Let's Be Batman Pt. 48

Tommy, Barbara Gordon, and Zatanna all looked at each other as they let Tommy's sentence hang in the air of the Batcave. Barbara wore a skeptical expression. Tommy looked confused. And Zatanna looked... well, Zatanna looked as beautiful as she always did.

"So a portal that connects our reality to other universes," Barbara said slowly, repeating what Tommy and Zatanna had just told her. "That's... huh," She said. She absent-mindedly chewed on her pen.

"That's what she said," Tommy said, shrugging. He had no idea what was going on.

"Are you sure that's what she meant?" Barbara asked. "Maybe she made it up to throw you off the scent."

Zatanna shook her head. "I don't think so. Bruce and I were pretty... persuasive." Tommy and Zatanna both smirked. Tala had been right; bringing someone to the brink of pleasure and then denying them was a pretty good way to get them to give information.

"Okay," Barbara said slowly, still trying to comprehend what they were looking for. "I'll start looking for a portal, I guess." She turned towards Tommy. "Have you seen anything like this anywhere? I guess it would look like... a portal."

Tommy thought. 'I wonder if Barbara have ever kissed. That would rule.'

Out loud, he said, "...Nope."

Zatanna shook her head again. "I haven't either. This type of thing shouldn't be in Gotham. It must have been moved here."

Barbara sighed. "If only Bruce were here, he'd..." She trailed off and her eyes went wide when she realized what she'd said.

Zatanna looked confused. "What do you mean, Bruce is right here."

Tommy and Barbara looked at each other, both afraid to speak. Tommy finally broke the silence.

"Funny story about that actually, Zatanna. You see, Bruce needed to go do some secret mission and-"

"You're... you're not Bruce?" Zatanna asked softly. She seemed struck dumb. "That means..."

"Zatanna, I can expl-" Barbara started to say.

"You son of a BITCH!" Zatanna suddenly yelled. She took off her top hat and began to beat Tommy over the head with it, striking him again and again.

"Hey!" Tommy said with surprise, shielding himself from Zatanna's assault. He stepped backwards but Zatanna followed him, slapping with both hands on Tommy's head and shoulders.

"Zatanna, please!" Barbara said. "Bruce didn't tell any of us!"

"Did he tell whoever this is to screw me while pretending to be Bruce?" Zatanna retorted. "Twice?!"

This time it was Barbara's turn to look surprised. "He did that?" She asked Zatanna. The magician nodded.

"Oh, well then go ahead," Barbara said.

Zatanna eagerly complied, striking Tommy again and again. "Bastard!" and "Fucker" were heard over and over again as Zatanna beat Tommy. He was helpless to respond to her violence; he didn't want to hurt her and, more importantly, he didn't want her to hurt him worse than she was already doing.

"Please, I can explain!" Tommy finally said as he fell to the floor of the Batcave, one hand held up defensively.

"How can you possibly explain your actions?" Zatanna asked him in anger. Looking beyond her, Tommy could see Barbara looking at him skeptically.

"Well, it's just that..." Tommy said, "It's just that you're, like, super hot and-"

Zatanna began to beat upon Tommy once more, striking him again and again. She reached for her wand and held it out at him menacingly, presumably to turn him into a newt or something worse.

"Zatanna, wait," Barbara said, saving Tommy. "He's a horrible person but Bruce is gone. We need someone to be Batman."

Zatanna's eyes flashed anger towards Tommy and then looked back with resentment towards Barbara. Slowly, she lowered her wand and put it away.

"Fine," She said softly, turning towards Barbara. "But don't let... what is his name?"

Barbara thought for a moment, opened her mouth to speak, and then closed it again. Her brow furrowed.

"Tommy," Tommy finally said, somewhat annoyed. He'd known Barbara for months and she still didn't know his name.

"Oh, right," Barbara said, snapping her fingers.

"Whatever your name is," Zatanna said, facing Tommy know, "Stay away from me or I will have a rabbit bite off your dick." Zatanna breathed heavily, her anger slowly subsiding. After a moment, she turned to Barbara.

"So... where is Bruce, then? He wouldn't just disappear," Zatanna said. She was starting to get concerned.

"I... I don't know," Barbara said. "He and Superman stepped into some sort of portal and... wait!" Barbara turned to Tommy hurriedly. "Didn't you say that Batman and Superman stepped into some kind of portal?"

Tommy thought. "Hey... yeah, they did!" He said. Finally, they were getting somewhere.

"And where were they?" Barbara asked.

"They were in the Batcave," Tommy replied. All three of them began to look around. But there was nothing there.

