Hornet's Nest Ch. 09

Stepping outside, the sunshine felt like a wave of reality to smack me in the face. No matter what happens, the world keeps turning. Life doesn't wait for you. I'd had a week 'off', and now I was returning, and wanted - no,needed- to fix whatever had become broken in my absense.

I needed to talk to Dad, I knew that.

As we approached Mum's car, I had a little urge to ask if I could drive, but didn't bother, as I knew the answer anyways. We followed Darren's Jag out of the carpark, then all the way to his house. We hung around for however long it took for Violet to collect her things.

God, it was so weird. Everyone was trying to act like normal, but things weren't normal. The constant underlying tension could make me sick.

Violet was reserved, and it scared me. I didn't want to see her back in that cold and emotionless state, but she was closing up, slowly but surely.

There was no trace of Hanna when we got home. That wasn't a good sign, either. Violet went ahead of me, lugging her suitcase upstairs to my room. I paused with my hand on the bannister, and looked at Wes, who shrugged at me. I followed, and found her sprawled on my bed. I stepped over the suitcase and leant down to kiss her cheek.

"I'm gonna shower."

"Okay."

It was a long, hot shower. I wasn't sure if it helped me feel any better. I heard the front door opening and closing while drying off - Dad was home. When I returned to my room in nothing but a towel, Violet had propped herself up against the wall with the pillows, legs crossed beneath her laptop.

She looked at me. Not my face - her eyes stayed on my body. It was enough to give me the slightest butterflies, marred by her lack of expression. I stepped closer and she moved the laptop aside, swinging her legs over the side of the bed, and reached out to touch my stomach. Her fingers brushed over the healing wound on my side, and she studied it.

"Are scars sexy?" I asked.

Her eyes softened and she managed a little smile. "Everything about you is sexy." She kissed my stomach, then shifted across the bed, inviting me to sit.

The signals were mixed. She didn't seem interested, but I couldn't deny that I wanted it. She was too distracted, and distant, and I wanted it to stop. I wanted her to focus on me.

It was a bad time, anyways. I'd already smelt dinner cooking. We were only kissing, not too heavily, when Wesley knocked and poked his head through the door without waiting for a reply.

"Yeah, food, and stuff."

I put some clothes on, and made sure to stay ahead of Violet as we went downstairs to the kitchen. Dad was sitting at the table, but I don't know why I went in with my guard up. He didn't look like there was any fight in him. His whole posture sagged with exhaustion, he was up to his eyeballs in stress. Life went on. He was still juggling company business on top of everything.

He gave me a genuine look that didn't need words. He cared, and he was very glad to see me out of hospital. It's just that his eyes slid across Violet like she didn't exist.

It was a strange and quiet dinner. Hanna wasn't there, and everything felt wrong.

Even afterward, I had no idea how to start a conversation with Dad. What exactly did I want to say? Where to start it? He wasn't making it any easier. Just like Violet, he was closed up, and made it very obvious that he wanted to avoid any and all interactions.

Violet and I retreated behind the door of my room, but even we seemed plagued with trying to act normal when neither of us felt it. I put on a movie, but twenty minutes in, a scene with gunfire came up. I turned it off without thinking, and as soon as I'd realised my mindless impulse, I felt stupid to put it back on again. Violet said nothing.

We were both tired. We hadn't said anything meaningful to each other the whole day. She leisurely began to undress, and I did as well. I was down to my boxers when she perched on the side of the bed with her back to me. I reached over to undo the clasp of her bra, then slid my hands around the front, over her breasts. She leant back against me. I just needed to feel her, her body, her skin against mine.

Apparently it was mutual, as she turned to push me down on the mattress and kiss me. I think the intent was there, we just didn't get anywhere. She laid her weight on top of me, and we kissed, and ground a little, and kissed some more. The intensity never escalated. My hands traced down her back, but when my fingers hooked in her waistband she tensed, tearing her lips away from mine.

"I'm sorry, I just..."

"It's okay." I meant it. Neither of us really had the energy.

She relaxed, and rolled aside to remove the tiny bit of clothing that remained. I stroked along her thigh, up her stomach. I just wanted to feel her. She gave me a happy smile and tugged at my boxers. I took them off while she turned off the light.

It wasn't fully dark outside yet, and I watched her figure return to the bed through the faint light piercing the curtains. We could sleep early, that was okay. I lifted the duvet and she clambered in beside me, and snuggled up against me. I held her tight.

