Crossing the Line

Me: Hi there. No fair wearing heels. You'll make us shorties look even shorter. :P

There, that should get a chuckle I thought. I was on one of those fetish sites and had just come across a rather attractive domme. Most of the people on here open with some stupid one liner or cheesy pick up line. I always tried to be a bit more creative than that. Sometimes I would offer to write a story for them or I'd make a joke or something like that. Something that set me apart from all the horny idiots on there. Like with this one, I noticed her profile said she was 6 foot tall and in her profile pictures she was wearing heels. I figured she'd get a chuckle and then she'd be more likely to respond.

Miss2Good4U: don't feel bad about being short...it's the back fat that's embarrassing

Me: :( It's not that bad is it?

Miss2Good4U: Looks it from that pic... Show me some more, and tell me height, weight, tit size, and dress size

I attached a couple more pictures to the message. Nothing too sexy or revealing. In fact they were all pictures I had posted on my Facebook page.

Me: 5'2 tall

Me: 125 lbs

Me: 32 B

Me: Size 6

Miss2Good4U: Are you home?

Me: Yes

Miss2Good4U: Tell me what you are wearing head to toe. Be specific

Me: I'm wearing a black shirt. Loose fitting jeans. Grey panties. White socks and black tennis shoes

Miss2Good4U: OK. I want to see your stomach... don't strip, I wouldn't ask for that, we just started talking. Lift the shirt up but to not exposed your tits... then take a pic...if you want to impress me you can show me your legs without the jeans so I can judge if you have thunder thighs as well

Yeah right bitch. No way am I gonna send you something like that. I don't send pictures to anyone and I'm certainly not going to start with this rude bitch

Me: :( But you're just gonna make fun of me. I know I need to lose some weight. You don't need to rub it in :(

Miss2Good4U: Do it, you know you need to be exposed

Sure I mean it might be fun. I'd certainly get a rush out of it but I'm not gonna do it. If I give in here she'll demand more and more pics and when I refuse she'll have all she needs to blackmail me. I'm not gonna let myself fall for that one.

Me: Isn't it enough that you've made me feel bad about myself :( Please don't try to make me do that

Miss2Good4U: Do it! We both know you want to

Miss2Good4U: Not a bad story by the way

I actually had several stories attached to my profile so getting feedback and compliments was nothing new. Most people when they tried to get to me tried reading and talking about them with me.

Me:  No

Me: Thanks. Which one? The latest one about Goddess and Miss Jasmine? I've gotten very mixed reviews about that one so I'm really glad you like it

Miss2Good4U: Bye. It was a simple request...

Miss2Good4U: I would have enjoyed reading your captions. Too bad

Ha that bitch just slipped up. I'll send her the link to my captioned work instead of sending her the pictures of me she wanted

Me: Here's the link to the captions. Sorry I disappointed you

Me: http://www.[redacted]

Miss2Good4U: We could have had a ton of fun, but you blew it... now you will never get to hear my critique of your work

What?!? That bitch. Sending her the captions link was supposed to make up for not sending self-pictures

Me: Aww please. I want to know what you think. I know you're disappointed in me but I'm just too much of a wimp to do something like that. Won't you enjoy humiliating me by telling me everything I did wrong with my stories/captions?

Miss2Good4U: Nope. Not until I see you like I said...just do it...you are already getting wet. Quit fighting it

Me: Please don't. I've never sent a pictures like that to anyone. If I send them to you other people will want to see me like that. Please don't make me do that

Miss2Good4U: Do it. I specifically made it non nude to make it easier!

Me: Please. I can't

Miss2Good4U: Go on flabbykat

Flabbykat? What kind of insult is that? I mean sure I get the point that she's calling me flabby and my username has kat in is but overall it's a pretty weak insult.

Me: Please Miss I can't do that. It's a line I've never crossed despite being on this site for over a year. I want to keep talking to you and I want to hear your critiques of my work but I will not send you pictures like that humiliating myself

Miss2Good4U: Nope

Oh come on bitch, I know full well you'd love it. You gotta learn to compromise here. That's how D/s relationships work.

Me: Then I guess this is goodbye. That's a line I'm not willing to cross. Even though I really want to keep talking I won't cross it so I guess you're done with me

I hated it. I hated myself for it but I couldn't forget it. I'd been going online in fetish blogs like that for over a year and no one had ever convinced me to send a picture. The whole idea was insulting to me as I knew the second I sent one they'd demand more. That's why I'd made it a policy in the first place. Sure I'd talked to dommes before who asked for pictures. Some of them I'd been talking to for weeks and would have been OK sending them something a little sexier but I knew if I crossed the line for one of them I'd cross it again for someone else and eventually my naked pictures would be all over the internet. So I never sent them. Not one. Nothing that I wouldn't post on Facebook anyway.

Sooner or later pretty much everyone asked to see more of me. Most of the guys I met online that was the first thing they asked. Before asking how I was or what I was looking for they would ask to see me naked and become offended when I refused as if I were the one being unreasonable. The women were usually better and would take the time to talk before asking for pictures like that. But sooner or later they'd ask and I'd tell them no. The polite ones would say they understood and we'd keep talking but once they knew they wouldn't see me naked they quickly lost interest and moved on to other girls. The rude ones would just never respond after I told them no.

