Deconstructing the Nerd Ch. 07

Chapter VII

Reema felt better the next morning. She bounced out of bed, stripped off her nightwear, and began her day. After eyeing the wardrobe she'd picked out the night before, she impulsively scrapped everything and started over, coordinating a new outfit.

First she squeezed into a slim pair of jeans. Then she added a thin, white sweater with a rounded, slightly plunging neckline. Brushing her hair in front of the mirror, she admired her reflection. On most days, she wore a low-maintenance ponytail, but today she opted to do more. She combed out her tresses a bit more, then adjusted them so they cascaded down her back. She put on a little more makeup than usual for class. Nothing too excessive. For footwear, she chose a pristine pair of white Adidas shoes. Confident with her choices, she snapped a picture for Instagram and added the playful hashtag "#dressingitup".

Glancing at her textbook, Reema considered that Cassie probably wouldn't even bring books today. But Cassie did things her way, and Reema had habits of her own. Smiling, she slipped the 400-page tome into her recently-purchased handbag. It had enough space to fit her laptop, binders and a couple of books. A sleek white and black tote, it was just as useful as her purple JanSport -- but cuter.

Fully prepared for the day, Reema bounced out her door. She hadn't done the assigned reading yet, so planned on skimming it over before class.

Cassie got to the lecture in the midst of Reema's book-skimming. The Indian girl immediately shut her text and resumed catching up with her blonde friend. It did strike Reema as funny: they were studying journalism, but Cassie was like a human newspaper personified... or maybe more like a gossip magazine. As the lecture progressed, the girls kept texting each other with inside jokes and funny productions on SnapChat. Unbeknownst to Reema, she and Cassie had started developing a reputation among their classmates, based on their eye-catching clothing and boisterous, distracting behaviour.

During a break, they whipped over to Starbucks for a mid-morning coffee. Reema's mornings before venturing off to class were a bit different nowadays. Whereas before she ensured to allot herself enough time to eat a full meal, Reema now mainly spent the time styling herself, foregoing a bite until she reached campus. When she thought about it, she was doing more and more of this primping lately.

Cassie ordered for both of them -- a vanilla latte with no whip for her brown friend, and a tall no-fat pumpkin latte for herself.

The barista nodded, "Your names...?"

"Cassie and Ree," she replied. Adding two last-minute fruit parfaits to the order, she tapped her meal card.

The girls waited on their drinks at the end of the bar. Reema idly mentioned her recent manicure. "My nails still look amazing, by the way."

"That's what happens when you go to a great salon!" Cassie said, wondering how the other parts of Reema's body were holding up, too.

At that moment, a barista called out their names. "CASSIE...REE!!"

Reema picked up her cup, turning it to read the neat, cursive lettering. "Ah, you don't even know how good it is to have your name spelled right." Cassie chuckled. "Uh, you seem surprised."

"When you have a name that sounds a bit ethnic, even ordering a coffee can become a spelling bee," Reema sighed. Going through life with a name like Reema, she was used to strangers messing up the spelling, pronunciation, and sometimes even the gender! She recalled some of the 'creative' interpretations she'd seen: 'R-E-M-A', 'R-E-A-M-A', 'R-E-B-A'. "As if I look like an old country singer from the South, anyway?!"

Cassie sighed in agreement while they exited the café.

When the class resumed, Reema took a more relaxed attitude toward notetaking. Her keen approach to school had evolved over the last month. She wasn't quite falling behind, nor was she racing to get ahead either. As deadlines came and went and finals neared, she just tried to keep pace. She developed a few coping habits to conserve her energy. Instead of meticulously combing through each word of each reading, she just browed through them, looking for key concepts. When transcribing lecture notes, it was no longer worth trying to document every single detail.

With less time and energy devoted to studying, Reema's nights of being buried in a library became rarer. Consequently, visits to the mall or the movies came to be the norm. These outings gave Reema a chance to test out her new clothes in a more public setting. She had acquired a penchant for shoes with heels, and loved it when Cassie wore them too, since the synchronized 'clicking' sound they made was actually quite funny to Reema.

The campus fitness centre was another preferred destination. The girls usually unwound there after a long day of classes. Her two-hour per day, five-day a week routine was making Reema a bona fide 'regular' at the gym. The current week had been gruelling: four consecutive workouts! She couldn't recall exactly why she and Cassie had planned it that way. On this, their fourth day in a row, one of the staff members came up and jokingly anointed her a 'gym rat'. She laughed at the thought: Reema Ahmed, a gym rat!

