It's All About the Panties

This is a redacted version of a longer story removing discussion of how and when a life long fetish may have developed. Although no underage sexual correspondents were described in the original, other than perhaps kissing at the age of 16, because the story is all about a fetish which is sexual in nature, I acknowledge it must have contained an underage sexual element. Since this is a fictional story and not a psychology 101 essay I have redacted the paragraphs I think were probably inappropriate.

I am now posting this version in the Crossdressers category where I believe at least some of the readership may relate to the story and may have their own memories to fill in some of the missing bits.

I did attempt to contact several volunteer editors whose profiles showed they were willing to assist reviewing story content, rather than just spelling and grammar, but so far I have been unsuccessful in finding an editor that has replied to a request for assistance.

This is a fictional story. All actors in this version were late developers and didn't even get a first kiss before the age of 18.

*****

It's All About The Panties - No Penis envy

Having been born in and growing up during the 1950's I have memories of ladies everyday fashions that were normal and conservative then, but today are considered somewhat as fetish wear.

Some of my earliest memories include being with my mother in a department store while she selected stockings at the hosiery counter. I was fascinated at the time by the glass cabinet full of colorfully boxed product with pretty patterns and images on the lids and watching the pretty sales staff extol the virtues of each brand.

At some point I became consciously aware that for some reason I actually liked looking at girls and although I never got a "Birds and the Bees" talk I eventually worked out it was "The birds and the birds and the bees and the bees".

Attending an all boys school and not having any sisters there were limited opportunities for me to discover much detail about girls. The arrival of a television at home significantly improved things as I got to watch variety programs with their dancing girls clothed in an array of exotic and skimpy outfits. I also found out about attractive American Moms from TV serials.

I guess I became a geek and a chronic masturbater. I wasn't always thinking about girls while I was at it, I was mostly simply enjoying the activity for it's own reward, a pastime I pursued mostly in the shower so there was little evidence of what was going on, other than me taking a long time in the bathroom.

In those days the only porn readily available was occasional access to Playboy. I couldn't see the point of the articles so I just studied the pictures and to this day I still have a vision of Playboy bunny girls having a particular size and shape breast that's never actually seen in the wild.

At some point I came across a series of British magazines called Spick, Span and Beautiful Britons. These were little pocket sized magazines of black and white pictures of the girl next door types, lifting their skirts and showing off their stocking tops or disrobing to display the rest of their skimpy and lacy underwear. I fell hook line and sinker then for European girls and lingerie. I also realized that large breasts weren't the primary object that attracted my attention. I liked cute bums in panties and started to forget about pneumatic boobed American girls with overbites and toothy smiles.

Two major fashion events came along to change the world about then, mini skirts and pantyhose. One major plus, one major let down.

I obviously continued my bathroom activities during these years with increasing passion and I maintained a small stash of Beautiful Britons in my secret hiding place for inspiration.

Towards the end of my High School years I got my first kiss. I realized I had found something else that was competitive with the rapture of wanking. The following years went by, going through the motions with different girls from groping, frottage, heavy petting and on to the eventual grand final event. It was a good time, perhaps slower developing than many, but good nevertheless. Progressing from High School to University was memorable for some of the more intense experiences, including the obligatory first very very broken heart, but overall somehow all anti climatic.

One day, some months into my first job, it all changed. It happened during one of our regular project meetings with the staff squeezed into a small project room. One of the girls on the team was about my age, attractive, and we got on well together but were otherwise just casual colleagues. That day in the project meeting a little catalyst seed was inadvertently dropped into the mix.

