Counseling Ch. 01

"You won't. Don't you remember Jason Beghe? You think Miscavige wants thirty-two potential Jason Beghes walking around?"

"Time out!" Alicia said. "You have six or seven actors named Jason in Scientology. Who's this one again?"

"The one who quit Scientology earlier this year," Erika answered. "TMZ calls him our 'celebrity whistleblower'. He hasn't worked much in Hollywood since he left our church and started defaming it along with the other critics. Before you ask, as far as I know Scientology isn't creating his lack of employment. It's more that no one trusts Beghe anymore, inside or outside his former religion. That's what my non-Scientologist agent tells me."

"Oh." Alicia nodded. "I know this man now. Dane, Erika has a point."

"Getting out of Scientology is worth our careers, Erika. Our church is messed up. I know it firsthand now. Wait till you find out what Jessica made me do."

"I already have an idea, Dane," Erika replied. "She got you to shun our family, didn't she? That's why you haven't talked to me since you met her."

"Yeah. I've been erasing your messages as soon as I heard your voice. You also know about those rumors I put out, right? Jessica had me working Fair Game on Evan. I told some TMZ reporters that she broke up with her boyfriend because she was dating another man who was a violent psychopath. Have you heard of Mickey Rourke?"

"Good actor," Erika said. "However, he enjoys being offensive before the press and he has a drinking problem. TMZ broadcasts his faults along with every other celebrity's. Any reason for him in particular?"

"Evan did a movie with him and they're pals. Jessica told me that Rourke called Tom Cruise names on television during the 'South Park' event we discussed, backing up the gossip against Scientology. She wanted him targeted specifically for that. I also put out this other rumor that Ira was living with Evan and her boyfriend. They had a rent dispute and You-Know-Who kicked Ira out. It wasn't true, though. I made it all up."

"Oh my God, Dane," Erika said, recognizing the report. "You're TMZ's inside source on Evan's split with Manson?"

"Yes. Alicia, if you didn't know, Evan was living with the Satanist shock-rocker Marilyn Manson."

"I do know. Were you calling him 'You-Know-Who' before?"

"I call Manson that because I don't like to say his name. It gives him power. I guess I'll drop it. Jessica tried to convert Manson to Scientology after I targeted Evan and Evan rejected my advances. Jessica had me doing all those rumors and she approached Manson and Evan but they warned her off. Then Evan called me and told me she never wanted to see me again unless I ditched Jessica. Evan had put together what was going on. I fired Jessica this afternoon after I thought about what Evan told me. I'm also quitting Scientology."

"Dane, you can't do that," Erika said. "Jessica was acting on her own. She had to have been. What about all the church has done for you? You were telling me how it got you to overcome your problems."

"Right, then Jessica undid everything. I met her the day I got out of the RPF, Erika — October 27th. I was ready for my final RPF audit and all my usual ministers were busy. I met Jessica in a church garden while I was waiting for someone else. She was commanding this black bird of prey. It was like a hawk or an eagle but smaller and flew very fast."

"A peregrine falcon?" Alicia asked.

"That was it. Jessica had the bird under her power. I was bedazzled. She instructed and it obeyed. I asked how she was making the bird fly around and retrieve things and Jessica told me she was projecting her will into her pet as Scientology had taught her. I never saw anything like it before."

"Dane, that wasn't special abilities," Erika insisted. "That side of Scientology is all metaphorical 'unlock your potential' stuff. Jessica had to have been fibbing. Right, Alicia?"

Alicia nodded. "It sounds like she's a falconer. Falconry, or hunting with trained falcons, is a sport that was popular in medieval Europe. Today it's not practiced as much."

"I didn't know that till just now," said Dane. "Seeing Jessica with the bird and hearing her voice put me under her spell. You're right, Erika, she knows our scripture better than anyone. She became my auditor. When I wasn't stocking shelves at Safeway, I worked at the church with Jessica. I let her guide my life and did everything she told me. Ira decided to move out of our apartment and I let him when Jessica took his side. I quit my grocery job on her advice too. Jessica wanted me to work for Scientology exclusively and I complied. It wasn't until after Evan yelled at me that I was able to break away from her."

