Fire on the Mountain

My first time at bat. This demented little tale is a loose tribute to Papatoad's Pyro Petey, which was delightful to me in twisted sort of way.

*****

My name is Nick Weston. I was perfectly ordinary in every way. Well, I guess I would be considered a little on the short and scrawny side. My unspoken motto my entire life has been, make no waves. My life was quiet, average, and perfect for me. I didn't make very much money but I managed it as best as I could. I had a good job, even if it didn't make for exciting anecdotes at parties. I've dated a few women, even fewer seriously, and married one.

Landing Kelly as my wife was the only time I had ever felt special. Don't get me wrong, I didn't have a problem with my live and let live philosophy. Far from it. But even I could I admit it feels good to win the championship. Earn the trophy. That's how I reacted to marrying Kelly, and after our years together she still made me feel like a relationship gold medalist. Well, minus a few weeks.

Now, I should make one thing clear, since I apparently didn't before now and that's why I found my life taking the turn it did. But just because I firmly believed in not looking for trouble doesn't mean I'm a pushover. At least I thought so. Others obviously considered me one. Why did everyone think something different than me? Yeah, I'm not exactly imposing but still. Truthfully, in my entire life push never came to shove. I just did what I could to get by without causing trouble and no one ever saw need to come at me. I told myself though I would never bend over and take it if it ever did.

The particular serpent that came into my garden was another employee at my company, Jack Knowles. While I was in the climate-controlled white collar side of the house he worked in shipping and receiving. He was everything I was not. Tall, built, ruggedly handsome (I guess), and entirely self-absorbed. From the little I'd gathered in the years we have been employed at the same place he was once a somebody in college sports or something. Those days were over but he had worked to maintain his physique, as well as his demeanor. According to Jack his nickname on his old team was "The Mountain".

Have you ever been in the situation where you are the only one not buying someone's line of bullshit? Like you're wearing the glasses from the movie They Live only it detects douchebags. Everyone at our company, men and women, seemed to hang on Jack's every word. People laughed at his dumb jokes, the guys would gather around to egg him on as he would brag about his sexual exploits in not so hushed words, he shamelessly flirted with all the attractive women in the office whether they were married or not. Plus, he apparently could take long lunches and early days on a whim without fear of reprisal from management. You get the idea. Anyways, all that time I would ask myself how every single one of these normally intelligent people could fall under a spell like that. God, some of the guys even called him The Mountain occasionally.

Now, this kind of thing was irritating, sure. But I don't want to give the impression that I dwelled on it. It was just an observation. I kept to myself, did my job, and got home to Kelly. Jack and I never had to cross paths at work so I kept my mouth shut. Didn't want to make waves after all. Which is why I don't understand why Jack decided to set his sights on me. Maybe he could tell I wasn't suitably impressed with him for his liking. Maybe I fit the bill for the classic bully/bullied relationship. But target me he did.

It started small. Little stuff that can just be guys giving each other a hard time. Cracks about my size and stuff. It would be a rare occasion where I would have to go down to the loading dock for documentation and he we ask if I needed him to reach them off of the top of the desk for me or something like that. His entourage would laugh and I would chuckle to play along and let it roll off my back.

For whatever reason Jack Knowles decided Nick Weston was his new source of amusement at work. It didn't take long before I became "Little Nicky". Yes, the moniker had been used on me from time to time in my youth. Whatever. But now that was how I was addressed in a place of business filled with professional adults, sometimes in the presence of superiors. I could practically feel the disdain for me grow in my office, like I subconsciously knew from what everyone thought of me that I had seen my last promotion with the company.

Don't worry about it. It's just a guy having fun. No harm done. Don't make trouble. You're imagining things.

Looking back now I know my usual tactic was actually working against me. But it was a lifelong learned trait that couldn't be overcome just like that. Besides, I figured if I confront him with it he would laugh it off and slap me on the shoulder saying he was just kidding around. If I felt perturbed enough to file a complaint it was doubtful anything would happen to the golden boy. I would probably end up losing ground when my coworkers turned on me for upsetting the applecart. Knowles doesn't mean any harm. He's just lightening up the mood.

