Dirty Work

My screenplay for the non-existant film 'Dirty Work' from my story 'Star ch 1'.

Emily stepped into the office of the waste collection manager a little timidly. Although she was fairly self-confidant, starting a new job was always worrying. And this job was something few women ever considered, actually working on a refuse collection round. The manager greeted her warmly, shaking her hand and asking her to sit.

"Emily, I asked you to wait after your induction this afternoon so you could meet the two men you'll be working with as well as to issue you with your kit. I explained to you that we were having to expand our collections and these two are a long established team who will show you the ropes." He stopped as two weary looking men came into the office. "This is Pops and Andy, the crew you'll be joining."

"Hi!" She said brightly, standing and extending her hand.

"Hello, Emily wasn't it? I'm Andy." The younger of the two men said, shaking her hand. "We were told you'd be joining our crew."

"So you must be Pops?" Emily asked the unshaven older man who hadn't spoken yet. "I take it that that's only a nickname?"

"It's just what everyone calls me." He said shrugging. He didn't shake her hand. "I'm actually Phillip, or Pip, but 'Pops' is fine."

"Well, these two gentlemen will teach you everything you need to know Emily." The manager said, giving Pops a look. "Everyone will be learning a new collection round, but these two, especially this old sod, will give you a distinct advantage. They know everything. All the routes, all the skives. But if you have a question just ask them or me and we'll be happy to answer. Report back here Monday at seven and we'll take it from there."

***

Pops waited until the girl and his second driver had left before he said anything.

"Why am I getting the total newbie and a girl at that?"

"Calm down Pops. If she's got what it takes, you are the one who'll bring it out of her. She's keen and not stupid, and willing to learn."

"Is that some sort of backhanded compliment?"

"Yes. You know if I put her with someone else, they'll destroy her before she has the chance to prove herself."

"What if she can't do the job?"

"You know I trust your judgement. If you say she can't do it after a couple of weeks, then I know she can't, but give her the opportunity to try please."

Pops shrugged.

"Okay, I'll give her the chance."

The manager sighed.

"That's all I ask. Now get lost until Monday." The two men grinned at each other.

***

Emily entered the canteen on Monday morning after clocking in and was immediately overawed. There were so many people that she didn't know yet, all talking and joking. Andy, her new crewmate, spotted her and came over.

"Want a coffee, it's quite disgusting: I recommend it." He asked with a grin.

She nodded her head.

"No sugar." She looked around. "Who are all those people, not bin men surely?"

"No." Andy laughed. "We all start at the same time. Binnies, pickers, gardeners, tree guys, repairs, everyone. Don't worry; you'll get to know them."

"That's if I get the chance. I don't think Pops likes me."

"He prefers to reserve his judgement on newbies. Just do what he says and try your best, he appreciates enthusiasm, says that you can go a long way with it." He handed her a plastic cup of machine coffee. "Have you worked the back of a dustcart before?"

Emily shook her head.

"No, but I did get shown the basics last week at my induction."

Andy smiled.

"Come on then, I'll show you how we do it for real."

Andy spent ten minutes explaining and showing Emily how to load a bin. She looked at him with a puzzled expression.

"Why are you only loading one at a time? I've seen you guys before loading two at once."

"Because one at a time is all you need to know for starters, two comes with practice."

At this point Pops appeared.

"Are you two ready?" They both nodded. "Okay, this is the route we're taking." He gave them a list of numbered street names.

"This the route you think is best?" Andy said. "Looks good to me."

Emily just looked at the sheet of paper.

"I'm sorry; I don't recognise a lot of these names."

"That's okay for now. Just follow us. Ask if you're unsure." Pops smiled at her for the first time. Emily thought that it gave his face a whole new look. Maybe he wasn't such a grumpy old guy after all.

***

Emily has profoundly relieved after two and a half hours when Pops announced that they were full and it was time to tip and have a break. She was starting to flag a little. There was a lot more walking and scampering between bins than she had realised. She just hoped she wasn't going to let anyone down, herself included. One of the other rounds had phoned and said that their newbie had quit all ready, but Emily was determined to finish the day at least. She was sitting in the canteen on her own when Pops came in.

"You okay?" He asked, a hint of concern in his voice.

