Forgiveness

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Finding forgiveness with my Dom through punishment.
5.8k words
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Sitting on the couch, waiting. I knew something was coming, but I wasn't sure what. I was bad, and my husband knew. He wasn't going to let it go. I wasn't really worried... he's usually not very strict with me; he loves me too much. I'm so grateful that he's forgiving and patient, but this time I wondered if I've gone too far. He's been gone for a week, and sometimes I get horny, but I don't want to pester him. When we talked, I didn't want to burden him with it, so I had watched some porn earlier in the afternoon and got myself off. 2 counts against me. I suppose I could've kept my mouth shut, but I felt so guilty. He's so perfect, I can't lie to him. So I told on myself. He didn't get mad at me, he understood that I got lonely and needed release, but he was displeased that I didn't ask first. I hated myself for it. I wished he would get mad, I deserved it. I felt dirty. All he did was say he doesn't like it, and that he thinks he has a way to fix the problem, at least temporarily. I was all for it, I hated being a disappointment.

He had asked me to be waiting, standing by the door when he got home, so I was listening intently. I heard him fumble at the door handle and I jumped, running to the kitchen and standing where he'd told me. The door opened and he came in, setting his things down and freeing up his hands before he turned to look at me. He was smiling, and I saw him sneakily push a grocery bag behind him with his foot. I raised an eyebrow quizzically, and he just shook his head, indicating I wasn't to ask questions. He held out his arms invitingly.

"Hello Love." I slipped into his arms and hugged him tightly. I'd missed him so much, I didn't even care that he smelled like he'd been working or that his hair was a mess. The scraggly overgrowth on his cheeks and untrimmed beard reminded me how long it's been since I'd seen him, and the tightness with which he held my slightly bulging frame showed me he'd missed me too. I grunt as he squeezes just a bit too tight, and he releases, looking down at my belly and smiling. "You taking care of my little boy in there? I think you've grown a bit."

"Yes, I think so too... he's been missing his daddy though. Gave me an awful backache this morning."

Concern flashed briefly across his handsome face. "You okay now? I don't wanna hurt you... badly."

Alarms went off in my head. 'Badly?' I thought. A shiver ran down my spine and our eyes met. "No, I'm fine now. Why?"

A slight grin tugged at the corner of his lip. "You've broken the rules Love. Did you think I'd forget?"

My heart skipped several beats when he gently ran his thumb across my jawline, the other four fingers wrapping firmly behind my neck and holding my body in place. I can feel the strength in them, and every hair on my body is standing on end. "No, I guess not." I replied lamely, dropping my eyes to look at a random stain on his bright green work shirt.

"That's right, I haven't. And do you remember what I told you?"

"That you're not mad, and you think you know how to fix the problem." My breath was shallow, and despite myself I could feel my nipples start to harden and my crotch getting slick with arousal. We've played around quite a bit with Dominance and submission, so we are by no means new to it, and it's always pretty clear when a scene begins and ends. Him speaking to me in this manner was a very clear request of my consent.

He's a very loving Dom, and sometimes I don't feel I deserve him. But other times I wonder what it would be like to really be afraid for once. Knowing that obedience really was the better choice. Sometimes I just want to act up and test him, but it seems impossible to make him angry. He knows I'm a brat, but instead of breaking me, he simply waits until I do as I'm told most times.

"Yes. Look at me." His hand slid forward until his fingers could grasp my throat, then he tightened them ever so slightly, reminding me that he could make it much worse if he chose. I lifted my eyes to his, and my legs turned to jelly as I saw that, while his face was stern, those beautiful green eyes were absolutely burning with lust. I reached out and putting both my hands on his chest, feeling his nipples beneath his shirt.

It only lasted for a split second before the pressure on my neck ceased, only to be applied to my arms as he roughly gripped my wrists and yanked them away from his body, forcing me back hard against the front door, pinning me hard and knocking the breath out of me.

"What the hell do you think you are doing, Bitch?"

My breath hitched again and I stared at his face in disbelief, my eyes widening as I realized what he really had in mind for the night. I remained silent, breathing heavily and staring at that irresistible face, begging him to take me with my eyes. I wriggled my wrists, trying to free them. He noticed instantly, and his face deepened into a scowl. Lifting up my arms, he crossed my left wrist over the right one, and gripped both securely with his big, strong left hand, keeping me pinned to the door. A moment later, a sting erupted over the left side of my face as he slapped me. It hurt, but only enough to shock me. "Answer me!"