Don't forget, whether you think I was deluding myself or not, that I still didn't believe I was a pushover. I was convinced that whatever threshold I had before I acted hadn't been crossed yet. Perhaps in retrospect I was partially responsible for the events that were to come by fostering an environment where seeds could take root.

This had been going on for a few months when Jack decided to escalate matters. A packet of important paperwork came in for me from another office. Jack had noticed my name on the package as he passed the mail cart and decided to express deliver it himself.

"Think fast Nicky! Special delivery!"

That was all the warning I had before the stuffed manila envelope crashed onto my desk. As it spun to a stop it knocked a folding double picture frame onto the floor. The two pictures it contained were my wedding photo with Kelly and her posing on a beach in a tasteful bikini from our last vacation. Since I was behind my desk and Jack had tossed the package in midstride into my office he was much faster in recovering the fallen picture frame.

"Hey, Nicky sorry about that." Jack said with a shit-eating grin on his face in a tone of both insincerity and condescension. As he stood up straight with the pictures in hand I made the most aggressive gesture towards him I ever had up to that point as I attempted to snatch them out of his hand. Jack easily evaded the swipe though and turned them to look.

He looked my wife up and down with an approving smirk, "Hey, not bad Little Nicky. Can't imagine how you manage to hold on to her."

Since this time it was just the two of us, I could sense considerably less levity and more genuine disdain in his tone. Likewise, no forced smile was forthcoming from me. After what was entirely too long of a time to eyeball another man's wife he casually tossed the double frame on top of the package and turned to leave.

"Send that mustang to me to get her broken in a bit. A wild one like that is likely to throw you off sooner or later. Hell, I'd be doing you a favor." He nonchalantly called over his shoulder.

For what felt like the first time ever, something somewhere inside me began to strain.

___

After that, however, nothing really came of it. In fact, things between Jack and me were as quiet as before all this started again. Too quiet, I should have been thinking but I was content to let my guard down and believe that my personal philosophy had weathered this storm and I could resume sailing again.

It was soon after that the annual company summer picnic took place.

I had just pulled into a parking spot and was looking over at Kelly doing one final check on her hair and makeup in the visor mirror. It was one of those little moments you fall in love with someone all over again. I was sitting there counting my blessings as I gazed upon my vision of a wife when she noticed I was dreamily staring at her.

"What's on your mind, hmmm? Do I even want to know?" she asked.

"I was just thinking we're due for another vacation."

"Oh really. Is that all?

"Mmm-hmm," I replied, maybe deep-down thinking about that day in my office, "Someplace warm and sunny with a beach. Maybe get you a new bikini. Maybe even go somewhere where you won't need it."

"Ha ha. You wish!" she gave me a playful swat on the arm, "Come on, you."

With that she got out of the car and I followed. My good mood was not to last.

Jack "The Mountain" Knowles was fashionably late, but that didn't stop him from holding court. He had a steady group of people around him at all times, laughing at whatever shit he was saying. I was doing a good job of keeping Kelly and I at a comfortable distance while we ate barbeque and mingled. I did notice, however, that my wife stole the occasional glance at the knot of people and was obviously curious at what was going on.

My luck was bound to run out. Jack had, of course, stationed himself in the vicinity of the beverages and we had to refill at some point. I did my best to get our drinks and be in and out, noticing a certain reluctance on Kelly's part to leave the drink area, and was almost home free when he noticed me.

"Hey, Little Nicky!" He yelled out, stopping us in our tracks, "Does your mother know you're sneaking beers?"

There was an immediate burst of laughter from our colleagues that were around us, plus some from guests that didn't know either of us before today. I mean, come on, that wasn't even a good joke people.

"Come on now." He said while coming towards us so our size difference was glaringly obvious, "I'm gonna have to see some ID before I let you have that."

