All Comments on 'It's My Party'

Awesome, well written. I didnt want to stop reading it. Hoping for more sometime.

I came here for the usual reason people check out Literotica--but I was in for a very pleasant surprise when my casual porn read turned into a multi-day obsession! I got to the point where I wasn't even interested in the sex scenes. I love the character development, scenery descriptions, technology use...everything! I've read novels that aren't nearly this good. This story deserves to be in bookshelves next to Arthur C. Clarke and Steven Baxter's Time Odyssey series. If you ever publish a book or series, mark me down as eager to buy every single one!

This probably isn't the response one seeks on such a website, but I think that with the sex tuned down even more (anda hell of a lot of revision for continuity and basic typos) this is publishable. And widely readable.

Try for it.

I like many others come to this site for short term sexual stimulation. This work was remarkable!!! I could not stop reading it. I can't wait to read your other work, that was referenced in other feedback. Please consider publishing your work in a way that would benefit yourself financially. I would have no problem paying to read the stories that someone of your talent has written. Good luck with your future projects. If you decide to publish elsewhere in the future please let the readers of this site know about it. Good luck and thank you for a very enjoyable story.

Great work! All the mathematical jargon and sexual references aside, this could have easily been a scifi best seller!

Seriously, when I first saw that this story was 110 pages long, I'd never thought I'd read it all. But you had me, and I enjoyed it very much! The way you can combine real world situations in outer spaces, future or other sci fi places, it's totally awesome! Thank you!

It should be in the Novels/Novellas instead of illustrated section

OMG, my mind is blown! This story was so vivid and intricate, I just couldn't stop reading! The portrayal of emotions and thought processes was very well-written and added so much more to the plot. All of the dynamics of the human (and not-so-human) psyche were riveting. I have nothing but praise for you!

Seriously, I thought this would be just another "we're all that's left, let's have sex ALL the time" thing. This was amazing. I was very surprised, happily so! This is a beautiful story, full of interweaving intricacies and stories, blended well together to bring it to a whole separate level of reading. The math and architecture parts were a bit difficult to read through but it adds intelligence to the whole work. Well written and I hope you'll continue to write, either a sequel to this one or a whole new work.

One of the best stories I've read in a while.

I know that all of the comments above me are nothing but praise, and you should publish this, but I wanted to chime in and agree. The world that you created was amazing. I didn't want this to end, and would love if nothing an epilogue, but you should really turn this into a series. I never thought I would find such an amazing read on literotica. You are an amazing writer, and while I did not understand a lot (any) of the math, it shows that you have knowledge of content, and that I admire. You should be published so that your gift can be shared.

the best story I have read in a long time! This has been the cause of many late nights. Well done

Well written; a real page-turner. Some of the math in here gets a little hairy, even for a math major in college, but cool concepts. Hard to imagine most of the characters were sharp enough to follow this.

Do you have a sequel in the works? Endless possibilities from where you left off...

The only way this could be better is if I could get it as an ebook! Love it

ive just finished reading this for the third time lol i read it once before about a year or so ago and was totaly captivated by the depth of the characters and the absolute beauty of the world you created. "a real page turner" is a monumental understatement

this story a pure diamond in the rough for literotica i enjoyed most of the sex scenes and you did a very good job portraying how cruel people really can be too eachother i hope to read some more of your works in the future

Amazingly Lovely Series. i admist i started it for the "illistraded sex" i thought would appear, but when i started realy reading it i got hooked on how real and captivating it was, then i noticed the lovely 100+ pages. i must say see if you could get this and/or a series published! if you have read the "ghost" Or most commonely called Paladin Of Shadows series by John Ringo you know this could be published even as it is now, theres so much more that could be done and feel so real in this it would be a shame for it to only hide here!

I thoroughly enjoyed this story. Though it was lengthy, I decided to make use of the bookmarks in my browser to save my place and return to the captivating story whenever my schedule blessed me with such time. I rate this 100% because though the quantity of pages is a lot, the quality of each of the 110 pages is remarkable.

I scrolled through 25 pages before losing patience: the only illustrations so far were 3 maps!

After that I just jumped to the end to give a 1 bomb and this comment.

Under a different category, this might have been worth reading - I don't know.

As an Illustrated story, it sucks, big time!

