Coming Clean

"It's ok Stanley," I smiled, "I'm just happy to know that I'm still attractive."

"Mrs. Mason," he said, "Now may I have those clothes?"

"You can if you really want," I said as I started to unbutton my blouse.

"Mrs. Mason," he said quickly, "This isn't appropriate."

"No it probably isn't," I said as I pulled my blouse off over my head, and unclasped my brazier quickly. "But," he said as he backed up.

"Stanley," I said aggressively as I approached him, "Are you a virgin?"

"Well I've never you know," he said nervously.

"Good," I said as I grasped the sheet around him, "Then your first time is as your friends might say, easy."

"I um," he said looking as if he might faint, "This isn't real is it?"

"Yes it is if you want me," I smiled as I put my hand on his, still holding the sheet tight, "Do you want me?"

"Well yes," he said quickly, "I mean...Oh Mrs. Mason."

"So come to my bed," I said as I took my hand and placed it on the front of the sheet in just the right place, "I want you to make love to me."

"Oh my," he said, looking flustered.

"Oh my indeed," I said as I wrapped my fingers around him through the sheet, "Come with me now."

"But what if...ho...ha whoa!" he stuttered as I pulled the sheet off of him and tossed it downward.

"Oh well I guess that answers it," I said as I looked down at his half erect prize.

"Well it just happened," he said as he watched me go to the kitchen door and lock it.

I went back over to him and took his hand, pulling him out of the kitchen. I held on as I also locked the family room door into the inner building hallway. I yanked his thin exposed body with me as I rushed to the bedroom. It seemed as if at this point he knew he had no choice. Or was it that he wanted it as much as I did. In all the years after I never asked him. I turned and pressed my body against him, kissing him passionately. He seemed to relax a bit, and I felt a nervous hand touch my back.

"Now, you need to relax," I said as I gently felt his exposed backside.

"Really? But that's kind of hard to do now," he said.

"Calm down and make it last. Understand?" I asked.

"Yes Ma'am I think so", he said nervously.

I realized that it looks like I planned this. I said all the right things like I had a mission to complete. Maybe it ended up that way, but it wasn't my intention. It was a sin under the watchful eyes of God and a betrayal of my husband, but I could not turn my feelings away. I was about to show him everything. I will be his teacher. He will learn from my experience. Then he will leave this house with the understanding of physical love, most likely with a large smile on his face. All those questions would be answered but it would leave me with one. Would he return again for more?

"You sweet young man," I said as I cupped his naked backside, "So pure. You're the clay in which I will mold."

"I don't know what I am doing Mrs. Mason," he said, "My mother..."

"Stop right there," I said as I scraped my fingers along the skin on his back, "I will teach it all to you. Just do what I show you. But rule number one...do not talk about your own mother when you are making love."

"Yes Mrs. Mason," he said, "Is this really going to happen? I mean, gosh. Is this really right?"

"No it isn't Stanley," I said as I looked at him, "But I want you in my bed. Unless you just say no and run out of here, I will have you there. You see, each of us have two choices, and each choice has a price tag."

"I didn't say I would tell you no, Mrs. Mason," he said trying to smile.

"Well I think I know you want it," I said feeling his erect feature pressing against my thighs.

"Can't help it," he said, "You are really lovely."

"Thank you," I said, "Just for that I will take special care of you."

"But...well I don't know what that means," he said.

"I will show you, but remember one thing," I smiled as I clenched his backside, "If you are about to reach the end, you have to tell me in plenty of time."

"The end?" he asked.

"I think you know what I mean," I smiled as I kissed him.

"Oh I um...heard about that yes," he said nervously.

"You're not a very good liar Stanley," I smiled. "Boys doing that on their own is part of growing up. Oh and just to answer a question I know you have, girls too."

"Well it's not something that we really talk about," he said.

"Well just hang on to it for me so this will last a while," I smiled.

He was not able to say another word. I had had enough talking. I turned him around with the grip that I had on him, and set him down on the bed. Getting a first real glimpse of his manhood at it's excited length, my eyes grew wide for a moment. I had a sudden thought and hoped that he would not get any larger. I wondered how I would handle it and the simple fact was that my husband could not compare. But that thought made me want it even more, despite the possible consequences.

After removing the remainder of my clothes, I dropped slowly to my knees in front of him and spread his legs apart. I was anxious to get my first touch. But I didn't want to build his excitement too quickly. I reached out and grasped him gently, feeling a slight throb of his youthful power. He flinched a bit, but when I started to move my hand up and down he relaxed, with a small smile on his face. I did not have much experience with what I was about to do. My husband would just enter me, and it would be over quickly, then he would fall asleep. I had only performed it once.