There was another bout of laughter, but I barely registered it from the others. The reason why was because this time there was an addition to the laughter. My wife's. The crystalline, angelic sound I practically lived for was now as jarring as a beginner trying to play the clarinet. I involuntarily stole a glance at her. I was also not the only one to catch the sound. Although I am sure he had looking at the modest cleavage of her summer dress more than me up to this point, Jack did a masterful job of pretending to notice Kelly for the first time.

"Well hi there. I know you. You're the beautiful woman with excellent taste in swimwear." He flashed a lop-sided grin at her.

"I beg your pardon!" She replied. Her tone revealed her surprise at his audacity, but was suspiciously short of anger. In fact, a hint of a smile played across her lips. A tiny needle in my heart.

"Yeah, Nicky here loves to show you off to the guys. Shows everyone a picture of your rocking body. I must say the picture doesn't do you justice."

"He does, does he?" Now her voice contained a touch of anger, but it wasn't directed at Jack. Her irritation based on his little white lie was nothing compared to the tempest that now flared within me, though. I will admit more than a little annoyance that she seemed to immediately believe the lie from someone she had never met, especially since it was 180 degrees out from what I would do. Indeed, any number of people there knew that unless they had ever personally been behind my desk they hadn't seen that picture. But not one single soul called him on his bullshit, and it would have only come across as phony, whiny and self-serving if I had denied it. I was trapped.

But Jack Knowles was still the primary focus of my rage. My face immediately flushed in a mixture of fury and humiliation so it looked like I had a six-hour sunburn. This jackass couldn't count all of his fingers and toes without a calculator, yet he just manipulated everyone around him. Including my wife and, by extension, myself. I still had those glasses on. How can no one other than me see him for what he is?! Now his eyes were glued on her. He was checking Kelly out and not inconspicuously. His body language suggested I wasn't even there, but his words were meant for both of us.

"I'd like to take you out sometime. That is, if you can ever get out of babysitting."

There was more laughing, albeit more uncomfortable and scattered. My coworkers did have a modicum of decency after all. My wife, for her part, covered her mouth in shock. But her cheeks betrayed a grin, and her eyes sparkled. I saw it. Fucking women. They never miss an opportunity to school you on their superior perception and that they have men all figured out, yet this apparent wealth of insight seems to fail them when they need it most. The Mountain should have been dressed as a used car salesman for as fake as he was.

At that moment in time I believed I had no recourse. I certainly didn't have backup, especially from where I should have had it the most. Suddenly no longer thirsty, or hungry or festive for that matter, I abandoned the beer and began to walk away. I gathered Kelly's hand in my own as I started to move. For the briefest moment she had resisted the force pulling her before some part of her brain engaged and she began to follow. She probably just wasn't expecting a sudden departure but I took the resistance I felt as another mini betrayal and dropped her hand like a hot potato before her feet had even begun to move.

I was moving in determined but unhurried strides. I was vaguely aware of Kelly making generic excuses to the assembled parties before following me. Jack made sure to call out.

"Hey, come on now, Nicky! I was just kidding. Don't be like that. God knows I would never want to get on your bad side!"

That caused more laughter, including a start from Kelly I heard before she caught herself. She just couldn't help it. For the briefest moment I entertained the idea that for once in his life, Jack might have wondered if he pushed things too far. But no, that required self-reflection he did not possess. Even if by some miracle he did, his pride would require him to stay committed so he could save face.

I made it some distance away before settling on a picnic bench, staring at nothing. Kelly was right behind me, watching the unfolding drama playing out on my face. I could sense several emotions swirling through her, taking turns at the forefront of her thoughts. Exasperation (at me). Embarrassment (not for me, because of me). Confusion (exactly what should she say to me). Even maybe disappointment. Disapproval? Disrespect? How had he so thoroughly undermined me so fast to my own wife? How was she so oblivious to it?

Finally, she spoke. "Was that display really necessary?"

I looked at her incredulously.

"I mean, so your friend was giving you a hard time. And, yeah, he was a little crude. But he was just playing around. It was obvious. He's probably had more than a few."

I stood slowly and faced her.

"My... friend?"

