Just Say No

"Can you tell me what happened with Jared?" I asked. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want, but I'm just trying to understand."

She shrugged. "You know what I like. Jared was cool at first, but he just wasn't into it. He tried, but it was always so obviously half-hearted. Like, if I even flinched he'd stop what he was doing, and act all concerned. Eventually, I called him on his bullshit, and evidently that was too much for him. He dumped me because he didn't want that, he wanted normal."

"Maybe you're wondering why I stuck with him, if he wasn't what I wanted," Cassie suggested. "I'll tell you why. It's because he respected me, and he was even willing to try. Oh, sure there were the shit-heads too. Dale was only too happy to whip me silly, but as soon as he figured out that outside the bedroom I'm smart, capable, and earned three times as much as he did, it was sayonara, sister!"

She stabbed a finger at my chest. "You, though. It was like you could read my mind. I didn't even have to spell it out, you went there all on your own. You were perfect, but then— then you left it at that. Like, every time, we would do a scene and it would be great, but that was it. Then I saw you tonight, and I get it now. I'm such an idiot. I'm just a side thing for you. You think you can just play with me, walk on the wild side while you go out searching for the right normie? You still want little-miss-perfect-white-picket-fence-and-two-kids-in-the-burbs normal? Well, fuck you!"

My mouth was hanging open.

All this time, she had wanted me to do more, was expecting me to do more. Why hadn't I done more? Because it kept coming back to her demanding permission to smoke, that's why. That was part of our dominance game. How was I supposed to know she wanted to be romantic, when she kept bringing that up?

"You've got it backwards," I told her. "Every time, before you left you asked for permission. It was like you wanted to make sure everything kept going just like it was. I didn't think you wanted more."

"Of course I want more, that's why I was asking! But you couldn't have the common decency to say yes, huh? You kept it going, kept me going, and going and going. Just once, couldn't you say yes?"

She was equating my ability to genuinely care for her with my willingness to let her light up a cigarette. Did she really think that I wasn't interested, just because I wouldn't approve of her addiction? It was so frustrating, so completely and utterly wrong. How could she think that?

"No, I couldn't." I saw Cassie's face fall and her hands clench as I said the words, so I finished quickly. "But the reason I can't is because I want to be with you. I'll tell you no, but that doesn't mean that I want someone else. There is no one else. I want you. Only you. Okay?"

Cassie loudly sucked in a deep breath, then let it out. "Really? Like this? This is really how you want me?"

Looking at her then, I saw something in her eyes that wasn't anger or frustration. It looked a lot like hope, mixed with nervousness and more than a little bit of lust.

In answer to her question, I did something I hadn't done before. I'd spanked her ass, tormented her nipples and forced my cock down her throat, but that moment was the first time I kissed her on the lips.

Cassie responded immediately, returning the kiss with forceful passion, wrapping her arms around me as she did so.

When we finally came up for air, she still held me tightly. "To answer your question," I said, "this is exactly how I want you. I want you just the way you are." I winked at her. "I can even get over your irrational love of technology. It's part of you, and I absolutely want you. I know—"

I didn't get a chance to finish the sentence, because she kissed me again, just as fiercely as I'd kissed her a moment before.

I don't think I'd realized until that moment in the coffee shop, when I thought I might have lost her, just how much Cassie had come to mean to me. Not only was she willing to explore some of my more extreme sexual proclivities, I enjoyed talking with her as I'd done every night for the past week. I'd been enjoying our dinners together as much as what we did afterwards.

Somewhere in the midst of everything I'd lost sight of what I wanted not just in a sexual partner, but in a relationship. I'd somehow missed that we were much better matched than any of the other girls I'd dated, that she was exactly what I'd been looking for, and I almost let her get away.

Cassie withdrew from the kiss first this time. Wordlessly, she took my hand and led me into her bedroom.

Two bookshelves lined the walls along with a dresser. A rich, crimson bedspread and matching sheets covered Cassie's large, four-poster bed. Beside the bed, there was a nightstand with an alarm clock on top. Finally, at the foot of the bed there stood an ornately carved wooden chest, stained the same dark shade as the wooden bed frame.

