Jessa Ch. 10

Jessa felt her hands shake and she lifted the pendant dangling between her breasts and looked at it again. There was a tiny inscription on the back; she had to step over by the window to get enough light to read it. It said "To My Love." She stared out the window at the autumn sunlight bathing Paris in an early morning golden glow. Her fist curled around the pendant. Would a man, forced to take a lover solely to breed more children give that woman a pendant that said "To My Love?" And if Torah's father had loved her, why proclaim it in such tiny, secretive script? But what if the lover had a secret lover of her own? Torah had said she became his lover after she was sent to Renik. But if there had been true love between her and Torah's father, why did she run to Torah in her misery with Renik? And why would Torah betray his father's honor to bed his love? What if her affair with Torah had started long before Renik? What if they had been lovers when she was with his father? What if Samu and Saula were Torah's children, not brothers? Twins, even as she had been carrying. Coincidence? Jessa shook her head. She knew better. Propensity for multiple births was carried in the female line. She forced her fingers to uncurl and stared at the pendant as if it could give her answers. It seemed as if it was screaming betrayal at her. Maybe all of the anger Torah directed at her was because she wasn't Lania, and this was his way of reminding himself, every time he saw her wearing it.

In a sudden fit of her own anger, Jessa ripped the necklace from her neck, breaking the delicate chain. Immediately, she felt dismay, wondering if Torah was in the outer room, waiting for her to emerge; with the pendant about her neck. She put it back in the box and tucked his note into the pocket of her robe. She had memorized all of the instructions all ready, being gifted with excellent recall. But she didn't know when she would have access to a computer again and this was one gift she meant to hang on to.

She padded barefoot out of the bedroom and was surprised to find Jacq, seemingly waiting for her. He was busy tapping away on his phone, but looked up with a smile and put it away when he saw her. "Torah asked me to let you know that he had to leave during the night. Drau was extremely persistent, I'm afraid." He said Drau's name with the same distaste that Torah and Erich seemed to have for the man. Jacq cocked an eyebrow at her. "Did you find the gift Torah left?"

Jessa nodded. "I did. There was a lovely pendant, but I'm afraid in my clumsiness I broke the chain. I guess I'm not used to such delicate jewelry. I shall have to get it fixed."

"I'm sure Mia can recommend a jeweler to you. In the meantime, an apartment has been arranged and your servants arrived late last night. They will pack your things here later today. If you want to get dressed, I would be happy to take you by the apartment before I head in to work."

"That would be wonderful," Jessa agreed and hurried to dress.

Jacq drove her to an apartment building across the river. It looked ancient, but well-kept and there were even flowers planted in some of the window boxes which gave it a quaint look. Her apartment was on the top, third floor and when they reached it, the door was open. Jessa could hear two women chatting, though it took a while to find them. The apartment was large, much bigger than Torah's "bachelor pad" in Dusseldorf. The bedroom was similar to the one at the villa though not as large, with two walk in closets. There was also a guest bedroom. The large main room included space for dining and an open kitchen. Jessa suspected the old apartment building must have undergone significant remodeling, since most buildings of this vintage in old France tended to have many small rooms. Off of the large main room, there were two private offices. There were minimal furnishings, but enough to get by with easily.

The two women turned out to be Shay, an older highborn, and Raza, a young Elite close to Jessa's age. Her curiosity was peaked, as Raza was certainly of childbearing age and comely enough. Jessa couldn't help but wonder if she had fertility issues, but she wouldn't ask such a difficult question. Even her nearly boundless curiosity knew some boundaries. She found both women likable. They certainly were not put there as a security force, either to protect Jessa or to hold her captive in Paris, though to report to Torah on her behavior, she had no doubt.

As Jacq was preparing to leave, Jessa put a hand on his arm. "Am I safe here? I mean, from Torah's enemies?"

He smiled encouragement at her. "Our Council factions are not so contentious as in Dusseldorf and other areas. And all field teams have been alerted to watch for elements from... less friendly factions.

"Then I can come and go as I please? Without worry, I mean."

