LBFM Pt. 05

Every word hit her like a body blow especially the last comment about having children as it was me who hadn't wanted any more after Dan was born despite her pleading.

Her face fell but then grew flushed with rage and her voice grew loud and shrill.

"You couldn't possibly have developed a relationship this quickly so you must have been fucking her every time you came to Hong Kong in the past. She's been your bit on the side for months and years I reckon."

I laughed mirthlessly.

"Where are you going with this? Do you think you will get a better divorce settlement by accusing me of adultery? Dream on! In any case I only met Jess 10 days ago and it was ... it was ... love at first sight and it just keeps on getting better."

I decided to really go for the jugular.

"Do you know, she reminds of a younger version of you? She makes me feel young again!"

I don't know whether Jan remembered using those same words to me but she certainly didn't like the inference and started to rant. I shouted for silence and this brought a nurse into the compartment and she looked at the pair of us.

"Mrs. King you are getting my patient agitated and I cannot have that. Can you please moderate your voice go and sit down elsewhere. Mr. King are you ok, can I get you something?"

"Yes, I need to make a phone call. Can you ask the pilot if that is possible?"

"I know it is because we do it all the time. I'll get the sat-phone for you."

She left to get it and I looked at Jan who stood mute and white with rage. I decided to try and bury the hatchet and spoke softly to her.

"Look I'm sorry it didn't work out with Steven. I know you were sure it was what you wanted but I can't just put it behind me like it never happened especially as I've met someone new. Yes it was quick but that doesn't change how Jess and I feel about each other. Before you mention it ... she's 31 ... a lot younger than me ... but ... pot ... kettle! It was something you were going to do and maybe it won't work out for me either but I want to try."

I think my gentle tone had a greater effect than if I'd been ranting. Her face crumpled and she started to sob as she realised the position she had got herself into. I felt sorry for her and 20 plus years of loving her hadn't just vanished so I reached my good hand out to squeeze hers. This just made her sobbing increase in intensity and she sat down by the bed to compose herself.

After a while she calmed down.

"I've been a fool. You've always been a good man ... a good husband ... a good father ... but as I got to 40 I wanted something more and thought Steven was the answer ... but you were right he didn't want a commitment to any woman, not just me. Apparently he'd been seeing another mum from the school as well. I'm just a complete fool and feel so embarrassed."

She started to sob again and got up to leave as the nurse returned with the sat-phone. I asked her to get my phone so I could retrieve Jess's number. I punched in the digits and waited for the connection which was surprisingly quick.

It went straight through to a recorded voice telling me the phone was switched off.

I tried 3 more times in the next hour but with the same result as I flew further and further away from Hong Kong and the woman I loved.

Chapter 14.

The next few weeks passed very slowly.

In the early days Jan tried very hard to care for me and provide for my every wish. She obviously thought that she could re-ingratiate herself back into my affections and things could go on as before. After a couple of days when I started online searches for Jess she soon realised that this was not going to happen anytime soon and passed nursing duties over to a agency nurse and I hardly saw her as she kept to the guest quarters when she was at the house.

We eventually had a long an emotional talk about the future and agreed that divorce was the way forward whether I made contact with Jess or not. I was still planning to go back to HK and she could remain in the house whilst I was away and we'd sort out the future when I came back.

The physiotherapy for my hand and ankle had been a bitch but eventually I'd started to regain full use of both. My ribs, vertebrae and skull had healed and there had been no need to remove my damaged kidney so I was ready to return to work after spending all this time cooped up at home trying to find a way of contacting Jess.

Because we had been together all the time we had only ever exchanged phone numbers and I had no idea of her email address and only had a vague idea of where she lived in the Philippines. I had continued to ring her number but to no avail as the phone remained switched off until one day when it rang out for several seconds before being answered ... by someone speaking Chinese!

I asked for Jess but got a volley of Chinese.

I asked if they or someone spoke English ... and got another volley of Chinese.

Sadly I disconnected the call.