"I...I just wanted to touch you!" I managed to squeak out, still recovering from the slap.

"You know better. When you're in trouble, you don't get to touch." His now free hand wandered to my shoulder, pushing my sleeve down slightly so my bra strap showed. It was my lacy grey one with the removable straps. He nodded with approval before saying. "I am going to shower. You are going to wear the shirt I bought you. Put it on, with your grey pants that I like. The paint stained ones. No underwear. Keep that bra. Sit on the couch and wait for me. Did you shower like I told you to?"

My mind raced. He had texted me 30 minutes before coming home and asked if I would wash myself and shave everything, except the small strip of hair I always leave on my crotch. I didn't think much of it, but I was surprised he didn't want me to wait for him to get home. Now it all made sense. He had been planning this. "Yes, of course. You asked me to."

"Good girl. Do as you're told. NOW." He let go of my hands and let them drop, gripping my shoulder tightly before releasing me entirely and stepping back. He reached into his grocery bag and pulled out a thin white tank top, probably from a $3 rack at Walmart. I took it obediently and went towards the bedroom to change. As I passed, he grabbed and squeezed my ass, hard enough to make me gasp slightly as the muscle twitched in protest. I knew better than to look back at him, and continued on my way. As I changed, I could hear his trimmers buzzing, followed by the sink running as he brushed his teeth and shaved off the stubble from the week. Then the shower water. By this time I had finished dressing and sat on the couch. I was dying to know what else was in the mysterious bag, but I also knew that it would not go well if he caught me peeking, so I refrained.

It felt like an eternity before he finally stepped out of the bathroom, and to my utter dismay, he had his towel wrapped around his waist, covering his package. He quickly strode across the room, grabbed his bag, turned, and went into the bedroom and shut the door before I could say anything. I wiggled uncomfortably for a few more minutes, listening and hearing the rattle and clink of our bondage gear and the rattle of the plastic bag.

Finally, the door opened. He was dressed again, jeans and a cowboy shirt, and he had the mysterious bag still in tow. He walked into the kitchen again, looking at me lustily. "Come here." I obeyed without hesitation this time. I stood where he pointed, eyes searching his face for some hint or clue of his emotions. He was stoic, stern, unwavering. He eyed me hungrily, scanning to see if I'd followed instructions, and smiling at the snug fit of the shirt he'd bought. It clung to my every curve and was very slightly see through, and clearly he was pleased. "Here's how this is going to go. You have been a bad girl, and you need to be taught better. You may fight back, but understand that there will be consequences for your disobedience. I am not angry with you, but I do not want you to forget this. You do not speak unless I ask you a direct question. If you do, you will be punished. The exception to this is your safewords. Do you know them?"

I try to contain my excitement as I reply; "Yes. Yellow means I am nearing my limit and would like you to move on or be more gentle. Red means everything stops."

"Good. Are you ready to begin?"

I take a deep shaky breath. I don't know why I'm nervous. He's never given me more than I can take. I trust him; if anything he's always been too lax with me when it comes to a punishment. But this time, there was something in his eyes. Something unforgiving. Something dangerous, and it turned me on. "Yes, I'm ready."

The breath whooshed out of my body as I was slammed against the kitchen door again, but this time with my back to him. He wrestled my arms behind my back roughly, and I heard the clink of metal behind me. He had the cold handcuff around my right wrist so fast I barely knew what was happening. My instincts took over and I struggled to free my other hand before he could imprison it. He grunted with disapproval and clicked the other cuff shut, making it slightly too tight. A moment later, my face was pressed against the door and he held it there by my hair, his tight grip almost making my eyes water. I grunted and wriggled under his iron fist, unable to speak.

"You bitch... we've only just started! Are you testing me?"

I Stayed silent, eyes closed and waited. A swift, hard smack on my ass brought me back. "No! I... I'm not testing you."

He grunted, unconvinced. Still holding my head still, he released my cuffs, knowing I couldn't get free, and started to speak again. "I have some new things for tonight. You do not have the option of picking and choosing. You take it all, or none. Do you want to use your safeword?"

"No." I managed to grunt. He nodded with approval before releasing my head and bending down to retrieve something from the bag. He held me still against the door with his hip, and I could hear the clink of a metal buckle. He grabbed a fistful of hair again and pulled my head back sharply, and I saw what we had. A black leather blindfold with soft padded lining. I sucked in an excited breath and he laughed throatily.