Although she found the label pretty absurd, Reema certainly was very comfortable with working out now. Moreover, she was confident. She was confident in her form and execution. She was confident in the workout gear that she wore. She was confident in her ability to have fun, breezy conversations with other patrons at the gym. In addition, she was also getting better at reading people's personalities and body language.

Today, as she took a drink at the water fountain, a tall young guy with short hair approached her. He was admittedly cute. The guy was trying to communicate something, but she couldn't precisely make out the words, watching his chiselled jaw move up and down.

Reema plucked out her iPod headphones. "Huh?"

The cute guy laughed. "I said that's a good song that you're listening to," pointing to the pink earbuds dangling between her mighty breasts. "I could hear it all the way over at the bench press!"

"Oh," Reema laughed back, turning down the volume on her LMFAO song. "Sorry about that. I kind of get into the music sometimes."

The guy put his hands up. "No no, don't apologize! Looks like you've got a better playlist going than the PA at this gym!"

As much as she enjoyed his commentary on the PA system, Reema knew this wasn't merely a chat about playlists. They were standing close together. His 6'2 frame and toned biceps swelled noticeably in his top. At the same time, Reema smiled back in her coordinated pink and black T-shirt and shorts.

"Well... catch you around," he excused himself, "Don't go downloading any Miley Cyrus anytime soon, alright!"

"I'll try not to," Reema assured him. The curious part of their conversation was that they didn't even exchange names. Come to think of it, she hadn't learned the names of many people at the gym. Just faces. And bodies. Somehow, the nameless attention still made her feel pretty good.

There was one name she was aware of, however, that didn't make her feel very good.

Josh Cameron was a 'regular', too, and frequently appeared at the gym at the same time as Reema and Cassie, much to the brown girl's chagrin.

In reality, it was entirely Cassie's doing. Josh was quite possibly her favorite part of everything with Remma. Beyond his good looks, she liked the twisted history between him and Reema. With all her mischievous plans, she still couldn't have imagined that someone like Josh would show up in their lives. Cassie knew that Reema couldn't stand him. Whenever he was in the same vicinity, she visibly tensed up. Cassie's admonitions "not to be rude", though, and friendly reminders that Josh was "a nice guy" forced Reema to reciprocate with friendly greetings of her own. Their brief encounters were useful for getting Reema to open up to people, but Cassie enjoyed stirring the pot on more devious level, too.

Today, Reema and Cassie were traveling between various workout stations, chatting about the importance of glutes. Suddenly, Cassie interrupted their conversation to wave at somebody. "Heyyy, Josh!!"

Reema peered down a row of exercised machines and recognized her high school classmate. Her eyes drifted away. She attempted to force a placid smile.

Josh's towering body radiated confidence as he approached. "Hey guys. Pumping iron again, huh? Are they going to set up a bed for you in the yoga studio, so you can just sleep here at night?"

"Not yet," Cassie chuckled. "We are getting to be regulars, though, aren't we, Ree?"

Reema's wishful, misguided hopes that it would just be a Josh-to-Cassie conversation were dashed. The spotlight was now on her. She was disinclined to tell him about her gym habits, no matter how proud she was about her recent dedication and progress.

"Uh, yeah, I guess," Reema closed-ended affirmed. She watched Josh stretch his fingers inside his weightlifting gloves. Then, without knowing why, she added, "We're kind of gym rats."

"Gym rats?" Josh repeated, "That's good, Reema. I like that. Gym rat."

As he said her name out loud, something bothered her. Perhaps she had become used to Cassie calling her 'Ree'. Maybe Josh saying it reminded her of high school, and the way he used to treat all her friends back then.

"I might be one myself, actually," he admitted. "But I'm taking a leave of absence next week."

"Aww, why?" Cassie sympathetically inquired.

"I've got a killer English paper coming up."

Unlike Cassie, Reema did not want to show any compassion. If Josh were locked away in his room, she would have a much happier week to look forward to. A week without seeing him strut around, flashing his big jerk smile all over the place -- most of all -- annoying her.

"English? Hmm," Cassie mused. "Ree's a superstar at essays. She totally knows her literature, too!"

