How I Earned My Place in the World

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Two college students come to terms with their needs.
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As she was untying me, Cheryl asked me a most surprising question, "Tell me, what do you want out of this relationship? Surely you want more out of this than being a pleasant little fucktoy at my beck and call!"

I thought a bit, unsure how to answer. My lips were a little swollen and numb, she had sat roughly on my face while I worked kind of hard to make her come. It took much longer than normal to satisfy her.

Plus, my mind was foggy because I find being mounted and ridden by her in that way to be very arousing, and she had told me I couldn't have an orgasm, even by my own hand. I was rock hard, and up to that point, all I could think about was that sweet release I needed so badly.

Once I was free, she sat back on the bed in her own tiny off campus apartment that she shared with a roommate I rarely saw, her knees tucked under her. I sat up in the bed, my back against the wall. I knew I needed to speak or lose the moment. But I wasn't sure what to say.

I spoke anyway, I'm a guy and speaking before I know completely what to say isn't all that unusual. I figured that if I started speaking, the truth would find its way out eventually.

"I love being a fucktoy! Well, your fucktoy, anyway!" I could feel myself blushing, and I saw Cheryl smile at me the way she does when she thinks I've done something cute or endearing. I took this as a sign that I should continue.

"I want to be your boyfriend too!"

Cheryl looked surprised, "Everyone we know thinks of us as a couple! We've BOTH heard the jokes about how I've got you wrapped around my little finger!"

"I love you!" I said, "In my mind, I do whatever you say because I belong to you! I don't want to be some sort of convenient penis that gets erect on command!"

That didn't come out right, I DID want to be a convenient penis that gets erect on command.

"What I mean is, I want to belong to you in a much more personal and intimate manner. I don't want you to tell me I'm a good boy just because I do whatever you say; I want you to acknowledge that we have a commitment to each other, and that it is our commitment to each other that makes me your good boy!"

I shut up, afraid I had said too much. And I could feel my fear cause my erection to sag a bit. But if she didn't want to hear this sort of thing, why did she bring it up? What if she told me to take a hike? I suddenly wanted to take it all back and let everything go on just the way it had been. It was good enough, really, it was.

But I loved her! She was THE ONE! If the price of being with her and doing whatever she says for the rest of my life was permanent uncertainty, I would gladly pay it!

Noticing my failing erection, Cheryl took my penis in her right hand and stroked it gently, "lay down." she said.

Once I had done so, she began to stroke my pectoral muscles with her left hand, making sure to pinch and flick my nipples as she did so.

"I've been thinking along similar lines." Cheryl said softly, "I'm pretty sure I love you about as much as you love me, and I wanted to make sure how you felt about it!"

She smiled her heart melting smile at me, "You can be my boyfriend if you want, but you need to understand, I'm still the boss! That is never going to change, you still have to be my fuck toy whenever I want, and do what ever I say! OK?"

I was quick to concede this, it never occurred to me that it would be otherwise, "Of course!" I began to relax and enjoy her stroking and pleasuring me. I took a deep breath, I was very happy at that moment!

"It's important that you understand that being my boyfriend doesn't mean you have any right to make decisions about our relationship. I have all the power and all the freedom, and you do not! I promise you a very bad day if you disappoint me in this!"

I nodded my acceptance of her terms, I'd have agreed to anything at that point, though it was exactly the sort of thing I wanted.

"There's a couple of other things as well." Cheryl said, I could hear a little uncertainty creep into her voice, "You don't dump me, I dump you! You are my property until I say you aren't, until then, you just do whatever I say, and all will be fine."

She was playing my body like a fine musical instrument! "I belong to you for as long as you want!" I said dreamily.

"AND!" Cheryl continued, "This one you might have trouble with! I have the right to tell anyone I want about our relationship! You don't get any say in who I tell."

That took a second to sink into my brain. Once I fully realized what she had said, I opened my eyes and started to raise my head from the pillow. Cheryl pressed my head back down.

"I didn't say you could sit up!"

"B u u t . . ." was all I could say, and even then I could only say it slowly.

"We've already heard the jokes around campus! Almost everyone half suspects our relationship isn't exactly what you'd call . . . conventional"

"Yeah But . . ."

