I've Always Been Incorrigible

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Even as a senior citizen, Oliver Tyler had a one track mind.
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It had been a long day at my granddaughter's graduation party, but while most of the other relatives and friends of my granddaughter's had faded in the heat and got groggy from the booze, yours truly was still doing fine.

You have to pace yourself. I had learned that long ago the hard way, because while it's amusing when you're young to be the clown doing keg stands, it's more enjoyable to be the audience instead of the performer.

Besides, at a party like my daughter and her husband threw for their kid, held out in their backyard around the pool, there was a lot to see. Nubile 18 year old girls running around in scanty suits kept one's attention, and to most of the guys in attendance the girl who was watched the most was my granddaughter Amanda.

Amanda, a perky blonde with a figure much like her Mom's had been at her age, was undeniably beautiful but while I confess to glancing at her from time to time from behind my shades, this story isn't about her.

I have no perverted thoughts regarding my granddaughter, because while I confess to being a deviate whose mind is usually in the gutter, I am a degenerate with morals, if such a thing is possible.

Therefore, while I freely admit to ogling every woman of legal age at the party, the two exceptions were my daughter and granddaughter. They were off limits to my leering, although that didn't apply to my son-in-law's huge-busted sister who I checked out whenever her husband wasn't around.

There was one young lady that I concentrated on all day, and since she arrived early that meant she was my eye candy for a long time. The girl is question was a cute young thing named Janice who happens to be my granddaughter's best friend and the more I looked at her the more I was attracted to her.

To be honest I suspect that poor Janice got less attention than any other girl, since I guessed that maybe part of her role in my granddaughter's life was to make Amanda look prettier in comparison. Knockout girls often did that when I was young - hanging out with less attractive girls - and maybe they still do.

Janice wasn't ugly mind you, but she was clearly not being swarmed over by the boys her age even though she seemed to try her best to make herself available. She had a nice smile and was friendly to all, even me, but as the day went on she seemed to get a little bit down and started to play the role of a waitress or hostess instead of an available young lady.

So maybe Janice was a little plump, maybe carrying 20 or 30 pounds too much on her 5'3" frame, but that sort of thing never bothered me, and maybe her nose was a little big and she had a bit of a pear shaped body with her bottom larger than her top. So what?

Back in the Gilligan's Island days when it came to choosing between Ginger and Mary Ann, there was no comparison in my book. I even married a Mary Ann of sorts because I always thought that many of the beauty queens came with attitude whereas the somewhat attractive ladies tried harder to please. Lord knows my very tolerant and loving late wife did for almost 40 years.

Janice, who I looked on as a Mary Ann sidekick to my granddaughter's Ginger, might have had an idea that I was interested in her but I suspect she just looked at me as a harmless old geezer who might be a little soft in the head. After all, I was almost 50 years her senior.

Any possible softness in my head had not traveled lower, thank goodness, and several times during the course of the day I was forced to get into the pool to mask the tent in my baggy shorts I used for swim trunks.

I didn't necessarily try to hide it from Janice because after all she was the one that caused it much of the time, and even though I kept it pointing down as best I could it was still obvious. That was because although I'm not matinee idol in the looks department, wasn't blessed with an abundance of brains or athletic ability, I am exceptionally well endowed.

I was the first man my late wife, who was a very naive farm girl straight off the turnip truck, had ever been with, so as she was fond of saying, she had no idea that all men weren't built like I was until later. It's not like having a huge cock is an accomplishment, since I had nothing to do with it, but while I never bragged neither did I try to hide it or not use it all I could.

So as the day began to turn into evening I had retreated to a lounge chair, watching as most of the crowd stayed around my granddaughter, and to my delight Janice wandered over towards me.

"Can I get you anything Mr. Tyler?" the cherubic cutie asked, nervously fiddling with the elastic around the leg opening of her extremely modest bathing suit, but I shook my head.

"I'm fine honey, but why don't you relax," I suggested. "Amanda should be doing the hostessing. After all it's her party."

"She's - busy," Janice said with a wave of her hand. "But maybe I will sit down if you don't mind."

"I would love that," I assured her. "Maybe people will talk though, thinking that we're together romantically."

"People don't usually talk about me like that," Janice said glumly.

"Between boyfriends?"

"You could say that."

