Kimberly & Debbie's Awakening To Each Other

Before we get into any detail, let us explain a little about ourselves and how this all stared for us. It was not something that just happened. We have had many conversions about female love and our growing feelings towards each other for a long time. We felt a little strange about these feelings and a bit embarrassed because everyone always puts down lesbianism and people like us are made to feel ashamed. In fact, it has only been very recently that we have felt comfortable about using the term lesbian, as the majority of people who form same sex relationships often prefer to be referred to as “gay”.

When we originally started to have feelings for each other, we both decided and agreed to seek out as much information as we could, as well as, to attend counselling sessions. It was through these sessions that we also expressed our feelings about the similar experiences we had during our earlier years.

Interestingly, we had shared very similar experiences of abuse, by a family member. Without going into too much detail, our abuse was physical, emotional and sexual. At times this abuse was quite violent. We had also experienced the feelings of shame, particularly about the incidence of incest and of our powerlessness in not being able to stop the abuse, as we could not control what was happening. We also experienced feelings of worthlessness and also felt unclean. We felt like we existed on the fringes of society and were not sure whom we could trust, as we had heard stories about how society sometimes attempts to sweep these matters under the carpet.

Through our counselling we have come to terms with our experiences and we firmly believe that neither of us want any form of physical/sexual relationship with men. We believe that it is through our previous experience with men and especially with members of our own families that we felt more comfortable in the presence of women, which also lead us to seek the emotional support and the tenderness of love between women.

Our “Awakening” took place on 05/April/03. Our story began innocently enough, with our parents going away for the weekend. Debbie, my foster sister and I had planned our sexual awaking to lesbianism for some time and as our parents were going to be away the timing was right.

We had begun to organize our room for the big event. We had soft music one song in particular Debbie loved, as on many accessions I would sing, Roy Orbison’s “She’s A Mystery Girl,” and play my guitar for her. We even went shopping and bought coloured candles to symbolize. White - Purity, truth sincerity, Light Blue – Tranquility, understanding, patience, and health. Red - Strength, health, vigor and sexual loves. This was going to be our special night of sensual love; our love for each other would last forever!

We had lit the candles before hand. Debbie was first to bath then myself. As I bathed, I thought, that going to bed this times it would be very different, as we would be going to bed with each other, and that tonight we would be touching each other sexually, for the first time. When I retuned to our room, Debbie awaited she was already in bed. She looked so soft and beautiful as the candlelight reflected on her face. I seemed to be trembling as I made my way to the bed; I guess it was the fear of the unknown.

My heart racing and I guessed that Debbie’s would have been as well. I climbed into our bed, our eyes met we became aware of each other. Blushing, we froze, looking into each other’s eyes - not knowing quite what to do next!

Our uneasiness was soon replaced with a beautiful tranquil feeling that seemed to be flowing through our entire bodies. This new feeling was so enchanting to us, that we just laid side-by-side, facing each other and looking deep into each other’s eyes. The moment was finally broken when, Debbie kissed me. Debbie had kissed me on many previous occasions, but it was the kiss of a sister. This kiss was different, it was filled with such emotion – loving, sensual, longing and tender. This kiss was everything I had always imagined it would be!

I eagerly responded my tongue explored her mouth our tongues entwined, my hand running through her hair our bodies lost to some kind of new magical feelings. As my hand moved from Debbie’s hair I proceeded to run my hand down her back and through to her legs. Debbie shivered with delight as I continued to explore the sensual parts of her body. Debbie sighed with pleasure as my hand moved along her inner thigh. She was breathing heavily as my hand roamed across her tummy and connected with her breasts. As her body responded to my touch, her nipples became erect.

Debbie responds by pressing her tongue deeper into my wanting mouth. I could now feel her hand caressing my breast ever so softly. My nipples were being gently caressed, as she pressed her warm body closer to mine.

I was now on top of Debbie and I admired her beauty, she reminded me of an angel, bathed in moonlight. I wondered if she was experiencing the same feelings of warmth, pleasure and love as I was.

As I leaned over her brushing her hair away from her ear I whispered, “I love you.” Then kissing her earlobe gently I nibbled it between my lips; she quivered momentarily as my tongue moved down her neck softly, her body rose from the bed as I sat back to look at her again, my long hair fell to one side of her face as I went to kiss her eyes, they reminded of twinkling stars. As I lowered myself down to kiss those twinkling stars, her lips met mine, and we continued to kiss passionately.

In some strange and mystical way it felt so very right. I continued to kiss Debbie’s neck and allowed my mouth to drift on past her shoulders and towards her breasts. My tongue lingered around her nipples. I slowly moved my tongue towards her navel and nibbled at the creases in her flesh. Debbie seemed to be responding with delight to my every move and moaned with pleasure. She clasped the back of my head with her hand as if she wished me to continue. I then moved towards the lowest point of her stomach and kissed it gently. I then allowed my fingers to enter her and for a moment I experienced the warmth of her wetness, which reminded me of a rose freshened by the first rains of spring.

Debbie gently raised her body and tenderly began to explore the pleasures of my body. She now lay atop of me, my excitement as her body sweeps over me, her nipples pressed against mine. She rubs her breast up and down my body, stopping to reassure me with a kiss. Now Debbie delicately runs her tongue down my neck to the tops of my breasts. I feel my nipples between her fingers as she pinching them softly and then I feel her mouth upon the other. My body is on fire as Debbie’s hand moved from my breast to the top of my inner thigh. She moves down my body, her mouth and tongue still touching me, now she is kissing my inner thighs with such tenderness and beauty.

Consumed by our desire – we felt the need to explore our sexual experience further, at this time we delved into the pleasures of the warm, sensual Masturbation of each other. Finally, not a word said between us, just the sounds of our breathing, still hard and then softer, followed by periods of silence, as we lay there in each other’s arms

Later we looked at each other, and the embarrassment that was there in the beginning, was no longer. We giggled at each other then kissed, and realised how lucky we were to have found each other. From that day on, made a special promise, to stay together and never let anyone or anything come between us.

There are many people out there just like us. Many of you believe you are totally alone because of societies beliefs, how we are conditioned and how people treat us. Remember, you are not alone; there is always someone out there who cares.

At times, we all feel especially vulnerable and lonely. We very rarely truly connect with people, and for a lot of the time, we’re on our own. It is in that lonely space where our thoughts look for some kind of real love and affection. Knowing such things, as young people, can be a trying and painful experience. We had this experience and for us, it has made us stronger, and who we are today.

P.s. We tried very hard, in sharing this experience, and we did not wish to offend anyone, especially women. We dedicated a song by Helen Ready, “I am Women.” All that you have read, it comes from our hearts. Our enthusiasm to love each other will not be spoiled by societies’ beliefs.

We started to drift away to that little enchanted world some people call sleep. Where we often go together to be safe?

God Bless

Love Kimberly & Debbie