Pull it all and resubmit under a different category is what I say.

f5

I started this just browsing lazily through the illustrated sex hall of fame but very soon came to realize it was so much more than that. This is a deeply and intricately constructed story that stands on its own merits - I found it reminiscent of Larry Niven's Ring World, but in some ways much more original and clever. I thoroughly enjoyed the details of this puzzle world and the sense of unfolding discovery as the story progresses. I really, really do not understand complaints about length or chapters.

This story is truly a gem, if this where a print book, i would buy it in a heartbeat, i sat down for a erotic story, but found so much more... Truly, excellent work!

A wonderful story, and a great piece of fiction. I would definitely love a copy of this story to add to my library. It is definitely a story I will want to re read

I thought this was a great story and I had a hard time putting it down. I liked it being all in one and not have different chapters because it seems to break up the flow. The imagery was outstanding and I could feel myself there and seeing the wonders of this unique world frankly by page 4 I was hooked. I thought the blend of syfy and survival issues/instinct were compelling and very surreal.

Found the story compelling and had to read to the end. Found the future aspects interesting.

What a waste.

Oh, yes, excellent read. And yes, more than just a passable plot, interesting details, etc. Decent writing style, well-developed diction, and an interesting grasp of mathematics and physics (formed as a hobby, maybe?). I think that's just what this website needs more of.... :P

P.S. Actually, this would make a decent book. You may want to consider publication if you get any more bright ideas.

On behalf of all these stupid comments I apologize to you hammingbyrd7.

This is a great work of literature. Your words don't deserve this petty stage of a porn site. When I opened this book I had no idea it would have such a deep understanding and truth bound in it. You should mind my advice and truly go to an publisher and present this. The people who rated this zero have truly not read it or understood the time and effort put into such a long story Two thumbs up for you.

The world loves you hammingbyrd - whoever you are. Keep on writing and the non mental will keep on reading XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO... - a giant fan

Not exactly what I was expecting. Could be a good movie. Definitely not a place for it on this site.

Love the story!!!

Did not want it to stop...

You should try to get published!!

I do love your work, this and the tesseract stories are some of the better science fiction I've read anywhere, and that includes Heinlein, Asimov and Bradbury among those with whom I compare your work.

The only legitimate complaints I would have shared about this (the length is nothing, so ignore those fools complaining about it, though perhaps the marketing/categorization comments have some merit - perhaps consult someone with some SEO-type skillsets to help in this area going forward?) are about the ending seeming so slap-dash as compared to the rest of this fine bit of artwork.

I did also agree a little bit about the proffered advice from someone else to put a woman reviewer/editor/co-author on your team to help you as a sounding-board for the female side of relationship dialog sequences. The story could have benefited for a slightly wider cross-section of original party-goers too (in terms of ages/world-views/paths of study - a Lawyer's views on forming a government and/or a Historian's input would have been interesting to read).

While I found the puzzle-solving part of the story entertaining, reading through the mathematical explanations of the solutions was a little dry - having them need to explain the answers to an average High-School Jock mentality would perhaps have made some of it either more entertaining or approachable to those who didn't grok the math so quickly.

i was getting into the first page but then i scrolled down and saw 110 pages... wow... just wow. i really wanted to finished reading the story but sadly i have a very short attention span and most likely end up dumping it halfway through :/

Tone down the sex descriptions to the level of the romance genre (mainstream not literotica) and this would make a mainstream SF novel.

Yeah that was awesome... Your stories as a whole are by me considered the best on this site. This is my I don't know how manyith comment... There's usually one Fter every read... I agree that this doesn't belong on this site but mainly just because it means you aren't getting the appreciation for it. It really should be published. The length is no matter, the plot is absolutely vivid and lovable. There is a sense of righteousness present in all your books that makes them a joy to read. The characters' emotions are so pure. The mathematical concepts are an enrichment to the book, but it might need to be toned down a little, at point it detracts from the plot a very slight bit. Overall great story

I simply love it. All 150 pages. I have just started reading it for the second time and it even better.

I keep checking back to see if there are any new installments but sadly no.

Hummingbirds other other essays are just as good I have read them all.

I think it could make a TV series. But I am not sure I would cut out the sex. It a great adult adventure. Maybe a radio play if the actors voices were chosen right. .

