Diary of a Rockstar Ch. 01

COMMENTS are always welcome. I am starting a new series while still working on various one-shot stories. Some I've taken down to re-write, but they will be back up soon. Please comment away!

Chapter 1

The Corruption of Paige Whitman

Paige Whitman wasn't your typical high school girl, but she was your typical Hayley Williams wannabe high school rockstar. At just 18, Paige had already made a name for herself travelling all over her home state of Michigan with various local acts who were much more well-known than her. It was tough, playing in a pop-emo band and opening for bands comprised of guys older than her own father who usually played to beer-soaked audiences at various dives she would only be permitted entrance to when it was her time to go on stage (if said venue even had a stage). More often than not, Paige ended up playing darkened corners at bowling alleys, local pizza joints, and dance clubs. Flying Castles was the name of her band, and Paige was lucky if the owner of the venues remembered the name right after they finished their well-practiced 35-minute set.

Paige had milky white skin, emerald green eyes that she kept painted various shades of blue, and bright dyed-maroon hair. She had a petite body with medium-sized breasts and a big bubble butt that she always found drew unwanted glances from men anytime she turned around. Anytime she went to the beach, Paige was used to turning around finding a few men quickly diverting their eyes from her rear. Men and boys alike liked looking at her, which she didn't mind so much when she was on stage. Up there, Paige was a rockstar to anybody who cared to stop and listen to her band.

It was just a pipe dream that ate into her homework time and made her late for her part time job selling cookies at the mall for minimum wage. But that pipe dream started to become a reality the summer before her senior year when she got signed to an upcoming label called Sonic Wave Records. They helped produce a music video for her band, which was shot at her high school after school hours and sent her on tour all over the Midwest. By the time she came back, her video was already in heavy circulation online and MTV. Kids her age and much younger were even starting to show up to their shows, so she began making homemade t-shirts for them. One night, while singing at a Halloween party for most of her senior class, enjoying popularity for the first time since high school began, a drunk student threw a tiara at her while screaming, "Paige Whitman for Homecoming Queen!"

That turned into a chant that she couldn't stop. Paige had to laugh, deciding to turn the situation around quickly.

"I'm the princess of Flying Castles!" she had cried out playfully as she crowned herself, laughing at the absurdity of even being considered for such a silly thing.

Paige didn't care about high school or it's obsession with popularity contests.

She cared about her friends, family, band, and the few amazing fans she had.

But what Paige loved most about her band was that her boyfriend was her guitarist.

Bobby Tanner, a cute boy with messy black hair and brown eyes, had been childhood friends with Paige when they lived next door to each other. But when Bobby and Paige lost touch when Bobby had to move away because his father got reassigned to a different military base. It was fate that brought them back together years later. Bobby and Paige fell in love when Bobby moved back into town and started attending the same high school as Paige .A secret crush Paige had on Bobby quickly formed into a lasting connection, which soon led Paige into forming her first physical relationship with a boy, having only stolen a couple of kisses before Bobby. Now she was lost in a relationship with a boy she was deeply in love with, and was slowly coming into womanhood in her first sexual relationship.

Paige and Bobby were each other's first everything.

But while slowly getting used to sharing her body with her boyfriend, Paige was also able to explore her fascination with sex and the male body, especially her boyfriend's penis. Bobby was uncircumcised and about six inches when he was fully erect, which might as well have been a foot when it was inside her, stretching her tight walls out. Sex was painful at first for her, so she decided to try getting off from oral sex. It wasn't hard to convince Bobby to kiss her privates, or to let her return the favor. Over the course of their relationship, Paige found Cosmo and the Internet to be her best friends when it came to all the sex stuff. She always wanted to make sure Bobby was well satisfied, and that she was being a dutiful rockstar girlfriend., She feared a No Doubt/Paramore style split in the bad once they broke the news, but that storm never came. Instead, her other band mates got girlfriends of their own, or found they were more content fooling around with eager female fans and groupies before and after shows while on tour.

And so became Paige's life after graduation, balancing a boyfriend, a band, and a part time job, all while preparing to go to college with her other band mates.

But one day, while actually getting some homework done, Paige got a call from a man named Ken Stanton who had somehow gotten a hold of one of the demos her band had released at the Battle of the Bands show she performed at the year before.

