It's My Cock, Doc

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He visits the most prominent cock doctor in the state.
1.6k words
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I have to admit, the doctor's office was discreetly located down a back hall on a nondescript floor of an average professional building. When I entered the building I could have been coming for any range of medical problems, so my specific problem remained a deep secret.

The name on the directory board simply listed Doctor Magnum – Plastic Surgery and showed his room number as 506. So when I entered the glass elevator and pressed "five" no one knew I was going to see the most prominent cock doctor in the state.

As a plastic surgeon he did a lot more than just cocks, but his specialty was penile enlargement, so while he would definitely work on breast enhancements, breast reductions, face lifts and tummy tucks, it was the penile enhancement that made him his money. It was for this reason that I found myself stepping off the elevator on the fifth floor and wandering the maze of hallway to office 506.

I arrived early for the appointment so the pretty blond receptionist directed me to a comfortable couch and handed me a clipboard with a bunch of paperwork to fill out. I looked her over closely, as she walked seductively back to her desk, trying to figure out what work the doctor had completed on her. Though she was still young, perhaps just in her thirties, her breasts were large and still very firm. Looking at her face, she also seemed to have a perfectly proportioned nose and a cute little chin.

While I answered a few questions on the forms the receptionist had given me, I mentally filled out a checklist on her, checking off breast enhancement, nose job and chin work. Perhaps I was being harsh, perhaps her beauty was a natural thing, it's just that her looks simply seemed too good.

Of course I came to the doctor for a different reason than pure vanity, I came here to have him fix a genuine serious medical condition. It was a condition that first only affected my sex life, but soon it destroyed my self esteem and damn near ruined my life.

Finishing up the paperwork, I got up and then handed the completed set of forms to the receptionist. She instructed me to, "...go ahead and have a seat for a more few moments."

Walking away from her desk, I grabbed the closest seat and opened up a magazine, leafing through the pictures. After a few minutes the receptionist looked over at me and said, "The doctor will see you now."

A nurse met me at the door and, after recording my weight, directed me into "Exam Room Number Four." Once inside, I leapt up on a table and waited a bit more. The nurse came back in and took my blood pressure, my temperature and counted off my pulse rate. Once she finished she led me out of the exam room directly into the doctor's office.

"He doesn't want to examine me?"

"The doctor said he wanted to talk with you a bit before starting any medical investigation, sort of a history."

"Is this normal?"

"It happens a lot, sometimes he likes to discuss options prior to examination. You can sit there in that chair, he'll be here in just a moment."

I sat for several minutes looking over all the doctor's diplomas, certificates and recognitions, including photographs of him shaking the hands of several different Presidents. Yes, this man was the foremost in his field, if you believed everything on the walls and everything I had ever heard about him.

Looking down at his enormous desk, I was surprised how neat it was, with one or two sheets of paper stacked neatly in his in box, a few more in his out box and a file in the middle of his desk. The file read Sheik, Harold R., my file.

"Ah Mr. Sheik, I am sorry I kept you waiting. I hope it wasn't too long."

"No, no, but I was wondering why..." he stopped me by holding up his hand and nodding his head.

"Before we got started on any clinical work I wanted to talk to you some. You see, as a leading plastic surgeon specializing in sexual organs I come across some strange requests, along with a lot of repairing of some very odd accidents, but your request caught me off guard.

"With the strange requests I get, I want to spend a little more time talking to the patient to make sure he or she is intent on the surgery requested. And, if you excuse my bluntness, your request made me wonder if perhaps you were mocking me or my patients."

"Mocking you, how?"

"Well sir, I work with often very distraught men whom, for whatever reason, were born with small organs and then you come in here requesting what you have and, well it's seems a mockery."

"No, doctor, I am totally serious, this is ruining my life and I need to get something done."

"Look, why don't you tell me how it affects you and I'll then decide what we can do."

I looked down at the ground, noticing the plush carpet for the first time, a beautiful maroon with light tan fibers running through it. Moving my feet over the soft material, I took a deep breath and said, "It's my cock, doc.

"You've heard that as we age, the nose and ears tend to keep growing. That's why old men have such large ears and noses, they keep growing where the rest of the body slows down. Well that has happened to me, but instead of my ears or nose, it was my cock.

