Discovering, Accepting, Learning Ch. 01

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My life as a cocksucker.
2.6k words
4.62
78.7k
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Part 1 of the 2 part series

Updated 10/22/2022
Created 01/25/2014
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I discovered that I loved sucking cock in my very early 20's. I loved women, still do, in fact emotionally I can only be attracted to women, but there was something missing sexually. This was in the early 70's so porn was not a mouse click away like it is now. You either found an adult bookstore, not always easy to do, or you had the magazines like Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler. If you are old enough to remember those days you know that Penthouse had a letters section. Not always believable, but good for discovering new things from regular vanilla sex between a man and woman, to BDSM, to bi or gay, hell even incest. Pretty much any story was ok. I loved reading those letters and jacking off to all the possibilities they showed me.

When I first read some of the bi and gay stories I found myself very excited, which surprised me. It surprised me even more that I always imagined it was me that was the one giving pleasure to another man rather than the one receiving it. I became more and more obsessed with the thought of sucking a cock. The problem was in those days I had no idea how to go about doing it. I certainly could not let anyone I knew learn of these desires. I could not imagine how people would think of me if they knew that about me.

I was 22 and in Houston Texas waiting to catch a ship. I had been in the Merchant Marines for a year and this was where I was shipping out of. While waiting for the next available freighter or oil tanker that had a job opening I discovered that only a couple blocks from my hotel was an adult bookstore. I was amazed at the porn that was available there. No longer restricted to R rated porn, suddenly I was able to get hold of the real deal. XXX all the way.

I bought issues of gay porn, bi porn, dominance and submission porn, everything but regular sex that I could see, or do anywhere for that matter. I would take the mags back to my hotel room and read them and look at the photos of every kind of sexual activity I could imagine. But I always found myself cumming hardest while looking at photos of men sucking cock. And I always imagined that I was the one sucking the, dare I say, beautiful cocks that were in the photos. I was embarrassed by these feelings, but they grew stronger and stronger.

One day while looking at the racks of magazines at the porn shop I saw one that was for swingers in the local Houston area. I of course bought it and when I got back to my room started reading the ads. A very few were from single women, though to be honest they were worded in a way that it sounded like there would be money involved. A few more were from couples but they almost always were looking for women. The majority were from men, most seeking women, but about 3 in 10 from a man seeking another man.

Also, most of the ads had PO boxes to contact the people which would not work for me as I did not know when I would be shipping out and in the days when snail mail was the only mail I figured it would just take too long to contact anyone. But a few of the ads had phone numbers to call. I was pretty amazed that someone would have big enough balls to put their phone number in an ad that dealt with sex, but hey, maybe I would find one that interested me.

And of course I did. By far most of the men looking for men were looking to give and take with other man, a smaller group was only looking to service other men, and the fewest were from men who just wanted another man to suck their cock. Those were the ones that interested me. I didn't even consider looking for someone to suck me; I just had to find out what it would be like to suck cock.

Well there was one ad from a man that said he was 55 and looking for a younger man who wanted to become his cocksucker. My cock actually twitched when I read the word cocksucker. In all the times I had imagined sucking cock I had never considered that it would make me a cocksucker if I did, but for reasons beyond my understanding I wanted to be a cocksucker, even called a cocksucker. And as much as I could not believe it, the ad had a phone number.

Well as you might imagine I spent a couple days debating about calling it. I would tell myself that it was probably a disconnected number or that at 22 why would I want to suck the cock of a 55 year old man. Then I would think about finally feeling a cock slip between my lips and I would get myself right to the point of being ready to call but chicken out and just jack off thinking about it instead. Well one evening, about 7 PM I had swallowed just enough beer to pick up the phone and dial without thinking about it. Gotta love the bravery that alcohol can give.

The phone rang several times with me sweating like a fool and as I was just getting ready to hang up a man answered. "Hello." I didn't say anything for a few seconds and the man again said, "Hello."

"I'm calling about the ad." I finally had enough nerve to say expecting him to not know what I was talking about.

"What ad would that be?" he asked with what seemed like a chuckle.

I told him, with a nervous voice that I had seen an ad in whatever magazine it was and he chuckled again and asked. "Are you a cocksucker?"

I didn't know how to respond and just held the phone shaking against my ear and he asked again, "I said, are you a cocksucker?"

I took a deep breath and said "I want to be." and took several deep breaths waiting for his reply.

"How old are you?" he asked and I told him.

"You understand I have no interest in touching you, I just enjoy a boy sucking my cock. Are you ready to suck my cock and get nothing in return?" he asked.

I told him that was just what I was looking for and about how I had been curious about it a long time and just had to find out what it was like. He asked me if I was ready to swallow his cum and I didn't know what to say. I had never thought about it to the end, always cumming myself while just imagining the cock in my mouth, not what the result would be and once I came I had stopped thinking about it until the next time it popped up again.

