iDaddy Ch. 01

MAIN CHARACTERS

Carly Cheyenne Shay

Freddie Bensen

Sam Puckett

Spencer Shay

Gibby Gibson

Grandad Shay

Shelby Marx

Bethany Hamilton

Ms. Briggs

Principal Franklin

CHAPTER 1

It was Friday morning, and Sam Puckett ran breathlessly into the Shay apartment. Carly's older brother, Spencer Shay was sitting at the kitchen counter, watching the computer screen, where the iCarly web show would be broadcasting live in fifteen minutes. He was drinking some kind of thick smoothie with a very weird color. Sam stopped at the foot of the stairs, and backtracked to where Spencer sat sipping his smoothie.

"Hey, Spencer?" asked Sam.

"Yuh-huh?"

"What in God's name are you drinking?"

He showed it to her proudly, as if hosting Let's Make A Deal. "A Kiwi-lime protein shake blended with ever-so-sweet-and-salty sweet potato fries."

"Huh," said Sam, interested Then without a second's hesitation, she took it from him, and took a sip. "Thanks."

Smoothie in hand, Sam hurried up the stairs. Spencer just watched her go as if she'd just stolen his new puppy. "She just stole my Kiwi-lime protein shake blended with ever-so-sweet-and-salty sweet potato fries," he said sadly, already missing the sweet and salty goodness.

Upstairs in the loft where Sam and her best friends Carly Shay and Freddy Bensen shot their web show, iCarly, Sam burst in the door. She took a sip of her new shake, and said. "Thank God. He isn't here, yet."

Carly just looked at her funny. "What are you drinking?"

"A Kiwi-lime protein shake blended with ever-so-sweet-and-salty sweet potato fries."

"Where did you -"

"Spencer," they said together.

"Freddy should be here any minute," Carly said excitedly.

"Is our guest here?" asked Sam.

"She's in the bathroom," Carly told her.

"You know," Sam said, as she pulled the lid off the shake and chugged the rest of it down. I still can't believe it's actually happening."

"I know," Carly said. "Freddy's finally 18! Now it won't be the weird She's-eighteen-and-her-boyfriend's-only-seventeen."

"Truuuue..." said Sam slowly. "But you know that's not what I'm talking about."

Carly's face fell. "I know. But I'm worried he'll be really upset when I tell him."

Sam laughed. "Are you kidding? The kid's been crazy about you since Kindergarten. He's gonna love being a -"

She immediately shut up as Freddy walked in with a big smile.

"Hey, Fredward," said Sam teasingly. "You better watch out for rats with a grin full of that much cheese."

He ignored her - something he got surprisingly very good at it - and walked over to Carly. He kissed her passionately, and Sam grimaced. "Okay, break it up, guys. You get yourselves a room while I go find me a barf bag."

Freddy just grinned at her. "Jealous?"

"Oh, yeah," said Sam sarcastically. "There's nothing I would love more than having your tongue shoved down my throat. And just FYI, the show starts in, like thirty seconds."

"Crap," said Freddy, totally having forgotten the time. Hell, when he was kissing Carly, he forgot his own name. That's what made him so excited about what he was planning. He hurried over to his sweet, high-tech filming gear, as Sam and Carly got in their places. He started the countdown. "In 5...4...3...2...1...!" He hit the record button, and the show was on.

"Hi," said Carly. "I'm the lovable Carly!"

"And I'm the hateable Sam!"

"This can be true."

Chiming in together, they said, "And this is iCarly!"

"As promised," said Carly, "we have a big surprise today!"

"Huge!" added Sam.

"As a lot of you may or may not have heard," said Carly, "on Halloween of 2003, a young surfer girl lost her arm to a huge tiger shark!"

"Halloween people," Sam chimed in. "Talk about irony!"

"Well that surfer girl happens to be a huge fan of iCarly, and is here today! Give a huge hand for -"

"Bethany Hamilton!" chimed Carly and Sam together. Freddy quickly pushed the button that made a sound like people cheering. Then a tall blonde girl in a white sundress walked in, all smiles. Her left arm is gone, revealing just a stump.