Ken invited her, the band, and all of their families out to dinner that weekend, and before she had to return to school on Monday, Flying Castles was a signed act. Ken was a good-looking guy, Paige had thought when she first met him. He had styled black hair and piercing eyes that somehow always seemed to find their way to Paige.

Ken was always making phone calls, exchanging e-mails, and working hard to make sure his clients were getting where they needed to go and treated the way they deserved to be treated. He was also over twice Page's age, pushing 40 years old, though he didn't look it. But she tried to push any reservations about Ken out of her head. Soon, Paige's head was spinning in discussions about music videos, tours, press releases, etc. That was what she really cared about: the dream. Nothing more.

Things were going great for Paige and the band, until the roster for Warped Tour came up and Flying Castles' name was nowhere to be seen on any of the posters. But one of the other bands on her same label did show up, which made Paige furious. Her band was pretty upset too, including Bobby, but they figured they were the new band on the label and had to wait to pay their dues before they got driven around across the country playing one of the biggest punk rock festivals a band like theirs could play. Still, that answer didn't satisfy Paige.

"Would you consider... putting us on the roster?" Paige had asked Ken one day, after stopping by his office.

"I just think we need to work some more in the studio... on the live performance," Ken had said over and over. "Plus, you can't drink yet, and there's a lot of alcohol going around at these things. That can mean disaster for a label if even one of you comes into contact with it... and don't get me started on the sponsors."

Ken was blowing her off, which Paige didn't appreciate. But the other band going out, its members were a few years older, almost out of college now, so Ken wasn't lying about that. What she wished was that she had some way of proving to Ken that she was mature and could handle herself out there on the road. But the real problem in her way was the lead singer of the band ahead of them. Paige was nearly positive that Ken was having sex with her. She couldn't prove it, but when she walked into his office one day unannounced, it was obvious the two had been flirting. Plus, she saw the girl, Aurora, leave Ken's office with rumpled clothes and messy hair on more than one occasion.

Paige considered if she was the type of girl who would do the same thing. Not that she could, she had a boyfriend. But what if she didn't, she kept asking herself?

"Are you sleeping with Aurora?" Paige had finally asked.

Ken stopped what he was doing incredulous that she might even ask such a question. "I... what kind of a question is that?"

"A fair one. I've seen the way you two talk..."

"I... my relationship with Aurora has nothing to do with her band going out."

"Well, if... it did... I wouldn't mind really."

"You wouldn't?" Ken asked, confused.

"No, because... I mean, I have a boyfriend, and... I give him preferential treatment sometimes, so... if I had a problem with it, I'd be a pretty big hypocrite, wouldn't I?"

"I suppose..." Ken was unsure where the conversation was headed. He had not been pleased that he had been so sloppy to let other bands figure out he was fucking a client.

"But... if I could do something to... earn preferential treatment..." Paige stammered.

"Paige, you're... there's Bobby."

"Is that the only reason you would have reservations?" Paige asked Ken, stepping toward him in front of his desk and suddenly feeling his true stature and power over her.

"It's rarely a good idea to get involved with clients. I shouldn't be with Aurora, for this reason right here, right now," Ken stated, finally checking Paige out, his eyes falling to her small bust, and then travelling back up to her lips.

Paige wondered whether he was imagining kissing her breasts, or something entirely else? Let him fantasize, she thought. The idea of him fantasizing about her made her body betray her better nature. She felt a flood of wetness and excitement between her legs she hadn't felt for anyone since she started dating Bobby. It made Paige, feel ashamed, and embarrassed.

"What if I talked to Bobby..." Paige asked.

"I... I don't know..."

"Let me just talk to him," Paige said, before leaving Ken alone and frustrated in his office. She wondered if he'd masturbate while thinking of her right in his office.

When Paige pulled Bobby aside in her room late that night, he flipped out.

"You what!" Bobby exclaimed, incredulous at what he heard.

"We only talked about it. Nothing happened," Paige reassured.

"But it could if you're considering it. He's... he's almost 40, Paige! You're not even 20!"