"Just wondering if my feet will wear out before my arms." She sighed.

"It gets easier, I promise. Your muscles get used to it."

She smiled weakly, and then asked.

"Where's Andy gone?"

"Up in the office with his girlfriend Admin Amy,"

"Oh." She looked Pops in the eye. "Truthfully, how am I doing?"

"Truthfully, not bad for a first timer. We'll find out a bit more this next load. It's Andy's turn to drive, so you'll have to carry the old man here." He grinned.

"I don't believe that for a moment." She laughed back. "I am doing okay though?"

"You're doing just fine kid. We've had a lot worse newbies than you, and some of them are still here."

"Thank you for that."

"All right, pep-talk over. Ready for some more work?"

"Just point me in the right direction and then tell me when to stop."

***

That first time loading with Pops really opened Emily's eyes. Although the older man didn't seem to move as fast as Andy had they quickly filled up the truck again. Pops just made it look so easy. He even found time to give a few pointers on how to move the bins more easily. On their second trip to the tip in the truck (Called 'Juliet' by Pops and Andy she found out.) Pops said he'd load the last trip too, much to Andy's apparent surprise. Later that evening, as she sank into a bath to ease her aching muscles, Emily thought back over what she had learnt in such a short time. Pops had seemed really pleased with her first days work. He had given her one last piece of advice about her hair, suggesting she wear it in a pony tail. When she'd asked why, he'd told her that it would keep it out of her eyes, especially when it rained. Now she thought about it, it made sense. She pulled her hair back to see how it would look. It made her look younger than she wanted. A thought struck her. She could wear that old baseball cap and pull the pony tail out through the back. That wouldn't look too bad!

***

What she didn't find out until much later was that Pops had gone into the manager's office after everyone had left to say that she would do, he wanted her on his crew. It had surprised the manager too, especially after Pops initial dubious acceptance of her and his usual reticence with newbies. Emily soon settled into her role in the crew, learning where the assisted collections were, where the truck would have to reverse, all sorts of little things which came easily to her two experienced team-mates. Her first test came when Andy had a couple of days leave. As she still hadn't been trained in helping to reverse the truck they had put another more experienced loader with her. He happened to be one of the people who thought that women couldn't be any good at the job. She hadn't exactly changed his mind, but she did manage to make him think he might be wrong in her case at least. This argument had been rumbling ever since she started. It came to a head after about two months, her most vehement critic spouting off in front of Pops one morning. By now Pops was fed up with the whole argument. Maybe some women wouldn't be any good at the job, but they hadn't applied. Emily had and she was damn good at it now.

"Ken, just shut up. If you think you can do better than Emily, we'll arrange a contest. We've got this 'Banksman' training at ten on Saturday. We'll all come in early, before nine, and we'll see who's the quickest. I've got an idea for a competition."

"How are you gonna do that?"

"Well, we have to use a truck to practise the reversing, so all we have to find is some empty bins..."

"Bottom of the yard."

"...And some space. Like an empty car park."

***

Emily wasn't too impressed when she heard about the challenge.

"Shouldn't I get a say in whether I accept this?" She asked Pops.

"Sorry Em." He said shamefaced. "But if you back out now, he'll win."

"He'll win anyway." She snapped. "I'm still not very quick with two bins, I can't steer them very well."

"Not necessarily." Andy said slowly. The other two looked at him. "Ken is not that quick, and we are more inventive." He grinned. Pops smiled.

Emily looked at the two of them.

"Okay. Care to let me in on this plan?"

"We just need to design a competition you can win Em."

***

It was a quarter past eight on Saturday and the three of them had just finished marking out the competition on the car park.

"That'll work." Andy said satisfied. "We just need to put the bins in place."

"Can you do that by yourself, at least for a while? I've got one last idea, but Emily will need to practise a couple of times at least, so we need to get down to the truck." Emily followed Pops down towards Juliet, which was the Dustcart they would be using for the challenge and the training.

"What is this 'idea' then Pops?" She asked as he climbed behind the wheel.

"It'll get you back in the cab quicker." He slid the driver's seat back as far as it would go, and then pushed the wheel as far forward as it would go. "There." He said. "Try that."

"Try what?"

"Getting in this side."