"I mean I hit eighteen and my body reached about my full height and though I bulked up over the next few years, essentially I had stopped growing by then. My cock didn't stop and so while I was pretty normal when I was eighteen, it continued getting longer and longer.

"Sure it was great when I was in my twenties and it ran past seven inches. I started attracting women, I guess they talk about these things or something, because one after another they seemed to flock to me. As I hit about twenty-seven or so, I topped eight inches and by thirty I was nearly ten inches long.

"What was nice in my mid-twenties began dragging me down some, as I started scaring some of the women off. At a time I wanted to think about settling down, the women I were with were questioning the sanity of spending the rest of their lives being pummeled by a monster cock. And hell I didn't tell them it was still growing.

"Here I was pushing thirty-five and the only women who would even think about sex with me were either adventure seekers or the high priced ultra kinky hookers. By forty, all the hookers in town knew about me and my seventeen inch cock and I simply couldn't afford them.

"Figuring guys might go for the ultra large cock, so at forty-five or so I hit a few gay bars, but whenever I went home with a guy, they'd see my twenty inches and simply laugh. When I finally did hook up with one big guy with an enormous ass, I ran into another problem. He was large enough to take me and enjoyed my size, but I had reached the point that when I got an erection, so much blood was in my cock I'd pass out.

"Now I overcame that for a while when I quit taking my blood pressure medicine, but soon that was still not enough. I started popping Viagra like gumdrops and eating massive amounts of salt for every meal."

"And you are what, fifty now?" the doctor asked.

"Yes, fifty," I replied.

"Are you still with your partner?"

"He's in the hospital, but I don't think he will be coming back."

"Why is that?"

"Well last time we had sex, he was giving me a blowjob and his hand slipped off my cock just as I was coming and well it started flailing about like a fire hose and damn near bludgeoned him to death. He was in a coma for two days and I was thrown in jail until he was able to explain to police that I didn't beat him with a baseball bat.

"With him gone, I would have gone back to masturbating, but even with the Viagra I will nearly pass out when I get hard. I don't dare come because I am afraid I'll lose control of my cock and beat myself to death. It has been a long time since I had sex, a real long time.

"Last night I had a sexy dream and damn near got my cock tangled in the ceiling fan. I deathly fear having a wet dream and drowning myself while I sleep. Doc, you got to help me."

"Okay, I guess I need to see what we are talking about, can you take it out for me."

"Right here?"

"Yes, just put it on the desk there."

I pulled it out but it slipped from my hands and slammed onto his desk, cracking in down the middle. The head of my cock thumped the doctor in the chest and knocked him back into his chair.

"I see what you mean Mr. Sheik," he lifted the receiver to his phone and said, "Kelly, please have Nurse Trojan come to my office immediately."

In just a second, the door opened and an attractive, but very tall nurse stepped into the room. "Janet, please schedule operating two for immediate, emergency surgery."

"Yes doctor," she replied, then looking down at his desk, she gasped, "Oh my..."

"Ah Janet, on second thought, schedule both operating rooms two and three for this one."

The nurse nodded, glanced back at my cock and then rushed through the door.

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5 Comments
GratefulFredGratefulFredover 16 years ago

Loved the perilous ceiling fan part above all. Wonderfully delicious tale indeed. Keep on plugging the humor as I do need some company.

asiaprofasiaprofover 17 years ago
What a wacky sense of humour!

Just perfect!

AnonymousAnonymousover 17 years ago
OMFG!

If he didn't have the surgery, he could use it as a belt. If he used it as a scarf, he'd strangle himself when he passed a porno store!

normiquenormiqueover 17 years ago
I smiled throught the whole thing!

What a delicious sense of humor this writer has! A well put together story, but I wonder what the character was like after the surgery and what did the doc do with what he removed? Were there men with small cocks waiting in the wings for the 'left overs?' A delightful read.

duddle146duddle146over 17 years ago
Hilariously Funny!

Geez! - what a barrel of laughs this story was. This Writer approaches the Borders of Outrageous without fear and dares to go where few have gone before - straight for the funny bone.

Delightful Read! Terrifically funny!

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