In for a dollar in for a pound I guess and I said, "If that is what it takes then I guess I am ready to try."

"If you really are a cocksucker boy, then you will probably love my cum filling your mouth. Either way, if you start sucking my cock you are going to suck until I have dumped all my cum in your mouth." He was quiet for a minute and then asked, "Where are you?"

Before I could think about it I blurted out the hotel I was in. He said, "What room?" And again, without thinking about it I again blurted out the room number.

"I am about 5 miles away" he said, "I will be there in 15 minutes."

I was shocked. I don't know what I expected but I didn't expect it to happen this quick. I was quiet again and he finally said, "Boy, you called me remember. You want to be a cocksucker, I have a cock that needs to cum. I don't see any reason why you should call me if you weren't ready to take care of my needs. Do you boy?"

"No Sir." I said.

"Good. Be ready for me boy." He said as he hung up the phone.

I almost could not breathe. In 15 minutes and older man would be at my door and he was expecting me to suck his cock and swallow his cum. Was I ready to finally experience what I had been thinking about for so long? I didn't know, but I didn't see how I was going to get out of finding out. I suppose I could have just not answered the door when he knocked, but what would his reaction be? Would he make a scene? I didn't know. I was sweating like crazy thinking about it when there was a knock on the door.

Before I lost my nerve I opened the door and standing there was a man old enough to be my father. He was about 6'1, maybe 200 lbs. and had salt and pepper hair. I should say I am 5'10, 175 with red hair and a beard. He looked me up and down and said "Are you my cocksucker boy?"

My heart beat as I thought about the possibility of someone in the hall hearing what he said but I quickly replied "I want to be Sir."

He walked in past me and said as he stood in the middle of the room, near the end of the bed, "Well then why are you standing up, a cocksucker belongs on his knees."

I closed the door and kneeled down without even being aware I did. He laughed and said "You really are anxious boy. Tell me what you want to do."

I lowered my eyes and said quietly "I want to suck your cock Sir."

"And what do you want to become boy?" he said looking directly at me.

Still looking down I again said quietly "A cocksucker sir."

I could feel my own cock growing hard at the thought that this was really about to happen. He said more firmly "Look me in the eyes boy and tell me both those things again."

With my cock now fully erect and throbbing, I looked into his amused eyes and said "I want to suck your cock Sir and become a cocksucker."

"Then get over here and take care of business boy" he said with a chuckle.

I didn't even think about standing up. I didn't really think about anything at all. My mind was numb and I kind of wiggled over until I was kneeling in front of him, his crotch level with my face.

"Well boy, take down my pants and get busy."

Nervously I reached up and unbuckled his pants, undid them and slid them down his legs. He kicked off his shoes and stepped out of his pants and kicked them to the side. Now it was just boxers that were inches from my face and while his cock was not yet hard I could see it was much bigger than mine. I am average I guess, about 6 inches hard, but his looked to be that long and it wasn't erect. "Take down my shorts boy and meet the cock that is going to fill your mouth with cum."

My cock still throbbing and his words causing me to get even more excited I reached up and pulled down his shorts. And there in front of me was the only cock I had seen this close up. It was beautiful. Cut, surrounded by dark hair, low hanging and large balls, his cock swelled slightly as I stared at it. "Don't use your hands boy, just bend forward and give my cock a kiss. Show me that you are serious about being a cocksucker."

In a trance I did just as he asked. Feeling his cock against my lips was when I knew I had to suck his cock, had to suck any cock that would let me, had to be a cocksucker. I kissed it several times as it grew and unable to resist any more, my fantasy finally becoming real, I dipped down and took several inches of it into my mouth. He looked down and me and said "Well I guess you are a cocksucker boy. From now on, no matter what you do or where you go you can't take back that you had my cock in your mouth. You will be a cocksucker for the rest of your life even if you never suck another cock again."

It was true, I knew it. I was a cocksucker. I also knew this would not be the last cock I sucked. The feeling as my mouth slid down the length of his cock was intense. The feeling of his cock growing hard in my mouth was the sexiest thing I had ever felt. I knew I was where I belonged. I loved the feeling of his cock in my mouth. I loved his cock. I loved cock. My own cock was so hard it almost hurt and I did what cocksuckers do. I slid my mouth up and down his shaft, being careful to not let my teeth rub against it, using my tongue to massage it as my lips kept pressure against it.

"You are a natural boy," he said. "I am going to love filling your mouth with my cum"

I no longer doubted that I wanted to taste his cum. I no longer doubted that I wanted to be on my knees sucking cock. I no longer wondered if I would like sucking cock, I knew I did. I knew I would want to do this again. As my mouth worked up and down his hardness I could hear him moaning gently and knew I was doing a good job. I was doing what a cocksucker should do, make a man feel good, make a man cum.

