Factors of Change Ch. 04

He laughed softly and shook his head. "Lili..." He hesitated a moment, and shook his head. "You can feel it, though, non? What does your wolf say?"

I stared at him for a moment before shutting my eyes. What do you say? I called to her, even though I already knew. All week, every thought she got through to me was about Gabriel, about impressing him, about getting close to him. About wanting him. Taking him. My wolf, obviously excited about this impromptu consultation, pushed and probed my mind, but I hastily shoved her back as I usually did and opened my eyes, unwilling to give her control. "Yes, I feel it," I breathed as I met his gaze. "She wants you." I gave him a small smile. "Quite badly."

He smiled. "She knows what is good for you. Do you not trust her?"

No. It was the only answer that I could think of, and it threw me off as I realized I couldn't really say it out loud. No, I did not trust her. I liked her enough; I liked her company and her energy, and I liked her beauty. I liked how she could run like the wind and make me feel more freedom than I ever could in my human form. I liked her counseling, in a certain measure, and having her in my mind had given me a lot of confidence over the years. But letting her take control of my heart? Letting her decide how I would live my life? No. I did not trust her with that. She was a part of my mind, but she wasn't me. I knew how wrong that was: all Weres trusted their wolf. But mine had been forced upon me, and no one had ever thought of showing me how to deal with that, with her presence in my mind, with her influence on my life. I had done that on my own.

I wasn't sure how much of my thoughts showed on my face, but Gabriel had been watching me closely, his eyes slowly narrowing in a thoughtful manner. "Leah," he slowly said, and I realized I still hadn't even given him an answer. "Who Turned you?"

I stared at him, frozen like a deer in headlights, my mind racing as I broke into a cold sweat. This is it, I thought frantically. He's a smart man; of course he's figured it out. This is the moment where it ends. What will he say? "I... I don't know," I finally let out in a breath, keeping my gaze locked to his as I waited for the heartbreak.

His eyebrows shot up in surprise, and his lips parted. "You..." he started hesitantly, but sudden loud footsteps in the hallway interrupted him.

"Gabriel," a tall, breathless man said, stopping in the doorframe. Gabriel turned around and gave him a dark look.

"Tom. Can you please wait two minutes?" he said tersely.

The man shook his head, an agitated look on his face. "Sorry. Old MacKenzie just disappeared. His mate's been looking for him since yesterday, she just called here." He held up the wireless receiver and suddenly tossed it to Gabriel, who held out his hand in reflex and adroitly caught it. "She's waiting for your call."

Gabriel looked down at the receiver, his lips pressed tightly into a worried frown. He made up his mind quickly, though, and nodded. "Merci, Tom. Round up the Six in the study. All but Cedric, he is already on his way back into town." The man named Tom nodded briefly and, after an intensely curious look and a polite nod in my direction, turned around and hurried back where he came from.

I avoided looking at Gabriel's face. I had placed my hands against the granite counter behind me, gripping the hard edge tightly enough to hurt. I had no idea who Old McKenzie was, or who exactly the mysterious Six were, but I couldn't help but wish Tom had come in with the news a few minutes earlier and stopped this disastrous conversation in time. I felt Gabriel turn his head to look down at me. "I have to take care of this," he said in an even tone. "What were you planning to do?"

"This sounds like it could take some time," I said, keeping my eyes on his feet. I only noticed then that he was wearing jeans and sneakers - quite a change from the business attire I had only seen him in until then. "I think... I'll just head home."

"Leah," he sighed. He stepped closer to me, moving close enough that I had no choice but to look up at him. His expression surprised me. He looked concerned and confused, but his handsome features held none of the disgust I had been used to for my whole Were life. "I will call you tonight. Leah... Everything will be alright."

No, it won't. Stop saying that, I thought disbelievingly. I nodded mutely and moved back to walk away, but he suddenly caught my arm and pulled me back to him. I looked up at him in surprise as he leaned down to kiss me passionately. His lips moved against my mouth and I gave in with a moan, parting my lips to let his tongue dance against mine. Our kiss continued with him not letting me pull back, until he had stripped my concerns one by one with nothing more than his lips and devilish tongue. I was feeling more than a little light headed when he finally released me with a soft gasp.

"Never doubt me," he whispered fervently against my lips. I shook my head slightly, and he kissed me again, much gentler. "Be careful." I simply nodded, at a complete loss for words, and watched him turn around to walk out, leaving me alone in the empty kitchen with my racing thoughts and my thundering heart.

Well. Now he knew that I had no idea who it was that had bitten me. Chances were he would easily figure out that it hadn't been consensual and that I had been Turned into a werewolf against my will. And then what would he do about it?

Never doubt me, he had said. He had meant it, wanted me to trust him.

And I really wanted to try.