Even if I'd done too much sleeping at the hospital, the comfort of having her in my arms let me drift off easily enough.

*

Darren's voice has a way of piercing solid objects. Like walls, and floors. I didn't expect to be jolted awake by it. I blinked at the ceiling in confusion, trying to determine whether I was having some weird dream.

Violet's body shifted beside me and I checked my phone. Somewhere around midday. Why was Darren here?

I sat up further, rubbing my eyes and grimacing. The volume. It was shouting, infuriated yelling. Darren and Dad's voices going at each other, holy shit, it sounded like thunder. A stone of dread was settling in my stomach as I stumbled around for clothes.

I made brief eye contact with Vi. "Shit," she said.

Yes. Shit.

After struggling with some tracksuits I was out the door, down the stairs. It just got louder. I didn't know what I was walking in to.

They were in the kitchen. Wesley's body blocked the door from the lounge, but he tossed a wide-eyed glance over his shoulder and stepped aside for me.

Mum stood by the back door, staring out into the garden. Tyler was leaning against the counter and staring at the floor.

Dad and Darren seemed to take up all the space in that room. The volume was unbearable, just an explosion of sound every time either said something. They were shouting over each other. This was what it looked like, when both simultaneously snapped and resorted to the most juvenile tactics.

I don't think any domestics are pleasant, verbal or physical, but this wasn't normal, not for my family. There was a tension that was cutting deep. Some kind of severity that had Mum and Tyler in silence, Wesley looking like he wanted to disappear into the floor.

It could get worse. Dad was bristling, showing the weight in his shoulders. Darren stood his ground.

Before then, I never could've imagined Darren swinging a fist at my father. But things were different now. My heart thudded sickeningly against my ribs as I watched what might unfold.

They couldn't fight. Who would stop them? Wesley, and get snapped in half? Tyler, when his shoulder was still fucked up? Me? I didn't believe I could take on my dad. I'd heard a lot of stories, but I'd never seen him get truly violent. I didn't want to.

And there was Darren. Staring him down, almost as if daring him to do it.

It was all on Dad controlling his anger. Not swinging that first punch.

A thousand thoughts raced through my head while I tried to piece together the words I was hearing, tried to understand what the argument was even about.

Dad had said something 'incriminating' to someone called Lawrence, about Violet. Darren was going apeshit about it, but Dad was vehemently denying every accusation.

What a fucking mess. I looked across the room at Mum in desperation, but she kept her gaze fixed on the garden, shaking her head to herself.

They were finally quietening. There was even a pause for a breather.

I couldn't help but feel this was my fault. I was ripping this family apart. If I'd just spoken to Dad last night...

"I would've thought someone like you had a little more compassion," Darren snapped.

"Why w-"

"What's your problem? Don't like the fact that she shot people with the gun you gave to her?"

"No-"

"That she comes from a background identical to your own?"

"It's not."

Darren scoffed. "It basically is. What is it, Zack? Does she scare you?"

"Darren-"

"What's your problem?"

"She's a fucking sociopath!"

"And you're not?!"

There was a brief silence, where Dad looked like that had pierced his armour.

"Stop this shit, Zack. Juststop."

This had been brewing that whole week.

"You're being irrational," Darren continued.

"I am? For fuck sa-"

"You go saying this bullsh-"

"It's not what I said-"

"Give me this fucking mess?"

"It's not my fault! Someone put two and two together and got on Lawrence's arse about it. For fuck sake, Darren. If you're gonna pay someone to manipulate a case at least pay someone who can do it!"

"That's not what he's doing-"

"The fuck it ain't!"

Darren rubbed his brow. "So you go saying-"

"No-"

"Zack. You want her to rot in prison?"

Dad gave him a dark glare, and no immediate response. "You've made it your personal mission to be good samaritan, huh?" he growled. "And want me to do all the work."

"No-"

The voices boomed again.

"Look at what she's done!"

Darren was getting animated. "She made a mistake!"

"A hell of a mistake!"

"And you were perfect at nineteen, were you? Always made better decisions?"

"Yes, actually-"

"No," Tyler cut in. "You didn't."

Dad's glare moved to Tyler, who stared back at him and didn't flinch.