"Are you really free, Dane?" Erika inquired, suspicious. "Please don't tell me she's there with you right now."

"Of course not, Erika. I would never lie to you!"

"He isn't lying, is he, Alicia?"

Alicia frowned, applying her "Law & Order" detective's instincts. "I don't think so."

Erika smiled, relieved. "Dane, why didn't you come to me about this before?"

"I was scared of Jessica, Erika. She told me no one in our family is a good Scientologist."

"Well, who is she to determine that?"

"I told her all about you, Erika — the college you were attending, your swinging, the Friendship, everything. I told her about the rest of our family also. No auditor had ever seen a problem in our family before but Jessica did. She laughed for a long time when she heard about you studying psychology and then said she wasn't surprised. Jessica told me to disconnect from you. That's our term for shunning, Alicia — disconnection. I only changed my mind about Jessica's advice this morning."

Erika put a hand to her mouth. "Did you tell her I graduated? About my new practice?"

"No. What practice?"

"I finished college two weeks ago, Dane. I got my psychology certificate and bachelor's degree on Veterans' Day. I've been seeing lots of clients, including celebrities. I keep it confidential except from those I can trust."

"Oh. Congratulations. I must have deleted that message."

"Good. Maybe I can still salvage this. I want people to know about my degree and what I do, just not the wrong people. What about our reform movement? Did you tell Jessica about that?"

"Only a little. I didn't want to give her names. I heard Jessica mock you and I got worried. I started trying to lead her on, separate myself from her. Then this thing with Evan happened. I followed Jessica's guidance. It seemed good in the beginning, you know?"

"Right, Dane. Then it messed things up."

"Exactly. Those bullies you mentioned were part of it too. They're Jessica's sidekicks. They follow her orders almost as well as the falcon."

"You said they were after Manson and Evan?"

"Yes. Jessica wanted to create a situation where they'd join Scientology with my help. It didn't work and Evan got mad at me. When I fired Jessica this afternoon, I told her I planned to exit the church. She said 'go ahead, the little whore will still love you'. That's what she called you, Erika, 'little whore'. I think she knows you even if you don't know her."

Erika shrugged. "I don't know how Jessica would know me. I only really know about her through Mike, gossip and her sister."

"Sister?"

"Melissa Feshbach Prynne, the Scientology reverend I call 'Sweet Melissa' after the Allman Brothers song? I'm not the only one who calls her that."

"Yeah, you've told me about Melissa being your auditor. I haven't ever met her, though."

"I was introduced to her in 2003 and have worked with her since. Mike saw I didn't have a regular auditor and suggested Melissa. She's a war widow and an OSA agent like Jessica. She's also very skilled at auditing, but she's caring and clever. There are many people like her in Scientology if you know where to look."

"You said she's Jessica's sister?"

"They're identical twins, same as you and Brando. I've heard you can tell them apart by their opposing demeanors. Melissa's positive and Jessica's negative."

"Like Brando's responsible and I'm me."

"Yeah, Dane," Erika said with a giggle. "You're the evil twin."

"Stop that," Dane answered after laughing along. "Being my big sister doesn't give you the right to tease me. You're accurate, though. Jessica is evil. I had to get rid of her once I saw that. Why don't you want me to quit Scientology?"

"Because, Dane, if you do, Jessica wins. That's what she wants. I need you in my reformers. If you leave, you'll be just like Beghe — outside and cut off from us. You recall when we watched that interview he did on why he left? Remember how he was talking about the way Scientology fucked him up and destroyed his identity? You know that isn't the case for everyone. It wasn't for you, me, or several other people I could name. I tried going to Beghe before he exited and telling him all this, inviting him into our reformers. He laughed in my face and said our cause was doomed, that he wouldn't even dignify it with a mention to the outside. He was too angry and wrapped up in his own mindset. Now Beghe's out there making people think his experience is universal when it's not. Do you think I want that happening with you?"

"Erika, I must do this."

