Dominant Memoirs Ch. 00: Introduction

This is an introduction to my life as a Dominant, and tells how I got started as a Dominant and about the wife of the Dominant who mentored me.

Siobhán was my oldest submissive. She turned 70 last June (2014)

Siobhán is someone I am very close to. Her husband, Michael, made me what I am, in the early 2000's. He was a Dominant and in our working lives, he was my boss - this is how I came to know him. He and I became good friends - in many ways, he was like an uncle to me. He mentored me at work, and in my personal life, he mentored me also.

Michael took me into his confidence one night when we were talking about women. I was telling him how unsatisfied I was with the women I met, and how frustrated I was - I explained to him that I wanted to sexually control women in a way that did not hurt them, and in a way that they wanted to be controlled and that any woman I had been with had not wanted this.

Michael told me about his sexual practises, with his wife, and with other women. He explained that he was a dominant. He offered to explain to me in depth and to show me.

And he really did show me. He introduced me to his wife Siobhán and they took me under their wing. Although they were married and they had a grown family, Siobhán was also his submissive. They also introduced me to other submissives and taught me how to dominate them in a kind and caring manner, in a way that was just as enjoyable for them as it was for me - safe words, how to inflict pain without causing harm, how to be engage in BDSM safely. I quickly found what I had been missing from my life - a need to dominate, but in a way that did not put women off.

Siobhán also took me as her lover during this time. I was still in my 20s and she was much older - in her late 50's. Of course Michael knew and actively encouraged it. Siobhán taught me about women and sexuality and how they like to be pleasured. Things I already knew about but things that I also needed more experience of were what she taught me most about. The g-spot, the clitoris, the wonders of cunnilingus - all these things I learned from Siobhán. She also taught me how to be inside a woman and hold on before an orgasm. The most important thing that she taught me was how wonderful women are, and how much they should be worshipped and cared for - especially by Dominant men. Siobhán taught me a lot, both about women, and about sexuality.

After my training, I found out there was a developed "scene" in existence via Nimhneach and the like - but nobody in the circles I was in would ever go there. They value their privacy - in some cases, there would be public attention if it was made known that some of this circle were doing what they do in a more public setting.

When Michael died, Siobhán was devastated. She had lost her soulmate. I offered her emotional support and friendship. Eventually, she became my submissive.

Siobhán's submission took the form of an extreme form of masochism. She was so sexually aroused by the pain caused by firm bare-bottom spanking and also by use of the strap and a hard 12 stroke caning that she had multiple orgasms and squirted when she masturbated or when a vibrator was applied to her clitoris immediately after the spanking.

This is how and why she submitted to her husband, and how she submitted to me. The why is somewhat more complicated - she had not had a lover since Michael and did not want one, despite the fact that we had been lovers years earlier. But she did want sexual satisfaction and the orgasms she used to have. So I dominated her, she submitted, and she had her orgasms.

In the last few months of our D/s relationship, both Siobhán and I noticed that her sexual responses were not what they were. She had fewer multiple orgasms and was not as able for hard impacts. Siobhán was getting older, and her sexual drive and physical health were not what they used to be. She told me, after some consideration, that she had decided she would be stopping her BDSM practises altogether once she turned 70.

Our final sessions were filmed for both our posterities. We were hooded to protect our identities, but our sessions continued as normal aside from that. They will never be shared, but we both have them to remember our times together.

I will always remember never wanting them to start, because I knew it meant that they would soon stop for good.

I have moved on now, but I still miss Siobhán very much.