My only criticism is why is it listed under illustration and not Sci Fi?

PLEASE WRITE MORE...

Length is unimportant in a story as good as this. Ignore those who criticize the length.

Whilst I would have liked the Chapters to start on a new page, I am pleased it was not published as chapters. It is better as one submission.

As to the maths. I think this was fine. You did not have to understand or follow the maths but great if you do. It added a quality of insight to the characters all who were University undergrad and I found this to be intellectually challenging and refreshing.

It gives some insight into the Human spirit. If I was going to populate an arc to save humanity I would chose the brightest and best selection. And the age span of the characters was as I would expect for the situation. Each at the point of their intellectual and sexual development. If I was populating Mars I would want to send people in their Twenties or early 30's.

You can kill a good story by trying to fit the stereotype mold. I just want more and I want you to be yourself.

Your a master of your craft

I'd been systematically reading my way through your writing. And was ecstatic that I "stumbled upon" this incredible sci-fi story. I was really happy that you'd gifted a full length novel to us readers.

In some of your other stories I found the characters a bit flat but in this one you explore polar opposite characters in depth to good affect. You are also superb at describing complex ideas to lay people by using characters in the novel to explore the idea in more detail. And the drawing were rather helpful in places though now you could make 3D models rather quickly which would convey what you're trying to explain rather clearly.

I agree with a former comment that with some tweaking you could pitch this idea to a network for a sci-fi series.

Thanks again for such a wonderfully comprehensive story. Top drawer!

LIAR LIAR, this is not an illustrated story your lying sack of shit. list it appropriately

Made it 6 pages in before I gave up, and that was a feat in and of itself. Not erotic, not illustrated in the sense that the category implies, and plain not interesting. You're way too enamored with your idea of this architectural fantasy. It's poorly described and far fetched, and just plain boring. sort of like what 50 shades of grey was to Twilight, your story is to Rendezvous With Rama, except that Rama, of the four pieces of writing listed is actually worth reading. You are sorely in need of an editor.

I kind of stumbled into finding this story, and I became very addicted to finishing it. It seems this was the last story you submitted some six and a half years ago, but thank you for sharing this story. From the effort and concentration you needed to complete this story, I hope some publisher or movie producer has provided you with a seven figure income to continue your art of writing!

Lesbian Lumberjack

Just looking for some casual stroke reading this day after Christmas, something relaxing, hopefully mildly entertaining, and erotically stimulating. Don't remember how I wound up here, but when I saw it is 110 pages, I've spent more time bitching here than I did trying to get into reading this. Hardly seems to fit this site.

Thank you for your story. It had me captivated and i read every word over hours and hours! Totally not what I expected to find, i honestly think if you tightened up some of the desciptions and toned down some of the sex you could publish this to great aclaim, its such a facinating concept. Im sorry about some comments you've received, they obviously didnt read the story and see the irony in their hateful intent!

I've been reading Lit stories since shortly after its' debut and one thing has stayed consistent: people are bitching whiners, (for you Brits: whingers, or how ever you spell it). It's too long, it's too short, you've publishing too much at once, you don't publish often enough. Holy effing Christ on a crutch, STFU, you mealy-mouth, complaining, self-centered fucks!

Here's some helpful advice to the complainers:

-- You don't want long stories, take your hand off your dick long enough to scroll to the bottom of the page and check the length, (having a bit of experience with the differences in male and female perspectives, I would bet not one of the complainers is female.)

-- If you want stroke material, put some time into researching and choosing your stories, otherwise every story you choose is a crap shoot, hell porn is more straight forward, and there's certainly no shortage of that on the 'net.

-- My last suggestion might be a bit 'out there' for you, but bear with me on this one. If you get a paragraph or page into a story, and it isn't what YOU thought it was, or it isn't ringin' your bell, well... how do I put this... FIND SOMETHING ELSE! You didn't pay anything for it, you only invested a bit of your time. If you're in that big of a hurry to crank one out, why the fuck are you using written material?!? (see first two suggestions)

There I feel better, and based upon YOUR philosophy, that's all that matters. So, if you don't like or agree with me, fuck off, it wasn't for you. It was for me.

(Since Ham is long gone from this place, I won't even both with the praise this incredible piece of amateur writing deserves.)

