Dennis Inn

Author's Note: Special thanks to NG, who wishes to remain anonymous, for contributing most of the male character's side of the message exchange.

December 2016

The Dennis Inn is a rambling, two-story brick building angled at an awkward slope overlooking a busy highway. My car's tires crackle on gravel as I pull into a parking spot. I turn off the car and take a deep breath that does nothing to slow the pulse pounding in my ears. Fake it till you make it, Julie. Resolutely, I sling my small duffel bag over my shoulder and exit the car. I try to project an easy confidence, striding across the parking lot with my chin up and my back straight, my high-heeled leather boots clacking boldly with each step.

A bell dings when I push open the glass door to the hotel office. The clerk, a middle aged black man with glasses, greets me with a friendly smile from behind the desk. Resisting the urge to avoid his eyes, I smile back.

"Welcome to the Dennis Inn. Checking in?"

I nod and give my name. He requests my driver's license and credit card. I dig them out of my purse and slide them toward him with my right hand while my left remains in my coat pocket, thumb rolling back and forth over the smooth ridge of my wedding ring. I wonder if he finds it strange that my home address is only a few miles from our current location. Or more likely he sees that all the time and knows exactly what it means and what I'm doing here. There is no change in his demeanor.

I nod politely while he tells me about continental breakfast and check out time, not really listening because I know I'll be leaving here in a few hours instead of tomorrow morning. Surely he must know that as well and is only giving this speech to preserve appearances. I tell myself I'm being ridiculous thinking this man who's just doing his job gives a shit about me or why I'm at the Inn. And even if he does, so what? Is a stranger's judgment worth anything?

***

July 2016

I don't know exactly what I was looking for when I registered for the "sex and romance" discussion board. It was one of many off-topic sections of an internet forum aimed at parents in and around my city. I'd browsed the boards on and off since having my first child seven years ago, but I'd stuck to the parenting sections. Until one day in July, bored and restless on a slow work day and deciding I'd had enough of the mommy wars, I clicked over to "sex and romance." I discovered a voyeuristic fascination in reading about other people's sex lives, and it wasn't long before I created an account in order to participate myself. I chose bored_and_old as my username as a nod to Nirvana lyrics that expressed how I'd been feeling lately - a strange re-awakening of something akin to teenage angst, a constant and unsettling yearning for something I couldn't describe. Existential anguish? A mid-life crisis? I posted in the member introductions thread.

bored_and_old: Hi! I'm a married 35-year-old mother of two. Bored. Hoping for interesting conversation with fun, open-minded people.

A few hours later I received a private message in my inbox.

EverybodyWantsSome: Would love to help ease your boredom.

I checked the user's posting history. A 42-year-old man who had made an account the previous week and had posted playfully sarcastic comments in a few threads. His sense of humor, not to mention a certain sense of kinship with his rock lyric username, prompted me to respond.

bored_and_old: How would you entertain me?

EverybodyWantsSome: Well, this is a sex forum...I have a vivid imagination and a very dirty mind. I enjoy exchanging fantasies...

bored_and_old: Sounds intriguing...I haven't done that sort of thing before and I don't think I'm particularly kinky. I would love to break out of my shell a bit, however. So in that spirit, my fantasy is being with someone who gets me so hot I lose all inhibitions and self-control. Nothing but passionate, animal lust.

EverybodyWantsSome: Wanting to try new things is sexier than pretending to be kinky. That losing all inhibitions thing is tricky. I think it has more to do with chemistry than anything else. Raw animal lust is, I think, part pent up desire (or frustration) and part attraction. The former is easy, and many of us suffer from it. The latter is one of those things you either have with another person or not.

I have lots of fantasies, but one I would love to explore is to completely dominate and own a woman sexually. Part of that would be controlling her orgasms so that she is so worked up that, coincidentally, she loses all her inhibitions...

bored_and_old: Oh, I want to try new things...

Pent up desire/frustration seems surprisingly and discouragingly common among married people if the threads here are any indication. On the one hand, it's nice to know I'm not alone. On the other, it sucks to know that passionless, lackluster sex is such an epidemic.