"Hey, guys!" said Bethany excitedly. She hugged Sam and Carly with a big smile. She faced Freddy and the camera. "I am so stoked to be a guest on iCarly! I have been a dedicated fan since the very beginning."

"So, Beth," said Sam. "What is it like only having one arm?"

"Sam!" admonished Carly. "That is so rude!"

"No," Bethany cut in. "It's okay." She turned to Sam. "Well, Sam. It's very different than having two, that's for sure." The girls laughed. Even Freddy cracked a smile. "When I first came out of surgery, the doctor told me that the list of things I'd have to learn to do differently was very extensive. And he was right. Everything that came so easily to me all my life was extremely difficult with only one arm to work with. I mean, fixing your hair isn't exactly rocket science. Unless you only have one arm. Then it seems like the cow will jump over the moon before you can even make a simple ponytail."

They all laughed at that. Even Freddy was cracking up."

"So," Carly said. "I heard you recently had a baby." Freddy's smile lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Yes, I did," said Bethany. "I have an amazing baby boy, and a husband sent straight from Heaven."

At that, Freddy walked from around the camera with a big smile. "Can I say something?"

"Of course," said Carly.

Freddy faced the camera. "As many of our viewers know, Carly and I have been dating for almost a year now." He smiled at Carly. "I've been gathering up the courage all morning, and now I think it's time."

"Time for what?" Carly asked.

"What are you yapping about, now?" asked Sam.

Freddy cleared his throat. "Carly," he said. "I love you more than life itself, and by some miracle sent from all of my Guardian Angels, you love me that way, too." Sam made gagging sounds, but sheepishly stopped at the withering glare from Bethany. "So now there's one thing left to do."

Sam's eyes went wide. "You're not about to -"

Freddy pulled a small velvet case from his jeans pocket. Carly looked ready to faint. Bethany looked so happy, it was a wonder she didn't explode. Freddy got down on one knee. "Carly Cheyenne Shay, will you marry me?"

Downstairs, Spencer sprayed his new Kiwi-lime protein shake blended with ever-so-sweet-and-salty sweet potato fries all over the computer screen.

On the set of iCarly, emotions were all over the place! Freddy felt nervous enough to piss his pants. Sam felt more shocked than if she'd survived the electric chair. Bethany was so happy, tears were making her mascara run. And Carly felt so excited she wanted to start belting out Britney Spears.

"Yes," Carly said. "Of course I will."

Freddy put the diamond ring on her left ring finger. He stood up and - on live broadcast - kissed his new fiance.

"Well," said Sam, facing the camera. "That's all for today's show!" She looked at the happy couple still kissing. "And I guess we'll have to stick around until our tech geek finishes eating Carly's face."

"And just so you know," Freddy said as he pulled away - completely forgetting they were still live - "I'm not proposing just because you're pregnant."

Carly's eyes went wide. "You know about that?"

"Yup," said Freddy happily.

"How?"

"I saw a pregnancy test in your trash can when I went to use your bathroom last week. I knew there was no way in Hell Sam was pregnant."

"Damn straight," Sam muttered.

"And I remembered last month's activities that aren't suitable discussion in front of our guest." Bethany laughed. "And I did the math."

"Well," Sam said. "I guess the baby's outta the womb on that one."

"Thanks for the imagery, Sam," said Carly.

"Anytime."

Suddenly, Bethany stepped forward to hug Carly. "Congratulations, Carly."

"Thank you so much."

"And I'd better get going," Bethany said. "I've got a heat coming up next week that I need to practice for."

"We'll be rooting for you," said Carly.

"Surf's up, dude," Sam pitched in.

"Thank you guys so much," she said, giving all three teens a big hug. Then she turned to the camera. "And thank you all for tuning in to iCarly today. See ya."

"Crap!" said Freddy, as Bethany turned to leave. "The camera!" He rushed over to shut it off. "My mom always watches -"

There was suddenly a loud BANG! as the studio door flew open. "FREDWARD BENSEN!!"

Freddy's overprotective mother stood in the doorway, her face red as a fresh apple.

"Aw, crap!" Freddy whimpered.