"I know, but... I really think we can get out there. And if this is all Ken want - "

"All Ken wants?" Bobby interrupted. "Is cheating on me not that big of a deal?"

"I'm not cheating, I'm telling you. And it's not technically the first time. Remember that party where we all played truth or dare, and I had to give Remi a handjob in front of everyone, including you? You were okay with that."

"It was a handjob, not sex, and I got to see you make out with Amanda because of that, so there was an upside to it for me," Bobby explained.

"So let me give you an upside to this..." Paige said.

"What's that?"

"If you find me a willing girl... I'll let you watch us," Paige admitted uncomfortably, remembering the awkward sensation of having to make out with a girl she barely knew.

"Watch you do what?"

Paige sighed. "Watch us have sex, okay?"

"You'd be with another girl?" Bobby asked, suddenly forgetting his reservations.

"Yes. If I agreed that I liked her too," Paige quickly added.

Bobby considered this. "You promise?"

Paige was suddenly shocked at how quickly he was changing his mind.

"I promise," Paige stated.

"And you aren't going to leave me for Ken?"

"What! No! This is for us... for the band, not for the sex, okay? I mean, you won't leave me for the girl you want to watch me with, will you?"

"No."

"Good," Paige said.

"I want to be there, though," Bobby added.

"What? Like... when I'm... with Ken?" Paige asked, shocked.

"Yes."

"Bobby, you don't have to... I mean... do you... want to be there?"

"I want to support you. I love you. I want to be your boyfriend no matter what."

Paige smiled. She truly loved Bobby and was happy he would be there, though she wasn't sure if it was the best idea she could think of for their relationship. Did Bobby get off thinking about her with other men, she wondered. She knew he loved it when she made out with the girl at the party, as he kept asking her about the experience when they fooled around for months afterward. The notion of having to recall the details of her first lesbian experience to Bobby was a slight turn on for Paige. However, the idea that she had to have sex with another woman scared her as she wasn't gay, but until now she also wasn't the polyamorous type or much of an exhibitionist, either. This was all very new territory for Paige's sexuality, which was blooming in a way she never imagined.

When Paige and Bobby showed up at Ken's office the next day and explained the situation to him, Ken seemed slightly more comfortable with it knowing Bobby was on board. The idea of fucking her in front of Bobby didn't seem to turn Ken off at all, Paige realized. She wondered if he'd get off on it, or had done something like this before with Aurora.

"Are you sure you want to be here for this, Bobby?" Ken asked.

Bobby watched Paige shift anxiously on her feet, the gazelle in the lion's den. He couldn't abandon her when he had promised to be there through the whole thing. Still, the thought of watching his girlfriend give herself so willingly to another man mad him insanely jealous and stirred a possessive side of his character he hadn't yet been acquainted with. And yet, something inside his loins stirred and drew him to stay.

"I'm in love with Paige, and she wants me to be here."

Paige smiled warmly. She was happy Bobby was here, though she wasn't sure what it would do to their relationship once he actually watched her have sex with another man. She was so used to Bobby, she wasn't sure how she'd handle intimacy with another man, let alone Ken. She tried to control her breathing and prepare herself mentally for what she was getting herself into. This was what being a woman was all about, Paige thought. She wasn't a girl anymore, so she had to make these sorts of decisions on her own. Her heart raced inside her chest to think Bobby was even watching her now. It was all for him, she kept reminding herself. She was doing this so she could be with Bobby and live her dream with him.

"And Paige, you're okay with him watching you?"

"I don't want there to be any secrets between us. I want Bobby to know that I'm only doing this for us, not because I'm a slut or straying... not that I don't like you!" she quickly corrected, nervous about her choice of wording to and about her manager.

"Fair enough. But I don't think anyone in this room thinks anything like that about you. I know Bobby is crazy about you, Paige, but so am I. We're all friends tonight."

"I know," Paige said, sipping the soda in front of her nervously.

"So if there's anything at all I can do to make you or Bobby more comfortable..."

"I think I'm as comfortable as I'm going to be."

"Well, how about we dance? Do you like to dance?"