In stark contrast to all the monitors and computer equipment along the wall of Cassie's living room, the digital display of the alarm clock was the only screen I could see in her bedroom. I liked that.

I expected Cassie to get on the bed, but instead she walked over to the chest, opened it, and then stood aside to give me a better view.

Inside the chest were row upon row of neatly arranged sex toys. I counted six vibrators, a set of glass butt-plugs that ranged from medium-sized to comically enormous, gags, nipple clamps, paddles, whips, several pairs of leather restraints, metal handcuffs and coils of rope. Everything was meticulously well-organized.

I glanced at the contents of the chest, then back at Cassie. I stepped towards her, putting my hands on her shoulders.

"Not tonight," I said. "It occurs to me that you've had your mouth on me every night this week and I haven't once returned the favor. That hardly seems fair. Why don't you slip out of those clothes, and let me take it from there?"

Cassie's eyes lit up. "Yes sir." She was so eager, that she practically ripped her sweater off. This was followed by her jeans, her underwear and finally her socks before she climbed into bed. She spread her legs wide in an obvious invitation.

I was still wearing the suit I had worn to work. It was somewhat disheveled from my frantic chase earlier, but I opted to leave it on for the moment. I didn't need to take it off for what I intended to do next.

I sat down on the edge of the bed. "Soon. Sit up for a moment, first."

When she did, I told her to face away from me. Then I placed my hands on her back, and began to give her a massage.

"You're tense," I said, as I began working the kinks out of her back. "You need to relax."

I moved down her back, slowly rubbing the tension out of her muscles. "I've enjoyed our time together this week, but I want tonight to be different. This time, we're going to focus on pleasure, not pain."

Cassie let out a low, appreciative moan.

After spending a few minutes on her back I moved my hands to her sides, lightly running them up and down her body. I kissed the back of her neck as my touch ventured further around towards her front, and I began to gently trace the shape of her magnificent breasts.

As much as I enjoyed touching her chest, I didn't linger too long. Instead, I let my fingers continue their journey down over her stomach, towards her legs. I moved down slowly, taking the time to circle her belly button a few times before descending further.

As I reached the top of her landing strip she let out a little gasp in anticipation of where I would go next. Except, instead of going straight for her center I veered off to the side, moving my hands over her hips and legs. Then, as I moved back up her body I brushed her sensitive inner thighs but again avoided going where she was expecting.

Cassie squirmed each time I narrowly avoided the spot where she most wanted the stimulation "Oh god, you're such a tease!"

I smiled as I turned my attention back to her breasts. My fingers moved in a circular motion, spiraling gently in and around her nipples. "Shhh. Just enjoy."

Then, I leaned over and kissed her left breast. As I positioned myself to get a better angle I put one hand on her shoulder and guided her back down into a reclining position.

I continued to plant small kisses on her breasts, but then began to work my way downward. I trailed kisses over the underside of her breasts, the top of her belly, all around her belly button, and then further down.

This time I kept going straight down. When the tip of my tongue touched her clit, Cassie cried out significantly louder than before.

As I suspected, she was wet and ready. I could smell her musky scent and it only encouraged me. I dove in, aggressively running my tongue between her legs.

"Oh my fucking...!" Cassie shrieked, then trailed off. "Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck."

I was enjoying the effect I was having on her. Then she ruined it.

"Oh fuck. Fuck, shit, fuck, fuck, fuck. Please? Please, may I?"

She'd slipped it in so naturally. Given the context, I initially thought she was asking for me to keep going, to make her come. I almost responded by saying 'of course', only narrowly stopping myself. The exact words and the ambiguous nature of the question only registered at the last instant.

I stopped, and then put a finger to her lips, shushing her. "None of that. Not tonight."

It was possible Cassie meant the question as I had initially interpreted it, but then again, she was smart. I couldn't let it slide, but I wanted that evening to be special.

"Be quiet, and wait here a moment." I stood up, walked to the chest at the foot of the bed and retrieved a ball gag.

"Every time you find a way of asking for permission I'm going to have to tell you no," I explained. "Then, when I try to get that across to you, we end up right back where we started. I don't want tonight to end that way."