"Jesus, Zack. Everybody does stupid shit in the heat of the moment. We know that better than anybody, huh? If I can get over it, so can you."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I'm fucking serious."

The silence that followed was just as unsettling as the shouting.

Darren swallowed, staring at the floor, before looking back up. "When did we ever turn you away?"

Dad lost his composure. He sat himself down at the table and buried his head into his hands.

Mum placed a hand on his shoulder. "Zack, everybody deserves a chance. She needs help, and you can help her."

"She won't listen to a word I say."

"Dad," I said. "I just... If you'd just talk to her. She's not a bad person." The eyes in the room fixed on me, then moved past me. I glanced over my shoulder in time to see Violet's figure disappearing out of the lounge. Shit.

I was torn. I wanted to go running after her, but also wanted to stay and see this argument resolved. If I heard the front door I knew to panic.

Mum looked annoyed, like she took the fact that Violet might've listened to the entire exchange very personally - it was her house, her hospitality that had been compromised. Her eyes moved between Dad and Darren. "Are you two quite finished?"

"What-" Dad started.

"Are you done?" she snapped. "Good God. Is the pecking order settled now? Figured out who's 'alpha'?"

Tyler smirked, but Mum's eyes kept moving between them like she was scolding little children.

"Absolutely fucking shameful."

Darren looked to the floor. Dad managed to bury his head even further into his hands.

"Mum, I..."

She just nodded at me, and gestured for me to leave, to go after Violet. I rushed upstairs. I wasn't sure what state I expected to find her in. Upset, maybe crying. Maybe angry and frustrated.

She was sitting on the bed, and looked unnervingly calm.

"Hey," I started. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay."

"Dad's just, he's got issues, he'll get over it. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, David. I walked out before someone said something to me. It's not my place."

I stood very still for a moment, trying to decide what to do. People just don't act like that, so cool and collected. Something was wrong. "Vi, my dad..."

"I think he's right."

"What?"

"Yeah. I think you're all idiots and he's the only smart person in this family."

I stared at her in disbelief.

She fidgeted a bit. "David, I don't think I should be here."

"No-"

"My parents are gonna go to prison. I don't really know what to do. I think I should sign up to the service. Maybe that'll sort me out."

"No, don't you fucking dare." I sat beside her and slung my arm around her shoulders. "It's gonna be fine, Vi. Everything's gonna be okay." She leant into me. At least she was still accepting of affection. She wasn't pushing me away.

There were faint voices from downstairs, and eventually the sound of the front door shutting. I guessed Darren and Tyler left. Wesley's footsteps came upstairs, then his room door shut, heavily. He had a shift at the restaurant in a few hours.

I didn't want to go out to see anybody. I didn't want to leave Violet.

A short while later, the front door shut again. Either Mum, or Dad, or both of them, had left. Then Wesley left - he didn't call in sick or anything, no, just went and got on with life. He was probably more than happy to get out of the house at that point.

When I eventually went downstairs around 5pm, the house was empty. I guessed it was a slightly better sign if Mum and Dad had gone out together. I was reminded of my thoughts at the hospital - it wasn't about me. Everybody had issues they were working through, things that had been stirred up and they needed to face.

"Vi," I said, leaning back through my bedroom's door. "Looks like we're eating alone tonight. What do you want for dinner?"

She pulled a little smile while staring at her laptop. "Pasta."

I snorted. "Icancook other things, you know."

"It's okay, I don't really feel like anything else."

We had another weird evening of trying to act normal.

*

The next day, Tyler and I had to go down to the station to give statements. I was confused, and mildly alarmed, but Darren assured me everything was fine. Before I went in, I spoke with the 'Lawrence' man from the argument. He made sure I understood everything I had to say. I simply had to explain what my entire involvement with the Driscoll raid had been. It wasn't anything to do with Violet. Well, not exactly.

We were lying. Or giving half-information, more accurately. Whatever it was, Lawrence made sure I'd say what I needed to, and I complied. I didn't want to screw something up or see anybody in trouble.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, as I walked back out to the car with Tyler and Darren.

"This," Darren replied, referring to the whole Driscoll ordeal with a wave of his hand towards the station's building, "is over with."

"Yeah, and everything else?"

"How's Violet?" he asked. I wasn't sure if him answering my question with a question was some sort of avoidance.

"I'm not really sure," I replied. "I don't think she knows, either."

