Eternal Love

I just got home from the office and I set my things down: Heavy briefcase, umbrella, and a coffee mug that says, "Greatest Boss."

I look around and realize that a two story house is too big for one person. There are so many places to be, but nowhere to escape.

Everywhere is the same: Somber. He's gone.

It's been two months since I received the letter. A car pulled up and a tall man in uniform walked up to my door. How dare he! How dare he hand me that. How dare he!

I cry. I'm crying now. And always will I cry. Still, even as I stand here, I imagine he is with me. He never truly left me, right? But, all I can hear are the tears of the gray sky behind me. Are they his tears?! He misses me too. I know it.

I finally shut the door. I slip off my shoes on to the rug and begin the climb up the stairs. The king sized bed is made perfectly on his side. Not another man shall ever share it with me. I promise this.

I strip down to nothing but my bra and panties. I reach for the nightgown that he had bought me. I plan to make dinner. But all I can do is hold the gown against my barely beating heart. It should cease. I love him. I am nothing without him. Nothing.

I stand here for a moment. I shall skip dinner. All I want is a drink: Something, anything to numb the pain. I walk down the stairs with a death grip on the gown and into the kitchen. Slowly, I open the refrigerator. The cool air feels so welcoming. I look around and fumble through the bottles: Whisky, Vodka, Bailey's Irish Cream, and Wine. I like the idea of a smooth milkshake topped with Bailey's. Yes. Perfect. I sip from the bottle and the liquid dances in my mouth filling me with insatiable desire.

I pull out some French Vanilla ice cream, scoop it into the blender and pour the Bailey's on top; smooth, sensual and calming. I take a spoon and taste the mixture. It's so palatable, but it's too thick for my liking and it's not strong enough to make me sleep. I turn to the cabinet behind me, open it and fumble through more bottles. I pour a little more into the shake and taste the thinned mixture; perfect. I walk back up the stairs into my room and drink it quickly. I cannot wait.

I sit on my bed looking into the full length mirror and wait a few minutes and feel the mixture take effect. Then, I cry. God I miss him; his touch, his voice. I need to be with him: Wherever he may be.

I close my eyes and open them again. The vision is blurry, but through the mirror I swear I see his body; naked, hard, ready. He's ready for me. I lay down. And I hear him whisper, "Close your eyes." I do. I know he can't be here. I become dizzy, but I do not open my eyes. I feel too good. He feels too good. I rub my breasts and whisper his name. My hands are everywhere. His hands are everywhere. Still, I cry. I reach down to feel myself; wet. I cannot control it anymore. I need release.

I play with myself and begin to moan. He speaks to me.

"Slow down. Enjoy."

"I need you. I-I need to be closer to you."

I squeeze my nipples and let out a soft cry. It feels like he is here. He's not gone from me. He's touching me: Playing with me and kissing my neck, lips, and cheek. I rock up and down. I feel it coming. I cannot breathe and my eyes are heavy.

I feel him inside of me now. I throw my hands above my head and he pushes and pulls in and out of me. I can't open my eyes. I can't see him. But I can hear him. Telling me he loves me. How much he needs me and that he's going to come inside of me. He wants me. He's calling me to him. I can feel it coming now...he calls me...

"Come for me, my love."

I am ready for the suffering to be over.

"I want to be with you forever."

I struggle to breathe. My eyes won't open.

"Come to me," he whispers.

"I'm coming! I'm coming! I-"

By Dien