Cheryl interrupted, "My girlfriends are always joking around, telling me how to keep you under control! It's getting more and more difficult to act like I don't know what they are talking about."

"But what if the guys find out?"

She gave me one or two firm, intense strokes that brought me almost, but not quite, to the brink of an orgasm, "We've both seen the porn sites! The sheer volume of the femdom sites tells us there is an enormous interest in this, half the guys will be jealous! I know, for sure, one or two who are already jealous of you and want to take your place!"

My territorial instincts kicked in, certain some asshole was hitting on my new girlfriend. "WHO?"

Cheryl laughed, "Down Boy! I'll let you know when someone needs a good beating!"

She pinched my nipples again in that special way she has that makes me both melt and make my dick get even harder, "We need this understanding! The truth is, some of our best activities have sprung from the minds of my friends! Their repressed libidos are a goldmine of untapped femdom."

"Well," I said, "I've already agreed that you will be the boss and make all the relationship decisions. It seems to me, my agreement on this is a done deal. You can tell whoever you want, but I can't see me telling anyone; jealous of me, or not, most of those guys would make my life a living hell if they found out!"

"Then, I'll just make a rule that you can't tell anyone without my permission, even if they ask! And I will be careful of who I tell, but I WILL tell some people."

"That works for me." I said. Cheryl continued to stroke me, it felt wonderful! I started gyrating my hips, and I gave a soft moan.

She slapped my dick, "Oh no you don't! I told you that you weren't coming tonight and I meant it!"

"But it isn't every night a boy enters a room a fuck toy and gets to leave it a boyfriend! I thought we might celebrate a little." Even I could hear a bit of whining in my voice.

"You're 100% boyfriend now, but you're still 100% fuck toy! Only now you are also 100% slave, and 100% much loved pet!"

"That's 400%! How can that be?"

Cheryl smiled a lovely, but wicked smile. "I said that I would own you, I didn't say I would make it easy for you!"

I let this sink in with both a joyful and fearful heart when I heard her say, "We'll celebrate with me sitting on your face again, and when I'm done with you, you'll go home without coming and you will NOT touch yourself until I give you permission tomorrow!"

As Cheryl threw one leg over my head and started to settle down on my face, I knew that I would cheat, and jack off furiously once I got to my own dorm room. I also knew that she would ask me if I had jacked off, and I would be obligated to tell her the truth, and then she would make tomorrow unpleasant.

I began to lick and rim her asshole. I was content. Life couldn't get any better for me.

The Library - Sunday Afternoon

I was following Cheryl to the Library, carrying both her study materials and mine. As it had quickly become our custom, I walked a half step behind her, and to her right. She had a big mid term test coming up that was worrying her (She is Pre Law). The plan was I would help her get situated and go somewhere else to do my own studying (me - English, I want to be a writer, but will likely settle for being a teacher), preferably somewhere on the other side of the library.

Cheryl said once that she couldn't concentrate if I was too close, I tend to talk to myself softly as I study, and she says I smell too good, and she finds both very distracting.

We think it is pheromones at work, not a real scent. I mean, I'm pretty clean, honest.

Besides, Cheryl would make me bathe even if I didn't want to. But I do, want to bathe, I mean.

I also find her disruptive to my own studying.

Ever since we agreed that I would become her boyfriend, slave, and personal servant, I'm much too attuned to every shuffle of her feet and every time she clears her throat. My inclination is to jump up and attend to her needs immediately even if she hasn't made her needs known.

So we've come to the conclusion that our study situation requires that I be no closer than a one minute walk from her to study, and no further than three minutes. That way, if she wants me for any reason, a quick text to my phone and a short walk insures I can serve her needs. If no suitable study site is available for me in that narrow range, I have to get her permission to study elsewhere.

At any rate, we got Cheryl settled in a nice empty corner near some reference material she would need (I don't understand all that law stuff). I chose to study at a table just outside the coffee shop, in the basement of the library; I love coffee and it helps me study, I think.

I had gotten a good study going for about an hour and a half, really getting into Chaucer's "The Wife of Bath's Tale"; in which I found insightful parallels to my own life. Cheryl had taught me so much about not only her, but my own self, and the world around me as well.