Ken picked up a nearby remote and, with a click of a button, filled the office with a soft jazz ensemble. His moving expertly and the hunger in Ken's eyes made Paige feel like a nervous schoolgirl. She awkwardly put her arms around him as he slid his hand around the small of her back and gently pressed himself against her. Where Bobby was a boy, Ken was a man, nearly twice her age and size. She shuddered to think how big his penis might be, and if it would hurt when it was actually inside of her. Paige tried to push the thought from her mind, unaware of how excited it was making her.

Paige had a fascination with penises and thought about them constantly whenever she masturbated. The first time she'd given Bobby a handjob, she let him watch her masturbate at the same time just because she wanted to know what it would feel like to have an orgasm with the actual organ in her hand. It also helped that she loved the person it was attached to. When Paige had finally came, she had never felt so ashamed or embarrassed in her life. But when she was naked with Bobby, nothing was ever off limits for him. However he wanted to touch her, caress her, talk to her, or fuck her... Paige was always happy to oblige. Nothing was off limits. Just like tonight, she kept reminding herself.

"You're an amazingly beautiful woman, Paige," Ken told her. Paige blushed.

"Thank you..." she said.

"You don't have to do this you know..."

"I know, but... I want to make you feel good."

Ken pulled Paige against his crotch. She felt a stiff bulge press against her pelvis. He was definitely going to be bigger than Bobby, which made her nervous and excited.

"Do you feel what you do to me, Paige?"

Paige awkwardly slid her hand down over his belt and gently cupped the bulge. She saw the breath escape from Ken's mouth when she put her hands on him. She smiled at Ken and blushed. Bobby watched this, amazed at how aroused he was becoming...

Paige felt Ken's hand slide beneath her shirt and stop at her underwire. He started to caress the skin just beneath her bra. They looked into each other's eyes, Paige obviously more nervous that Bobby was watching them than Ken seemed to be. She hoped he would be a good lover and that she could at least please him in return. He had probably been with dozens of women, maybe hundreds. How could she or would she compare? She kept wondering why Ken would even want her.

"You can put your hands under my bra if you want," Paige said matter-of-factly.

"Do you like it when I touch you like this?"

"Yeah..." she nodded bashfully, feeling the bulge stiffen against her groin.

Paige continued to massage the bulge in Ken's pants gently as his hands slipped under her underwire and over the naked flesh of her breasts under her bra. He ran his fingers over and around her nipples, gently teasing and pulling them. He then kneaded her breasts and massaged them gently, which felt like Heaven to Paige. Even Bobby had never given her a breast massage like this before.

"That feels nice," Paige murmured.

Bobby just watched Ken continue to grope his girlfriend, wondering how much of this he could take before speaking up. Still, the idea of Ken feeling Paige up kind of excited Bobby in a twisted way that he wasn't familiar with.

Ken slipped a hand out of Paige's bra and slid it back down her tummy and toward her pants. He gently traced his fingers across the naked skin just above her pants, occasionally dragging them just inside her panties and back out again. Finally, he slipped his hand down into her underwear, down the silky smooth path to her vagina where he found her aching nub and wetness. Paige moaned when his fingers slipped over her privates, a part of her body only Bobby had ever been allowed to see or touch before. And here she was, letting her manager touch it. The sensation of his hands in her pants and on her body made her melt.

"You shave," Ken said smiling.

"I hope you like it."

"I do. I always wondered if you did or not."

Ken slipped his middle finger into Paige's vagina, which caused her to stir.

She blushed when he did, but wasn't prepared for the pleasure she would feel

Paige whimpered like an animal and pressed herself closer to Ken. She turned and looked at Bobby who watched them nervously. Paige felt Ken's fingers slip into her wetness and begin to gently penetrate her, in and out over and over. Ken brought his other hand out of her bra to pull her panties and jeans away from her body so that he could look inside them at her hairless pubic region.

"I think it's really hot that you shave. It's a sexy look for you..." Ken told her.

"Thanks," Paige replied, nervously.

Ken removed his fingers from Paige and showed them to her, covered in her wetness and tainted in her forbidden aroma. The sight and smell of her arousal excited Paige in a way she had never felt before. Ken then did something unexpected when he put the mess to her mouth. Paige opened it, suddenly aware that she was meant to suck her own excitement off his fingers. She closed her eyes and took him into her mouth, slowly sucking on his fingers.