"But... the portal can't be here," Barbara said. "If it was, I'd know about it. I'll bring up the video, maybe it will provide a clue."

Barbara typed into the computer. She frowned.

"There's no video!" She said with agitation. "It looks like it was deleted." Barbara and Zatanna both frowned at Tommy. "But there is a video that was downloaded at that date, let's see what that... oh that's disgusting."

"Oops," Tommy said. They had found his porn.

"What is wrong with you?" Barbara and Zatanna both said at once. Tommy shrugged.

"So Batman and Superman went through this portal that connects our universe to something else," Zatanna said. "And they didn't want anyone to know about it. That means that-"

"-Bruce suspected that someone we trust might be involved," Barbara finished. "We know someone is working with Lex but we don't know who. We asked The Riddler for help, to see if he could solve this little puzzle."

"Has he gotten anywhere?" Zatanna asked.

"We're not..." Tommy began, before Zatanna's angry eyes stopped his speech.

"We're not sure," Barbara continued. "We haven't heard from him in a few days. Batman, go-"

"Tommy," Zatanna corrected. "He's no Batman." She glared at Tommy.

"Go to The Riddler's hideout and see what he's found," Barbara told Tommy. Tommy nodded and picked himself up off the ground.

"I'm going to check a few things, see if I can't find out about this portal," Zatanna said. She picked her hat off the ground and dusted it off. She put it on her head and headed towards the exit.

"Zatanna," Barbara called after her. "Bruce didn't tell anyone where he was going and made this idiot his replacement for a reason. I hope you'll keep this between us."

Zatanna thought for a moment and then softened. "I'll do it for Bruce," She said. Then she hardened again and gave Tommy one last glare. "And I hope he comes back soon." She turned and left.

After she had gone, Barbara shook her head at Tommy.

"You really are a horrible person," She told him.

"Yeah," Tommy agreed.

***

The next night, Tommy was on his way to see The Riddler. Barbara hoped he might have an insight into where they could find this portal, or possibly why exactly Lex Luthor wanted it, or who was working with Luthor, or... anything really.

'Fuck, this shit is so confusing,' Tommy thought.

While Tommy made his way across Gotham, he thought about the previous night's events. For once, he wasn't thinking about the sex part.

No, Tommy did feel a little guilty about what had happened with Zatanna. He had slept with a lot of women under false pretenses (a LOT of women), but Zatanna was likely the only one that thought he was Bruce Wayne. It made the betrayal more severe, more personal, and he was genuinely sorry once he saw how upset the truth had made her.

He absolutely would do it again, obviously, but he still felt bad about it.

In truth, the thing Tommy missed most about Black Canary was... well, it was her ass, but the thing he missed second most was the fact that when he was with her he was Tommy, not Batman. The other people in his life couldn't even remember his actual name (thanks, Barbara) and, more importantly, didn't care to. Nobody liked him for him. The only person they cared about was-

"Batman!"

A booming voice filled the air and a bright light filled Tommy's vision. He had been passing by the outskirts of Archie Goodwin International Airport so at first Tommy thought it was an airplane, but as his eyes adjusted to the light he realized that the shape was all wrong. It wasn't an airplane, it was... a portal.

'Another Goddamn portal,' Tommy thought.

Tommy thought for a moment that this might be THE portal, suddenly and fortuitously opening up directly in front of him, but he soon realized that this portal was too small to be the one Tala had described. This portal was human-sized, glowing blue, and some sort of creature was emerging from it.

Though the light of the portal was blurring Tommy's vision, he was able to tell that the creature was wearing a long, flowing robe. It looked like the alien had a boxy head but Tommy realized it was wearing a hat. It looked human, although Tommy doubted that it was.

"Batman! Come forth!" The alien yelled. Its arms extended out, as if it was greeting a crowd of thousands. Tommy cautiously stepped forward, unsure of what exactly was going on. Tommy neared the ship, slowly making out the figure standing before him. It was a woman, middle-aged, with black lips and high, arching eyebrows. She looked like the pope, or at least a cardinal.

The alien woman held her arms high, speaking in a grand voice. Tommy looked behind him, expecting to see an audience.

'Nope, just me,' Tommy thought. Aloud, he said, "...Yeah? What can I do for you?"

"Batman, it my great pleasure to introduce to you the Mighty Warrior, the Pride of The Pisces Constellation, the Savior of the Seventh Realm, The-"

"Tell him something about how beautiful I am," Came a whisper from beyond the portal.

