Let It Go

One of the biggest challenges I am currently working on has to do with my daughter. To be honest, I have never submitted a story on this platform involving my family for many reasons. Considering that this challenge is very near to me, and it has been consuming my mind in many ways, I feel like I need to address it.

First, let me present a little background. My daughter is currently twenty-five years old. She is a college graduate. She has her vices but is a good person. She is a Graphic Arts major. She is a hard worker and makes things happen for herself. And until the middle of October, she lives with me. She let us know back in July that she intends to move to Eugene, Oregon with a friend of hers she has had since Middle School. This friend of hers who moved down there was conned to do so because her aunt needed support. My daughter is excited about the move because she is moving out of the house and wants to start her new life.

As for me, I'm not ready. Or at least I wasn't until yesterday. This will be the first time she has moved out of the house ever. It's hard on me because I treasure having her presence around. It feels like a part of my already fractured heart is going away. Or at least it did until I was pondering about it yesterday on the way home from work.

One of my little quirks I have, and for the record this is the first time I am admitting it to anyone, is that I talk to myself while driving. I simply turn off the radio and reason things out. It helps me a bunch. I can only imagine what it looks like to the other cars around me. I thought about the correlation between Frozen and The Prodigal Son. Yeah, a children's movie and a Bible Story.

The main thing I got from Frozen is the way sometimes parents can hold their kids back. Elsa had thee ice powers, which isn't a spoiler because anyone who has seen the "Let It Go" or "Into the Unknown" videos on YouTube has seen that. When she developed them, her parents restricted her from using them for whatever reason. So, after her parents died, she plunged the whole area into Winter. She was lashing out. Partly due to her own emotions. Because she was not allowed to learn about her abilities and learn to control them better, it put her land into jeopardy. I don't want to restrict my daughter. She has the capability to grow so much, and I want her to.

So how does this correlate to the Prodigal Son? Because the father in that story didn't hold his son back. His son, one day, told his father he wanted his share of the inheritance. His father gave it to him. Then his son went away and wasted it all until there was nothing left. As he sat in a pigpen alone and desolate, he reasoned out that all his father's servants were taken care of. He reasoned that he could go back and become one of his father's servants because he screwed up. As he headed back, his father saw him and ran to him to hug him. The son told his father that he was unworthy to be called his son and he wanted to come back to serve him. His father told his servants to bring his son a robe, put a ring on his hand and let's celebrate. During the celebration, his eldest son complained because he was a good son and they never celebrated him. His father explained that his brother returning was like someone coming back from the dead.

Okay, stay with me. I'm not preaching.

So how does this correlate to Frozen? The father let his son figure things out, albeit at an expensive cost. When things became too much for his son, his son returned. One of the things my daughter and I discussed was that we would always have a place for her. In my mind, it's one of the things that was a no-brainer. My dad did the same for me when I enlisted in the Army, was discharged, went up here to the Pacific Northwest and returned with my new wife in tow almost twenty-seven years ago. This was normal to me. Her friend was not so lucky because after she moved down to Oregon, her parents sold the house and moved to a different place.

I guess in a way, it makes sense that I am accepting this. After all, I know she can handle it. I know she is smart enough, hard-working enough to handle things. The hardest part for me is just the knowledge that if something happens, she'll be five hours away. Thing is when you care about someone whether it's your children, your spouse, your family members or even your best friends, distance is the one thing that makes your heart hurt when they need you. That's when all you can do is support them the best you can.

Next month, I am following my daughter down there to make sure her car makes it. I am also going to meet the aunt and check out her new place. I'll spend the night in a hotel before driving the five hours back to my house. In a way, it's the sendoff I think she needs and that I need. Letting go is difficult. It takes time to allow things to settle and to work itself out. I'm not going to be happy at first. The thing is I know she will be and that will make me happier in the long run.