The female perspective is rich with a different wisdom than I am used to, and I love how she shares it with me. At any rate, about an hour and a half into my own study, I got a text message from Cheryl.

"Attend me", was all it said.

Immediately, I gathered up my stuff and rushed to see what Cheryl needed from me.

I found her almost buried breast high in a sea of heavy bound books and periodicals, "I need a neck and shoulder massage."

I put my own stuff down and began to give her a neck and shoulder massage. Cheryl gave a sigh of relief. I'm pretty good at massage, if I do say so, myself!

The muscles in her neck and shoulders were really knotted up and I had to work hard at loosening them. Because of our concentration we didn't hear Karen, one of Cheryl's friends I didn't know very well, come up on us.

"I wish my boyfriend would do that! What's your secret Cheryl?"

I was so startled I jumped.

Karen gave a little laugh and placed a hand on my shoulder, "Don't worry, Thad, I won't hurt you!"

Cheryl turned towards Karen, smiling, "It's pretty simple, really, you make your boyfriend understand that if he wants any sex, he has to do anything you want!"

Karen snorted, "If it were only that simple!"

Cheryl stated flatly, "It IS that simple, I've trained Thad here to obey me without question. Isn't that so, Thad?

Now, remember, I didn't know Karen very well, not at all, really. And we were both pretty new to this whole, boyfriend, fucktoy, slave thing, so I felt extreme embarrassment, I'm sure I blushed a deep red, even though I have an olive colored skin thanks to my Portuguese father.

I looked briefly at Cheryl and then back to Karen, and said, "Oh you know Cheryl, always joking around!"

Cheryl and Karen continued to chat for a bit, but I could tell Cheryl was pissed at me, and I was pretty sure I knew why. The two ladies didn't exactly ignore me, but I wasn't explicitly included in the conversation, and I decided that attentive silence on my part was the smartest thing.

Eventually, Karen needed to move on to get to her own studying, which I believe was more lawyer stuff that I will never understand, and left us.

I felt a lump in my throat, but found the strength to speak, "Do you want me to finish that neck rub?"

Cheryl gave me what I since have learned is an almost universal, "you're in trouble, Mister" look that made me feel about two inches high. How do women do that?

I'm sure my response was as close to that of a dog, in trouble with his mistress, as a human could perform.

"No, gather our stuff, we're going back to my apartment." While I scrambled to obey, she walked away from me towards the exit.

I caught up with her just outside the library. "I know you're mad at me, and I think I know why." I said.

Cheryl stopped and turned towards me, "Oh DO you? Please tell me why you think I am mad at you!"

"I didn't tell Karen that I do everything you say!"

"Apparently you DON'T do everything I say, since I told you to tell Karen about our relationship and you did not!"

"It's just that . . ."

Cheryl interrupted, "But that's not the only reason I'm mad at you!"

She mimicked me in what I thought was a high and excessively feminine voice, "Oh, You know how Cheryl likes to joke around!"

"You didn't just violate our agreement, you disrespected me! You held me up to ridicule!"

I was taken aback. I had reacted instinctively to get out of an embarrassing situation without thinking about if I was embarrassing her. At that point, I REALLY felt like shit.

"I'm so sorry, Cheryl!"

"Do you, or Do you not, want to be my slave and fuck toy?" She asked.

We were on the quad, and I thought her voice was excessively loud considering the number of people around. Why were there so many people out here on a Sunday afternoon?

I spoke softly, hoping she would turn her own volume down a bit. "Of course I do, Cheryl! These last two weeks have made me incredibly happy!"

"Then you agree that if I tell you to do something, YOU HAVE TO DO IT?"

She wasn't really getting my volume hints, people were starting to notice and snicker. I wasn't sure how much they could hear.

"Yes, Yes, of course! You're the boss!"

"Well this boss says she can't let this pass, you have to be punished! When we get to my apartment, you WILL be punished!"

"Anything you say, Cheryl! Let's get to the apartment now!" I turned to walk in the direction of the apartment, but she held her ground.

"I didn't dismiss you! I lead, you follow!"

"Yes, of course!" I returned to her side and looked at her expectantly.

Cheryl took a deep breath and with great determination led me to her apartment. She was silent the whole time.