Tell me more about your fantasy. Would you tie her up? Would she have to beg before you'd let her cum?

EverybodyWantsSome: Sexual frustration in marriage really is an epidemic. My wife suffers from terminal monogamy. Like so many of the women on these boards, she claims to lack a sex drive. I suspect, however, that if she or they had a lover outside the marriage, their libidos would kick into overdrive. They're interested in sex, just not in sex with their husbands.

As for my fantasy, I think tying her up would definitely be part of it. Takes the temptation of touching herself out of play. Because, yes, she would definitely have to beg before I'd let her cum. She might have a mouthful of my cock while she's begging, but beg she would! Oh, the things I would do to tease her...bringing her closer and closer to climax without letting her cum, over and over again. Ultimately, I'd love to train her to cum from things she might previously have never thought she could climax from without direct stimulation to her clit. Might never happen but, oh how fun it will be to try!

bored_and_old: Very true, monogamy is totally unnatural. I'll spare you the academic lecture, but I've done a lot of reading on the subject lately. I think women crave variety even more than men. Men seem to be more fixated on frequency.

...

So you'd want her in a frenzy, begging for relief and straining against the restraints? What would you do to get her there?

EverybodyWantsSome: Maybe to a degree, but frequency isn't enough in and of itself. My wife and I have had many conversations over the years about our sexual mismatch and her only concession has been to offer me more frequent duty sex. She does the bare minimum not to drive me away. If I so much as hint at having unmet needs she bursts into tears and complains that nothing she does is ever good enough for me.

...

With her legs tied at the ankles to the corners of the bed so her pussy is spread wide for me and she feels the cool air on her wetness, I'd spend a lot of time licking and kissing all of the places that most arouse her...neck, nipples, inner thighs...except that I would make sure nothing touches her clit. Maybe, if she's very good, I might slowly rub the engorged head of my cock up and down her swollen pussy lips...just enough to tease her...and enough that it leaves a trail of her moisture as I drag it up her belly and over her breasts...finally holding my cock directly in front of her mouth. How she reacts to that will determine what happens next. She should be realizing by now that her body belongs to me...

bored_and_old: So what you really want is something more than duty sex? Does she just, like, lie back and think of England?

...

She knows you own her completely. She surrenders, giving you control of her body, her pleasure, because she understands you're the only one who can give her what she craves. Her mouth opens greedily, desperate to taste you. She begs for it, any sense of self-consciousness or embarrassment long since extinguished. She can't hold anything back. Wanton, shameless, exposed. Awaiting your pleasure.

EverybodyWantsSome: What I really want is for her to act like she gives a shit about the sex we are having. I want it to be about more than just me getting her off. I want her to be willing to discuss our sex life, tell me her fantasies, be willing to try new things or at least not react like I'm some kind of pervert when I try to talk about fantasies or experiment.

I wouldn't say she lies back and thinks of England. She might not have spontaneous desire, but she does have responsive desire and she always cums hard by the time I'm done with her. She just takes me for granted. She doesn't do anything to seduce me or build my desire but gets offended if I'm not immediately hard and ready when she offers sex. Which she does, incidentally, by standing next to her side of the bed in her trademark sweatpants and baggy t-shirt and saying "wanna do it?"

...

I barely brush your lips with the swollen head of my cock, teasing you, allowing you to catch the dripping precum on your tongue.

"How badly do you want to suck my cock right now?" I ask. "How far will you go to please me with that sweet, dirty mouth? Will you worship my cock, balls, and asshole? Will you swallow every drop of my cum and lick my cock clean? Show me just how much you want to be owned by me."

bored_and_old: She won't discuss sex with you? What fantasies/new things have you brought up that she reacted to so negatively?

...

"You own me," I breathe, the words muffled as I glide my tongue across the tip of your cock. I lick a leisurely trail downward, pausing at the base of your shaft to suck your cock all the way into my mouth. I draw you slowly in and out several times before releasing to lap my tongue around the rim of your cockhead. I am attuned to your body's reactions, alert to the quickening of your breath, the gentle rock of your hips. My sole purpose is your pleasure and I am determined to learn every nuance of how to please you.

