Feeling Normal Ch. 01

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22-year-old college student with HIV finds love interest.
1.4k words
4.47
6.9k
7

Part 1 of the 4 part series

Updated 06/08/2023
Created 11/26/2017
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Ty3958
Ty3958
6 Followers

It had only been a little over a year since I had been diagnosed with HIV. I had been completely devastated by the diagnosis; I had never slept with anyone and I felt that I never would now. I'm still perplexed as to how none of the doctors I had ever been to saw it in 22 years. My mother, whom I got my HIV from through birth, had been dealing with her diagnosis for years and she had been trying to help me come to terms with mine but it never seemed to get easier.

I continued with my studies and just tried to forget about it with no hope. I was always a loner but this just made me more detached from society; I was afraid of getting close to anyone, friend or otherwise, and them leaving. It seemed like I was trying to push my way through a dense fog that just got thicker with each passing day. Being a young guy, I of course wanted to be intimate, but how could I. I felt like the most disgusting thing on the planet. I tried going out and meeting people but nothing ever panned out; I would always get nervous and chicken out.

On a warm October night I laid in my bed slowly caressing my naked body and tugging on my rigid member. I am not the greatest looking guy; I am 5'4, with a plump body and thick thighs, caramel colored skin, raven hair, dark brown eyes, and a cute face if I do say so myself. However, I don't have the greatest body image. Anyway, I just laid on my bed and stroked myself to orgasm, cleaned myself up, and slowly drifted off to sleep. I woke up the next day, ready to face the world as best I could. It was the weekend, so I decided to go mall walking and maybe buy a few things that caught my fancy.

I was perusing the makeup aisles of Ulta- I'm a bit of a femboy with a weakness for lipstick and nail polish, when I noticed a guy that I had seen at Macys, and again at the food court. He was holding cologne in his hand, but I kept catching him looking at me from the corner of his eye; suffice it to say, he was creeping me the fuck out. I put what I had in my hand back and fast walked my ass the hell out of the store. I went into a bunch of different stores with the intention of losing him, but this creeper was persistent.

I finally managed to lose him and luckily I was in a store that I actually wanted to go to that day. Just as I started to look around, I felt someone approach; there he was, standing no more than a foot beside me. I started to sweat, my heart started to race, and my stomach started to twist into knots as I became nauseous. I didn't know whether to run, ignore him, or confront him when suddenly he spoke, "That's a great movie! Seen it twice! Has some great acting!" All I could manage to do was smile and nod.

It was only at that moment that I had gotten a good look at him, he at least 6'0, 250- maybe a little more, at least 25, short, dark brown hair, a kempt beard, with thick, brown hair covering his forearms and piercing green eyes. I would have been more turned on if I weren't so terrified by the fact that he was following me. He spoke again, "My name is Ethan," he shoved his hand out for a shake. I slowly put a weak grip around his big, rough hand and shook it, " H- h- hi, I'm Erin," I winced at the saying of my own name as I had always hated that my mom chose to give me the female spelling of Aaron, but I quickly shook that thought from my head.

"I'm sorry if I scared you by following you around the mall, I just had to meet you. I was just thinking about why such cute guy was all alone." My face turned hot at his words but my nerves wouldn't let me keep eye contact very long. He spoke again, "So you like to wear lipstick, that's cool!; I bet those lips look great in red!" I was melting away with each word and I finally worked up the courage to speak, "They do, but I don't wear lipstick all the time." He moved in close and spoke softly, "I would love to see that sometime."

He asked me if I wanted to get a bite to eat at the food court to which I begrudgingly agreed to; I don't like people watching me eat! He told me to get whatever I wanted, but I settled for a small salad and the hunger that would come afterward.

"So what do you do?" I asked just to break the ice. "I'm part owner of a construction company, and you?"

"I am in-between jobs at the moment; I'm more focused on school right now," I hated telling people that because it made me feel like a bum.

"That's cool! You know, if school is important to you! I never really was the greatest at school but I did okay! So what do you like to do for fun?"

"I- um... I like to do a lot of things," I said this with a voice that was so faint you could barely hear me.

He tried to make me feel more at ease, "Hey, you don't have to be nervous! I'm not going to hurt you! Come on, just talk to me."

I took a deep breath and slowly started a conversation with him. The conversation lasted for quite a long time and I opened up so much; more than I ever had with anyone else. Before I knew it, we had talked for 3 hours; I freaked when I realized the time. "Oh, fuck! God Damn it!" Suddenly his face turned from soft and sweet into one of seriousness and concern, "What's wrong? What happened? Is everything okay?" Trying not to be rude, I answered him in the most polite voice I could muster, "No! It's just... I took the bus here and I just missed the last one! Shit!"

With a soft voice and a face that was hopeful for the response he wanted to hear, he spoke, "I could drive you! I mean, only if you wanted a ride. Do you... want a ride?"

I tossed the idea around my head for a bit before giving in and agreeing to let him take me home, "Yeah... sure! That would be great!" The biggest smile spread across his face as I assumed that was the response he was hoping for. We made our way to his truck, hoped in, I told him my address, and we were off.

About 15 minutes later we arrived at my house. I thanked him as I unbuckled my seat belt, "Thanks again! You are a life saver! I had no freaking clue how I was getting home!"

"No problem! Anytime! ummmm... by the... I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime! You know, like on a real date?"

I was bit shocked by this request but in a delightful way, "Yeah! That would be great! ummm... here's my number! You can text or call anytime to set it up!" I held out my hand in which he placed his cell, then I called my number so he had it in his phone.

"Great! Awesome! I will definitely be calling!" As I started to get out of the truck, he reached over and wrapped his hand around the back of my neck and pulled me in for a deep kiss. Not expecting this, I placed both hands on his chest. I felt his tongue swipe across my bottom lip but he never put his tongue in my mouth. The kiss was only about a minute long but it felt like eternity. As he pulled away, he kept his hand on the back of my neck and rubbed my cheek with his thumb, "Mmmm... I knew those lips tasted sweet!" I could only manage to swallow hard when he spoke again, "I'm gonna call you tomorrow, sweet boy!"

I managed to make my way through the front door with my weak knees. A few seconds after the door closed, I heard his truck take off. I ran to my bedroom and masturbated with fervor. In my hazy, spent stupor, a realization smacked me like a shovel to the face; how am I going to tell him about my positive status.

Ty3958
Ty3958
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4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
representation matters!

fist up!

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago
Positive...steps

Something tells me that Ethan could be a real life-saver in ways beyond offering a ride home. He seems genuinely concerned and interested enough to talk for three hours with Erin, and who knows what can happen. Let them take it slowly, and both could be very pleasantly surprised! Keep writing!

AnonymousAnonymousover 6 years ago

This is so fucking good i relate to this so much and its so important to see people with hiv represented just living their lives instead of being forgotte. Love love love this <3

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