Terrible give up writing and get a job.

I like this one it was long but kept my attention. I wanted to kill quite a few of the bad guys which I assume the writer wanted.

I have chosen to submit this comment as Anonymous, rather than as my Member name, as I don't wish to deal with the hurt feelings and emails of those who may feel insulted. Been there, done that. No thanks.

It is so sad that far too many of the comments are about story length, story classification (Illustrated), and submission form. This is a free site! You have paid nothing for the chance to be titillated, aroused, and even entertained! Perhaps you're familiar with the old saying "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth." It is most apt for those complaints. For those whose comments were, to be charitable, less intellectual and more scatological, the saying "Don't throw pearls before swine" seems to fit best.

It is blindingly obvious to all regular readers that there are few writers submitting to Literotica whose work actually rises to the status of literature. Hammingbyrd7 is one of those few. I have read all of his submissions to Literotica over the years and his work is so much better than almost all of the other submissions here. He has genuine talent! He can interweave multiple plots, create believable characters, write dialogue that doesn't sound stilted, and create sex scenes that are as emotional as they are titillating.

Does his work contain flaws? Certainly. But Literotica is a great place to work out the kinks (Sorry, I just couldn't resist that!) in one's writing style and sharpen one's skills. He has. Those of us who have read his submissions here have been privileged to watch a budding craftsman in his journeyman years. I would like to think that he hasn't submitted anything since 2009 because he has found a traditional publisher who appreciates his unique blend of science, philosophy, and sex enough to pay him. I would like to think that very much. But I also can't help but wonder if the scathing and pointless criticisms of his work hasn't simply discouraged yet another promising writer...

Not by the story.... Although some places confused me, with science that I could not follow, the story was masterful. I simply can't understand why so many readers have made negative comments. Maybe they simply can't comprehend anything more intricate than a quick jerk off read. Yes the story was very long but so well told that on more than one night I passed out while reading because I wanted to know what came next but my body wouldn't cooperate. Maybe one day this brilliant writer will return and tell us a little more about this society. Maybe he will write another story for our reading pleasure. Maybe he has gone on to be published and is now being paid to create such intricately woven stories. If so I hope I'll get the chance to read some of the published work.

The writing on this story is painfully bad. The author is clearly in love with his own voice and has a deep and abiding hatred of the English language. I've seen more concise and well-written stories from high school writing classes. The plot, if it can be called that, is convoluted and I'll-conceived. I can't begin to fathom how someone could unironically enjoy this dreck.

I don't know why people are so negative. The author has done an extraordinary job of weaving an incredibly complicated story together. I can find some major flaws as well (too many characters, for one thing) but the story itself is creative, unique, and well displayed. I think that with an editor this could easily become a best-selling series. I don't know why it's being wasted on ungrateful readers on an erotica site.

Was interested all the way through. Thx for the tremendous amount of time this took to write.

When an author can go on for three pages of paragraphs like these on Page 86, you know he is in dire need of an editor: "Let me describe this building," said Aggie. "I'm in a hexagonal pyramid of 36 floors. Each floor has its number of rooms equal to the number of rooms in the floor above it plus an additional collar of hexagons surrounding it. The formula is that the number of rooms on floor n + 1 equals the number of rooms on floor n plus a new collar of six n, and the top floor, floor 1, has one room. Get it? Floor 2 has 1 plus a collar of 6 equals 7 rooms, floor 3 has 7 plus a collar of 6 x 2 = 19 rooms, floor 4 has 19 plus a collar of 6 x 3 = 37 rooms, and so on." "There's also an interesting cubic relationship to the total number of rooms," added Emily. "The first two floors have a total of 8 rooms, the first three floors a total of 27, the first four floors a total of 64, and 36 floors means the entire pyramid has a total of 36 x 36 x 36 rooms. Wow!" "I know what that number is," commented Madison from the underground entrance rooms. "It's six to the sixth, 46,656. That's the number of meters in the length of Wobanakik, as near as our lasers can measure it. The builders of this place sure did like to play with the number six."

The builders may have liked playing with sixes— that doesn’t mean we do.

The voices above were of three of the random UVM students, almost all young women, who responded to billboard announcements of an off-campus frat party. They weren’t all math majors, but all speak easily about the vernices of hexagrams,and yet more mysteriously they all think in metric, despite being Americans from Vermont. Everything is measured in kilometers and meters, and nothing in feet, yards or miles.