Sazu looked behind her and nodded. "The... the Beauty of... The Unsurpassed Beauty, the Bright Star of this or any universe, The Queen of Almerac, I-"

"More about my beauty, Sazu!" The whisper came again. "He needs to be impressed."

Sazu, the herald, sighed. She looked up, probing her imagination. "The... Glori... The Bodacious... (sigh)... The Great Maxima!" Sazu, the herald, turned towards the portal and began clapping fervently. Through the portal stepped the glorious, bodacious, awe-inspiring Maxima.

"A pleasure, Batman," Maxima said, her hands on her hips and striking a regal pose. Her chin was high and her chest was puffed out. The queen of Almerac was indeed beautiful, a fact that Tommy picked up on immediately. Maxima was tall and grand, her thick red hair flowing softly in the breeze. She wore a green cape that went to her knees and not much else: a green breastplate covered her ample chest and green panties covered her sensitive areas, along with a few accessories. She wore bright gold earrings that matched her bright gold boots. Green gloves covered her hands. Her lack of clothes contrasted with her assistant's head-to-toe garb.

"Jesus Fuck," Tommy muttered to himself. He had totally forgotten about The Riddler, the portal or his name; now all he could think about was Maxima's huge tits and tight body. He absent-mindedly adjusted his dick beneath his suit.

"Batman," Sazu began, "The Great Maxima has seen fit to grant you a rare opportunity! As you may be aware, the mighty planet Almerac has for generations provided the universe the finest crop of warriors anyone has ever seen, culminating in our queen." Maxima raised her head higher at these words. Tommy wondered if these two had rehearsed this little spiel.

"Hoping to bring Almeracian bloodlines to even greater heights, our ingenious Queen Maxima tested every Almeracian man in hopes of finding a mate. Alas, none of them matched up to the impossibly high standards of our mighty, spectacular, wondrous, no-"

"Ahem," Maxima said. She glared at Sazu, who flinched slightly in response. The herald continued.

"Our queen then turned her eyes to the stars, in her infinite wisdom hoping that we might find someone that is worthy of her awesome love. And, turning to Earth, our magnificent, sensational queen found a man worthy of her..."

Tommy's ears perked up.

"Superman," Sazu finished. "But, alas, he is nowhere to be found. So, Maxima turned to Earth's second mightiest hero..."

Tommy smiled slightly.

"Captain Marvel," Sazu finished. Tommy slumped. "But his background makes him...ill-suited for this sort of thing. And on and on Maxima continued, beseeching hero after hero in her search for a mate. And, once all the worthwhile ones had been vetted, Maxima thought of giving up. But, finally, she decided to make one last venture towards a final Earth hero: you."

"...Huh?" Tommy asked. This story was getting a little long and to be honest he had stopped paying attention.

Sazu tried to clarify. "What I am trying to say is that the astonishing, fascinating... astounding... did I say awe-inspiring already...?"

Maxima groaned and pushed her subordinate to the side. "I want your seed," Maxima told Tommy.

"You want my... you want my cum?" Tommy asked. Maxima had indeed astonished him.

"Yes," Maxima said. "You are not worthy of becoming my husband, quite obviously. You don't even have any powers! Gods forbid I took you back to Almerac, they'd revolt on the spot. But you do have a certain cleverness about you and I think I can combine that with my everything else to create a formidable heir that will rule Almerac for a thousand centuries!" Maxima raised her fist triumphantly at her final words.

Tommy took in Maxima's words. He was half-offended, half-excited. The idea that he wasn't worthy of being her husband took him aback (even without powers he was better than some chucklefuck like Aquaman) but, on the other hand, fucking Maxima without any strings attached was just what he was looking for.

"But if I'm not worthy of being your husband, why do you want my cum?" Tommy couldn't help but ask. Sazu took a deep breath and began to orate once more.

"Our might queen Maxima, in her boundless and awesome foresight, can see tha-"

"Look, I just need someone's seed, alright?" Maxima said with exasperation. "My people are expecting me to come back to Almerac with a husband or at least an heir. Everyone else on this worthless planet has turned me down. You're going to give me your seed and you're going to like it, okay?" Maxima seemed to grow taller as she got angrier and angrier. Clearly this trip hadn't gone as she hoped.

Tommy thought for a moment. 'Eh, what the Hell...'

"I'll do it," He said. Maxima and Sazu both smiled widely.

"Huzzah!" Sazu yelled triumphantly.

"About time," Maxima said, relieved.

"So," Tommy said, somewhat eager to get started, "Do we need to find a more private place to do this or...?"

The two women didn't respond. Instead, the herald Sazu held out a small cup. Tommy's face fell and he looked at it with confusion.