"But you're in the way." Emily was puzzled.

"You only have to be back in the cab, we don't specify where. Sit between my legs; I want to see if I can still move her." A light dawned for Emily. She hopped onto the step and then slid herself across over Pops right leg. "Hold it there." He said. "Okay, I think it'll work. Gears and handbrake, left hand: Gas and brake, right foot: Steering, right hand. I can look over your right shoulder, and you can pull the door shut." She did so. It was a bit of a squeeze, but it seemed it would work.

"Can I ask a question Pops?"

"Sure Em."

"Why do you care?"

"Why? Because you're the quickest learner of any newbie I've ever had. I don't see why they should look down on you because some bins are a bit heavy for you, or you can't throw a sack properly; some of the agency newbies can't do it either. You compensate in other ways. I mean, the little old ladies love you, so do most of the nippers. And you never give up. I like that in a workmate."

Emily giggled, squirming slightly.

"Em, don't do that." Pops said quietly.

"But your belt buckle is sticking in my back."

"Em, that's not my belt buckle." He blushed.

She went red as well.

"Oh! I think I'd better get out before... Sorry."

"Yes, well. I better get Juliet up to the challenge. Before everyone arrives."

***

"Okay, here are the ground rules. Every bin must be returned to its spot. You can do them in any order. The clock starts either when the truck moves, or the door is opened. It stops when the truck is back on its spot with the loader inside. Any questions?" Andy told the assembled crews. "Oh, one last thing. Emily goes last, so we know what she's got to beat. Ken, you can go when you like, as long as it's before Emily." Everyone nodded. The rules seemed simple but fair. "Who wants to go first?"

A couple of other loaders had a go before Ken, setting a reasonable time. Ken, despite a couple of fumbles, did a better time. One of the really quick loaders them did a time that would be hard to beat. Emily looked worried.

"Don't worry, you only have to beat Ken's time." Pops whispered. She nodded slowly. Andy looked around.

"No more takers? Okay Em, Pops, you're up."

Most of the other teams had gone to the back of the box and worked out; Pops went to the middle of the box. Emily dropped from the cab and went to the nearest bin. She worked the one on, one off, method that she used when on her own, working her way around the immobile Juliet. She was fast and accurate. The watchers thought they saw a flaw in her plan though; she would finish on the wrong side of the truck. As they were watching her, they didn't see Pops rearrange the driver's seat. Emily put the last bin on and ran towards the driver's door which Pops had opened for her. She slid in as they had practiced; shutting the door behind her as Pops dropped Juliet into gear and released the handbrake. The truck stopped back in the box to a cheer.

Emily sat in front of Pops breathing hard.

"You know, you're incredibly sexy when you're sweaty and panting." He whispered, kissing the back of her neck.

"Thanks." She gasped. "But. If you ever. Make me work. Like that on the round. I'll kick you so hard. Between the legs you'll have a new set of tonsils." The sentence came out in-between her panting breaths.

Pops laughed.

"I promise, now lets find out your time." He opened the door and let her out. "Well?" He asked.

Andy held up the stopwatch.

"Sorry Ken, she beat you by twelve seconds."

"The time she should have taken to get around the truck?" Ken smiled. "A great little move, but not one I'd like to try. All right Emily, I concede, you are definitely a binnie now." There was a small cheer and several backslaps. Emily shook his hand, basking in the admiration. She looked up at Pops, still sitting in Juliet and he winked at her.

***

After that Emily began to feel part of the team. Andy and Pops had always accepted her, but now the others did as well. There was no grumbling if she was switched onto another crew for a day or so as a banksman, except by Pops and Andy of course. Sunny summer days passed into rainy autumn and then cold winter, each bringing differing problems that she got over with Pops and Andy's advice. Soon the Christmas party was approaching. Emily wasn't sure she wanted to go until Pops saw her sitting looking thoughtful one morning break while Andy was off talking to Amy.

"Penny for them." He said, sitting opposite her.

"I was just wondering about the party."

"Me too." He sighed. "I don't always go and was thinking of giving it a miss this year but apparently we've won some award so we have to go."

"We're getting an award? Does that happen every year? People getting awards I mean." She was curious now.

"Usually. Not always serious ones. They mix them up. Are you bringing someone?"