I was sitting on the floor on one side of the room and she was over against the other wall sitting on a desk. As I was looking in her general direction I happened to glance across as she drew her feet up onto the table and rested her chin on her knees. She was wearing a blue gingham frock and as her legs went up and her skirt hem fell I got a flash of hot pink shiny satin panties. It was totally unintentional and I think I was the only one in a position to notice, but I was transfixed and heard nothing more of the project meeting after that. I kept on swinging my gaze to admire the most wonderful view I was getting. The hot pink panties, tanned thighs and blue skirt was a magical combination. I think at some point she realized I was perving up her skirt, but didn't make any sudden move to rearrange anything. I think it was more out of embarrassment and not wanting to draw further attention to herself rather than cock teasing, but eventually she did shift her legs and flattened the skirt to her thighs. It was the closest thing I'd come to in real life of an experience that compared to flicking through the pages of a Spick and Span magazine and it had the same effect on me. I was hooked.

We subsequently spent more than the necessary amount of time working together and started spending time together socially outside of work hours as well. Being naturally shy it took some time before I was brave enough to plant the first kiss. By then the pent up sexual tension made that first kiss a truly existential experience and it wasn't long before we were in bed.

Following a change of project and a city transfer we decided to live together for a while. The major change for couples of that age was the ready availability of contraception. The pill made living together a workable option without committing to marriage. On a sexual level things just seemed to progress naturally for us from simple bonking to various levels of what some might say was aberrant behavior. Porn still wasn't readily available and we really didn't need it for inspiration. I do now wonder how relationships develop these days when young people are pre primed by easy access to heavy duty online porn. By comparison our sexual progression probably now seems rather tame.

Eventually I told her about my old British magazine collection, which I had long since lost, and confessed my attraction to stockings. Although never having worn them before herself she eagerly purchased suspenders and stockings and we started having exciting semi clothed sex.

Panties also became a regular item added to the mix as my stiff cock got wrapped in a pair and she slid them up and down learning the skills of a great hand job.

One day with my girlfriend's encouragement we decided I should wear the stockings for a change. Her panties didn't fit me, but the suspender belt, stockings and a very elastic bra did. It turned into a long and multi orgasmic evening. We were both very tired and sore the next morning.

The magazine racks in most outlets were by now stuffed with a lot more explicit open leg stuff. The British mags were still available at some smaller stockists and I was lucky one day to stumble across a couple and I was treated again to the fun of flicking through the pages of upskirt teases, mostly wearing stockings, but also now interspersed with some pantyhose shots.

Although keeping true to their original style there had been subtle changes to the models over the years. Where the original mainstay had been pictures of everyday girls showing off their own underwear, now it was decidedly fetish with the models clearly dressed specifically for the photo shoot. The easy give away was models wearing panties under their suspender straps rather than a more functional over the suspenders arrangement. There also seemed to be some confusion by the girls over whether to wear panties under or over pantyhose. The publishers had otherwise chosen to keep true to their original theme and declined to meet the explicit market in any significant way. Sadly it was to lead to their eventual demise as a publication shortly thereafter.

My girlfriend's job involved working shifts and this week she was on the evening swing shift. When I came home one afternoon she broached the subject of the magazines as she had come across them while doing some tidying up. It turned out she was keen to do some similar modeling and suggested we make plans for the following weekend. She particularly wanted to try some pictures of her showing her hitched up skirt and stocking tops alighting from a car.

While discussing things she made the point to me quite strongly that what I had previously described to her about the magazines was wrong. I was confused. She said I had told her the old mags I liked were all about stockings, but she now insisted they were all about the panties. I was dumbfounded. We went through each magazine page by page and she rightly pointed out that every picture was focused on the panties. From fully dressed girls simply pulling their skirt hems up just far enough to show off a peek of panties and stocking tops to the topless girls naked except for just a pair of panties. She was of course correct and I was again admiring all those smooth shape crotches covered in a mesmerizing selection of differently textured fabrics. It really was all about the panties.

As she went off to work that evening she teasingly said she had a special surprise for me tomorrow. I went to bed wondering what it would be and wanked myself to sleep laying on my stomach sliding my cock animatedly against the bed sheets, imagining her giving me a special upskirt show.