There’s a lot missing from the story. The builders of the created world, apparently a lifeboat designed to preserve humanity, make no attempt to to attain any sort of diversity in the human genome, or even a gender balance. Saving humanity by posting party announcements on a college billboard or two doesn’t even select for the best and brightest, but only for those students most likely to want to party.

Despite the novella being posted on this site, the author has a curiously clinical take on sexual activity, as though he isn’t comfortable with describing consensual heterosexual relations (note: it's all heterosexual— despite it being a random collection of 21st Century college students, there are no gay or even bisexual characters). Male anatomy in particular is clinically described, so that it’s all about penises and scrotums (especially the latter— he may have a scrotal fetish); never about cocks, pricks or balls.

He is far more enthusiastic in his descriptions of rape. One group of fraternity members goes rogue when given the opportunity, enslaving a group of women and sexually torturing them. The author’s imagination does run toward sexual sadism, it appears.

The basic story isn’t bad at all. I can put up with the clinical sex, and skip over the sexually sadistic passages, but when I find myself confronted with pages and pages of characters discussing prime number sequences in ralation to hexagons and heptagons, I just stop caring. And I did.

I am not sure why this is in the illustrated section. Too long and no sexy photos that I could see before I gave up. Isn't there a better section for a "novel?"

This is a really great story that would be better placed somewhere else. An editor would have helped with the verboseness of the writing and the few misused words.

Very well build word. On first, unscrupulous glance, there lots and lots of unused potential, but it is obviously intended that way, for the most part at least.

For a longest time reading this I wondered why the alien's carefully crafted cruel game (environment very much reminds grandiose Hunger Games arena) is so badly underpopulated and allowed to fail miserably the very first day. Then the abrupt ending come, leaving so much to do still, but the explanation made sense, at least within the internal logic of the story.

Perhaps that would turn in entirety different story, but a lot of things would make more sense with ten to thousand times larger base population. Including potential for very interesting sequel six years later when directors with elevated authority clash each other interests what is practically eliminated now.

Illustrations are helpful, it so easy to convey in simple diagram what could be extremely hard to describe in concise and comprehensive way, but the category they force is unfortunate for the reader ability to find the work.

Sex that is essential for the story is violent and non-erotical, but willingness to honestly discuss difficult subjects is remarkable, while most if not all sweet and tender vanilla sex scenes are rather decorative and superficial. Although that's somewhat expected for a work of this magnitude, it could be so much better if there was more reason to read through not only pillow talk but also the action. Moreover, perfect opportunities for bedroom politics to influence fate of the world there were a plenty.

The downside of a large posting of this nature is commenting on specific parts. Most of the comments here are on the overall piece, but I am going to focus on one specific facet.

I am rereading this and came to a specific area and had a thought. Mark, Toshi, and Jada are talking about objective and subjective time over the phone. Jada asked the question, "How long has it been since we first met?" and Mark replied, "Over a year." It was then I had this thought: How can one objectively keep track of total time while in subjective time? The only answer that made any sense was subjectively of course, because there is no fixed reference. Moving in and out of each others experiences would make it very difficult to tally up a specific amount of time. I mean it seems like just yesterday summer arrived, but it seems like the Trump "presidency" will never end. uggh!

Test test test.

This story STARTS WITH A VERY BIG MISTAKE!As EVERYBODY KNOWS,THE WINTER SOLSTICE DOES NOT OCCUR ON 21st OF DECEMBER,but ON 22nd OF DECEMBER!

Also,I HAVE TO DISAGREE with someone who talked in a comment about “objective and subjective time”!In reality,THE SO-CALLED SUBJECTIVE TIME DOES NOT EXIST!IT’S ONLY A PRODUCT OF SOME HUMAN MINDS!Therefore,when that guy replied to that woman “over a year”,HE SIMPLY TOLD HER THE INTERVAL THAT PASSED SINCE THEIR FIRST MEETING!So,THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO USE TO COMPLICATE THINGS with ALL KIND OF MUMBO JUMBO like “subjective and objective time”!