"I wasn't sure I was going to go."

"Mandatory for our crew I'm afraid." He smiled. "So, going with someone?"

"You know I haven't got a boyfriend, or don't you listen when we're talking?" She gave him a mock stern look. "What about you?"

"And you know I don't have a girl." He gave her the stern look back. "Or don't you listen in the cab?" They both laughed. "Look, as it seems like we're both going to be on our own, should I pick you up and look out for you?"

"I have been to parties on my own before you know; I'm a big girl now."

"I have noticed, but you haven't been to one of our do's, sometimes they get a bit...rowdy." He looked at her strangely, in a way he hadn't before.

"If it would make you feel better..."

"It would."

"Then I'd be honoured for you to escort me to the Christmas party."

***

Pops knocked on Emily's door, still amazed that, in a roundabout way, he'd asked her to go out with him.

"Coming." She sang out. He fidgeted with the tie that he'd finally decided to wear as she came to the door. It swung open finally and revealed an Emily that he'd never seen before. She looked just stunning. Pops felt his jaw drop open. "What's the matter?" She asked.

"N...N...Nothing. It's just that... that I've never seen you out of uniform before. You look gorgeous Em, simply awesome."

"You're just saying that." She said blushing.

"You know I'm not." He tore his eyes away from the vision of beauty before him. "I will be honoured to escort you to the party and become the envy of everyone there because I'm with you."

"Pops, how come you don't have a girl when you can come out with things like that?"

"But I do have a girl, for one party at least." He smiled. "Come on, the cab is waiting."

***

The party was already under way by the time they arrived. Andy and Amy had got there before them and greeted them with drinks. After a while they all got up to dance, with Pops muttering that this was a bad idea. Emily and Andy both told him to stop moaning and enjoy himself for once to which he answered that he didn't need to dance to do that, but he got up to try anyway. They soon realised that he was right and let him sit down, leaving him in charge of going to the bar. When Emily and Pops had been there about an hour and a half, a halt was called to the music. It was time for the awards. The manager stood up and cleared his throat, nodding to a couple of the larger men who picked up Pops's chair, carrying it and him into the centre of the room. Emily joined in the laughter until she heard the first announcement.

"I think most of you are guessing that Pops is the winner of the first award tonight, but he isn't. The first award is to the fastest worker at the depot apparently, although I missed seeing the competition." Emily realised he was talking about her and tried to disappear. Andy and Amy grabbed a hand each and prevented her.

"You're not getting away that easily madam." Andy smiled.

"You're all wondering what this has to do with poor Pops sat there in the middle of the floor. Well we all decided that Emily should receive her award in the manner which she won it, on his lap! So please give Emily a big cheer!" There was a storm of applause and she was unceremoniously pushed towards where Pops was sitting uncomfortably. As she got closer she could see that he was grinning too. She had been going to perch on his knees but seeing his grin she decided to plonk herself right in his lap in a sudden spirit of devilment. He 'Ooofed' as she sat. The manager walked out and presented her with an engraved shield with her name and 'fastest worker challenge winner' on it. There was more cheering. Now she squirmed in embarrassment, muttering her thanks.

Pops whispered in her ear.

"Belt buckle."

Realising what he meant she went to stand.

"If you could wait just a moment Emily." The manager said, putting his hand on her shoulder and preventing her from rising. "There is another award for your crew. If Andy could come and join you."

"I don't have to sit on his lap too do I boss?" He joked as he strolled out to join them, getting a huge laugh.

"Sod off Andy." Pops said, slightly muffled by Emily's hair in his face.

"This award is for the crew with the least missed collections since the new rounds started, and even if we added in the ones that were missed because of roadworks, I'm afraid these three were miles better than the rest of you." He passed another shield to Emily. There was more cheering and a few good natured jeers along the lines of 'suck ups'!

"On behalf of my crew, thanks." Pops said. "Now can we get up, because my legs are going numb?" More jeering. 'Liar' and 'She's not that heavy' being the loudest. The manager let them stand, laughing. "You realise I'll get my own back." Pops said loudly but grinning as he said it.

***

The music restarted after the rest of the presentations and the bin men went back to dancing. Emily went to get some drinks, it was her round. Pops had disappeared when she came back.