"Keep her talking," Tyler said.

Tyler thought talking was the cure for all problems. There was truth in it, though. Bottling up never helped anybody. Violet had been pretty quiet, but I didn't know how to break it. I was too scared of saying the wrong thing.

"Are we gonna talk?" I asked, clambering into the backseat.

"About what, kid?"

"Everything."

"Yeah, we will. Not right now."

"Why?"

"Still too much shit going on."

They dropped me off home, and I walked down the driveway, studying the exterior of my house. It felt like everybody was existing around each other. I didn't like it. I wanted things smoothed over. My parents and uncles had been through all sorts of shit before, hadn't they? So they could get through this.

I could get through this, and so could Vi. I went straight upstairs to find her.

My bedroom was empty. Okay... I checked the bathroom. Empty.

Back to my room. Her suitcase was gone. So was her laptop.

There was a note, on my desk. A hand-written fucking note. It was strange to pick it up and read it. I'd barely even known what her hand-writing looked like before.

What. The. Fuck.

"Mum!" I thundered down the stairs. "Mum!"

She was in the study, on her computer. I burst in like a storm and she scowled at me. I didn't mean to be behaving like that, the burst of panic was just too much.

"Why'd you let her go?" I boomed.

"What?"

"Violet!"

"What-"

"She's gone!"

"She went out for a walk twenty minutes ago."

"A walk?! Her suitcase is gone, she's taken her shit! She's packed up! You just let her sneak out under your nose?"

Mum gave me an incredulous look. "What?"

"She's gone to sign up to the fucking service! She wants to be drafted!"

"David-"

"For fuck sake, Mum!"

She got to her feet in answer to my raised voice. "Was I supposed to keep her locked up here?!"

"Yeah, basically! She's fucking unstable!"

"David-"

"When did she leave? Twenty minutes ago?"

"That's what I-"

"She's probably walking to the station. I can still catch her, I have to stop her."

"David,stop."

No, I couldn't stop. There wasn't time to think. Violet was off being Violet again and I had to keep up with her. I needed a car. I rushed out to the hallway with Mum on my heels.

"David, if she needs some space-"

"No, she doesn't!"

"Would you listen to yourself?!"

Yeah, I got it. I sounded like that psycho controlling boyfriend. But Mum didn't understand. She couldn't. She didn't know Violet like I did. I wasn't going to watch her walk headfirst into another disaster. Maybe if I'd been a little stronger before, the whole Driscoll disaster would've never happened.

Dad blocked my way, and my blood boiled. I didn't have time for this.

He didn't glare, he didn't say anything, and held out his car keys instead. I took them before I had a chance to be stunned and left out the front door.

---

Violet

I was perhaps five minutes away from the central station, staring at the floor and lost in my own world. It was a self-inflicted agony, and I knew that, but I genuinely believed I was doing the right thing.

My suitcase's little wheels made a constant noise across the pavement. It wasn't really a dragging noise, it was just gravelly, annoying. Loud enough to be obnoxious.

You know what else was obnoxious? A car steering across the wrong side of the road, up onto the curb, and nearly hitting me.

A black SUV. With privacy glass. I backed away from the opening door, tossing a glare at the driver.

"You fucking idiot," David growled.

Why was he here.

I tightened my grip on the handle of my suitcase and stared at him in a frozen moment. My mind blanked. This wasn't going to plan. He was supposed to be busy at the police station, I was supposed to be out of town. I knew he'd kick up a fuss, and that was why I had to be gone.

"Why do you think you're fucking doing?" he continued.

"The right thing," I replied.

"No." He tentatively stepped forward, but I didn't move. His hand gripped my shoulder, then moved to cup my cheek. "Stop this. Come home, and talk."

I stared at him, and couldn't think of what to say. He took the strap of my laptop bag and lifted it over my head, then reached around to take the handle of my suitcase. I released it. I stood perfectly still while he put both in the boot of the car.

"Vi, come on. Please." He held the still-open driver's door and watched me.

I walked around the bonnet to the passenger side, but when I reached out for the handle, it kicked in.

Fuck this.

I was off. My body leapt to action without orders. Running, as usual. Running from everything I couldn't face.

I heard the slam of a car door behind me, but I didn't look. I didn't stop. I raced to the end of the street, took a right turn, and kept going. The buildings were all high, I just needed to climb. I knew he was chasing.