I didn't know the implication of someone else answering. Had she had passed the phone onto someone else or had she been mugged? I had no idea whether it was her phone or one that was shared with other bargirls when she was back in the Phillipines. Had she just sold it as she wasn't going back to HK?

I had no other means of contacting her but decided that I had to try something. I joined Facebook and tried 'friending' every Jessica Arroyo in the Philippines but got no responses that were of any use although an old lady said I should look her up if I ever went to Manila! I thought about doing the same with Melissa as she was more likely to be on Facebook but stopped short as I didn't want to come across as some old pervert contacting young girls on the internet.

"Hi Melissa, are you a 13 year old girl with a mother called Jessica? Can we be friends as I'm trying to contact her?"

Yeah, right!

I tried another approach.

I knew she lived outside central Manila in Quezon near the university where her mother was a nurse and housekeeper for a retired professor who was wheel-chair bound. It was a very expensive district but fortunately the professor provided a small apartment over the garage so the nurse was available 24/7. I then went through the online electoral register and found a Maria Arroyo in Matandang and with further searches narrowed her probable address to a couple of streets in Ayala Heights.

All I needed to do now was to get to Manila and start knocking on doors until I found her or, at least, her mother.

Simples!

Chapter 15.

The flight back to Hong Kong was just as emotional for me as the previous trip but for very different reasons.

I'd said goodbye to the boys who had been on school holidays for most of my recuperation period and it was probably the longest time I'd spent with them since they were small. They were concerned about the divorce but were relieved that Jan would stay in the family home thus providing some stability whilst I was away. They were excited at the prospect of coming to Hong Kong in their next vacation but I was feeling dislocated as I flew out of Heathrow. Somehow the challenge of the job had paled after my near-death experience and the real reason I was going back was to find Jess.

I'd arranged to stay in the Holiday Inn for one night before moving out to the villa, which was still under lease, and after my ritual return trip on the Star Ferry I made my way to Harry's Bar.

There was a chance Jess was back working or that I could talk with Chen or Anna to find out where she was.

I was sorely disappointed.

I didn't recognise any of the girls and there were two different 'managers' at the end of the bar. One small and the other very large.

I opened up the selfie we'd taken on the way to Lamma all those weeks ago and showed it to the bar staff but they all said that they didn't recognise her and that they were new.

New? All of them?

I then went to the two guys at the end of the bar and asked if they could contact Chen for me. They looked at me blankly.

"Who Chen?"

"One of your colleagues I presume. He was here about 3 months ago."

I could see a brief light of recognition go on in their eyes before impassive masks were lowered. The big man answered.

"Ah ... Chen. He not here anymore. He in Macau."

"Could you get a message to him and tell him that David King would like to speak to him."

At this point there was a real look of recognition in both their faces.

"You Mr. Fuck King! Chen said if you come back to say 'Fuck you Fuck King'. He He ... good English joke that."

I wasn't amused but I guess I understood Chen's position. I showed them the picture of Jess.

"Has this girl been working here since you started?"

They didn't look at it but knew who it was.

"You looking for Cookie? She not come back. She hides. Now go away. Don't come back or we finish Lavrov's job."

I started to get angry and leaned in close to the big guy to show I wasn't intimidated.

"What's your fucking problem? I'm just looking for a girl. I'm not here to hassle you."

The small guy responded in much better English.

"The problem, Mr. King, is that you caused us a lot of disruption. The police raided the hotel and closed this place down for a while. Chen and others had to leave HK as Mr. Feng took it as a personal insult that we had allowed the situation to develop to point where you were injured. We had a lot of pressure from the local authorities who were getting heat from Beijing. Hong Kong may be vaguely autonomous but we all know who pulls the strings"

"Take that up with Lavrov, not me."

"No, Mr. King I can't because Lavrov is dead. He somehow fell over and hit his head whilst in custody. Apparently Stepov was so overcome with grief he hung himself in his cell. So the only part of the problem left is you! Now I don't want to annoy Mr. Feng anymore so I'll not do anything to you so long as you stay away from my operation. Do I make myself clear?"