"Are you gonna be good and let me put this on?" I nodded and held still while he smoothed my hair down, stroking it gently almost as an apology for pulling so hard. He slid the blindfold over my eyes and the world went dark as he buckled it behind my hair. He pulled it tight, tighter than I had expected, and growled in my ear, "So you don't get any big ideas about pulling it off." That was fair, I'd done that before and he had been very displeased with me.

I nodded again, and started to say something, when a loud smack on my ass made me gasp. "Remember what I told you? Clearly you aren't a very good listener. Stay put, like this. Do not move, understand?"

"Yes." He paused, then released me. I could hear him briefly going into the bedroom, but then he fell so quiet I couldn't tell where he was standing. I wriggled anxiously, only to receive another smack, this time on my left ass cheek. I yelped and reflexively flinched away, as this had been harder than the earlier hits, and it really stung. He was getting frustrated, I could tell.

He sighed. "You just can't get this through your head, can you? Fine." He grabbed my jaw and forced my mouth open, shoving a knot of fabric into my mouth, which I quickly realized was my green scarf as he wrapped it around my head and then back to the front, covering my mouth and muffling my protests and squeals. "I don't want you giving up on me too easy, you little slut. No safe words for you." Once he finished his handiwork, he put a hand on my spine and pushed me against the door again, squashing my breasts. Putting his mouth right by my ear, he whispered threateningly "If you are too much of a pussy to take what I can give you, thump your foot or hands twice on whatever is closest to you. That is your only escape. Show me."

My whole body on fire with the thrill of the danger, I thumped my foot twice on the floor as instructed. He nibbled on my ear affectionately for a moment, as though to remind me that my gentle, loving husband was still in him, before grabbing me by the handcuffs and alternately dragging and shoving me in the general direction of the bedroom. He shoved me roughly down onto the bed. "Stay, or I will make you hurt." The threat was so real, and his voice was so deep, a hot blast of fear coursed through my body and held me in place. I knew he meant it.

I could hear the clinking of metal, and shivered as he touched my arm deceptively gently, running his fingers over the bare parts of my skin. Then I felt the leather cuff encircle my arm, just above the metal ones. Once I was fully buckled in, he spoke. "I'm going to take the handcuffs off now. If you fight me, you will suffer. If you cooperate, this will go better for you. Your choice."

For the first time in my life, it actually occurred to me that it might not be the best idea to anger him further. I nodded, and he unlocked the cuffs. He kept my hands behind my back with the leather ones, but turned my body to face him. He was standing, and I was kneeling on the bed. I could hear him suck in a breath, and then felt his strong, rough hand grab my right breast. I gasped in shock, instinctively pulling away from the pressure. Growl.

The tearing of fabric filled my ears as he took two fistfuls of the thin white shirt and pulled, ripping it apart and exposing my bra. I whimpered in fear, pain and arousal, pulling at my cuffs as he grabbed both my breasts and squeezed them hard. He shoved me onto my back and was straddling me in an instant, tearing and pulling at the fabric of my shirt until it he could toss it away. I felt him unhook the straps of my bra in the front before twisting my body far enough to undo the back, leaving my torso completely exposed. He pushed me down flat again, using my own weight to pin my arms behind me.

A scream tried to worm it's way around the gag as he took both breasts and squeezed them tightly, twisting my hard, sensitive nipples and making them even harder. It hurt, but stronger than the pain was my adrenaline pumping. I was loving every second of this. I couldn't help squirming, but I did not want him to stop.

He finally let go of my nipples, which were probably red by now, and climbed off me, freeing my hips and legs so he could tear off my pants, leaving me totally bare in the warm air. I struggled to sit up when he grabbed my cuffs and detached them from each other, only to reattach them to opposite sides of the headboard. I was now facing the wall, on my knees, bound, gagged and blindfolded tightly, completely naked and on display. He got off the bed and there was agonizing silence. After a long moment, I heard the clink of his belt buckle, and subsequent slide of leather on jeans as he pulled it off. I shuddered, knowing my fate. He'd never used a belt before. The thick leather strap rested down on my ass for a moment, before he asked;