First, congratulations to the author of this for a large, complex, and worthwhile creation. I understand your decisions and really, if this had an editor to cut out some rather wordy sections (it's okay, basic too-close-to-it mistake), it'd be a work worth spending money on.

The math was fun, but hard enough to follow that I just mostly skimmed the hex pyramid elevator logic. I got enough of it to like the idea, but not enough to compute what they were doing.

Story arcs blended well, and I could tell jumping around to keep the threads going wasn't easy, i respect your ability to do that; I tend to write first person to avoid the difficulty.

The religious notes seem to directly echo those of Unitarian Universalist ideals, which is fine, it's a liberal theological tradition dating back hundreds of years so you're in good company. UU's don't evangelize much, in case you've not heard of them. Ba'h'ai traditions are similar, too, though I've not explored them overmuch.

The internal logic held together well, too, and the inventiveness, also!

The only GIANT problem is the evolutionary bottleneck. If you don't know, if any species ever declines below about 10,000 individuals (5,000 each gender), they're much more susceptible to bad genetic conditions (inbreeding situations highlight this). It shows up in being open to a single disease being able to wipe out a significant percentage of the population. Some Native American groups in South America had problems due to wars where most of the men were killed, those left had to repopulate, and the subgroup ended up with disorders (I just read a book about this).

Alternate endings to fix this could have been:

* discovery of a large underground chamber where a large number of individuals had been captured in time-Zero stasis containers, and unfrozen in groups of 16 people every week, or

* discovery of a large data-storage capability where genetic "samples" (genomic sequence info, not actual physical samples) of 256,000 randomly-chosen people (etc.) are stored, allowing good genetic diversity from old-Earth population base. Upon request, women can have the autodoc impregnate them with a randomly choosen sample from this repository (but only after the first natural birth, to ensure it doesn't go all BraveNewWorld on them or something).

Thank you again for a great read, I've very much enjoyed it. i'd love to venmo you (the author) some bucks as a thank you, if that's possible.

@Anon

If you can read the chart, you will see it only occurs on the 22nd of December in the Northern Hemisphere during a leap year.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winter_solstice

As for time, not true. Jada and Mark had only met a few weeks before at the party. Which is why she asked him the question. She knows when they first met. But to Mark, he had spent an entire year with Toshi in the mind link. But to demonstrate the problem, imagine if the weekends were subjective time, and the week days were objective time, Quick, How many months have you spent in subjective time since 2015?

hammingbyrd7, I hope you are still reading these comments. Yes, this definitely needs a bit of editing, but overall I believe you have done a great job plotting the story and making us care about the characters. Since this was your last story here, I hope you have moved on to mainstream writing. Good luck to you, and thanks for a story that kept me reading!

This story is fucking amazing. I hate the 12 years ago, a bunch of weebo's told the author he had too many details and the story was too long for their 1.5 minute of attention span.

This is a great epic. I hope the author is still writing. This would be like if HFHM released a 900 page novel on day 1.

Quite obviously written over an extended time period. It's a bit jarring when the cell phones initially are voice-only, no internet or text messaging in, but suddenly develop video calling and remotely installable Palmpilot/J2ME level applications. Similarly, no one thinks of drones for 75 chapters, even when they would be very useful, but suddenly they are invented (and better than any drones available in 2021). The writer seems to have a European (French?) perspective of America (beyond the anachronistic use of the metric system). Yes we have zillions of native TV channels, but local TV stations are usually not available outside their home region.

Hard to believe anyone ever read this

Excellent!!!

Long and rewarding read. Probably more SF or Novel than Illustrated. I could not put this o e down once started. The characters are solid, learn, adapt, and thrive! There is an interesting approach to honor here on top of some creative science fiction. Many Thanks!

Couldn't stop reading. Yeah, there are flaws and logical issues, but the story and characters are sufficiently interesting.

0: not the worst sci-fi novel I've read. interesting premise.

1: way too much overuse of the words "pet" and especially "Gosh!".

2: it's hard to write so many voices and keep them distinct. maybe should have reduced the number of major characters.

3: The ending is at the wrong point. It should be a birth, and the counter going up for the first time.

Apparently has no clue what illustrated means.AsrJOM

Love it, LOVE it, LOVE IT!!!!

Such a good story! Good character profiles.

PLEASE keep waiting because you are sooo good!