"Dane, you can't. You'll also be the same as those writers who agreed with the online bashers that Isaac was a hypocrite if you do it. They forgot all the good will Isaac showed them and named all Scientologists as bad. I reminded Isaac of what our church does for human rights and that there were some of us who lived without the bad stuff. That's why he stayed inside even after what happened with 'South Park'. He died in August of a second stroke, as you know, but even until death, he never spoke out against Scientology. If you want to do different, you can go ahead. I won't like it, though. Mom and Dad won't either, even if we're not going to shun you."

"Erika, I'm really upset. I have to leave."

"No, you do not. Listen to me. I can smooth things over. Melissa and Jessica have been competing for auditing cases since they started their training. People would have trouble telling them apart and send one's audit to the other. They had to be separated. Since Jessica's foul-ups started happening, Melissa's dedicated herself to undoing her sister's damage. Mike is helping her and so am I."

"Melissa's a reformer?"

"Yes. She encourages people towards human rights advocacy, disaster relief and the other good work Scientology does. I'm among her celebrity audit cases and so are Jenna and Kirstie Alley. Melissa has gotten over a hundred people into our movement, Kirstie included. She's working on Jenna right now, though it's taking time because Jenna has an ego and can only see Scientology's good side. We haven't yet revealed our cause to her but Melissa's ready when the time is right. I never really wanted an auditor before Melissa. Now I know her and she's really helped me. Do you recall the church I opened in Plant City, Florida last year?"

"Was that where you got ticked off and declared to the opening day crowds that all classes taken at the church should be charged to your account?"

"That's the place," Erika confirmed, smiling as she remembered the faces of her religion's moneychangers when she defied them. "I don't know what got into me. I just got through telling all these people they would find a great outlet for family values in our faith and then the ministers lined up the cash registers. I guess I freaked."

Dane snickered. "I heard you turned over desks and whipped people."

"Not true. I didn't freak quite that much. Melissa helped me get out of what I did. She told the Chairman I did not have a psychotic episode and that my supporting Plant City could be a great boon for Scientology. Some celebrities already sponsor specific parishioners. I was going to do an entire church."

"Wouldn't that put you in debt?" Alicia asked. "I never knew about this, Erika."

"I'm not in debt. Plant City is just one church in a small town and our religion is unpopular right now thanks to our critics. Also, it only takes one person to start a trend. My Scientologist friends have been helping me. We have to keep it hidden, though, just like our reform movement. The Chairman called me into his office a week after I spoke up in Plant City. He told me he didn't want other celebrities to follow my lead and parishioners to start expecting sponsorship and freeloading on courses. Mike had already resigned over the scandal so I wouldn't be punished and it was taking all Miscavige could do to stop things from leaking to the press. If not for Mike and Melissa's advocacy, I might have had to leave Scientology back then."

"Where's Mike now?"

"He's outside our church and living alone in Virginia. He still has influence, but his time as OSA director is over. For the past fourteen months, Miscavige has controlled OSA himself. I still support Plant City because the entire church staff is reformist clergy. They know why I did what I did and they agree with it. They're quietly reimbursing Scientologists for their courses with my money. Miscavige is disappointed with me but he's willing to let it slide. He said he would let me continue my work in Plant City as long as no one actively copied me elsewhere. No one has yet. They're all afraid of the Chairman. I understand even though I wish they weren't."

"Why don't you tell the Chairman about your reform movement?"

"I can't. He may see it as a threat, even though we're not bad Scientologists and we all want to stay inside. You've probably heard the controversies on the web about Miscavige. He was our founder's chosen successor and took over Scientology in the early 1980s. Ron couldn't get Mary Sue to officially resign her position but Miscavige did. Then Ron died in 1986 and the Chairman was firmly in charge of Scientology. He spread our church further around the world and got us tax exemption in America but he also increased the protests. He's tried to hold us together through almost thirty years of contraction and expansion. There's a lot of weight on Miscavige. It never stops."

"Didn't he expel some of his own family members from Scientology when they weren't devout enough for him? I've seen their critical website."