"Do you know why I am going to beat you?" Unable to speak, I just nodded. "You have been rebellious from the moment I came home. That's unacceptable." I nodded again, surprised that he made no mention of my masturbation. "I'm going to use the belt 10 times. If you flinch or pull away, the count begins again. You will not be punished for making noise. Understand?" I nodded weakly, hanging my head down and gripping the familiar wood of the headboard in preparation. The first hit wasn't very hard, but it still shocked me. It landed across my right ass cheek, heat spreading outward. "One. Keep count in your head." I nodded again, my mind foggy with sensation and arousal. Two. The second stroke fell on the other side, slightly harder than the first. Strict, not painful. I kept perfectly still and silent. The hits were several seconds apart, allowing me to adjust. The third stroke was harder than the first two, and each subsequent hit got harder and harder until I could no longer stay quiet. I whimpered at eight, squealed at nine, and as the tenth stroke of the belt fell, a little sob wracked my body. My ass was hot and aggravated, my fingers hurt from gripping the wood so tightly, and I felt a gush of fluid rush out from my pussy and slide down my thighs.

"Good girl. Very good." His hands gently touched my red skin and I shuddered. It felt so soft and sweet after the belt. He caressed my ass, tickling and massaging it thoroughly, removing all memory of hurt and replacing it with delicious warmth. I instinctively parted my legs and bent further forward, exposing my pussy and showing the shining streak of fluid on my thighs. A throaty, sex-laced laugh worked it's way out of his throat as he ran his fingers up my thighs, coating them in my juices, but not touching my pussy. "You little slut! You're loving this aren't you?"

I whined and pushed my ass closer to him, nodding slightly and pulling at my wrists. "You want me to let you bend over?" I nodded enthusiastically, trying to push my hips down to get his dancing fingers closer to my throbbing clit. He laughed at my effort, pulling his hands away. "Very well. But your punishment is not over." He ran his hand along my spine, tickling it and making me arch like a cat, moaning with pleasure.

His hands continued to explore, slowly and deliberately, until he landed at my sensitive, rock hard nipples. "Even your nipples are leaking for me!" He exclaimed, smearing the milk over them and gently pinching and pulling. I was moaning and writhing, trying to beg him to suck on them, but the gag kept me quiet. Somehow, he knew, and said, "You look so delicious right now... I'm tempted to have a little snack." I nodded furiously, pushing my breasts out as close to him as I could get them, making them as enticing as I could, which I knew would drive him insane. I could hear him suck in a breath, and he growled, low and threatening, "Are you trying to seduce me?"

Knowing I wouldn't get away with the lie, I just slowly nodded my head, hanging it again in shame. "You bad girl... This won't feel good." A blast of pressure erupted from my right breast as he latched on, sucking hard. I cried out and my body thrashed, overwhelmed with the flood of sensation. He grabbed and twisted my other nipple fiercely while he continued to suck. Either he lessened up, or my body adjusted, because it wasn't long before I was pushing my breasts forward again, begging him to suck me harder. He obliged this time, getting a boob in each fist and squeezing them as he switched back and forth, sucking on each nipple and lapping up the fluid that was starting to leak freely and drip onto the bedsheets below me.

After what felt like a very long time, he pulled back and gave my nipples a final pinch, before grabbing something off of my bedside table. I heard the chain rattle just before the clamps tightened around my sensitive buds. I whimpered again as he released me, feeling the weight of the chain as it swung and tugged on my nipples.

He leaned back, then said; "Time for you to bend over for me. I'm going to release you. Put your wrists together over your head, and stick that ass out." I nodded eagerly, and obeyed. He swiftly clipped my wrists together and chained them to the center bedpost. He kindly slid a pillow under my arms and head, allowing me to bury my face in it and take the weight off my arms. As I got comfortable, feeling the nipple clamp chain pulling on me, I could hear him undressing, and my breath came in shorter gasps. "I think I will take off the blindfold and gag now. Have you learned not to be a bitch?" I whined and nodded, so happy that I'd earned that freedom. He took the gag off first and let me work my jaw. I hadn't even noticed the soreness until then. Next came the blindfold. I squinted at the brightness of the light after so long in the dark, but my eyes slowly adjusted and I could see his sexy figure sitting next to and slightly behind me. He stroked my hair off of my face and smiled gently, running his fingers over my neck. He leaned forward and placed a tender, lingering kiss on my forehead. It felt so loving, so sweet, so gentle and so sincere, I almost wondered if he was going to forget about punishing me any further. In that moment, all I could think about was tasting him. His lips, his salty, hot skin, his delicious precum which I was sure had slicked up his hard penis by now. Before I could say anything, he pulled away, and spoke.

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