When we got to her apartment, her roommate was gone. I know she exists, I met her once, but I haven't seen her since. Cheryl yelled for her and looked in her roommate's bedroom, dragging me by the waist of my cargo shorts as she looked around.

Once she was satisfied that we were alone, she told me to undress.

"What if your roommate comes back?" I asked.

"Then I will tell her about you and me, and if I need to demonstrate my power over you, then you will do anything I say without question or hesitation, is that understood?"

"Yes, of course" I was quickly learning that a man in trouble with his woman will agree to almost anything to get out of trouble.

"Besides, we don't get along all that well, and maybe finding out about you will disgust her and make her move out!"

I undressed while she went into the small kitchen and brought out a chair and placed it in the middle of the living room.

Once I was naked, I stood straight and waited, I didn't know what was coming, but I knew something was definitely coming. Her attitude plainly said as much.

Silently, Cheryl walked over to me and cupped my balls in her hand like she was judging the quality of plums in the supermarket. She looked down into my eyes, we were almost the same height when I was barefoot, Cheryl was not a short woman, and was wearing a pair of those high cork sandal thingies.

"You're a pretty boy." She said, "One of the prettiest boys in school."

"Thank you."

"Shut up." Cheryl said tersely, "If I need you to make noise, I'll do THIS!"

She squeezed my testicles hard enough to make me grunt in surprise and my knees buckle a bit.

"Do you know why I can do this Thad?"

I immediately shook my head 'no', I had gotten the message and the threat implied in how she held my nuts.

"I can do this," once again she squeezed my nuts, but not as hard, so there was no pain, but I instinctively gasped.

"I can do that because I own you, isn't that correct?"

I nodded an affirmative.

"That makes you my slave, and me, your owner. It is the nature of slaves to do whatever their mistress tells them to do, and to endure whatever treatment the mistress decides is appropriate. Correct?"

Again, I nodded a 'yes'.

"You embarrassed me at the library today, and I don't EVER want that to happen again, and I want you to feel the same way." Cheryl walked over to the kitchen chair and sat down.

"You are going to get a spanking, get across my knees."

I started to say something to object, but she silenced me with a look, "Good slaves know when to shut up and listen. I am going to train you to be a very good slave. Now get across my knee."

I can't begin to describe the mix of emotions that were coursing through me at that moment. I felt bad for having failed to live up to my promise to Cheryl; and my punishment seemed a reasonable response.

And it was a fact that this was a scenario I had fantasized about from my earliest memories. I was eager to experience the feeling of being so completely controlled by a beautiful young woman that she could punish me in this way.

But on the other hand, I could feel the loss of masculinity, and the humiliation of allowing this to occur. But on the OTHER, other hand, there was the fact that I was so in love with Cheryl that if this was required to make her feel happy and complete, I wanted to do it regardless of my own wants and desires in the matter. I saw it as an act of love and devotion.

Slowly, I lay across her lap, my semi erect penis trapped between her knees while my scrotum was squeezed out the back of my thighs. I felt very vulnerable and exposed.

Cheryl cleared her throat, "I've been reading up on 'all this' for the last couple of weeks, and once you wade through all the porn, fantasy stuff, there are a few women led relationship internet sites that actually offer what seems to be reasonable advice."

She placed her right hand on my ass and started rubbing it. "And one bit of advice that seems pretty consistent is that the woman needs to assert her authority whenever her man challenges her position, and there is no question that your failure to obey me in the library was a challenge, so I am going to spank you."

Cheryl sounded nervous, "This isn't going to be erotic in any way. It's going to be a real spanking, it's gonna hurt if I do it properly. Do you understand?"

I thought about it briefly. I'm not very tall, but I'm pretty tough. I've studied competitive Taekwondo and Aikido since I was a small child.

Plus, I had older brothers, so I was no stranger to pain. I thought about Cheryl's general athletic ability and while she was fairly fit, I didn't really think she could hurt me to any significant degree.

Oh, a spanking from her would hurt, but I didn't really believe she could push me beyond my limits to endure. So, I nodded a 'yes' since she told me not to speak.

"You can speak, if you want." she said.

I said, "I understand, and even agree with your punishment plans to some extent. I did violate our agreement, after all. I do want to stress though that had I been given some warning as to what you would ask of me, I doubt this would be necessary."

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