My tongue slips lower so I can coat your ball sack with my saliva, claiming every bit of skin in long, firm strokes. I suck one side gently into my mouth, then the other. I reach your asshole and roll my tongue around the rim, over and over, pleased by the groan that escapes you and answering with one of my own. I thrust my tongue into your asshole, straining to reach as deep as I can. I ache with the need to bring you pleasure, to learn exactly what you need and give it to you. There is nothing I won't do for your approving smile.

EverybodyWantsSome: Small things, like trying a new move or a variation on a move. She'll say, "you don't always have to try something new, you know." She refuses to tell me what she likes or wants sexually and if I ask how it was she just says "fine." If I ask about her fantasies she says she doesn't have any. She won't exchange sexy pics or emails to build up the tension throughout the day. Once I suggested getting a dildo to use on her and she acted like it was the most depraved idea she'd ever heard.

...

I moan as your tongue thrusts into my ass. "That's my good little slut. I will expect unquestioning obedience if you wish to be mine," I say, watching you eagerly lick, suck and stroke me, your enthusiasm making me as hard as your mouth and tongue have.

You deserve a reward and I shift my hips to position my cock against your lips, which wrap around it obligingly. Watching the way you moan as I fuck your mouth pleases me and momentarily I begin to groan, as my cock blasts its hot, thick, salty prize into your mouth and down your throat. Spurt after spurt of hot cum fills your mouth. I smile as you greedily swallow all of it. My breath ragged, I lean against the headboard watch you suck the last drops of cum from my rigid shaft. I bend down and kiss you, tasting my cum in your mouth and whisper, your turn...I unbind your wrists and then shift position until we are in a 69. I gently begin to flick my tongue over your swollen clit, finding just the right pressure and rhythm to bring you to your first orgasm, wondering how many I can give you before I am ready to fuck your deliciously wet pussy.

bored_and_old: Hmm, well what were you planning to do with the dildo? Maybe she thought you wanted to try double penetration? That might freak me out a little, honestly.

...

When I feel your talented tongue moving over my clit, applying just the right pressure in just the right spot, my every nerve is so raw with anticipation that I climax almost immediately. The most intense orgasm rips through my body as I buck my hips wildly against your face, screaming your name. The waves of pleasure start to dissipate and then, impossibly, to build once again, responding to your mouth's persistence. I grab your hips above my face and shift so I can lick your balls, caressing them with the flat of my tongue. My lips pull the loose skin of your sack into my mouth and I suck gently. I moan against you as I feel myself building to another orgasm, and my tongue slides higher, teasing around your asshole. Then I explode again, seeing stars, undulating in a sea of pure sensation. I am completely undone, and yet your mouth is relentless, demanding more. I don't know how much more I can take. "Please," I whisper, "I want your cock in my pussy. I need it."

EverybodyWantsSome: DP is so far from anything my wife would consider that it was not even on my radar. What I wanted was to use the dildo in her pussy while I licked her clit. From her reaction you would've thought I'd asked her to be in a gang bang or make amateur porn.

Anyway, I'm monopolizing the conversation here. What's your story? Any unmet needs in your marriage?

...

The moment arrives...that we both knew was inevitable the second we met: when you would willingly, eagerly, give up your married pussy to me. I get up to stand at the side of the bed, unbind your ankles and grasp them to guide you until you are on your back, ass on the edge of the bed. I push your legs up and spread them to expose you to me and slowly press the head of my swollen, engorged cock at your drenched entrance, then slide inside you until my balls slap against your ass, finally claiming your pussy as mine. I admire your body and smile at the blissful look of surrender and ecstasy on your beautiful face as I begin to thrust. Long, slow thrusts at first, then harder, faster, rougher, pushing your legs back as I hold your ankles.