"They left on their own, Alicia. Miscavige was ready to help them remain but they weren't interested. I've gotten to know the Chairman from our brief meetings at church events and asked him about his family. Miscavige told me he didn't like to see them go. He's the same as Mike or Melissa at heart. He wants to save our religion and see it continue. Miscavige has a paranoid streak but he also has a good side. I think he's the best person in charge for the present. I'm worried about him, however. He's a practical person in an unstable situation. Miscavige wants to keep the fanatics in check and Scientology strong, even in our current climate. If my movement were in the open, he might not be able to do that."

"Better him in power than someone like Jessica," Dane agreed. "Erika, what am I going to do here? I've really screwed up."

"It's not that bad. You haven't slept with Jessica or anything like that, right?"

"I was hoping to for a while. Then she turned me off when I saw her smacking around her minions. I did not want her after that. I do owe her two hundred and forty dollars, though."

Goddamn Jessica for treating Dane like this! Erika cursed to herself. There is no excuse! She rolled her eyes at Alicia. Her girlfriend rolled her own eyes in accord and Erika turned back to the phone.

"Okay, Dane," Erika said after a minute of thought, "the family needs to have a sit-down with you. Melissa should be there. She's an expert at helping people avoid having to leave Scientology. As I told you, she assisted me. I'm one of many she's aided. I haven't introduced you to her before because I didn't think you needed her. Now I know otherwise. Dane, I have been where you are right now a dozen times. Melissa has pulled me back every one. She reminds me there are good people all over Scientology, even in our clergy. She's the best one of us I can name."

"Where is she? I know she's not in L.A. or Florida."

"Melissa's in St. Louis. She's an OSA deputy director and supervises church operations in the entire Midwestern United States. I communicate with her by phone, e-mail and the occasional visit, just as I do other long distance friends. Melissa's one of the few Feshbachs who's done well for themselves and rightly so. Look, Dane, I'll call Mom and Dad, then get dressed and come over there with them to see you. They'll take you to visit Melissa and get you some help. I'll come to St. Louis myself after this weekend when my schedule is clear of other clients. No whining about this. I'm not letting you just up and leave. If I have to be my brother's keeper, I will."

"Okay, Erika, fine. I was wavering anyway. I'm still departing Scientology if this goes sour, though."

"That's your right. I just want you to give this a chance. It will all be fine. Stay calm. I'll talk to my fellow reformers and make sure everyone knows what happened to you. Jessica's a danger we've been ignoring. We need to be certain she's not inclined to hurt you further. I'll also get a complaint report sent to the Chairman. As far as he knows, our family is still a great bunch of Scientologists and there's no cause for you to disconnect from us like you have. Maybe Melissa and I can catch Miscavige on a good day and get him to censor Jessica again, seriously this time."

"I hope so. Erika, I'm really sorry. I need you to do something else for me."

"Spill it."

"You have to talk to Evan. She's with the wrong guy. Yeah, they broke up, but what if they get back together? Evan can't get hurt anymore. She's not involved with anyone like Jessica, but she's still in danger. You-Know-Who is a maniac. Can you pull her out?"

Erika exhaled her frustration. "I don't know, Dane. You pretty much ruined things for me before I could even step in. What if Evan thinks I'm another Jessica stooge?"

"Damn it, I didn't think of that! I was just trying to get back at Evan for hurting me. It was what Jessica told me to do."

"Now she's gone. Are you going to do it still?"

"No, Erika, but what if Evan hates us? We can't let that happen."

"I'll work on it," Erika assured her brother. An idea came to her. "I can't help Evan myself immediately, but I know someone who could." Thank goodness Doug doesn't mind me disturbing him at all hours, she thought. "Look, you stay home till Mom and Dad get there. I'll be just behind them with Alicia, Nick and Brando. Don't open the door for anyone but us."

"I won't. Thank you, Erika."

"You're welcome. Be careful, Dane. I love you." Erika terminated the connection and exhaled, looking at Alicia. There would be no dildo session for them now, not for a while at least. "Dane's okay, but we need to finally get off our butts and help him and Evan."

"So I gathered," Alicia said. "Who are we gonna call?"

Erika's response was one word. "Frost-Fire." Grinning at the other naked woman sitting beside her, she began dialing her phone.

To Be Continued...