"Within the occupied sector, yes. Just keep your cell phone with you and turned on. Then we can find you easily if need be."

"Thank you for everything."

"It has been my pleasure," he said warmly. "You have my number and Mia's in your phone. Call us if you need anything."

Even as he said that, his own phone rang and he put it to his ear. "Yes. I'm still here." He glanced at Jessa as he listened. "I'll let her know. Trés bien."

"They want you to come back to the hospital this afternoon. Around two. One of your servants can drive you."

"Did they find something wrong?" Jessa asked, her hand instinctively going to her belly.

"No, no. The doctor just wants to check something. He will explain better than I can. Don't forget now," he said, with a kiss to her cheek.

Jessa learned that the servants had a small apartment across the hall from hers. She chatted briefly with them even as she surreptitiously looked for her laptop among the items they were unpacking. When she found it, she scurried off to one of the small office spaces where she found a serviceable desk and, in one of its drawers, instructions for how to get on the building's wireless. A short time later, Shay knocked on the door to tell her that they were going to go by the hotel to get the rest of the items left there, then shopping for groceries and would be back in time for one of them to take her to her appointment. When Jessa suggested that she could drive herself, both women looked horrified. Apparently, that was not something that proper ladies did. She had a feeling they were going to be even more shocked when she went back to running every morning, in sweats, no less. Jessa smiled at the thought, and wondered briefly if she might be able to swim in the river, though it would soon be getting too cold for such things.

She returned to her computer. It turned out that the Councilary Web was beyond frustrating. Every attempt to create search spiders or web crawlers or other bots were blocked leaving one to follow a trail of bread crumbs from one site to another, and somehow keep track of the thousands of URLs one did manage to discover. No matter, she may be naïve to the ways of Tenth Circle Ladies, but this she knew. And soon, she would no longer feel like a total idiot when it came to the Council and the Circles. She was still turning up random sites, watching for patterns to the URLs or naming conventions when the servants returned and knocked on her office door, offering her some lunch. Jessa reluctantly left her computer behind and followed her stomach to the outer room.

She had barely finished the delicious, filling lunch before it was time to head for the hospital. Shay stayed at the apartment to begin on dinner while Raza drove her to the doctor appointment. Raza chatted endlessly about how much she liked Paris and its quaint atmosphere, as opposed to the more sterile feel of Dusseldorf where she had been providing services. Again, as with Charl and Menah, Jessa felt that arm's length diffidence between Elite and Tenth Circle, even though she'd only been Tenth Circle for a matter of days. She found herself hoping she could break down that barrier with Raza, who was so close to her age and upbringing. She gently steered Raza to speaking about where she had grown up in Rhine Region and threw in comparisons to her own childhood in Parvil. By the time they reached the hospital, she felt she'd actually made some progress, though the moment they left the car, Raza returned to full-on servant mode, even walking exactly two steps behind Jessa on the way in. Jessa rolled her eyes in exasperation, but she didn't want to get the girl in trouble, either. So, she didn't say anything.

The same doctor met her in the same maternity ward. Apparently, it was his base of operations, even though he was more gynecologist than obstetrician, from Jessa's understanding. She balked when he was pushing her to change into an exam gown. "I don't understand why we need to do this again," she complained as he rolled the ultrasound equipment over by the exam table.

"Didn't they tell you?" he asked impatiently.

"Tell me what?"

"The Council has dictated that your egg be harvested, or eggs if we should be so lucky again. It will be fertilized and implanted in a woman whose ovaries are not producing. Please get changed."

"My egg?" Jessa exclaimed.

"Of course your egg. We need to determine how close you are to ovulation. The gown," he said, waving imperiously as he left the room.

Jessa stared after him, unsure what she was feeling. Some other woman would be carrying her baby. That didn't seem right, somehow. But the doctor had explained the damage that could be done to the muscle wall if a fertilized egg were to implant in the bruised area. Although the risk was minimal, any risk at all was too much as far as the Council was concerned. Even more so now that she had shown a propensity for twins. And a healthy egg was too valuable to waste, apparently. She changed with great reluctance, trying to remember what was involved in harvesting eggs. Visions of very long needles were dancing in her head as she climbed onto the exam table.