And it's not like she was the first one to make fun of me for being fat either. I know full well that I'm a little over weight and could lose a few pounds but 15 pounds or so does not make me fat does it? Most of the people who liked to make fun of me was a one and done sort of thing. They'd send me one message calling me fat or piggy or something like that and then never message me again. I certainly didn't like it but I never minded that much. After all I grew up in the golden age of the internet so I was used to trolls.

But for some reason this girl's comments got to me and I couldn't get them out of my mind. I like humiliation and I often got off on it but it was usually a brief thing. I'd masturbate when someone called me a dirty whore and by the time I put my pants back on I'd forgotten all about whoever I was talking to and what they said. But this one I couldn't forget. She was in my head.

I had a fantastic orgasm that night thinking about her and what she said to me. It wasn't just calling me fat either. I had dozens of original stories and captioned pictures online and usually got praised for how good they were. Most of the criticisms came from grammar Nazis and I just ignored those. I couldn't shake the feeling that if our conversation continued she would have ripped them apart and destroyed them. I could only imagine the types of comments she'd make and none of them were good. That's what really set me over the edge and I passed out in my own juices.

I never expected to still care when I woke up. I'd never given a domme this much thought after talking to her so little. But she was still on my mind when I got out of bed and took my shower the next day. Not only that but she was still in there enough that I masturbated in the shower to her memory. Normally an encounter like that would get me off once but then I'd be bored. She was something special I could tell. But of course I wouldn't be messaging her again. Too bad really. If she could just get over this petty need to see me like that we could have had a lot of fun.

Oh well. I did my best to put it out of my mind as I got dressed for my shift at work. Luckily this was my short day and I only had a couple hours during the lunch rush. After that I would run a few errands and then end my day at the gym. I was never super strict but I tried to go when I had the time and that domme had inspired me to go a little extra hard today.

Work went more or less as usual. The lunch rush was so busy I didn't even have time to think about what the domme had said the night before. It wasn't until the end of my shift when we were splitting the lunch tips that I started thinking about her again. I don't even know what brought her to mind. One minute I was thinking about whether I should go to the mall or Walmart and the next I'm thinking about how much that domme would make fun of me if she came in and I had to waitress for her. I could only imagine the complaints she would have. I didn't doubt that she'd demand to see the manager and degrade and insult me to him or that to make her happy he'd berate me in front of her.

The thought got me so wet I was afraid I'd soak right through my panties and leave a wet spot on my pants. I wanted to run to the bathroom to get off again but stopped myself. After all I'd already cum to the thought of this woman twice. If it continued I'd be letting her have power over me and I didn't want that.

So instead I walked out to my car and started driving to the store. Eventually I calmed down and I was able to focus as I bought the essentials to get me through the next week minus anything that needed to be refrigerated. I knew I was going to the gym before I went home so any milk would sour. I could always pick up the last few things after my workout.

I got to the gym and went straight to the locker room to get changed out of my work uniform and into my workout clothes. As I stripped down I realized just how wet I'd gotten thinking about that domme. My panties were soaked and I hadn't even started sweating yet. I change into my sports bra and spandex shorts and shoved my bag and clothes into a locker.

She should really be a trainer or something I thought an hour and a half later. It'd been one of the best workouts of my life. I was sweaty and completely drained. I knew I was going to be really sore in the morning but luckily I didn't have work the next day. As I walked to the locker room I couldn't wait to get home and take a nap.

I pulled off my sweaty clothes and left them on the bench as I made my way naked to the shower. Normally I have a bit more modesty than that but I was so horny and exhausted at the same time that I just didn't care anymore. It's a weird feeling not caring if strangers see you naked. Kind of scary but liberating at the same time.

I showered in the cold water without a care in the world and only got out when I started to shiver. I know that probably wasn't good for my muscles but it felt so relaxing to cool off like that. I dried off and walked back to my locker wrapped in my towel.

All along the wall in the locker room was a huge mirror. Normally I thought it was a little weird as it let people spy on each other naked but for once I decided to use it. I dropped my towel and began inspecting my body in the mirror. I cupped my small breasts and pushed them up and together trying to give myself better cleavage. I took a good long look at my belly and couldn't help but admit that I really needed to start losing the extra weight if I wanted to look good for the next bikini season. Then I turned around and started inspecting the back. It was true I had a little back fat but it was nowhere near as bad as she had tried to make it seem. My ass on the other hand needed work. I knew there were hundreds of squats in my future if I wanted to improve on it but for the first time in a long time I was ready to commit to working out and looking better.

Suddenly I heard a giggle and looked around to find a woman checking me out in the mirror and giggling. I realized I must look ridiculous checking myself out like that in a public locker room and blushed deeply. I quickly opened my locker and started to get dressed. I stopped when I grabbed my panties though...they'd dried while I was in the gym but now there were some fairly obvious stains on the fabric. I wasn't sure I wanted to put the dirty panties on and instead decided to go commando. I finished getting dressed and shoved my towel and workout clothes into my bag along with my dirty panties and got ready to leave.

