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Bob drove through the streets that were becoming busy with the cars and buses taking people to their work. Encountering red lights when he wanted green. Kids and adults stepping into the road and running out on to the crossings without looking. The quiet breathing from Tom as he dozed in the comforting seat. Eventually they pulled up at the main entrance to Queen's View Residential Home.
Bob jumped out, strode round his car, and opened the door for Tom. Helping him out, and pointing him towards the entrance. "If you go in I'll park the car and then come in and find you. Ok Tom?" Bob slid back into his car, zoomed round the car park and into a space.
Walking through the revolving doors into the reception area, Bob looked around for Tom.
"May I help you?" A grey haired lady, who would have fitted under Bob's arm, approached him.
"I just brought one of your residents home. Mr Finney."
"Tom Finney?"
"We met early this morning on the hill overlooking the cemetery. He was telling me about his wife dying last year on their wedding anniversary. That today would have been their golden wedding."
The grey haired lady looked confused. "It would have been their 50th anniversary today but Mrs Finney actually died two years ago. Tom used to be a resident but he died on this day last year."
Bob's head was buzzing with questions. He opened his mouth, realised anything he said would be even more unbelievable, and shut it again. Turning to leave, he stopped in mid stride, and asked himself out loud. "So who did I just bring here? Who have I been talking with for the last three hours?"
He turned back to the nurse, but she shrugged her shoulders. She shook her head, and watched him walk back through the doors and out into the sunshine.
- COMMENTS
SyptemberSmythalmost 6 years agoThis was a very romantic and touching story. I see you're having fun with creating unexpected endings. I think in this case it certainly added to the story.
-Syptember
Emirusalmost 6 years agoAuthorFirstly let me thank you for taking the time to read my story and obviously spending some considerable time on writing your comment. Far better than reading a comment saying “the wording of your first paragraph sucks.” You know then the writer has given you a one star.
What did you think of the story itself, please? I ask this because, with this being only my third story, I accept that grammatical mistakes will occur. Although there are now considerably less than initially. But I am also interested in how much, hopefully, the story has been enjoyed.
When I read a story the first question I ask myself is “did I enjoy it?” The second question is “were their any errors?” I’ve occasionally picked up on bad grammar, punctuation etc by writers much better and more experienced than myself. The third question is “did these errors make the story any less enjoyable?” After taking the answers into consideration I respond. Even if it’s just to myself rather than in print.
Any writer who does not turn off the comments has to accept constructive criticism. It would have to be exceptional circumstances for me to switch off comments or even delete a constructive piece of advice.