Reema's skin jumped. She didn't know what Cassie was trying to pull, and privately wanted to implore her to stop.

"Oh, you are?" Josh turned to the journalism student.

If she was stewing on the inside, Reema tried not to show it. Feigning a polite smile, she replied, "Um sure, I guess?"

"Cool," Josh nodded, as if he'd just struck a deal with his former tormentee's girlfriend. "I may have to consult an English expert about this stupid fucking essay."

Reema didn't know what was happening. Flustered, she couldn't come up with a 'polite' answer. She knew Cassie would scold her for it later on. "OK, uh..."

"Ree is like a human Wikipedia," Cassie added. "She helps with my homework, like, so much."

"Great," Josh nodded with a laugh, before excusing himself, "Alright ladies, nice chatting again. I'm off to cram as many exercises as I can today, so see you later."

"I'm sure you will," Cassie joked. She looked at his broad, muscled chest and solid arms. Reema followed her gaze, noticing the same athletic upper-body.

Without any further talking, Josh left for the bench presses. Reema silently shot daggers at her blonde betrayer.

"What?!" Cassie laughed. "It's not like he's going to like stalk you for English advice, Ree. I just told him that you have mad skills, which is true! Nothing wrong with giving you credit where it's due."

Although Reema didn't say anything, she had a big problem with Cassie advertising her 'tutoring' services to Josh. She didn't want him to think of her as a study resource. Nor did she want to have Josh on her mind. The girls momentarily looked at him as he thrust the heavy weight bar up and down. Cassie chattered on, "Gotta love that smile. You can tell a lot about a guy from his teeth, you know. Oh, and his shoes!"

Reema's irritation faded the longer they continued to exercise. When they finally burned their requisite number of calories, the girls ended the session with a long shower.

In the days to follow, Reema's concerns about Josh were displaced by other activities and responsibilities. Her daily classes still required some level of attention. So did taking care of her daily wardrobe. She wore a little pair of shorts one day, black tights another; sporty shoes one day, flats on another. There were so many options and combinations to test out.

Sometimes, Reema used Instagram to validate her decision-making. She was becoming quite proficient with social media. Every few days, she would post a photo of her outfit choices. She added funny or self-deprecating captions like "All #denim, all the time" or "Picked up a cute top at #HandM. Does it work? #hopeso". The account received a fair amount of traction. There were dozens of likes, followers, and -- on occasion -- enthusiastic comments.

As much as Reema enjoyed getting virtual 'likes' for her social media endeavours, nothing compared to real-life compliments. Boys increasingly made a point of talking to her, even if they just ended up exchanging typical banter about events at the university, or the weather.

She and Cassie continued to bond, meanwhile. Cassie hosted regular 'homework' nights in her room during the week, which suited Reema fine, since it enabled her to visit Miguel on some weekends. In contrast to Reema's uptight study habits at the start of the year, their homework sessions became relatively loose -- full of gossip, music, and even a little drinking. For a long time, Reema preferred to only drink when they went out to social events. Now, though, she accepted that it was also OK to partake to a reasonable degree back at their dorm. In the middle of some of their study sessions, a few floormates would drop by, and before Reema knew what was happening the studying would turn into a lively group hang-out.

One Friday, Reema was cradling a phone to her ear as she wandered around her room, sorting through her closet. "Yeah, mom. Yeah, everything is fine."

With a grimace, she hoisted up a pair of black and gray sweatpants and tossed them onto her bed. She also extracted one of her baggier pairs of jeans.

"No no, I'm keeping up with everything. You don't need to... uh, you don't..."

Reema rolled her eyes whilst rummaging through old sweaters and tops. One was an old blue school sweater with white stripes running across the chest. It had been one of her favorites back in high school. She flung it onto the 'reject' pile, too.

"No. Uh-huh, I already did all my reading for the weekend. I'm going to see Miguel..."

Reema actually hadn't read a single word, but her mother didn't need to know that. When it came to undergarments, she had to stop to consider her options. She flashed back to the incident with Miguel and accidentally exposing her thong. Reema deliberately picked out some regular cotton panties and shut the drawer with a slam that her mother must have heard. She then dropped the 'granny panties' into her travel bag without any affection at all.