"You're clever," I told her. "You pick just the right time to ask. That's why you're going to wear this gag. Make as much noise as you want, it's fine, because it won't be a question. If you really need me to stop, just pull out the gag and we'll be done for tonight. But then we'll be done for tonight. Understand?"

"Yes, sir." Cassie responded in her extra-quiet, almost-a-whisper voice. I'd noticed that she got quiet whenever I was reprimanding her or explaining a particularly devious punishment I was about to inflict upon on her.

As I pressed the gag into her mouth and fastened it behind her head, I went on. " Tonight is all about you. Just lay back, and enjoy. Experience it. No games. As I told you earlier, I want you exactly as you are right now. But if I said yes, that would be a change, wouldn't it? You understand?"

With the gag, she couldn't respond with words. Instead, she nodded.

"Good girl."

Then I refocused my attention between her legs with renewed vigor. As I began, I glanced at the digital alarm clock beside Cassie's bed which read eleven twenty-one P.M.

Even though it was late, the coffee had given me a boost. I decided that I wouldn't stop until eleven fifty-one, a full half hour. She'd spent some quality time on me every night for over a week. Now it was her turn.

Cassie was moaning into her gag as I started, and her volume only increased from there. Within five minutes her whole body was shaking and bucking. She was shrieking into her gag. I probably shouldn't have been surprised that she was a screamer even without the whips and nipple clamps.

Cassie's thrashing became more intense as the minutes passed, and I had to hold her thighs apart with my hands as I continued. In spite of her intense reaction to what I was doing, she hadn't taken off the gag, so I kept going.

I couldn't tell whether she had already come and her thrashing was in response to increased sensitivity after her first orgasm, or whether she was still building. I was well aware that forcing a woman to have multiple orgasms could sometimes be painful for her, but then Cassie seemed to like pain.

I was determined to focus only on her pleasure that evening. However, if I still managed to push her boundaries by overloading her with pleasure, I was comfortable with that. Given that she hadn't touched the gag, I suspected Cassie was too.

My tongue was aching, and my arms were getting sore from holding her in place by the time the half hour was up. Cassie was covered in sweat, and though her thrashing and screaming had diminished I suspected that was because she was becoming worn out, not because my ministrations were any less overwhelming for her.

I sat up and brushed her hair out of her face. "I think it's finally time to fuck you. There's a condom in my pants pocket, no need to worry. I know we've done pretty much everything else, but it's still a big step. Nod your head if this is what you want."

Cassie nodded, as I knew she would.

I got up and got undressed, putting on the condom after removing my pants.

"You're beautiful," I told her, as I positioned myself on top. Then I entered her, and Cassie resumed moaning into her gag. "In fact, you're the most beautiful woman I've ever been with."

As I moved, she grabbed my ass and pulled me into her, her hips bucking eagerly in time with my thrusts. As far as I could tell, she wanted this as much as I did.

I sped up, pounding her as hard as I could. We were in the standard missionary position, but the way she was responding, her intensity and excitement made the experience extraordinary.

I couldn't last long. There could be no greater feeling than being inside Cassie as her body spasmed and clutched around me. I reached the edge quickly and then tumbled over.

I came, hard. It felt like I was pumping out pints of cum, even though I knew that in reality it was probably more like teaspoons.

When it was over I felt drained, both literally and figuratively. I pulled away and took off the condom, depositing it in the small trash basket I'd noticed in the niche under Cassie's night stand. Finally, I removed Cassie's gag, setting it beside her alarm clock.

Cassie didn't say anything, but instead wrapped her arms around me, crushing her body into mine. She was sweaty and breathing heavily, and so was I.

We lay there that way, holding each other in silence. I felt her body twitch every so often. After a few minutes, Cassie whispered in my ear: "You beautiful, sadistic bastard. I still haven't decided whether I should hate you, but I am pretty sure I love you."

"I—"

I hadn't expected her to drop the L-bomb, at least not tonight. Yet, how did I feel? I'd run after her like that for a reason. When I told her I wanted her and only her, I'd meant it.

"I think I love you too."