Lowering my head, I opened my mouth and lapped his scrotum from bottom to top, listening to a mild sigh from him, and another slight feeling of tension. I tickled him and felt the skin contract. Grasping the upper side of his shaft, I licked from the underside, all the way to the tip and over the head. Licking up and down, I heard him moan. I could feel his heat radiate through my tongue. It filled my body. I felt my own female natures well up as if to cry. I looked up into his eyes, and pressed my lips over his shaft. Moving my head up and down over him, he let out a much louder moan than before. I pushed him into my mouth as far as I could stand, and felt the strong pulse of his muscle. All I could manage was about halfway. I wasn't use to the thickness and length. Pulling out all the way, I licked the underside if it, then pressed my lips on him again. Even with my limited experience it had seemed so natural and I loved the feeling and texture of his soft, warm skin. I felt as if I could perform this action all afternoon.

"Wha...wait," he said pulling back a bit and grunted. "Oh my."

"Oh my sweet, you must like this," I said as I closed my eyes a moment and kissed his throbbing head.

"Oh Mrs. Mason," he panted as he watched me bathe him with kisses. "I was so close."

"Relax. Plenty of time for that later," I smiled as I cupped my lips on his shaft. "But I'm going to teach you how to return the pleasure."

"Oh anything you say Mrs. Mason," he said, "I...I saw that once in a magazine my friend showed me."

"I hope I don't have to remind you later not to tell this as a story to your friends," I smiled.

"No one would believe...oh Mrs. Oh my," he panted as I devoured him one last time before I put him into active duty."

I stood up and looked down at my young lover. His manhood stood proudly, but just for a moment I became unsure if I could handle it. It's long length made my insides quiver just looking at it. It wasn't just my mouth that was watering as a result. I walked over to the side of the bed and laid down beside him. He simply looked over at me, like we were pals sitting on a park bench. I decided to just get to the point.

"Touch my breasts, and suck on the nipples with your mouth," I said directly. "Explore what's in your mind right now."

"Ok Mrs. Mason," he said as he sat up.

He leaned over just a bit too eagerly and squeezed one of my breasts too hard. I pushed his hands off of me, and told him to be gentle. He wasn't making bread dough. His hands moved over my seemingly to explore and discover. It's true he learns quickly it seems. I closed my eyes, and felt wetness of lips pressed against my skin. As a reward, I reached my hand down and gently played with his man parts. I danced my fingers over his scrotum, wondering what power it would release later. His lips and tongue whirled around my protruding nipples, and his hands caressed my breasts. I moaned softly as we played. I could have let that go on for some time. It is the attention I love and don't get unless I do it myself in the shower. But even though I had done the deed and seduced him. I needed more.

"I would love it if you would work your way downward," I said.

"Alright," he said diligently.

"I know you can do it Stanley," I said.

As I taught my completely green around the ears young man the in and outs of oral pleasure, he listened so intently and did exactly what I told him to do. It was liberating just to have someone do something for me without question. That part of it is almost as good as the release. I keep thinking that he will make some lucky lady very happy with the jumpstart I am giving him. The truth is, he brought the woman out in me the first time in just a few short seconds. I had never had the experience before. It was the excitement.

With his soft lips and tongue licking and kissing my most personal place I simply let go of all my hesitations. It happened over and over so easily. It was yet another thing I had never experienced. I completely believed that he would stay there for hours if I did not take the next turn.

"Oh my sweet young man," I panted, "Stop now, and let's make love."

"I thought we were doing that Mrs. Mason," he said as he wiped his face, "Are we not?"

"Yes, your right," I smiled, "It's all part of it."

My young man had made me realize something. It was so obvious to me after that. So far in my life I had been taken to bed, entered for a few minutes, and felt the release and mild pleasure. But Stanley had made me know that there is a lot more to it than that.

Gently pushing him upward, I directed him to get into a common love making position. I had been so excited about doing this that I forgot about protection. I forgot about it completely. This would get me into trouble later. But as it turned out, it would not be a bad thing.

"No, up a little," I said as I felt his manhood brush around my wetness, "Ok just relax with it."

"Yes Ma'am," he answered as he tried his best.

"Oh gosh," I moaned as his warm head fumbled around.

Even the feeling of it just bobbing around and missing, excited me. As his soft, strong skin moved around I completely forgot about being safe. It was quite obvious that he didn't pay attention to the talk he had gotten once. I look at his determined face, almost as if he were working on something so very important. Then finally he got it right.

"Oh there it is Stanley," I said with a higher pitch as he entered me, "Oh there it is indeed."

For a brief moment I felt nervous as he stretched me further than ever before. But he also reached placed never before touched. It was all I needed to simply toss any inhibitions out the window. I looked in to his eyes and couldn't help seeing the slight smile he had managed. It had one message for me. One thing is clear about it now, and for him also. He understood what all the fuss was about. I directed him to go slowly at first. It is for my benefit, to get use to his girth. My own moans reached the highest octave I think I had ever achieved. His warmth could probably keep the coldest night away. I would find that out a few months from then. He had brought me to my limits so easily, and he was lasting. As he brought out the woman in me over and over and my insides contracted around him, with his size I felt as if I was strangling him. It was like an Ace bandage put on too tight. I felt so satisfied. Trying to hold back the joyful tears I felt coming, I quickly pulled away from him, to let him rest a bit. He laid down on his back.

"Oh my," he smiled as we kissed gently.