In the morning I had breakfast, jumped in the shower and started to get dressed for work. When I opened my underwear drawer I saw it had been raided! All my jocks had been removed and replaced by three new pairs of panties. Three different sizes and styles. First a really cute white satin full brief pair embroidered all over with little red, blue and pink flowers. Then there was a sensible pale blue cotton high cut bikini brief and finally a provocative see through black pair made from a patterned gauze like fabric on the front and a sheer nylon tail.

After a short break to take stock of the situation I had little hesitation before choosing the embroidered white satin pair and finished dressing and went off to work.

It would be an understatement for me to say I was distracted that day. I quickly found a major problem wearing girls panties as my semi hard cock dribbled and subsequently dried a bit and glued the eye of my penis to the material, which hurt to release and then as I kept dribbling the wet spot also started to grow. I resolved matters by wrapping a tissue around my cock head before things became obvious on the outside of my chinos. The absorbent panty gusset is obviously in the wrong spot for a guy. I needed a front panel. I resolved to wear the more all over absorbent cotton bikini tomorrow. It never occurred to me that I would not be wearing panties again and to ask where my old undies might have gone.

By the time I got home I had a raging hard on. I wasn't however dreaming of a fuck. When I got though the door she was standing in the hallway wearing a tunic style dress and I immediately pressed her up against the wall, dropped to my knees and pulled off her panties as she stood there speechless. I wanted to worship her pussy. I buried my head under the skirt and started working my tongue up and down her pussy lips, trying to get it as far up inside her as I could manage, which was easy as she was as wet as I was horny and had apparently been turned on all day as well. I licked and licked and sucked on her clit, not stopping as she came twice and I continued to lap up pussy juices that got creamier and creamier. When I eventually stopped I looked up at her and she was looking down at me awestruck. I dried my face on my sleeve and stood up to kiss her, but she went all shy and turned away.

I gently turned her head towards me, again intending to get the kiss I wanted, but she whispered something in a croaky voice that I missed and had to ask to repeat. A little louder she asked me again if I would wank into her panties.

I was slightly surprised but didn't think much of it as I reached down, picked the discarded item off the floor and wrapped them around my cock. After all, she had been giving me hand jobs using her silk panties for some time now and I though she just wanted to watch me now do it to myself.

"No" she whispered and again went all shy. She took the panties from me and put them on again and held the waist band out. "Will you cum in my panties?" she asked a little more suggestively. I obliged by wanking furiously and shot a huge load into the gusset.

You can't go to work like that now, I said, but her reply was just an impish grin as she took another pair of panties, stuck on a panty liner and pulled them over the first pair.

She kissed me at the door and went off to work with a huge smile on her face.

As I pondered the events of the day I realized how much I wanted to continue worshiping that pussy as well as how much I enjoyed the concept of wearing panties. I had physically enjoyed the feel of the light weight material compared to my usual heavy duty cotton gear. I also enjoyed the sensation of the panty compressing my cock and balls slightly since the cut made no allowance for male anatomy. Weirdly at the same time there was a psychological effect. Wearing panties just felt right. Denying the very existence of that piece of me was somehow liberating.

I had another erection already and couldn't think of much else that evening other than waiting for my girlfriend to finish her shift and get home so we could bonk till the sun came up. As much as I loved wearing panties, I definitely still wanted to keep my package.

Wearing panties that day took me back to my 4 year old self. I wondered what Sigmund Freud would have thought. He had a theory of 4 year old girls developing penis envy, but it occurred to me I had apparently been afflicted at that same age with a life long no-penis envy!

I wondered if or when I'd return to wearing normal underwear as there was still an obvious absorbency issue to attend to. I again thought the cotton bikini would probably work out OK for tomorrow, but the sheer black number was going to be a problem, until the solution came to me suddenly as I thought about the load my girlfriend was now wearing. Apparently panty liners were going to be my next best friend.