I stepped back and nodded. I reached into my pocket and they were suddenly very wary and the big guy's hand moved to the inside of his jacket.

"Its ok guys I'm just getting a business card so you can ring me if Cookie does show up again. You'll call me if she does because I wouldn't want any more heat to affect your operation than necessary and I'll make it worth your while. Do I make myself clear?"

The small guy nodded and put a restraining hand on the large man's arm.

I gave them my card and went to my room.

Chapter 16.

I made the trip out to Lamma alone and lonely and was in a poor frame of mind when I picked the key up from Andrew Croft although he tried to keep the 'I told you so' look off his face as he enquired whether I was fully recovered.

I didn't really want to talk to him but realised he had probably seen Jess before she left HK.

"Yes thank you, I'm better now and due to start work again next Monday. Can you tell me something, did Jess hand the key back or was it someone from the office?"

He checked in a log book for keys.

"Apparently Ms. Arroyo brought them back 6 days after she signed them out. That's when she told me you'd been injured."

I did the calculation. She had taken it back the day after I'd been put on the plane so had probably been in Hong Kong when I tried to ring her. I could understand why she would have left when she did.

"Has anyone been in there since?"

"Yes, I had a look in after she handed the key back just to check whether there was any damage but the place was neat and tidy apart from a scorched carpet which we have replaced and charged it against the deposit your company paid over."

I nodded in understanding and took the bunch of keys, signed the log book and made the short journey to the villa.

The feeling of being alone and lonely intensified as I entered the property and looked into the living area. The sofa was still where it had been when I'd arrived before only there was no naked Jess bound and gagged on it. The recollections came flooding back and I started to cry so hurriedly left the room and looked at the rest of the place.

Jess had hung my clothes in one side of a large walk-in wardrobe and I noticed that she had left all of the clothes that I had bought her in the other side.

This made me cry even more.

I felt like she was waving two fingers at me by rejecting my gifts to her and trashing the memory of what we had together.

I looked in the kitchen and found a bottle of Champagne in the fridge which she must have bought on the first day to celebrate our setting up home together.

The tears continued to flow.

I sat down at the breakfast bar and mourned what I may have lost as I remembered those wonderful few days we had. It was like parting after a holiday romance although on this occasion there had been no final kiss, no tear-stained promise to write or a suggested meeting at the earliest opportunity.

There was just a forced separation and whilst I knew how I felt I had no idea whether Jess was angry at me or if she felt betrayed.

I couldn't sit there wallowing in self-pity so went out to a supermarket for some food and alcohol ... plenty of alcohol! As I was putting stuff away and removing packaging I noticed some torn up scraps of paper in the bottom of the trash can.

I fished them out and reassembled the sheet of A4 which was flyer for a local restaurant but it what was written on the back that first gave me hope and then cause for concern.

Dear special man,

You have gone and I am lost here without you.

This had been crossed out and she had tried again in a tone full of worry.

David

What's going on? Why did your wife come??

This too had been crossed out and the penultimate lines were angry.

I did not expect that from you. I thought you were different but you are just the same as every other man.

She had deleted this line with a heavy pen stroke as though ashamed of herself for having let such thoughts intrude. She had obviously been flooded with different emotions and it seemed that she had gone through the whole grief cycle in an attempt to compose something.

The final line was heart-rending for me as it must have been for her.

We did not say goodbye and that hurts me more than anything

I presume at this point she decided to tear up the letter.

Dearest Jess, I got the message.

It confirmed that my decision to fly to Manila over the weekend was overdue.

Assuming I could track her down!

Chapter 17.

The flight to Manila the following day was only 2 hours but seemed much longer and I landed at 10.00 in the morning but despite having only carry-on luggage it still took nearly an hour to get through the chaos that is Manila's airport and another hour to get to Quezon by taxi.

Midday found me wandering up and down the two streets that I identified as being the possible address for Jess's mother. I was looking for houses with a garage with living space over the top but this was not as easy as I had thought, so I resorted to knocking on every door or, more precisely, pushing intercom buttons at the front gates.