"So beautiful," I said with a whimper.

"Are you alright?" Stanley asked.

"Oh yes," I smiled.

"But shouldn't I have something to make it so that you do not have a child?" Stanley asked. "The doctor told me about that at my last exam, a few months ago. He told me what to do."

"Good, keep that knowledge with the next lady," I smiled. "I can't get pregnant for some reason. We have tried many times."

"Oh, I'm sorry about that," he said.

"It's the cards I was dealt," I said. "Now let's finish this."

I quickly sat up and mounted him. It caught me off guard a moment when of course I was able to have it deeper inside of me. But I felt so wonderful. Being on top of him made me feel liberated. I moan loudly as I move my hips around him. Faster and faster I rode as if I was on a fast moving horse. I never knew I could reach the end so many times, or even more than once for that matter.

"Oh!" I moaned and crashed on top of him.

I rested there as his hands found and fondled my breasts. His gentle fingers caressed me as if they had always been meant for that action. I was convinced that he had a gift for attention.

"Oh my," I panted frantically as I moved my hips.

I tried to get him further and further into me. My lust became so great that I began planning my next encounter with him if he would have me. I wondered if he would he let me take it further, and stronger like I had always wanted with my husband. Would he see the adventure in it and try all the things I can show him. I had gotten a taste of what this should be and would do just about anything to have it again.

"Mrs. Um," he grunted, "I can't hold."

"Then don't," I said as I flipped him around and wrapped my legs around him.

He grunted loudly. He seemed to get even larger for a moment, and the first of his warm wetness escaped into me. It was almost as if all the liquid in his body left him. The warmth closed my eyes for me as I felt his seed fill me. As soon as I could open my eyes and see the exhausted look on his face, I saw the complete satisfaction on his face. I couldn't help smiling at him. I wanted him to stay right there so I kissed him. But after several moments, he pulled away and rested beside me. For some reason I felt a strong compulsion and leaned over to kiss the tip of his lover maker gently. His taste did not repulse me like I thought it would.

We rested for a long time. I held on to him close in the bed and didn't move. He even briefly drifted off to sleep. I looked at him while he dozed, and thought of all the experiences I would teach him at other times. I smiled once before I woke him up, so we could clean up for the dinner hour.

At that time I did not know the overall joy and consequences of what I had done. There would be lust filled days and nights, guilty feelings, and a very special secret gift. I think with all of the things that happened that were so mixed and the fact that my mind is now failing me, I needed to write this down. I will read or browse through it from time to time, then either burn it in the fireplace when my days are running out, or leave it so that someone knows the truth.

Even though it is now the year 1989, I still remember those feelings so well. I remember also the many times that came afterward. The experience was so very intense. Each time we got together, it was the same high we both experienced. It happened regularly for over 4 years. We learned from each other. We even almost got caught. We lost track of time once and finished up, just seconds before I heard my husband pay the taxi right outside the window. He never knew that as he hugged me hello, that I had Stanley's essence inside me. I loved my husband but he never found out. Even with all my sins, I could never break his heart like that. Anyone reading this can think all of the bad thoughts they want about me. No one will find it until I am gone, if ever. There was an even darker secret that no one knew. It was barely two months after this first encounter, and after several more that I discovered I had become pregnant. I cried with joy, to the point of a wail. I had always wanted that. But it suddenly occurred to me whose child it really was. Because it had happened so easily with Stanley it occurred to me that it was my husband that could not produce. I cared for Stanley's child until adulthood without telling either one of them. My husband went to his grave thinking she was his child, and he loved her dearly. I could never tell Stanley of his daughter either. So the reader of this if there is one, may see a harlet with two dark secrets. For he had married six years later and had a boy of his own. It would ruin his marriage if his wife found out. But he gave me such a precious gift all those decades ago.

People should understand the power that lust and loneliness can have over a person.

Sitting on the edge of an antique bed in 2013, a young woman named Kailee closes the cover of a diary with only a single long entry she had just read. She had found it at the bottom of a box in her mother's closet. They had been cleaning out the old house for a few days now. But this small book had been the most memorable. In fact, she would never forget it.

"Hey there you are," her husband said from the bedroom doorway. "Is that something of your Mom's?"

"No," Sally said softly, "My grandmother."

"Oh, good reading?" he asked.

"I'm not sure," she sighed, "I'll be down in a minute."

"Ok," her husband said as he walked away.

Kailee looked down at the cover of the diary. She slowly set it down on the end table and sat quietly on the edge of her mother's bed. Sighing deeply she began to think, and suddenly remembered something her grandmother had said to her once after her long battle with dementia had begun. She mentioned once that there were two loves in her life. Kailee didn't know what she meant until this moment. She didn't know what she really thought about the diary and wondered even more why her grandmother found it necessary to write it. Had her mother read it, and learned who her biological father was? She wondered if it was some way of atonement or confession. This diary seemed to be a way to come clean. But there was one other strong feeling in her mind. It was so clear, and the most profound she had had in a long time. She stood quickly as she went to find her husband.