A short while later, after the ultrasound and a blood draw had been completed, the doctor assured her that they should be able to harvest in less than a week, and that she would have to come back daily until then. Jessa didn't even try to hide the fact that she was rolling her eyes at the thought. As she dressed, she wondered if Torah knew what was going on and how he would feel about it. Not that he could override the Council's decision, anyway. Or would even want to, she suspected.

When she went back through the ward, Raza jumped up from the waiting area and fell into step behind her. All Jessa could think about was getting back home to her computer, though. Her initial searching had been so tantalizing, it had been almost impossible to concentrate on finding her way around first. She had bribed herself with the promise of delving deeper into the sites she had already found that evening. In fact, when they got back to the apartment, Jessa went immediately to change into comfortable clothes and headed for the office. It took both Raza and Shay to convince her to come back out a few hours later for some dinner.

It was obvious that Shay was an excellent cook, though her skills were more toward Germanic dishes, but Jessa suspected she would soon discover the subtle wonders of French cuisine. It was also obvious that it was going to take a good deal of work to break down their ingrained caste barriers if Jessa wanted any company for dinner. As soon as they had her situated at the table, they had both disappeared to their own apartment with barely warm food and the promise to return to clean up later. She knew that's what Torah would approve of, but it was damn lonely for her. Still, if he came back unexpectedly and found her being too familiar with the servants, there would be hell to pay for her and for them. Tonight, though, Jessa was only too happy to gobble her food and get back to her computer as soon as possible.

When Jessa emerged in the wee hours of the morning, it was only because her bladder and thirst were insistent and undeniable. When she finished in the bathroom, she returned to the kitchen and found the wine bottle from her evening meal. She filled a glass and went to stand by a window looking out over the subdued, but sparkling lights of the occupied sector. Her mind was spinning with a history of the Council and Circles that had never been taught in any of her history courses. And that was just the new history of Europe. Undoubtedly what she had learned of the other continents was every bit as fallacious. She sank to the floor, her chin resting on her arm as it lay on the windowsill. It was small wonder the Circles had so little to do with even other highborn. The weight of the lies must be nearly unbearable. And what meaning did it have to be Highborn or Elite if they received the same lies that the lowborn were told. Obviously, it meant nothing more than the privilege of holding a 'job' that was less menial than those reserved for the lowborn. Oh, yes. And the fairytale hope of marrying someone of Circle status.

She thought of her father who oversaw windfarms throughout the Parvil and Switzerland Regions. He sat at a computer all day and ordered lowborn to make repairs and perform maintenance. Because he was Elite. As was she. And why? Because an ancestor had been an Olympian? Because someone in their past had a slightly higher IQ than someone else? She had just discovered that being Elite was a meaningless distinction save for the happenstance of perceived genetic advantages. Worse, she had discovered that an entire continent's social stratification strategy hinged on who received which production run of vaccine. And that was determined first by who had the money and assets to fund the research – Circles One through Four – then on who did the research and production – Circles Five through Twelve – and then on those the Council – consisting primarily of members of the first four Circles – determined were genetically advantaged enough to receive the precious limited quantities of vaccine after the demands of the Circles had been met. And just in case nurture really was as important as nature, rules were handed down that highborn women with children must be mothers first, working only before or after their childbearing years, if at all.

So probably, a great-grandfather, or -mother, of Torah had been a microbiologist, or epidemiologist or some such scientist important to the finding of a vaccine. And because of that distant relative, he was a lord, wealthy beyond her imagination; served, in fact, by people like her and the lowborn, many of whom survived by virtue of natural immunity rather than a vaccine they were the very last to receive. And his contribution to the world now was to kill on command. Her contribution, while it could be to find a cure for the tertiary pandemic, would instead be to breed, perhaps even more killers like Torah.