"Keep your chin up dear. Cute girls like you are always in demand," I told her and got a roll of the eyes in return.

"Maybe when the party breaks up somebody will get desperate enough to hit on me. Isn't that a song? Something about girls looking better when the bar closes?"

"Perhaps. I wouldn't know about that because you were cute when I met you this morning," I replied before continuing. "Is that how it works? You think boys settle for you when there's no other options?"

"I don't think it. I know it. There's a couple boys here that can tell you about it," the cherubic gal explained. "Lucky for me there aren't any cameras at the old stump."

"The old stump?"

"It's what's left of what must have been a big tree back in the woods. We go back there and drink sometimes, and it's a good place to go if you want to - can't believe I'm telling you this."

"My lips are sealed," I said. "Did you drink any of that Southern Comfort they were trying to keep hidden?"

"You saw that huh Mr. Tyler?" Janice giggled. "I had a little. It must have loosened my tongue."

"So the gang goes back there to get stoned and copulate?"

"Copulate?" Janice chuckled. "No, at least I don't. I'm desperate but not THAT desperate. I do - other stuff though. Guess I'm kinda famous for it. Notorious might be a better word. That's why some boys call me BJ."

"That's your mistake right there Janice," I opined. "Wasting your time with boys. You're too much woman for a kid. You should set your sights higher."

"Oh yeah? Somebody like you?" Janice asked with a laugh. "You want to go back to the stump with me?"

"That's an idea although I could do better than that."

"You must be drunk too," Janice told me as she leaned back and linked her hands behind her neck. "It's been a long day."

"That it has," I agreed as I looked at her breasts pushing out against her top, and I noted the dense five o'clock shadow that filled the hollows of her armpits. "When I got here earlier your underarms were as smooth as butter."

"Omigod," Janice mumbled as she quickly lowered her arms and blushed.

"I shouldn't have said that because I was enjoying the view," I responded. "Couldn't help wondering what it would feel like to run my tongue under your arms."

"Omigod," Janice repeated while appearing to shiver at the thought.

"Nobody ever did that to you?" I wondered aloud, and after Janice shook her head no briskly I elaborated. "Another reason to avoid boys. They have no real appreciation of a woman's body. There is no part of a woman that I wouldn't or haven't kissed. Your underarms are a very sensitive and sensual area."

"I think that would tickle," Janice replied.

"Not if it's done right," was my response as I leaned towards the girl. "If you'd like I could show you."

"Not here," Janice said with a laugh.

"Of course not dear, but I can dream."

"You want me to suck your dick, don't you?" Janice whispered.

"I wouldn't turn down the offer," I said. "However I would insist on returning the affection."

"I'm a virgin," Janice blurted out. "I know that seems hard to believe because of the way I've been talking but it's true."

"Good for you dear, but you do know there are other ways to make love, don't you?"

"Yeah."

"Ever do that Janice?" I whispered. "Ever have anal sex?"

"Once."

"Did you like it?"

"I guess, but..."

"Why? Because I'm Amanda's grandfather?" I asked.

"Sort of but - you know - I mean - I saw you in the pool before," Janice stuttered.

"I saw you as well."

"That's not what I mean. When your trunks got wet I could - you know - see you?"

"Is that so? I didn't realize that," I lied. "What exactly could you see though?"

"I saw enough to tell that you're - you know?"

"Old?"

"No, you know what I mean," Janice said in a coy manner that made her dimples appear.

"Afraid I don't but you've piqued my curiosity, I told the teen while enjoying her blush.

"When your trunks were wet you could see the outline of your dick clear as day," Janice said in a barely audible voice. "Mari Pressman saw it too because she told Amanda that her grandfather was hung like a horse."

"Sorry, but I don't care about Mari Pressman or anybody else but you," I explained. "I didn't mean for it to be obvious but I am flattered you looked."

"Tough not to see it," Janice grinned. "It looked as big as a salami."

"I assure you it's not," I responded. "I'm actually quite average as far as thickness goes, but is being well endowed a bad thing?"

"NO! I mean I don't know, but to do what you were talking about?" Janice responded with another shudder of her body. "It would kill me. Dylan Ward's hurt and his dick wasn't very big.