"Play with your clit," I order you. I pull out, kneeling between your legs to lick your asshole as you massage your clit. I plunge my tongue deep in your ass and slip a finger in your pussy to find your g-spot as you moan and rub yourself. When I know you're starting to get close again I tell you, "Don't cum until I say you can." I stand up again and plunge my cock back inside your pussy, then pound you hard, almost brutally, watching your breasts bounce wildly and your eyes roll back in your head...

bored_and_old: Oh, that...doesn't sound so bad. Pretty hot, actually...

Sigh. Unmet needs. I love my husband. We are great together as companions and life partners. But our sex life? No foreplay, unless you count me sucking his dick to get him hard, a few minutes of PIV until he cums, then he leaves me alone to finish myself off with a vibrator. I have tried a lot of things to spice things up, but there's never any lasting effect and I've concluded that he's just fundamentally selfish in bed. I'm not sure that's something it's possible to change, since it's a mindset rather than a skillset, you know?

...

I pump my hips to match your rhythm - growing rougher now, relentless, demanding surrender. My entire body sparks with pleasure at your every thrust. I feel your cock deep inside my pussy, deeper than I thought was possible, awakening sensation in places I didn't know I had. I've never felt so deliciously full. I watch you through a haze of pleasure as your hips roll expertly, grinding your cock into me at just the right angle to rub against some hidden spot, known only to you, that makes me shudder and gasp. My eyes lose their focus; my head falls back in abandon. A pull deep in my gut warns me that yet another orgasm is imminent. Desperate to obey you, to find release only at your command, I bite my lip and still my fingers on my clit. "Please!" I cry out, panting. "I can't hold back. I need to cum!"

EverybodyWantsSome: Wow, now I feel bad for complaining! He doesn't give you oral? Do you talk to him about what you want?

...

"Cum for me," I command. I increase the speed and intensity of my thrusts, pounding you hard, feeling my balls tighten as I begin to cum. I gasp and grunt as I explode in your pussy, pumping my sperm deep inside your quivering, pulsating, contracting, climaxing pussy, thrusting with each spurt until I've spent my load and you gasp with the final tremors of your own orgasm, legs shaking. I pull out, seeing my cum leak out of your married pussy, and climb up on the bed offering my cum-covered cock for you to clean with your mouth. "Lick it clean," I say. "Don't miss any of it. Then scoop it out of your pussy with your fingers and lick them clean."

bored_and_old: I tell him what I want, but he thinks he's awesome at sex and knows my body better than I do, so he doesn't listen. He doesn't offer oral on his own, but he'll do it if I ask. The problem is he's not very good at it because he doesn't listen to what I like, so it takes a while and I can tell he's impatient and trying to rush me so we can get to the "good stuff." I can't cum like that and it's a frustrating experience for both of us. So I never ask for it.

...

I am only too happy to oblige, swirling my tongue over your still-throbbing cock, lapping with greedy strokes to consume every droplet of your cum. I sigh in satisfaction as I taste your salt mingled with my juices, a delectable bouquet of the passion we've shared. My fingers work inside my slick pussy, sliding through the swollen folds. When your cock is licked clean, glistening with my saliva, I bring my hand to my mouth. Eagerly, I suckle at my cum-drenched fingers, careful not to miss a drop. I raise my mouth to yours, wanting to share, wanting you to taste us.

EverybodyWantsSome: Well, that just sucks. Or doesn't, as the case may be. I don't understand his mindset at all. Why would any man not want to eat his wife's pussy every chance he can get for as long as she can stand it? Nothing is hotter than giving a woman orgasms!

...

Looking down at you, I smile, thinking good girl...I lean down and kiss you, tasting both of us in your mouth. I move between your still shaking thighs, lick deep within the puffy folds of your slippery pussy finding a little bit of my cum leaking out of you and move back up to let you suck it from my tongue and kiss you deeply again. I collapse on to the bed next to you, lying on my back and run my hand along your soft skin, from thigh to breast.

Knowing that you will be going home to your husband so well used and violated makes me smile wickedly. The delicious thrill I know you will get from it makes my grin even bigger. You're such a good little slut for me and I can see how much it pleases you to serve me this way.