Jessa leaned her forehead against her arm, weary to her soul. She knew the truths she found would not be pleasant, but somehow she'd always thought they would at least make a certain sense. She'd been taught that the Circles and indeed the Council itself had been selected from great leaders. She wasn't foolish enough to believe that the best leaders just emerged to everyone's acclaim and at everyone's accord, still she had assumed that there had been some process to select for wisdom and leadership. Something more than just money.

She hadn't even begun to delve into the current makeup of the Council or expertise of the Circles and certainly not the factions that Jacq had hinted at. What else would she find? She pulled her cell phone out and looked at the time. A little after four. She stood with determination and went to the bedroom to dress for running. She needed to clear her head of the ugliness from the night, and the fresh autumn air of Paris seemed just the thing. Part of her hoped that when the sun rose, the light of dawn would make everything seem less dark and foreboding. After just a bit of searching, she found her clothes and a light jacket. It took more searching, though, to find the key card for the apartment door. The women hadn't felt comfortable leaving it in plain sight and hadn't wanted to disturb her, assuming no doubt that she would have no need of it so soon. As an afterthought, Jessa left a short note explaining she had gone running, then slipped out of the building, thrilled to finally be running again and for fun rather than for her life.

She had only gotten a bit of the occupied sector mapped out in her head during her brief trips through the city, but Torah and others had pointed out the yellow ribbons that marked the boundaries and she made sure to stay within those areas. Where Dusseldorf had been a small area of tall buildings, Paris' occupied sector was somewhat more sprawling, encompassing older and definitely more picturesque parts of the city, giving her lots to explore and remember to return to in the daylight. She saw few cars and even fewer people. Once, when she saw a black, gas-powered SUV that reminded her of the vehicles that Renik had used, she changed course to avoid it, opting for a footpath that eventually lead through a park along the Seine.

Eventually, the sun drifted up, shining through a narrow patch between the horizon of the cityscape and the low hanging clouds. It was every bit as cleansing as she had hoped, but it was still with some reluctance that she turned back toward her apartment. She was less than half way there when the sun was again hidden, this time by the grey clouds. The brief brightness of the morning, as well as her thoughts, turned to murkiness again. She slowed to a walk, hands shoved in her jacket. When a car pulled up beside her a moment later, and the passenger door opened, she came to a full stop, eyes searching for an escape route. She even backed up a step or two as the driver door opened, but then she recognized Jacq emerging with an angry frown.

"Get in the car, Jessa."

She stepped slowly toward the passenger door. "Is something wrong?"

"Torah called me. Apparently, your servants called him, frantic because you were missing."

Jessa looked at him over the top of the car. "I just went for a run. I left them a note. And I was careful to stay within the occupied sector."

"Get in the car, s'il vous plait," he repeated. With great reluctance, she slid into the seat and closed the door. She stared out the windshield even when she could feel his steady gaze on her. "People don't go for a run at four o'clock in the morning."

"How do you know what time it... Oh, security cameras," she said, answering her own question. "I left a note," she repeated.

"You also left your cell phone."

"I was told not to keep it in a pocket because of radiation," she argued. "I don't run with a bag."

"Then you don't run," he said with finality, pushing the starter.

"You can't..." she exclaimed, but the glare he gave her stopped any other words in her throat.

"How many options do you think you have, Jessa?"

She sank back in the seat, closing her eyes to keep the tears at bay. When he pulled up in front of her building, she was out of the car in a flash and up the front steps. He didn't follow, though he watched until she was inside, and she noted with disgust that Raza was on her phone when Jessa reached the apartment, apparently confirming her arrival. Both Raza and Shay had the decency to look somewhat guilty as Jessa headed for the shower. She knew the servants were only doing their assigned duties, but her anger would take time to quell and a hot shower seemed the best place for that at the moment.

By the time she had emerged from the shower, she had a renewed determination to find out everything available about this grim world she found herself in and to find it out as quickly as possible. She donned a gown, knowing she wouldn't be allowed to refuse the appointment with the doctor in the afternoon, and she may have slammed a few doors getting dressed, because when she emerged from the bedroom, Shay was just putting her breakfast on the table, and studiously avoiding her eyes.