"Well, whatever. I don't know." She decided to change tactics, "Hey, if you don't want guys to get flirty with your wife, maybe you shouldn't be showing off the goods to your coworkers."

I could only bow my head slightly with eyes closed and give it a few shakes in frustration. Kelly misread my body language entirely.

"Look, why don't we go sort this out. I'm sure we can all get together and exchange apologies and realize it was just a misunderstanding." She said this while indicating over her shoulder back where we came from.

I had a momentary delay before I responded, "No thanks. I understood perfectly, and my day is ruined anyway."

I turned and headed towards the car. When I got there, I realized I had made the trek alone. I looked and saw her back at the drink station in the distance. I stewed for a bit, likely at risk of chewing off my own tongue as my vision turned red, then got in my car and started it to get the AC going. I sat for a bit studying the detail of the manufacturer's emblem on the steering wheel as the interior cooled off even if my anger did not. Finally, I said fuck it to myself and put my car in reverse. No sooner that I started to move that I heard a knock at the passenger window. Kelly was standing there, giving me a what the hell gesture. I put it back in park so the doors unlocked and my wife got in with a huff.

"What the fuck is your problem? I only went over to extend our apologies and Mr. Knowles was kind enough to apologize as well." She said.

"Apologize? For what? That guy is a world class asshole! Today was many things, but atypical was not one of them where he is concern- Wait. Mr. Knowles?"

Kelly was momentarily taken aback because I never, and I mean NEVER, sound like this. It should have been a red flag to her but she was brushing it off because the five minutes she spent with him was telling her something different. Then she flushed briefly at being called out for her new acquaintance. But then in some subconscious bid to retain the high ground she found her anger again.

"Fine! I tried to do the right thing, but you chose to jump down my throat. I can't believe you're acting like this. I would have thought you would be so childish. I really do have to babysit you, don't I!"

I have no idea what crossed over my face. Whatever it was it took the wind out of her sails. She turned away but did not apologize, she was all apologized out apparently. The drive home was silent. I was brooding, of course. I figured she was doing the same but the one time I risked a glance in her direction I saw a weak reflection of her face in the window. It was faint, but there was a smile on her face.

She was... daydreaming?

___

We didn't say a word to each other that night and things were perpetually cool between us after that. There were the motions of co-habitation. Small talk, discussions on mundane things. Not a hint of intimacy. I was morosely pondering how quickly what we had seemed to evaporate. The mood calmed down after that fateful picnic, but it never passed. As much as I never deserved to have Jack Knowles enter my life, I really didn't deserve having my life partner take his side.

The next workday after the picnic Jack made sure to publicly accept my apology, the one I never made. I barely registered the thinly veiled taunt, but now for a different reason. I was no longer porous, I had encased myself in stone. For the first time ever, I wasn't going with the flow. Now I had resentment. His comment was just thrown onto the pile.

You could say I was having a sort of crisis of faith. For the first time ever, my ingrained lifelong defense mechanism had failed me. I was having difficulty coping, understandably.

The more I thought about my wife the worse the taste in my mouth became. The man is supposed to snap out of it and apologize after a few days but I had nothing to apologize for and earning Kelly's forgiveness held no appeal. In fact, even receiving an apology from her held no appeal. I realized I didn't care. I really began to analyze her every action from a new perspective. Did she always have these tiny little bad habits? Was I just noticing these things? Had I been suppressing minor annoyances out of love?

Admittedly there were some petty gripes among the new questions. Things I no doubt knew before but now I was aware of. I was realizing that her taste in music really sucks. I was thinking about the fact that her car is a pig sty. There must be at least ten empty disposable coffee cups on her passenger seat. Why does it seem like I am just discovering all this, and why does it suddenly bother me so?

This was all, however, merely reciprocation from what she felt towards me. I would bet money she thought she was hiding it, but I was truly watching her now. For the first time if I am being honest. I noticed the barely noticeable. The tiny grimaces at whatever habits of mine she's discovering she doesn't like. I could feel her contempt towards me. Even pity. Hell, a groveling apology for doing nothing wrong would have probably made it worse.