"What's this?" He asked, holding the cup up to his face.

"It's a receptacle for your seed," Sazu explained.

"...What?" Tommy asked.

"Cum in that," Maxima ordered. "My scientists will configure your seed and my egg in a proper distribution of genes to ensure the best possible heir for my people."

"Oh," Tommy said softly. He was profoundly disappointed. "I guess I'll fill this up then."

"Yes, do what you have to do," Maxima said, waving her hand dismissively. She was barely paying attention. Tommy turned slightly and dropped to his knees. He pulled out his (once firmly erect, now softening) cock and began to tug on it. He tried to clear his mind of everything except Maxima's tits. It was hard, though, with Sazu and Maxima talking nearby.

"Your majesty," Sazu said to her queen, "The Earthling appears to have some sort of abnormality on his... oh my..." Tommy looked and could see Sazu's face reddening. He noticed that she was looking directly at his cock.

"What?" Maxima said, disinterested. She did a small double-take when she saw Tommy's cock but otherwise continued to tap her foot impatiently, waiting for Tommy to cum. Even his cock wasn't enough to make her think him an equal.

Tommy jerked his dick quickly, trying to imagine himself with Maxima. She was on her knees in front of him, greedily sucking his dick. "You are the greatest hero I've ever seen!" Maxima moaned between swallows of Tommy's dick. Tommy would pull his dick out and sandwich it between her amazing tits. Maxima would moan, almost cumming just from the power of Tommy's cock. Tommy could feel himself getting ready to cum and he imagined pulling his dick from between Maxima's tits and shooting his load all over her fa-

"Are you done?" Maxima asked impatiently. Tommy's illusion was shattered and he could feel his orgasm slipping away. He groaned.

"Do you mind?" Tommy said, somewhat annoyed. He was doing her a favor, after all. Maxima huffed and began to tap her foot louder.

Tommy closed his eyes again and tried to use his imagination once more. He imagined himself fucking Maxima. He'd have her on her back, fucking deep inside her. She'd moan and play with her tits while he pumped inside her again and again. Finally he'd cum, moving himself so that his seed shot all over her face. She'd beg for more, greedily swallowing what little she could get in her mou-

"God, this is taking forever," Maxima pouted. "I bet Superman wouldn't have taken this long."

Tommy furiously jerked his dick and then stopped in frustration. This wasn't going to work.

"Why are you stopping?" Maxima asked contemptuously. "You need to cum now!"

"Look, I'm trying but it's not working," Tommy growled back. "It'd be a lot easier if you two weren't yapping so much."

Sazu recoiled in fear; Tommy didn't think anyone talked to Maxima like had just done. Maxima looked at him angrily and then, suddenly, surprised Tommy.

She dropped to her knees beside him and began jerking his dick.

"Your majesty!" Sazu yelled in horror. "You can't touch this commoner's cock!"

"Shut up, Sazu," Maxima said annoyedly. "We need some seed, don't we? Unless you can think of a better way..."

"No, no, this might work," Tommy said. He fell back onto his ass, both hands resting behind him on the tarmac. He placed the cup beside himself and relaxed. Maxima quickly jerked Tommy's dick, pausing only to deposit a small amount of spit on his head. She rolled her hand along the top, getting it slick with spit, and then firmly grasped Tommy's dick and began jerking it once more.

"Fuck that feels good," Tommy moaned. He half-opened his eyes and watched Maxima jerk his cock, her tits bouncing with every motion of her hand. She was looking down, seemingly concentrating. Her mouth was open slightly and Tommy could see her tongue just barely sticking out.

Beyond her, Sazu was standing somewhat disturbed. The priestess (or whatever she was) had her arms crossed and she turned to the side, seemingly so that she couldn't see how her queen was debasing herself. Tommy noticed that she hadn't turned away completely, though, and Sazu's eyes were glued to Tommy's dick. She glanced up and saw Tommy looking at her, scowled, and turned completely away. Tommy smiled and raised his hips off the ground, trying to will himself to cum.

"Are you going to cum yet?" Maxima asked. She switched hands, giving her left hand a long lick before she began stroking Tommy's cock.

"Just keep jerking," Tommy said. He was legitimately trying to cum but it was difficult; he had already come close but was interrupted twice and his body had seemingly resigned itself to the fact that it wasn't going to cum. Tommy could feel his balls aching and his cock quivering but, try as he might, he couldn't feel himself ready to cum. He relaxed his hips and sunk into the tarmac a little bit as he felt Maxima jerking ineffectually on his rod.