On my first pass on the two streets I had counted 58 residences and it took two hours to go round all of them and got no positive news. There was no response from a number of them which meant that I would have to come back again in the afternoon or tomorrow morning.

No one I spoke to had heard of Maria Arroyo and those that spoke decent English could not help me with locating an aged professor. I'd been rudely told to fuck off by two people, one of which was an attractive woman driving out of her drive in an expensive Mercedes sports car.

It just goes to prove that money doesn't buy you class.

I retreated to the nearest bar to lick my wounds and after several beers went back to those with no response. This time I got an answer from about half leaving 11 to do all over again in the morning as I did not want to be walking the streets in the dark. I found a taxi rank near the church and took one to downtown Manila.

I had booked a room in the Holiday Inn and the check-in procedure was slightly bizarre. Along with all the regular stuff the girl enquired whether I was planning to have 'company' as I would need to let the floor security guard know and give my 'guest' a signed form when they left.

They have obviously had sex tourists before!

I, of course, spent a lonely evening, unaccompanied, and ate a room service meal before going to bed early as I wanted to be back in Quezon before people started leaving to go out to church or any other Sunday activity.

The following morning I got responses, but no help, from 9 of those that been out the previous day and decided that the missing two were probably away for the weekend. I left a note about my search that I'd prepared for such eventuality at these two asking them to contact me if they could help. It was with a heavy heart I started the journey back to central Manila to collect my case and go out to the airport.

A police car passed me on the other side of the road with two occupants one of whom was staring at me but I thought nothing of it until it pulled up alongside me and gave a single whoop of it's' siren and turned on it's flashing lights. I'd seen enough movies to know what this meant so stopped as the two police officers got out of the vehicle. The one nearest me put his hand on his holster and said something in a language I didn't understand while the other stood at the back of the car with his hand near his gun.

I was more than a little bit perturbed.

"I'm sorry but I don't understand you. What do you want?"

He answered in good but accented English.

"Who are you and what are you doing in this neighbourhood? We have received a complaint about you hanging around and harassing the residents. Can I see some ID?"

"I'm looking for someone who lives near here but don't know the exact address. I've been asking everyone if they know this person. But no-one does."

He looked suspiciously at me.

"The residents are worried that you are a burglar checking on who is at home. ID please!"

I started to reach into the inside pocket of my jacket for my passport which got them very agitated and their hands moved closer to their guns. I nervously moved my hand away.

"I'm just reaching for my passport. I'm a British citizen visiting the country. Is it ok if I get it?"

The policeman nodded but kept his hand on his gun while his partner actually drew his weapon and pointed it at me.

I was crapping myself.

Things relaxed slightly when I produced my passport but the man nearest me made sure not to obscure his colleague's view of me as he took it and looked at it and me several times obviously checking whether it was my photo. He turned to get back into the vehicle leaving his colleague guarding me.

"Stay there I'll check with immigration."

I could see him typing my passport details into a laptop and after a while he looked back at me and then the screen. After a while he got out of the car looking slightly more relaxed and nodded to his colleague who put his gun away.

"Ok, Mr. King. You are who you say you are but you need to leave this area. Who are you looking for and why do you think they live here?"

I explained about losing touch with Jess in Hong Kong and my online search of the register of electors to track her or Maria down and how I'd narrowed the precinct down to these two streets. He seemed touched by my dedication to finding Jess and the story of lost love so went to check on his computer again for any details of Maria or Jess but came back shrugging his shoulders.

"If they live near here they are not registered. The Maria Arroyo you found on the list of electors is not the one. She was 92 and died 3 months ago but did not live in these streets as the precinct also has the two cross streets. It is possible that the people you seek are registered at another address elsewhere in Manila Metro area but stay at this professor's house without being registered. Unfortunately I cannot help further as there are lots of Maria Arroyo's in Manila and I have no way of identifying retired professors. I wish you luck with your search but please leave the area immediately."