Cassie didn't say anything, but she held me even tighter than before. As we drifted off to sleep, she was holding me as if she were lost at sea, and I was her life-preserver.

I woke up at fifteen minutes past five the next morning. For a moment, I was startled to find myself in an unfamiliar bed, in unfamiliar surroundings. Then I felt Cassie next to me and the events of the previous night came flooding back.

I didn't have a change of clothes with me and I needed to get ready for work, but Cassie was still asleep. I decided to take a shower there, and then wrap a towel around myself afterwards to do the thirty foot dash back to my own apartment. The hallway usually wasn't that busy, it would probably be empty, and I really hoped Cassie would wake up so I could say goodbye before I left.

I took my time in the shower. I was already running late, but I'd worked late enough with Denise the previous night that I could get away with going into work a bit later than usual. I took an extra-long shower, allowing myself the time to wake up slowly and process what had happened the previous evening.

When I emerged, Cassie was up and waiting for me. She wore a thin, loose-fitting purple bathrobe that managed to conceal her nipples and little else. She'd left it open in front, and I had a good view of her crotch and plenty of cleavage. Even first thing in the morning, she was radiantly beautiful.

She held a mug in each hand and offered one to me. "Coffee, sir?"

"Thank you, but no need for the 'sir' just now," I told her, gratefully taking a mug. "Not that I wouldn't love to do more of that later, but I do need to get ready for work."

She looked disappointed. "You have to leave?"

"Well, I don't have a change of clothes here, and I think I might get some funny looks if I go to work naked."

"Hmm," she mused. "Funny. I doubt that's the right word for how Denise would be looking at you. But then, I suppose we can't let her get the wrong idea."

"Right." I didn't particularly want to start an argument. I bent down, collected my clothes from the floor, and pulled out my keys. "If the hall's clear, I'm going to go get dressed. Six thirty again tonight, as usual?"

She smiled again, then shivered. "I can't wait."

I kissed her goodbye, and turned to go. I had my keys out and ready in my right hand, my coffee in my left, and my clothes tucked under my right arm.

When Cassie saw my difficulty carrying all three things at once, she called out to me. "Why don't you leave your coffee here and come back when you're done changing. I'll make you breakfast."

Breakfast with Cassie sounded wonderful and given how late I already was, I decided I might as well push my luck and take another half hour or so. Denise and I had already finished almost everything that needed to be submitted that day, anyway. It wouldn't be too hard to get out my laptop and send a quick email to my boss when I went home to change.

"That would be great," I said to Cassie's obvious delight. "I'll be right back."

The hallway was empty, and I managed to sprint back to my place without being spotted wearing only the towel. Fifteen minutes later, I was sitting on a stool, enjoying an English muffin, and a few strips of bacon at a spot Cassie had cleared on her desk. She sat next to me, still wearing her purple bathrobe, which was still suggestively unbuttoned in the front

"This is delicious, thank you. Though, maybe next time we should eat at my place," I suggested. "My dining table might help."

"It might," she said. "When I was with Jared I spent most of my evenings out or at his place. Since we broke up, I haven't had many visitors. This is my office as much as home, and it's probably more suited to working than entertaining."

"Out here, maybe. Your bedroom, though— You seem to have that all ready."

"You like my collection?"

"Very impressive," I agreed.

There was a lull in the conversation, as we both focused on our food and coffee. Finally I broke the silence, by bringing up the idea that had been rolling around in my head all morning.

"I have a question for you. I don't know if this is the best time to bring it up, but here it is. Like I said last night, you're smart— which is a good thing!" I quickly added the clarification, remembering how emphatic Cassie was that her partner respect her intelligence.

"But, because you're smart, " I went on, "I have this suspicion that sooner or later you're going to trick me into saying yes. I was wondering: how hard would it be to get a hold of Jared, or maybe find another hypnotist, and just get rid of your habit altogether? Wouldn't that be for the best?"

When I looked over at Cassie, she was clearly terrified by my suggestion. She was trembling. Given her previous behavior, I already knew that smoking must have once been an important part of her life. Looking at her now, it hit me all over again just how much of her identity must have been wrapped up in it for her to react this way.