"Get ready cocksucker, wont be long now and you will find out what a man's cum tastes like. And you better swallow it all boy, you got that?" he said.

I nodded as I continued to work his cock in and out of my mouth. I felt my hands reach up to cup his balls as my mouth worked faster and faster to bring him off. His cock suddenly felt even harder in my mouth and without warning he began shooting his cum into my mouth. The first shot surprised me but I kept my lips locked on his shaft and tried to swallow as fast as he was shooting his sperm into my mouth. Some leaked out the corner of my lips but I held his cock in my mouth until he started to soften. I didn't want it to end but he pulled out and said "That's enough boy, it gets sensitive after I cum, now lick up all that cum leaking out of your cocksucking mouth."

So help me I did. I loved his cum. I loved showing him that I was indeed his cocksucker and did what a cocksucker is supposed to do. I used my fingers to wipe up the cum dripping down my cheeks and chin and sucked my fingers clean.

Still kneeling there I realized I had cum too. When his cum was shooting into my mouth I had exploded in my pants. I had never felt so right. On my knees with a real man using me as his cocksucker. It was just where I belonged.

"Well boy, when I got here you wanted to be a cocksucker. Tell me, what are you now?"

"I am a cocksucker Sir." I said. "Thank you!"

He was still chuckling as he dressed and left me there, still on my knees, thinking about what I had done and what I now was.

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avidcockloveravidcocklover4 months ago

I know the feeling I loved my 1st time and I love worshiping cock with my warm wet hungry mouth, I am a cock sucker!

pantylvr2pantylvr24 months ago

Wow! I loved it. I wish my first time sucking a hard cock was that hot but I did manage to swallow every drop

cynthia0920cynthia0920about 1 year ago

The first blow job I gave was on a male escort at a San Francisco airport hotel, when I was there for business.

I had finally reached the stage where I knew I needed to do it to try to get the curiosity out of my system.

I found one I liked and like the hero in this story, I called him and "I told him that was just what I was looking for and about how I had been curious about it a long time and just had to find out what it was like. "

Unlike the man in this story, He didn't shove it in my face telling me that I would be a cock sucker and ask if I was ready to swallow his cum because I would need to. He was polite and said he could help me out and that I wasn't the first married with children guy that had these curiosity feeling and he's be right over.

He did however, take an assertive role and had me take his pants off as I sat on the ottoman with him standing in front of me. He did "order" me to take his cock out of his boxers and hold it and squeeze it and stroke it. He did direct me to take his boxers off and fondle his balls and mild his cock inches from my face. And when the first drop of pre-cum emerged he told me to lick it and taste it, then he told me to wet my lips and kiss his cock head and run my tongue over it.

It wasn't until he allowed me to slide it in my mouth and after I began to bob my head up and down on it did he shock me by saying it. You know your a cock sucker now, and almost exactly like the man in the story, he said, whether I never suck another cock it'll never take away the fact that I am now a cock sucker.

It shocked me, I never thought that someone would call me that and that I would be a cock sucker for doing this, I stopped sucking for an instant but then in my mind I knew he was right. That's when he dropped the other bomb on me and said, get back to sucking faggot, and I did.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 2 years ago

I became a cocksucker at a. VERY young age, I was lured into the dark woods near the county fair by a gentleman whose cock I had seen in the public urinal. His penis was massive and I was fascinated by it. He told me to follow him along a trail, then behind a huge rock. He pulled it out and I almost fainted it was so beautiful. Fat throbbing veins. Perfect purple cock head. Large hanging balls. Curved and erect slapping his 6 pack belly. Copious clear pre cum drooling from the end. He was stroking it and I was on my knees, lapping up his flowing juices, tongueing his massive balls. Then, his cock was in my mouth, hot and insistent. He was groaning, and saying what a great little cocksucker I was. This went on for about 10 minutes. He took my head in his hands and started to face fuck me, gently. I was swirling my tongue around his cock head. The pre cum was delicious. Salty and a little sweet. He said he was gonna cum. It was gonna be a lot. I should swallow it all, and not lose any. I was to get ALL of it. His cock started to throb and get bigger, then he started shooting hot cum on my tongue, down my throat, filling my mouth completely. I began swallowing and didn't stop gulping for a good 3-4 minutes. It was a lot of. cum. I didn't know that, being my first time, I had no comparison. But later on life I realized that was the biggest load I ever swallowed. I swished it around in my mouth as I swallowed. I liked it. I loved it. I got up and went back to the fair, savoring all that cum I'd swallowed the rest of the. day. It coated my tongue, my mouth, my throat. I was so young, but I was already in love with cock, and have been for 60 years.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 2 years ago

Super hot. All that hard cock. All that hot cum!

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