I Want to Watch

I want to watch you have an orgasm.

It's really that simple.

I don't mean I want to watch your face while you come... I have seen that countless times over the many years we've been together. I mean I want to watch the rest of you.

I want to watch you masturbate to orgasm. From beginning to end. From starting to get hard to a shooting climax, and everything in between. It seems almost impossible, but in all this time it's never happened -- I've never gotten to watch.

To be fair, one of the reasons I've never seen you come, never watched your hard cock erupt, is that I am usually too impatient to have you inside me. Because really, is there anything better than a simultaneous climax during sex? It's fucking amazing, and I suspect that we have experienced it far more often than our fair share.

But I want to watch. I fantasize about watching you. I have asked, more than once, but you're oddly private about the act of masturbation. I used to be, but I have done this for you before. The first time I asked to watch you, I offered to go first.

So, I have slipped my hand between my legs while you watched, pushing down through my panties to put pressure against my clit. Moving my fingers to shift that pressure in a grinding motion -- I could get off grinding on you fully clothed back when we were dating, and probably still could. I have moved to slide my hand inside my panties and into my slit, making sounds as I brushed against my clit. The panties came off, leaving me able to open my legs and let you watch me slide one finger down to pick up lubrication, and then back up to slide gently against my clit.

You have watched as I picked up speed, with my middle finger hidden by flesh and touching my clit, and my index and ring fingers pressing outside. You have seen me lose myself in the moment, not just moving my hand but moving my hips as if you were riding me, caught in the pleasure, until I came, clasping my thighs around my hand and curling in on myself. I don't remember if I was loud, but I remember that you've watched me pleasure myself. More than once.

So, it's your turn. It's past your turn. I want to see what you do. I want to see what you like, how you hold your cock when you want to get off. How you stroke yourself. How you touch yourself while you're still soft, or only half hard.

God, nothing gets me going more than feeling you get hard, in my hand, or pressed up against me. Feeling every twitch from you, and feeling it echoed in a pulse between my legs. It's going to be difficult to watch you without interfering. But that's why I think you have to do this from start to finish... because if I help out -- holding your cock while you get hard, rolling your balls in my hands, gently tugging on them, or taking you into my mouth to lick and suck you until you're fully erect -- well, I know where that will end, and it won't be with me just watching you.

We can start by kissing -- I could kiss you all day -- and then I want to watch you reach into your boxers and start stroking. And then, when the boxers come off, I want to see if you use two hands, one to cup your balls and the other to stroke your hard shaft. I want to see if you use lube, or lotion, or just the precum that leaks from the tip of your hard cock as you get more excited. Do you spend extra time on the head, making a circle of your thumb and one finger to ride up and down over the ridge? Do you use a light touch with fingertips underneath and thumb on top, and stroke the shaft from base to tip in a tease? Or do you use your fist to grip tighter, using more pressure to make it feel more like you're inside me, pumping fast and hard?

And most of all -- oh, most of all -- I want to watch you climax. I want to see you lose control, no longer caring that I'm watching you. Maybe forgetting that I'm there entirely. I want to see you not just stroking yourself, but reaching the point where you're pumping your hips to fuck your hand, desperate to come. And then, finally, ejaculating, climaxing, coming, sending semen arcing out of the head of your cock, landing in your chest hair, on your stomach, running over your hand and down your shaft as you finish stroking through the orgasm.

That's what I want.