On a whim just before I started to leave I decided to leave my dirty panties on the bench for someone to find. Who knows maybe even the woman who'd laughed at me in there would be the one to find them...

I went to my car and finished my errands on my way home. By the time I got home the deep ache from my workout was really starting to set in and carrying my groceries inside was practically torture. I collapsed on my couch to watch some TV but instead I decided to pull out my laptop and check the fetish site again. I tried to tell myself I was just checking to see if anyone new had messaged me but the truth was I was really hoping Miss2Good4U had reconsidered and had messaged me.

I had a few new messages but they were all lame one sentence openers. Nothing even worth responding to. I decided to click on Miss2Good4U's profile just to see if she was online and found that she was. OK I thought now I just wait online and she'll notice I'm on here and she'll realize she wants to talk to me. She may hold out for a little while to save face but eventually she'll crack and admit she was being unreasonable...

I kept the tab open but opened others so I could while away the time online while I waited for her to see reason. I went through all of Facebook and all the other sites I normally visit to keep myself occupied before I finally clicked back to the fetish site. I'd given her almost an hour and thought surely she'd have come around by then.

Bitch! I thought. I know she sees that I'm online. Why hasn't she messaged me yet? Is she really gonna be that petty? It's not like I'm gonna cave and send her pictures. I'm definitely never gonna do that. If that's what she's waiting for she's gonna be waiting forever.

Suddenly I couldn't help but imagine what the picture would look like if I did ever take one. How would I pose? What would I wear? I would never send her a picture but I'd absolutely never send her a nude so what kind of underwear would I wear? Something sexy? Or should I try something more casual to try to make it seem like it wasn't a big deal? Like I didn't care about her or that I was sending her pictures.

Once that line of thought got in my head I couldn't stop thinking about it. I decided I needed to distract myself or else I'd go crazy waiting for her to message me. So I retreated to my room but left the tab open so she would still think I was online. I went through my underwear drawer trying to decide what I would wear if I were to take a picture like that. Not that I had any intention to take such a picture but it was just sort of a thought exercise.

I spent over an hour going through every single pair of underwear and bikini I had and weighing all the pros and cons of each of them. I actually went so far as to try about half of them on and check myself in the mirror from every angle. It was weird, I'd never put nearly this much effort to choosing underwear for a date before. It was actually pretty fun thinking about and trying to figure out what the best thing to wear would be.

Periodically I kept going back to my laptop and checking to see if she'd messaged me but all I got were a few desperate one liners from desperate loser guys. I was a little disappointed but it gave me more time to pick my undies.

I managed to narrow it down to three options; one casual, one sexy, and one bikini. I still couldn't decide whether I wanted to be casual or sexy...not that I was serious about showing them to anyone anyway.

This whole thing was starting to drive me crazy. I decided that maybe I should just take the stupid picture to see which looked best. I still wasn't going to show the pictures to anyone, it was just for my own piece of mind. I figured once I took the pictures and looked at them I'd know which looked the best and at least my mind would be at ease.

I started casual with a simple pair of gray boy shorts. I walked to my mirror and held up my shirt with one hand and took the picture with the other. I took a couple from slightly different angles and then a few more from the back. I took a good long look at them and had to admit that Miss2Good4U had a point...I really did need to lose some weight. I didn't think it was too bad in the front but I could tell my ass and thighs had suffered a lot form my weight gain since going to college.

Next I decided I'd go for a bikini and grabbed a hot pink pair of bottoms. They were bright and I thought they might distract a little bit and since it was just a bikini it's not like it'd be too embarrassing I someone were to see the picture. Not that I was going to let anyone see them or anything like that.

It worked a little bit. One the one hand the bright color distracted a little bit from my extra padding but it also showed a little bit more skin. Especially in the back. Overall I think the casual look was better. But I didn't delete the pictures either.

Finally I changed into my sexy panties. I'd picked out a cheeky pair of black lace that I normally saved for special dates. They were my favorite pair of panties and always made me feel super sexy. I was pretty sure they'd be the best...

Looking at the pictures was devastating for me. I'd always thought of myself as beautiful in that pair but looking at the pictures I realized I'd been kidding myself. Don't get me wrong I was still cute and certainly not ugly but I wasn't stunning either. The thin lacy material barely hid anything and all my flaws were bare to the world.

Dressed in my sexy panties and a t shirt I went back to my laptop to try to cheer myself up with funny internet videos. I never got that far; when I sat down I just stared at the website. I was transfixed. I wanted desperately to hear from Miss2Good4U. I wanted her to validate me. Or at the very least I wanted her to criticize me. Even that would be better than ignoring me like this.

Finally I just couldn't take it and I messaged her

Me: Hi. Could we talk?

I still wasn't going to give her the pictures I took but I thought maybe I could convince her to talk some other way. I'm pretty clever so maybe I could trick her into it. I waited and waited. I saw that she'd seen my message and read it but she didn't respond.

Me: Please Miss2Good4U. I'll do anything you want other than send you pictures. We can go on Skype or talk on the phone or anything else...