"Nonsense. Once again you're talking about the difference between a boy and a man. A man takes his time, using his fingers and his tongue to prepare the girl properly, and while it might be a tad uncomfortable at first by the time it's over you'll be wanting it again."

"Tongue?"

"I told you there's not a part of a woman's body I haven't worshiped," I said as I put my hand on Janice's wrist. "I would especially enjoy rimming a sweet thing like you."

"Rimming? Is that... omigod! Really?"

"Absolutely. Why do you think I was aroused most of the day? It was from looking at you. Your sweet round breasts, your luscious full butt, your shapely legs - and I'm also guessing that you have a nice thick bush between those legs too," I explained. "When you fiddled with the leg opening of your suit I could see the rich brown curls you kept trying to tuck back in."

"Don't be embarrassed," I quickly added when I sensed Janice's feelings. "I was so glad to see you weren't one of those girls that wax and shave everything. I loathe that. I love women, not little girls."

"A penny for your thoughts," I said after a moment of awkward silence. "Are you considering my offer?"

"You know, if things were different..."

"You mean if I wasn't so old, or if I wasn't Amanda's grandfather?"

"No, it's not that Mr. Tyler. I mean, you're a nice man and you're in really good shape for a man your age. How old are you though?"

"Take a guess."

"60?"

"Thank you. I'll be 66 next month."

"Wow."

"Wow good or bad?"

"Good. I mean, you're older than my grandfather and it takes him forever to get out of a chair," Janice giggled.

"Too bad. Rest assured though that although there's plenty of snow on the roof," I told the girl as I rubbed my hand through my thinning silver locks. "There is still a lot of fire in the furnace. Not just talk either, although I do a lot of that as well. What do you say?"

"People will see us going back to the woods," Janice cautioned.

"I don't want to take you into the woods, although that sounds like fun. Where I want to take you is to my motel room."

"A motel?"

"Is that bad? Never been to one?"

"On vacation with my parents when I was young," Janice shrugged. "Told you I'm not the pig you might have thought I was."

"I never thought you were a pig at all. I think you're a beautiful woman who was being ignored by guys who aren't worthy of you, and I admit to trying to take advantage of their ignorance by sweeping you off your feet."

"Never did nothing with a man your age," Janice told me.

"And I haven't been with an 18 year old girl in - decades," I countered. "Here's what I'm going to do. In a few minutes I'm going to say my goodbyes and drive down the street and park. If you want to, you can leave the party after I'm gone and walk down to meet me. I'll wait a half hour, and if you decide not to, I'll understand. No hard feelings."

"What if when we get to your motel room I chicken out?"

"I'll take you home."

"And what if we do it and it hurts too much?"

"It won't, but no worries because I would stop anytime you asked," I assured the teen.

"Okay," Janice said cautiously as she prepared to stand up. "Guess I'll go back to the kids."

"Good idea."

"One thing though," Janice said as she turned her back to the group around the keg. "How big is it? This big?"

The chubby girl held her hands about 6" apart, and when I shook my head she spread them apart slowly.

"You're really hung up on the size thing around you?" I wondered aloud.

"Hung up? Scared is more like it," Janice admitted.

"Nothing to be afraid of child. You'll see," I said as I rose to say goodbye to my daughter and granddaughter. "I'll be at the end of the street."

As I said my farewells I looked at the plump backside of the girl I was hoping to explore. Her rounded shoulders were a little pink from the sun as were her stocky but shapely legs, and I had to force myself not to look while my daughter droned on about being happy to see me again.

***

Regrets? I've had a few, but as I watched the chubby teen walking towards my car I knew that this wasn't one of them. True enough that she was only 18 and I was almost 50 years older than Janice, but 18 these days is not like it was in my day. They grow up faster now.

"Can't believe I'm doing this," Janice said as she climbed in the front seat, the pink windbreaker she had put on making a swishing sound as she buckled up.

"I'm glad you did," I said as I reached over and put my hand on her bare thigh, gently squeezing the soft skin as I pulled away. "It's only 5 minutes from here."

"Do I have to walk through a lobby or something?"

"Nope," I told her. "The room has an outside entrance, plus it's at the end of the building so no one will see you go in with me."

"Good. Sorry."

"Don't be. I understand," I replied, knowing how she would feel if a schoolmate saw her going into a motel room with an old man like me. "That will make it tougher for people to hear you scream too."

