know why you feel there is a wall being built between us. I love you and I know you love me."

"Then why can't you look at me when you talk to me?" I asked.

She glanced up at me with a shocked look on her face then looked back down and replied, "I guess there are some things I have to work through, I am sorry you feel there is a wall between us," and with that she got up and ran upstairs crying.

Well, I knew that we had some major problems going in our marriage now. I pretty much suspected what they were, but she wouldn't talk to me and I had no proof of anything so I decided to see what would happen. I walked up to the bedroom and talked to her through the bedroom door. "Janet, if you want to talk to me, I am here for you. I love you and want to help you with whatever is bothering you, or work on anything I have done that is making you unhappy, please talk to me when you are ready."

I went outside and began to work on the projects. My heart was aching, I don't know how to describe it to you, but I felt pretty empty inside and I don't care if I was a big tough marine, the tears flowed, and I felt pretty vulnerable. I didn't know what I would do if I lost Janet, if she wasn't my wife and lover. I just felt so powerless and weak. I was in a panic to be honest.

Janet did not come down for dinner and when I checked on her at 8:00 pm she was sound asleep so I went into the spare bedroom to sleep for the night. In the morning I got up and went to work early so we didn't talk in the morning. I called Dave and told him that I thought we probably wouldn't be doing anything together that night or on Saturday either for that matter, but I asked him if he could meet me for lunch.

When we met for lunch I explained to Dave what had happened and asked him what he thought of the whole situation. He dropped a bomb on me. He told me that he and Carol had suspected something was going on between Janet and Marty right after the country club social gathering. Carol had seen Janet's car in Marty's neighborhood. I asked, "Why wouldn't you say anything to me?"

He said, "We talked about it but felt we ought to stay out of it because we really didn't know what was happening."

"Ok, I can understand that", I said. "Please don't tell anyone that you and I have talked, not even Carol. I want to figure out what I am going to do about this and I don't need a lot of gossip and outside input."

I decided that I would have to have proof of her infidelity before I could handle the situation. I tried to attack it head on, but her refusal to talk to me or acknowledge a problem growing between us told me I would need to have proof before I confronted her with specifics. I took the afternoon off and drove over to Marty's house to see if her car was there. It wasn't so I didn't know when they might meet again. I called home around 4:30 p.m. and told Janet I would be home at 5:00 p.m. She said she was happy I was getting home early.

When I arrived Janet was warm and caring. She hugged me and smiled at me with that smile that always warms my own heart. I could tell she was trying to be close to me but it just didn't feel the same to me. I could sense she was trying and we never had to try, it just happened. I asked her if she wanted to go out to eat dinner and she said yes. When she went upstairs to change her clothes I checked the caller ID and sure enough there were two calls from Marty, one at noon and another at 2:30 p.m. I didn't know what to make of those calls, but I knew that she didn't meet him that afternoon.

The weekend was pretty uneventful, we did a few things together, and she wanted me to make love with her on a couple of occasions, but I just couldn't so I made up an excuse that I had a sore back. On Sunday night when I told her that I saw her shudder and saw a tear form again. I just couldn't bring myself to be intimate with her until I got to the bottom of this "supposed" affair.

On Monday I arranged to get a few hours off each afternoon that entire week so I could check up on Janet. I knew if something was really going on I would need to catch her. Nothing happened on Monday, but again there were three calls from Marty, nothing happened on Tuesday, two calls, nothing on Wednesday, no calls, but on Thursday at noon Janet called me and told me that since I would be golfing and eating at the club she was planning on going to the library to work on her thesis for the afternoon and evening and not to expect her home until around 8:30 p.m. or so. I think she was expecting me to tell her if I was not golfing. Well I wasn't going to golf, but I wasn't telling her that.

I drove over to Marty's house and parked out of the line of traffic so I could watch his house. I had my camera with the telephoto lens with me so I could take pictures if she showed up. At 2:00 p.m. Janet drove up and parked on the street outside his house. She got out and went up to the door and Marty opened it for her right away so she could hurry in. I sat there with my camera snapping pictures from the time she drove up until she walked in the door and it was shut. I could barely see through the viewfinder because of all the tears streaming out of my eyes, but I did take lots of pictures. Two hours later the door opened and out she came. Marty reached out and pulled her back to himself and kissed her. He was standing in his doorway in a t-shirt and a pair of boxers. She was clearly kissing him back and reached down and slipped her hand inside his boxers and was rubbing his cock. Eventually she broke off the kiss and I could see her pointing to her watch. I assumed she was planning on meeting him later as well. She hurried to her car and drove off. The entire time I was snapping picture after picture of the kiss, her hand in his boxers and her driving off with Marty standing in the doorway. I didn't need to see them actually having sex to know that they had. You don't spend two hours together, kiss like I saw them kiss and rub someone's cock like that unless you have been intimate. I knew it!

No one can imagine the hurt and disappointment and anger I had felt. My vision blurred, my head pounded, my stomach was in knots. I could feel my heart pounding like an air hammer breaking concrete. The feelings I had were overwhelming to me and I knew at that moment I was lost, my life was over. The one person in the whole world I loved and trusted and depended upon had betrayed me, had broken my trust and yes, had destroyed my manhood. I would never be able to forgive her. I would never be able to live with her again. I would never be able to live without her.

I reached under my car seat for my Glock 37 a 10 round 45 cal semiautomatic. I drove my car up in front of Marty's house, walked up to his front door, broke though it, and searched his house until I found him upstairs in his shower. I opened the shower door and leveled the gun at him. The shock on his face was unbelievable, I almost laughed at him.

I said, "Marty, you and those like you are the scum of the earth. Any man who would go after and fuck another man's wife doesn't deserve to live. You have destroyed a good marriage, you have destroyed a good woman, two good women actually including your own wife, you have destroyed me, and now I am going to destroy you."

I fired two rounds into his groin, two into his belly, two into his chest, and two into his head. Then I left him there and walked out.

I drove home and went into the house. I could hear that Janet was in the shower so I downloaded the pictures onto our computer. When she came downstairs, I was sitting in the family room waiting for her. She was surprised to see me and I could sense the fear in her. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

I told her that I had taken the afternoon off from golf again and that I had seen her arrive and leave Marty's house. I told her that I knew she was having an affair and I had pictures to prove it. I started a slide show of the pictures to run behind me as I talked to her. I asked her to explain to me why she did it. I asked her to explain to me why she didn't talk to me a week ago when I asked her what was wrong. I asked her to tell me what I had done to drive her into Marty's arms. I asked her to tell me how she could do that to me. I asked her how she could do that to our marriage. I asked her to tell me how she could do that to herself.

She just stood there, tears streaming down her face, moaning and shaking her head back and forth. I screamed, "Talk to me!" but no words came from her mouth, no explanation, nothing. She had nothing to say to me. The despair I felt at that moment was the worst yet.

I wanted to know so much, but she wouldn't tell me anything. She never said "I love you." She never said, "I am sorry." She never said a thing, just moaning and shaking her head.