"No... I don't know what we're going to do yet," Reema said, sounding annoyed. She didn't mean to show her irritation, but it really was a silly question. She had no idea what their plans would be! Walking by a mirror and noticing her own face, Reema was reminded of something else. She would sadly have to abandon her contacts lenses for the weekend, too. She had been getting used to those.

"Listen, I really have to finish packing. I will tell Miguel you said hi, OK? Say hi to Dad for me... OK, bye!"

Reema sighed and tossed her phone onto the mattress. Then she threw herself down beside it. Everything seemed to exhaust her these days. Her mom had totally worn her out. As much visiting Miguel was also necessary to maintain their relationship, she barely had the energy to make the trip. Hanging out with him wasn't so much the problem. A lot of it was related to the travel bag beside her. She felt gross wearing anything in that bag. Unfortunately, Miguel would have weird reactions to her more recent wardrobe. He proved that by freaking out over one black thong. Reema would have to cloak herself in frumpy track pants and endure it the best she could.

Reema's phone rumbled. She sat up and searched for it amid the covers. It was a text from Miguel:

Can't wait to see you tomorrow :D

She replied haphazardly:

Yeah me too. Night!

Reema's face didn't match the apparent enthusiasm in her text. It wasn't overly late at night. Normally, she would have exchanged more messages, but chose to call it quits anyway. She browsed a few social media pages, then stuffed her remaining clothes into a travel bag.

The following day, Miguel looked ecstatic as Reema stepped off the bus. His wide eyes and beaming smile confirmed it. She noticed the prickliness of the stubble on his chin when they embraced for a kiss.

Back in Miguel's dorm room, he rearranged his belongings to make more space. Reema wondered why he didn't do that before she arrived; perhaps he was busy. He sat on the bed and she plopped down beside him.

"I'm glad you're!" he said.

"Yeah, me too," Reema agreed. Self-consciously, she threaded her fingers together. They were fidgety. Miguel took note.

"Heh, that's a nice color. Did you do them yourself?"

She'd forgotten about her nail polish. Reema was glad he couldn't see the other 'treatments' she'd had done. She used the fewest words possible to explain: "Oh, nope. Got them painted somewhere."

Miguel sat up. He took her hands and held them in the air. Not understanding what he was doing, Reema almost flinched. "They're pretty," he said. Then he looked up at her. His eyes were large. His lips curved into a big, closed-mouthed smile.

Reema smiled back, suppressing a discomfort that she couldn't quite make sense of. Mustering a sudden burst of energy, she pulled her hands away and asked, "So, how are you?!"

Miguel launched into a long speech about...uh... well, something? Lab projects, work partners, grades, bell curves. Reema didn't know if it was the bus ride that made her feel tired today, but she started to zone out. All she could focus on was Miguel's wispy moustache and his lips moving up and down.

"Anyways, I must be boring you," he apologized, snapping her out of her trance. Reema smiled to herself as he finally changed the subject, "You must be hungry."

She was. Fortunately, their next activity was eating dinner. To this end, they went for a walk downtown. They held hands along the way, looking and acting like an average couple. As they arrived at a popular Thai restaurant, Reema felt relieved. At least eating a nice dinner could be enjoyable. Getting Thai food was also a perfectly normal activity for them. She and Miguel used to love pigging out on it back in high school. This place even resembled the old Thai restaurant they used to frequent. It had long lines of tables, cozy booths, lots of mirrors, and a flowery décor. Everything looked tidy and well maintained.

"So tell me what's new at Montgomery," Miguel enthused, beginning to dig into his food.

Reema was half-way through a spoonful of a spicy soup. "Uh, not too much. Just trying to get by, I guess!"

Miguel laughed. "Oh, come on. There must be more to it than that!"

She shrugged, offering a nervous chucked. "Uh, I really don't know. It's mostly been the same stuff. Reading... doing papers. Trying to keep sane..."

"Oh, I know what that's like," Miguel commiserated. He stuffed too many noodles between his chopsticks and tried to fit them in his mouth. A blob of curry sauce dropped out. Reema quietly resumed her meal. She reached for a spring roll, dipped it in plum sauce, and took a modest bite. She was conscious of the loud crunch.

"There was a pep rally here for the football team, on Thursday... or something," he said.

"Oh! Did you go?"

He shook his head. "Nope, but I did walk by on my way to the library. It looked fun. There was some music... and performances... and bubbles."