"Just kidding," I quickly added when I saw her face in the dashboard lights. "They'll be screams of pleasure if there are any. Have any trouble getting away?"

"Not really, although I think Amanda thought I was going to stick around to help clean up," Janice told me. "I told her I was tired and she told me that she was sorry that her Grandpa put me to sleep."

"That right?"

"Yeah. I told her you were a neat guy," Janice confided. "I also told her that you made me wet talking dirty to me."

"You did?" I replied with a raised eyebrow before the girl giggled and admitted she was kidding.

"I wanted to tell her that but I didn't," Janice continued. "You did though."

"Did what dear?"

"Made me wet," was her reply. "Nobody ever treated me like that. Like they wanted me and I wasn't just there in case they got desperate. Made me feel good."

"I was telling you nothing but the truth," I told her. "I do find you very attractive and to me you were the best looking woman there."

"Thank you."

"Correction. I did tell one lie," I confessed. "About not knowing that when my trunks got wet they were a bit revealing. I knew that of course, but that was partly your fault."

Along with the teen's giggle came the arrival of her hand on my thigh, but I suggested that wasn't a good idea with me driving.

"Besides, we're there now," I told her as I pulled in to the only decent motel in town. "I am glad you're loosening up through."

"See what I turn into when we go inside," Janice cautioned as I drove down to the last space and killed the engine. "A quivering bowl of jelly is my guess."

"You're in good hands," I said as we exited the car and went up to room 124.

Janice looked just like a petrified teenager as I closed the door behind her and flicked the dead bolt, her eyes bulging wide at the huge bed in front of her.

"Okay?" I asked as I came around to face her, brushing a stray brown hair from her cheek and kissed her forehead.

"My heart is beating like a jack hammer," she told me, and so I slipped my hand into her open windbreaker and put my hand above her breast.

"I can feel it. That's a good thing for it to be beating," I said as I leaned down a bit to make my 5" height difference disappear, and when I pressed my lips against hers the kiss began awkwardly but ended with Janice very involved.

"Excuse me for one minute," I said as I went into the bathroom to relive myself, and while in there dabbed a little deodorant on after washing my hands.

"Didn't think of that," I said when I saw the little toiletries on the sink, because I wasn't expecting any of this when I went to Amanda's graduation party and hadn't packed any lubricant, but the little thing of body lotion would have to do because I wasn't going out shopping now.

For the heck of it I decided to take off the shorts I wore all day and put on a pair of black satin boxer shorts. The contrast between my silver chest hair looked nice to me, and I played with the boxer shorts to figure out the best level.

"How's this honey?" I snickered at the mirror after hiking them up fairly high, enough for the tip of my foreskin to peek out from the end of the briefs, before putting them at a proper level.

While my cock was not peeking out the outline was visible, and while I knew it had got the girl's attention before this was different, so when I emerged to rejoin her I hoped for the best.

"Fancy underwear. Don't have anything that nice," Janice said as her eyes went to the bulge. "Gotta go too."

"I'll be waiting," I replied as the girl went to the bathroom, and when she finally emerged I was waiting.

"I was wondering whether you decided to climb out the window to escape," I suggested as she entered the room itself where I sat waiting on the edge of the bed.

"Thought about it," she giggled nervously, and as she looked around she noted that I had dimmed the lights a little.

"Mood lighting," I told Janice. "Although I've been in the mood all day after seeing you in your bathing suit - and you probably still have that cold and clammy thing on under that windbreaker.

"Yeah."

"You might as well take it off," I offered, and laughed when after Janice took off the windbreaker she just stood there. "I meant the bathing suit. It's a nice suit and all but I'd like to see what's underneath."

"Wish I could wear stuff like Amanda," she mumbled while delaying and patting her tummy." I'd love to wear a two piece sometime."

"You're too much woman for that," I reminded her, nodding as she reached up and started to ease the strap off her round shoulder, and after Jackie had both straps down she pulled the front of the suit down, exposing a sweet pair of round globes that were a little smaller than I had imagined, although the fat crimson nipples were delicious looking.

"Nice," I sighed while continuing to nod as the teen self-consciously lowered the suit down past her little belly, and I exhaled when the timberline of her bush appeared soon after, a lush thick forest that completely hid her sex.

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